Review Responses~
KeepingThemAtBay: It did come a book! It came from "Before the Awakening"! Really loved everything about Poe in it. And yeah, of course they would. Best couple of dad's for the job too!
JunJunyil: I've been known to be a bit cruel ahaha.
ShigureAyameHatoriFanClub: Welp, like I said, a lot of it was from the book, but I added a few things here and there.
Guest x2: Thank you, and no, I don't think it is. There spats end up showing a lot of their character.
sarahmichellegallerfan1: Thanks for the reivews!
~TheObsessory
To The Stars and Back
Chapter 19; So This Is Goodbye
A Fanfiction written by TheObsessory
Poe and I debriefed with Leia the next morning, which is what we usually would have done straight after coming in after our mission. C-3P0 needed time to go through the databases on the Hevurion Grace before a thorough debriefing could be had. We had both received messages from the General early that morning, telling us to meet her at her office immediately.
We currently both sat at her desk while Leia paced around the room.
"How are you feeling?" She asked us abruptly.
"I'm… I'm fine, General."
"Same goes for me." We answered quickly.
"I'll rephrase that," She arched an eyebrow, "What are you feeling?"
"I'm angry." Poe admitted, "And I'm worried, General. A member of the Republic Senate was in so deep with the First Order that when he put out a distress call they came to try and rescue him, and when they did it, they pulled out all the stops. Two Star Destroyers and I couldn't count how many TIEs, and maybe they knew he was no longer aboard but maybe they didn't, but they wanted Hevurion Grace destroyed. They were willing to kill their man to keep us from taking that vessel."
"And you, Sidra?" Both pairs of eyes went to me.
"I'm angry, too, but I'm not surprised." I shivered slightly at the cold air, "It's a different situation, but still so similar. There are those on the Senate who are corrupt, leading the Republic to believe that peace can be held with the First Order. And they're just spouting lies. And they're going to keep doing that until they're accused, justly, then tried."
"Yet you still both believe in the Republic."
"Absolutely, yes." "Of course." We answered in unison, but Poe continued on, "I remember how my parents spoke about life under the Empire. The fear, they said it was like a cloud everywhere you went, that it was so thick you could… you could breathe it. They used to say, until the Rebellion… they said you could see hopelessness in the eyes of everyone you met."
"That's the word," Leia said quietly, more to herself, "Without hope."
"Where did it go?" He asked.
"I don't know," She said, "But I know we have to find it again. And we will."
She dug around in a drawer on her desk for a moment before pulling out a slender data chip, holding it up for both Poe and I to examine.
"We obtained a lot of information from the computers aboard the Hevurion Grace." The General started, "A wealth of information. But there was something else, something that… others may have missed. A piece of a puzzle I've been working for… for a long time to solve."
A sadness overcame Leia just then. A sadness that had sprouted once or twice in the few years I had known her, but none so much as now.
"I think the First Order is trying to solve it, too." She sat the data chip before us, "We have to solve it first. We have to find him first."
"Who?" We asked together, both a bit lost.
"His name is Lor San Tekka."
"Lor San Tekka." Poe repeated.
"Why's the First Order so desperate to find him?"
"They think he knows something. I'm hoping he does, too." She finally sat down, a fire of hope burning in her eyes, "I'm hoping Lor San Tekka knows where to find my brother. And Luke Skywalker may be the only hope we have left."
"I can't believe I'm not going. Actually I can't believe I was ordered not to." I growled, sitting cross legged on Poe's bed.
It was a couple of days after Poe and I had received the data chip hopefully leading to Luke Skywalker from Leia. The trail Tekka left behind was confusing and crypted; mostly small bits that the First Order had picked up on here and there. Poe would have to figure the rest of the puzzle out himself.
When we confronted Leia with what little information we had taken from the chip, Leia had been clear I was not to go.
"What?" I shot back at her a bit too quickly, forgetting my manners, "Why not?"
"The two of you would draw too much unwanted attention. What little pieces you have are in some very unfavorable places in the galaxy, most likely teaming with First Order spies. If they start seeing you in all the places they're checking, you're lighting the beacon straight towards you and probably right on Tekka as well. If it's just Poe, he'll stand out less."
Her logic was solid, but I still wasn't happy.
"It's a one man job, anyway, Sid. What are you so worried about?" Poe tossed a small bag onto the bed next to me, rummaging through drawers and his closet for some clothes. No one knew how long it would take to find Tekka.
"I'm worried about you, Poe. You've gotten better but you're still reckless."
I caught whatever clothes he flung into the bag and folded them neatly before placing them back in, biting the inside of my lip.
"This'll be your first mission alone."
"It is not." He began rummaging through some of his desk drawers, "I've been out on my own dozens of times."
"Maybe, but nothing like this. You're going to have the First Order on your tail straight off the get go, no doubt. And who's going to be there to watch your back?"
BB-8 chirped from where he sat on the ground, clearly offended.
"Okay, who else who can handle a gun and take over complete navigation of your ship should something happen to you?" I said this in the direction of the orange droid, smiling at his discontented blips, "Besides, something doesn't feel right, and hasn't for the last few weeks. It's like something is coming. And I'm worried Poe. It feels like the calm before the storm, like a wave about to crash on the beach. I'm worried-"
"I get it!" Poe exclaimed, turning on his heel to stare straight at me, brows furrowed, "You're worried! If you wanted to worry about me and hound at me like my wife, you had your chance years ago."
My mouth snapped shut as we stared at each other, my heart rate picking up. The silence grew as we stared, trying to formulate a response.
"We had this conversation a while ago." I swallowed the lump forming in my throat, "I told you I was scared-"
"You were scared?" Poe let out a bark of laughter, "You think you were scared? How do you think I felt, Sid? Every decision I made wasn't just for me. If it all came falling down, if it went up in flames, it wasn't just me taking the fall, it was you. You've been following me our whole lives, school, jobs, everything." He paused here, shaking his head, "You were scared of change? Well here's some advice: When it feels scary to jump, that is exactly when you jump, Sid. Otherwise you end up staying in the same place your whole life."
We both fell silent.
I was unable to find any words to convey what I felt- I honestly wasn't sure what I felt.
"That night when I kissed you?" He began to talk again, "I was convinced because you'd been following me for the last eight years, you'd follow me forever. I had fallen so in love with you. Your smile, your ability to make me laugh, to make me feel better, even when mom…" He took a deep, but shakey, breath, his voice less angry and more sad when he began to speak again, "I wanted you to follow me everywhere. I wanted to join the Resistance and fight side by side with you like my own parents did. I wanted to marry you and when all this had ended, when the galaxy was finally at peace again, I wanted to go back to Yavin 4 and have a family with you. I wanted to show our children the tree my mom planted and tell them all the stories of the galaxy from the beginning of time."
I could hardly keep my eyes on him, he looked so pained.
I caused this.
I hadn't noticed the tears dampening my cheeks until then.
In a miserable silence, Poe finished packing his bag, zipped it up and turned to the door without another look toward me, BB-8 following cautiously at his feet, confused beeps sounding every once in awhile.
"Poe." I shot up from the bed, impulsively thinking to myself that I wanted nothing more than to hold him in place and never let him leave my side, but rationally knowing better and stopping myself. Instead, as I stood there shaking, I spoke a sudden realization of mine
"To be fair." Poe paused at the door, "You say I've been following you, but you never once let go of my hand."
After a few more moments of silence, Poe lifted the shoulder strap over his head and walked out of the room, the door sliding closed behind him.
BUM BUM BUUUUUUM.
I think we all know where this is going. TFA is beginning!
Which is lucky, because I just bought the movie and will have chapters 22 and 23 done in no time!
Coming Up in Chapter 20: Sidra's long dormant force sensitivity returns and we find out the meaning behind the necklace, but where's Poe?
~TheObsessory
