Note: Hey guys! I'm gonna keep this note short! I'm so sorry for not updating sooner, but real life has been a mess and it still is. I also feel like maybe this story hasn't been getting as many reviews I was kind of hoping for, but those of you who have been commenting have been wonderful, so I'm not complaining! I'm just saying that it would be nice to get just a little more responses on what you guys think about the story! I'd really appreciate it and it would fuel me to write faster! :)

Please enjoy this chapter!


A Sharp Intake Of Breath (And A Memory Forgotten)

Chapter 3

Dreams.

She knew what they were; she'd had them too many times to count, as everyone else. They were a series of thoughts, images and sensations that occurred in a person's mind during sleep – a piece of imagination conjured up by the things that surrounded one in their all-day-life.

Beth knew what dreams were and what she was seeing in front of her now was anything but that.

It was like she was watching a scene play out in front of her. She was herself but at the same time, she could see another girl that looked almost identical to her sitting on a chair, fingers pressing down on the keys of an old piano. The only difference between the two of them was that the Beth who was playing the instrument and singing softly didn't have any of the scars that Beth knew that her own face was sporting.

There were lit candles surrounding her and Beth watched, listening to the lyrics of the song, trying to recall why they sounded so familiar. That was when she knew that this wasn't a dream. It couldn't be, because it was a memory.

She watched what she could only assume to be her old self, singing the words to a song that she deep down knew that she once upon a time must have sung. Beth observed her from the side, but the other her didn't notice her presence. She moved a little closer, but as she did, she felt chills run up her spine and she turned around at the exact moment someone cleared their throat.

Daryl was standing in the doorway and the Beth who had been playing the piano stopped abruptly and turned to face him. They spoke to one another and all Beth could do was listen. Daryl was telling the piano playing her that he had made sure that the place was locked up tight. Then, he moved toward the open casket that was a couple of meters away from the other Beth. They bantered for a little moment, the old her questioning why Daryl was laying down in the coffin and he made some bad joke about it being the most comfortable bed he'd had in years.

Beth found herself moving closer to him, watching as the lit candles illuminated his face and drew shadows on it as he laid down and turned to face the old her.

"Why don't you go ahead... An' play some more?" Daryl prompted. "Keep singin'."

"I thought my singin' annoyed you?" the other Beth asked.

Beth's heart beat a little faster as she heard him telling her that there wasn't a jukebox around and suddenly she recalled that night when they had been returning to the farm after they had been attacked in the mall by some of John's men. She understood now, why she had felt Daryl tense by her side after she had asked him to keep humming and now she knew for certain why that tune had sounded so familiar to her. It was because they had had a similar conversation once, except that it had been reversed. He had been the one to tell her to keep singing and Beth knew it now for sure.

Because this wasn't a dream. It was a memory.

-§-

Beth's eyes slowly fluttered open. Taking in her surroundings, she noticed that there seemed to be a little less snow surrounding them, but her breath still fogged up the window which meant that it was most likely cold outside. She turned toward Daryl who was driving and gave him a once over. He was more rested now, that much was clear, but he had clearly started driving again before she had woken up.

"G'mornin'," he said when he noticed she was finally awake.

Beth smiled at him and reached over to put her hand on his knee. "Good morning," she said back, smiling when he covered her hand with his and brought hers up to his lips, giving her a small kiss on the back of it. Silence fell between them and Beth's hand remained in Daryl's, although it was a comfortable silence that she had o intention of breaking for now.

She couldn't help but think back to her dream though. It had been a strange one, that was for sure. It wasn't the first time she had had the feeling that what she dreamed was more memory than actual fiction created by her mind, but whenever she would wake up, she would once again doubt that it had happened for real. Before, when she had been alone with Morgan, those kind of dreams plagued her more than anything because she never would have thought that she would be reunited with her family again. It had been frustrating, back then, being aware deep down in her heart that she should know who the people she was dreaming about were, but not being able to put a face to the shadows behind the veil that blocked her vision from them. Her memories had begun coming back more vividly after she had been reunited with her family and it seemed as if it was their voices that triggered some of them, giving her the ability to see who it was that was speaking in her dreams.

She had talked to Daryl about it once. About how she had dreamed about a man calling her name, running after her as she was being driven away in a car somewhere. Daryl had tightened his grip on her when she had shared how she had never been able to see anything other than a silhouette in his place, but how after getting to know him and letting pieces fall into place, she had realized that he had been the one she had dreamed about. He had understood when she had explained to him that the memories sometimes were to painful to remember; how much she hurt physically from remembering.

Beth cleared her throat, "How long have you been drivin'?" Her voice was a little raspy and Daryl's grip on her hand tightened slightly. Beth blinked a couple of times before squeezing her eyes shut as she felt a headache coming.

"Two hours or so," Daryl replied. She could feel his eyes train on her. "Your head hurtin'?"

"You know me so well," Beth muttered, rubbing her temple.

"Mhm..." Daryl hummed, not saying anything else and Beth was glad for that. She wasn't sure she could talk about the dream or memory that she had experienced while sleeping.

"I can drive in an hour, okay?" Beth shut her eyes again.

"Ya don't gotta, Beth," Daryl said.

"I thought we agreed that we would switch," Beth raised an eyebrow, not bothering to open her eyes. She knew that he was watching her rather than the road.

"If ya ain't feelin' well, then I don't want ya drivin'," he shared. "But as ya said, I know ya, so I know I won't be able to stop ya if ya really wanna do it."

Beth smiled at that but made no further comment. It was good that they were on the same page about this and that Daryl understood that she wasn't going to let him to all the hard work on this trip. They needed to work together and that was the most important thing if they were going to be able to make it back to the farmhouse.

-§-

Beth had been quiet for a while now and it was slowly eating at Daryl. The two of them had switched places a couple of hours ago after they had made a short stop to radio in on Rick and the others. They had passed the border to Georgia and were now headed for North Carolina, but they needed to let the rest of their family know that the radios were still working and that they were fine. The call, however, had been cut short when five walkers stumbled out from nowhere, but even that hadn't been much of a fight considering that they had been only skin and bone, barely standing.

And now, Beth was quiet.

She was driving and Daryl was pretending to be going over the maps even though all of his focus was actually on her. He could tell that there was something on her mind and he knew that it probably had to do with the dream she had had. Sometimes she dreamed things that Daryl knew were memories and usually, when that happened, she would get those headaches and Daryl figured that it might be because the gates to her long forgotten memories opened slightly, letting something float through.

But then again, what the fuck did he know? He had certainly never had his entire memory wiped clean after being shot in the head. Daryl winced internally when he recalled that day and he was forced to actually close his eyes and force the images away from his mind. That was over. Beth was alive and breathing next to him and she wasn't going anywhere.

"A couple of miles ahead there's gonna be a small convenience store," Daryl said, finally breaking the silence. "Eugene mapped it out for us as one of the easier targets to scavenge, but it'll prob'ly be all emptied out."

Beth nodded slowly, "Sometimes I wonder how much time has actually passed since all of this began. I mean, what do we do when there are no more places to scavenge?"

"People will always make it, Beth," Daryl muttered. "One way or another, the survivors out there are gonna make due of what they have."

"Feels like we've gone back in time," Beth mused. "It's a wonder that we've managed to siphon this much fuel from around the farm area."

"Luck ain't got nothin' to do with it, Lil' Bird," Daryl said. "Eugene saved us there when he started experimentin' with making fuel."

"Can't argue with that," Beth smiled. Daryl had noted how she always seemed happy when people would sing Eugene praises. Sure, the man was awkward as fuck sometimes, but Daryl knew that he could be too from time to time. Eugene completely lacked social skills and would normally end up making the people around him feel weird while Daryl actually chose not to speak more than necessary. There was a difference between them and Daryl knew that everyone else was aware of it. Still, at times he couldn't help but draw parallels to when he had been younger; before the world went to shit and all that. He had never been much of a talker and he hadn't liked people all that much, so outside of Merle, he didn't really have other people to socialize with. It hadn't bothered him back then though, but now that he had a bigger group – a family – Daryl knew that he couldn't imagine spending the rest of his life without them. He wanted to protect them and in the end, they all helped each other to survive. Things in the family had been changing over the last couple of months. The bonds had grown stronger than ever and Daryl knew that even though he wasn't actually related to any of them by blood, they were more of a family than he had ever had before.

Then there was Beth: the woman he loved who always tried to see the best in people. When they had been reunited, he had wondered if that part of her was gone because she had been so hardened by having survived the gunshot and he thought for a while that she may have lost that piece of herself along the way of being forced to survive alone with Morgan. As time went by though, Daryl learned that there was more of the old Beth in her than he had ever been able to imagine. All one had to do was scratch a little on the hard surface for her to shine through and Daryl not-so-secretly loved it when Beth said something without thinking that proved to him that there was still a lot of the old her in there. It was still a fact though that he would never want her to change for him. She was hardened, yes, and she might not have wanted to give them a chance at first when they had been reunited, but it was more about her actually being stronger than before. What she had gone through at the hospital – from what she had remembered and what she had told him – had been a beginning for her. Daryl sometimes wondered if her change began even before that, when the two of them had been alone and he had taken to teaching her how to hunt and track, but he wouldn't want to pride himself with taking the honor of that.

She had made it and she was stronger and better than ever before and each and every day he fell more and more in love with her. Earlier when he had been talking to Rick, she had been the one to keep watch and as soon as those walkers had stumbled toward them, she had taken out her throwing knives. Within seconds she had taken down two of the walkers all by herself and Daryl had wondered whether he would actually need to intervene, considering how well she had been handling herself with them. She was a survivor, just like him and the rest of their family and every time she reminded him of that through her actions, she made him prouder and prouder.

Even though he didn't like pushing her, Daryl wondered deep down what it was that had her so deep in thoughts today. He wondered if she would share the dream that she had had with him or if he would have to ask her about her distant mind before she actually said something about it.

Then again, Daryl found that he was always patient when it came to Beth. He knew that she would eventually speak her mind and when she did, he was certain that he would be willing to talk to her about whatever it may be that was bothering her.

-§-

Beth walked through the isles of the small convenience store, looking for anything that they might be able to take with them home. There weren't that many things for newborns to begin with, but she managed to find some pacifiers and baby bottles that had been untouched. Daryl was on the other side of the store, looking for any kind of medicine that might have been sold there as well as anything else they could find that would be useful for them later on.

There had been two walkers in the store but both had been so decayed that they hadn't even been able to move toward them. One had been the manager, obviously and the other had been a woman who had been working as a cashier. Beth wondered silently what had been their story. Had they just gone to work one day and ended up barricading themselves into the store when walkers began taking over the roads or had there been something more to them? She brushed the thoughts away though when she found an unopened bag of potato chips. She shook it and called out for Daryl who turned his head toward her and grinned when he saw what she was holding up. They both knew that the chips were most likely going to be stale as hell, but who gave them the right to be picky in a world where everything was slowly disappearing from existence? Then again, now that she actually thought about it, they might be able to make their own chips from the potatoes they planted at the farm. Why hadn't they thought about that idea before? It would surely make those lazy evenings when they would stay up all night playing cards and board games more fun for them.

Her mind traveled to her family back on the farm. She hadn't gotten the chance to speak to Maggie or Morgan yet and she had to admit that she missed them a lot. Then again, she missed everyone from the farm, but she was so used to always having Morgan there to talk to about her dreams and Maggie was her only blood relative, and she was pregnant. Beth wondered how she was doing despite the fact that she knew that the others were watching out for her sister. Them watching out for Maggie didn't mean that Beth couldn't miss her and right now, she needed someone to talk to first before approaching Daryl with the dream she'd had.

Although, maybe she wouldn't need to talk to someone else first? Daryl's her partner in every way and she trusted him with her life and more. She loved him, so a part of her didn't really understand why she was being reluctant to talk to him about it. It wasn't as if she hadn't talked to him about her dreams before, but for some reason, since this was a memory more vivid than most of the others that she had gotten back, Beth was kind of nervous about it all.

They were in such a good place right now that Beth was a little scared that Daryl might start expecting her to remember even more if such a detailed dream truly turned out to be a memory. Another thing she was afraid of was Daryl being upset for her bringing up the past. She knew that he had been through a lot emotionally when he had thought that she was dead. The things he had told her about those months he had been without her proved more than anything how much he had been hurting and she didn't want to remind him of a time that had led up to them being separated. It would be painful, both for him and for her, and Beth didn't know if she could bring herself to bring it up.

"Jackpot," Daryl grinned, lifting a pack of cigarettes in her direction. Beth rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help but smirk at him. "After we're done here, I'm gonna take a smoke and you can stretch your legs for a little longer."

"Sounds good," Beth agreed, looking at some old gift cards.

She needed to get her head straight and she needed to make a decision. Daryl deserved to know that she had remembered something and she was kind of curious to know about it all; her past. The worst thing about it all though was that Beth had felt Daryl's eyes on her all day long and she knew that he knew her well enough to see that something was off with her. She was being distant without actually meaning to and Daryl was smart. He didn't need her to tell him that something was wrong or that something was on her mind and for the first time since they had started this trip, Beth missed the farmhouse.

There, she would have been able to just lay in their bed all day and he would come to her after doing whatever it was he was working on then, or they would have gone on a hunting trip again and talked it all out then. Either way, she would have had time to think things through and figure out a good way to approach him on the topic.

Beth sighed to herself.

Her head was pounding again.

-§-

Daryl took another drag from the cigarette between his thumb and forefinger. A little further away from him, Beth was stretching. Daryl enjoyed watching her do that and he imagined if any other man had a partner like he had, they wouldn't exactly be shy about enjoying watching them stretch out limbs that from time to time wrapped around their own hips as they pounded into their partners tight body.

Except, this time around, Daryl wasn't watching her because he enjoyed it. It had to do with why she was doing it. Normally when she did it, it was just about relaxation after a long day, but today Daryl knew that it was about the tension that had been set in her shoulders all day. Something had been going on and Daryl knew the signs, but he wouldn't push. He had a feeling that she was slowly reaching that point where she knew that she had no other choice but to talk to him.

His nerves were getting the better of him though. He wanted to be there for her more than ever, maybe because they were alone, or maybe just because he knew that deep down she needed him to be. Perhaps that was why he finally spoke up.

"Beth," he said, blowing out the smoke through his nose. Him saying her name – no matter how quiet it might have been – turned her attention to him and he watched her as she frowned a little.

"Yeah?"

"Are ya good?"

Beth watched him for another moment before nodding. He kept looking at her, taking another drag from his smoke without taking his eyes off of her. Finally, she sighed.

"I had a dream," she admitted.

Daryl nodded, "Figured as much." Another drag of the cigarette. "Wanna talk about it?"

She seemed to hesitate but finally she spoke and Daryl hated himself for freezing for a moment.

"I dreamed about a funeral home. I was playing the piano and you were watching me," she said.

Daryl remembered that night. He remembered that time.

"We should keep drivin' if we wanna get those other stores before headin' over to North Carolina," Daryl said, looking away from her for a moment.

When he looked at her again, he cursed himself for not expressing himself in another way. It was clear that she thought that he didn't want to talk about it all, even though he actually was willing to do so. All he needed was a little moment to wrap his mind around the whole thing.

"Okay," Beth said, getting in the passenger seat before he had the chance to say another word. She closed the door and Daryl just knew that he might have fucked things up a little.

He threw the cigarette in the snow, angry with himself before walking around the truck, getting in the driver's seat.

They had been on the road again for about half an hour before he spoke again. Beth had tried to not make it awkward by taking out some food and offering him some but he knew her well enough to sense that she still thought that he had dismissed her earlier. It ate at him, knowing that he had unintentionally hurt her feelings by speaking the way he had and he knew that he wanted to make things right again.

"It's real," he mumbled, glancing her way. He could feel it in his bones when her eyes settled on him and he knew that she was waiting for him to continue. "The funeral home… It happened."

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Beth put down the bag of chips that she had begun munching on as dessert. "Will you tell me about it?" she asked him, sounding like she genuinely wanted to know.

"Hm… Don't even know where to begin," he admitted. "It was after we burned down that shack. We'd been walking for a good coupl'a days when we came across it. You'd hurt your ankle and I had to carry ya."

"You carried me?" She sounded amused by the thought. He'd carried her quite a few times since they had gotten together, but he assumed that she thought it was funny that he had done it before as well. He had never actually told her about that piggyback ride.

"Yeah," he drawled. "An' ya were heavier than ya looked. Even told ya that and you just laughed right at me," he shared, earning himself a giggle. His own mouth twitched, glad that they were good again but he knew he needed to keep telling the story. "We found the place an' it seemed safe enough. There was food and there weren't any walkers 'round so we decided to stay for the night. Ya found that piano while I was making sure we were locked in safely," he shared.

"I remember, you saying something about the place being locked up tight," Beth said. She was turned toward him now in her seat, like someone who was listening intently to a story being told.

"I watched ya play for a while… The things I felt for ya then, they were nothin' compared to what I feel now," he said. "You were my only companion then an' I had never really spent time with ya alone before then. But ya made me see you," he turned toward her, meeting her eyes, knowing that there wasn't anything on the road in front of them anyway for him to hit by accident. "I saw you, that night, when you were playin' an' I didn't know it back then, but I know now that that was the moment I knew that I wouldn't be able to live without ya."

At his admission, Beth's eyes softened even more and her mouth fell slightly open. He held her gaze for another moment before turning away from her, settling them on the road again.

"The next evening, ya asked me what changed my mind about good people existin'," he said. "I had told ya that we could stay there and in case whoever it was that had been living there ever came back, we could make it work. I wanted ya to be happy there… 'Cause I was almost starting to be."

"Daryl, you don't have to tell me if you don't wanna," Beth said quietly. It was clear that she could sense that what was coming was painful for him, but he needed to keep going.

"I froze, Beth," he sighed. "I chickened out an' didn't tell ya that you were the reason I'd changed my mind about people. Ya got it then, I think, 'cause ya just looked at me an' I knew that ya knew… Then a dog we'd seen the day before started makin' noises an' I went to the door 'cause I just needed to get away. I didn't know what ya were gonna say but I was sure that it wasn't gonna be pretty. I probably scared ya–"

"Daryl," Beth interrupted him. "I may not remember everything from before, but I can tell you that there is no way in hell that I would have been scared by you." Her tone was firm and decided and Daryl couldn't help but swallow tightly.

"Ya were younger then," he told her. "More innocent an' I was a lot older than you… Still am."

"And it hasn't been bothering either of us or our family, so why bring it up now?" Beth wondered.

"It was just how I felt back then," he said. "I know it don't matter none now. I know how ya feel about me, 'cause ya tell me."

Beth reached over and placed her hand over his on the steering wheel. "What happened next?" she asked, pressing him to continue. Daryl took a deep breath.

"I opened the door an' there were walkers everywhere," he said. "I told ya to run and meet me by the road, but ya yelled that ya weren't gonna leave me. I kept tellin' ya to run an' ya did an' then, after I fought my way out of there, I saw that you'd been taken."

"The people at the hospital, right?"

"Didn't know that then," Daryl said. "Weeks had passed before I even got a clue to where ya were. I tried runnin' after the car, but I couldn't. I'm sorry."

Beth squeezed his hand tightly again. "It means the world to me that you looked for me, Daryl," she said. "Even though things went as they did, I'm glad that we're together now because I sure as hell can't imagine my life without you either." She leaned over and pressed her lips against his cheek before pecking his lips as well. "Thank you for telling me about it," she whispered. "I know it couldn't have been easy."

"We need to move forward, right? Can't stay stuck in the past," he said, remembering her words from the moonshine shack. They were here now, together, and the things that had happened before couldn't be changed now. He sometimes wished he could go back, but he knew that there was no way of knowing if things would have had the same outcome. He and Beth might never have ended up together, or maybe they would have been together sooner. There was no way of knowing, which meant that there was no point in dwelling on it.

"I love you, Daryl," Beth spoke beside him, "and I promise that the next time you stop this car, I'm gonna kiss you properly to show you just how much I do." Daryl felt a smile tugging on his lips again and he couldn't help himself.

Beth laughed out loud when he began slowing the car down and his chest felt like a huge weight had been lifted and his heart a lot easier.


Note: Awww, Daryl! So, what did you guys think? I know this chapter was a little filler-y, but don't forget that even in these chapters, I'm planting seeds for future chapters!

So, to get the reviews going a little, please answer there questions:

1. What did you like the most about this chapter?

2. Is there some memory that you would like me to address in particular and have Beth and Daryl talk about? (I have another one planned, but I'm not telling which one!)

3. What do you think will happen next?

Thank you so much for reading and I would really, really, really appreciate it if you guys took some time to write a little review! It doesn't even have to be a big one, but I would really like to know what you think! :)

Have a lovely day/night/whatever time it is where you live! xx