The rest of the remainder of the cruise was done in a blink of an eye. Joss had been wishing and hoping for the remaining days to go extremely slow, unlike her original wish of the cruise going extremely quickly. They spent all day together and Shaw inserted herself into their family time but it was alright because, oddly enough, she felt like an extension to their family rather than an unwanted intrusion. Maddie enjoyed Sam's antics and always got into a good giggle fit when Sam was around with her and her daddy's shenanigans. Maddie, and mommy too, especially enjoyed Shaw pushing John into the pool and John's retaliation of stealing Shaw's sandwich before she could even get a bite into it was comical. They were much less tense now that their case was finished and they really reminded her of brother and sister with the way they treated each other.

It was just fun talking, laughing, and spending time together even with Shaw and the Wixoms at times. And then at night when Maddie was asleep; it was just her and John, making love, then cuddling and talking, finally followed by restful sleep. It was so nice having his arms wrapped around her, holding her so snugly and securely. And then when she woke up in the morning, he was still there and she was content. It was perfect and amazing, just how she wanted every morning to be.

But now the real world was raining down on them because they were docked at Fort Lauderdale and it was time to go back home. Home for her and Maddie was in New York while John lived in Washington D.C. and not once during the last couple days they spent together did they talk about their future after the cruise ended. They had blissfully put away the real world and lived in a bubble and the delightful bubble just popped as she stood with Maddie beside her large suitcase and carryon.

Joss held Maddie's hand tight as she watched John and Shaw heading over towards them. John had gone back to the stateroom before they docked to help make sure everything went alright with the security screening with Shaw. Her heart clenched at the sight of him as he stood in jeans and just a simple tee, looking about as shabby as she felt because they both knew this goodbye was going to hurt. They just found each other after all this time and now they had to go their separate ways…again.

Maddie moved forward and tugged but realized mommy wanted her to stay put. "Daddy!" she exclaimed in happiness.

"Hey buttercup," he bent and swept her into his arms for a giant hug before straightening. "So, uh, when's your flight back to New York?" he asked as he looked to Joss for the answer.

"In two hours. Harold got me a driver and the airport isn't that far from here, so I'll have enough time to get through security." Joss answered quietly, feeling it harder to pretend that this wasn't hurting. She didn't know where they stood and talking about it right here and right now wasn't a very good option. "How about you guys?" she asked forcing the polite talk.

"We don't leave until another couple hours," John admitted.

"Mommy?"

Joss swallowed hard, knowing she was going to have to tell Maddie pretty soon what was going on and she was not looking forward to it. "Yes, sweetheart?" she focused attention on her baby.

"I wanna go swimming." she announced looking at the ship.

"I'm sorry, honey, but we can't. We go home today." Joss said gently as she leaned down and cupped her daughter's chin. "But when we get home I'll take you to your favorite toy store," she offered. She knew she was bribing Maddie but she didn't care. Once she realized she was going home without Her daddy, Maddie was going to be very upset.

"Okay," Maddie agreed with a smile, liking that idea, before looking at John. "Daddy, we go home today."

John stiffened and he forced a bright cheerful smile Joss could tell he wasn't feeling. "We do," he agreed with lack of enthusiasm.

"I wanna show you my room and all my toys, daddy," Maddie said brightly as if she wasn't opening a wound but inadvertently she was because he wanted to go home with them, but he couldn't. He had to go to the office tomorrow to do his reports and then meet with Control, then maybe, he could ask for a meeting with her about a transfer too. But knowing Ma'am, she was going to make him pencil in an appointment with her receptionist. Being away from her and Joss was going to be the hard.

"Uh-oh, I smell tears coming," Shaw whispered as she backpedaled as she tugged her phone out.

John hesitated before he got down to his daughter's level and grabbed her little hands. He kept his smile on his face as he rubbed his thumbs over her little hands. "I look forward to seeing your room, Maddie, but I'm not going home with you and mommy today," he said softly. Maddie's lip wobbled immediately and John felt like he cut his own heart open. "Sweetheart, it's not forever. I'll be seeing you and mommy again," he promised. But it wasn't enough because tears slid down and John let go of her hands and she turned to Joss crying. Joss bent and scooped her up as she cried.

Joss stood holding Maddie who was sobbing in her neck. "Baby, daddy lives someplace else, he has to go to work."

"Why?"

John leaned in close as he wrapped an arm around Joss's waist. "I don't want to leave you and mommy but mommy's right, I have to go to work, buttercup," he said softly which didn't console Maddie at all. She was crying and mumbling out that she didn't want him to go. He wasn't going to promise that he would be in New York forever after a few days and not be able to deliver on it. That would hurt his daughter even more if he couldn't get a quick transfer or if he had to put his two weeks in. It was up to Control on how she wanted to play it.

He stepped back and Joss stared into his eyes. "This really sucks," Joss whispered gruffly feeling about as crummy as their daughter. She didn't want John to leave any more than Maddie did.

John nodded as Shaw stayed back to give them at least a little privacy. As much privacy as outside of a docked cruise ship could as Joss waited for her car. "I know this sucks. We'll figure it out, Joss, just give me a little time," he murmured.

He reached out to touch Joss's cheek, "I need to head to D.C. to do paperwork for this case and debrief with my superior and I'll come into New York for a few days," he promised.

"Okay," Joss said softly as she rubbed a soothing hand over Maddie's back as she cried. "That sounds fair. Um, text me when you are coming, so I can show her. She'll be counting down the days until you come back," she admitted and John's look said it all. So she added, "So will I."

"Joss—"

Joss forced a smile on her face. "I'm not saying this to guilt you. I'm saying it because it's the truth, John."

"I'll miss you both more," he guaranteed.

"When we get back home, could we possibly Facetime each other so she can see you?" she asked softly.

John stepped forward. "Of course," he reassured her as he rubbed Joss's arm and stared at Maddie, wishing there was some way he could take her pain from her. Giving her a hug wasn't going to work this time.

Tears slid from Joss's eyes as she held their daughter and stared at John. He looked about as good as she felt right now. "I hate this. We just found each other again and I'm not ready to say goodbye yet," she whispered roughly.

He looked at her and reached out to rub away the few tears that slipped down her cheeks. "It's not goodbye Joss, it's: see you later," he murmured.

Joss nodded. "I know. We have to talk about things."

"We will when I fly in to New York; we can talk about everything then," he agreed. "I love you Joss," he whispered.

More tears spilled out. "I love you too," she whispered roughly. Joss stepped back to look at Shaw. "Shaw," she murmured and the woman looked up and at her. "Take care of this one for me will you?" Joss asked with a nod to John.

Shaw smirked. "That I can do!"

"I know we got off on the wrong foot at first, Shaw; but I'm glad I got to know you, because you're really a good person and I like to think of you as a friend," Joss said sincerely.

John turned to look back at Shaw and saw her staring at Joss. It seemed Joss had a knack for rendering Shaw speechless. He turned to look back at Joss. "She likes you too. You have the ability to tongue tie her," he spoke for Shaw. "Me included," he added and Joss dropped her gaze as she smiled shyly.

John eyed his daughter who didn't seem to care about anything at the moment but the fact that she was leaving and daddy wasn't coming with them. "Maddie," he whispered and she leaned up and reached for him.

"Come with me daddy, pleasssssse," she begged.

John held her as she sobbed into his neck. He rubbed her back. "I wish I could, Maddie. But I have to go to work in D.C., but I will Skype just like you do with your older brother," he said in comfort.

"It'snotthesamedaddy," she cried, her words running together and he was having a tough time discerning what she was saying through her tears.

He rubbed her back as he kissed the top of her head. "I know, cupcake, that it's not the same. But we'll talk every day until I can come see mommy and you. We'll count the days together," he promised.

Joss turned as her name was called. She sighed as she saw Leon approaching her. "Hey there Joss, you're still looking as beautiful as ever!"

John narrowed his eyes on the small man that was complimenting Joss. It wasn't the compliment that bothered him, it was the way the man was looking at her that did. "Who are you?" he demanded as he held Maddie in his arms, her cries quietening as Shaw spoke to her.

Leon puffed his chest out but then coughed as he slackened. "I'm Leon, her driver. And you are?"

"He's the father to my daughter and the man I love," Joss supplied sensing the testosterone levels rising and not in the mood to deal with a jealous John and an amorous Leon who stood no shot. She was in a foul mood at the moment that she and John were being separated…again. And Maddie was as devastated as she knew their daughter was going to be by it.

"Oh," Leon said as he deflated a bit more. "Here let me help you with those," he said as he grabbed her suitcase and proceeded to roll it over to his car.

Joss grimaced. Didn't he remember that he couldn't lift her suitcase the first time?—it hadn't been pretty. In fact it was going to be worse this time because of the souvenirs they purchased, it was heavier and he was struggling to lift it up even a few inches.

"What is this guy, a wimp?" Shaw demanded out loud as they had all walked behind him, following to the car, and Leon glared at her as he let go of the handle of the suitcase.

He puffed out some air from exertion. "I'll have you know I'm in excellent shape but I hurt my rotator cuff and lifting a heavy bag like this suitcase isn't good for it," Leon explained defensively.

John snorted as he stepped forward and lifted the bag with ease and situated it into the trunk with one hand as he kept a firm grip on Maddie who finally quieted down but she still wasn't in the mood to come out from hiding her face in his neck.

"That explanation would work if you managed to lift the bag, Leon," John murmured.

He set Maddie down on her feet which commenced the crying again as he walked over to get Joss's carryon for her. Joss reached down, running a hand through her braids as Maddie wrapped her arms around her leg and buried her face into her knee. John carried it over and set it into the trunk next to the suitcase.

"What's wrong with Muriel?" Leon asked.

Joss rolled her eyes. "Her name is Maddie," she corrected. "And she's upset that daddy can't come home with us."

John crouched down to her level. "Maddie, I love you. I want to kiss and hug you goodbye," he said quietly. Maddie turned and flung her arms around his neck and cried. "I'll be seeing you soon, I promise, baby," he whispered. He held her tightly and kissed her cheek.

Joss sniffed. "Maddie, let daddy go; he promised he'll be seeing us soon and when we get home he'll Facetime with you," she said firmly as she helped pull Maddie back.

John stared deeply into his daughter's sad eyes. "I'll miss you and mommy so much while I'm away at work."

"Do you want Mrs. Pickles to keep you company?" Maddie asked quietly.

John smiled. "It would make me feel so much better," he agreed, sensing she wanted him to have her favorite stuffed animal.

Joss hurried to the trunk and unzipped the carryon to find the damn stuffed bunny she loved. She tugged it out and gave it to Maddie so she could give it to daddy.

Maddie handed him her favorite stuffed bunny. John took it. "Thank you Maddie, Mrs. Pickles will keep me from feeling too lonely without you and mommy," he murmured.

"Yea," she agreed as her eyes were puffy and nose was red.

"I love you, honey,"

Maddie's little lip wobbled. "I-I love y-you daddy," her voice quivered. John kept his pain locked away because Maddie was upset enough for the both of them.

"I know this hurts, Maddie, so I want to give you something of mine to hold onto and keep safe until I can get home to you and mommy. Do you think you can take care of it for me?" he asked.

Maddie nodded, "Yea."

Joss stared at John and Maddie. She wondered what he was going to give their daughter to hang onto because whatever it was she needed to keep an eye on it. Maddie wouldn't mean to lose it but she was four.

"Good," John said with a nod. "I need you to hang onto my heart because wherever you go, Maddie, it goes."

Joss turned around and bit down hard on her lip to keep from making a choked cry. What was John trying to do?—rip her heart out?! She wasn't going to cry in misery until she was alone!

"How daddy?"

"How baby?—easy," he murmured as he reached out with his free hand and lifted her little hand to his chest and held it over his heart. "Now you have it, Maddie, so when I get to New York, to give me my heart back, you have to give me a hug and a kiss on the cheek," he said with a smile.

"Okay," Maddie smiled in return. John straightened and Maddie turned. "Mommy, daddy gave me his heart!"

Joss turned and gave a watery smile. "I heard," she managed as it felt like her chest was constricting and it was a little hard to breathe. She looked up at John and leaned in and kissed him. To hell with Shaw and Leon who were watching, she wanted a kiss to hold onto until John came to New York so they could talk about their future. When he got to New York she was going to ask him to move there permanently because giving their daughter his heart to hold might work this time but it wasn't going to work the next.

John kissed her back softly before he pulled back and opened the door for her.

"Call me when you get into New York safely," he requested gently.

Joss nodded. "I will. And we'll have to Facetime," she said with a look at Maddie who looked ready to cry again.

Leon took that as his cue as he rounded his car and climbed in. Joss sat down and reached out for Maddie. Maddie began crying once more as she sat on her lap. John blew them a kiss. "I love you, Joss and Maddie," he said gruffly.

"I love you, daddy," Maddie cried.

"I love you, John," Joss whispered and she echoed her daughter's sentiments as tears filled her eyes as John stepped back and slid the door closed. Maddie began sobbing. "Go, Leon," she ordered roughly. The quicker they got away from John the easier she could soothe her daughter.

"No, don't go, mommy, I don't wanna leave daddy! Why can't we go with daddy?" she cried.

Joss didn't answer the question because she knew Maddie was just upset. She let Maddie go and she stood up in the backseat to stare out the back window at daddy who must have been waving because she waved back.

Joss kept a firm hold of Maddie's back as she cried but her daughter's sobs of 'daddy' as she watched out the back window nearly shattered her heart. Leon tried to drown out Maddie's sobs with music but it didn't help. Maddie collapsed in mommy's arms as she cried.

"Oh baby, I promise you'll have your daddy one way or another," she vowed, even if that meant they had to move Washington D.C., then it was what she would do. Maddie's happiness was the only thing that mattered and all she wanted was her daddy back. And so did she.


Shaw kept silent as she watched as John kept waving at the car until it disappeared. She knew the whole heart giving was metaphorical, meant to ease Mads' pain, but at the moment she really believed Maddie and Carter had sped off with the damn thing. He looked crushed and she wanted to hit something because she didn't like it. She didn't like Reese looking like Droopy.

She sidled up beside him, not commenting on the few tears that streaked down his cheeks; she didn't know what to say. Jokes wouldn't make him smile. Useless chitchat she didn't excel at. So instead she remained silent, giving him moral support by just being present. He held the ridiculous pink bunny in his one hand crushing it in a bruising grip.

"Hey guys," Shaw turned at the sound of Donnelly's voice. She glanced at Reese who looked to be in his own little world right now as he stared the way Carter and Maddie went.

She turned and strode over to Donnelly to keep the guy back. Reese needed a moment alone. "What do you want?" she demanded.

"We have a few hours to kill before we board our plane I was wondering if you guys wanted to head to a bar and grab a few beers or something."

Shaw nodded. "Sounds good. Text us where you'll be at and we'll meet you there," she muttered.

"Oh no, I won't; I'll do that and you'll just not show up," Donnelly countered.

Shaw rolled her eyes. "Would I do that?"

"Yes," Donnelly agreed immediately.

Shaw sighed. "Maybe before this cruise but, well, you don't suck as much as I first figured. So having drinks with you won't make me want to drink a bottle of Draino first anymore."

"Oh gee thanks, Shaw." Donnelly griped. But beggars shouldn't be choosers and he had been waiting for a while for Shaw to realize he was capable at his job, and not at all as bad as she deemed him to be. At least this was sort of a stepping stone in the right direction for them.

Donnelly finally noticed that Reese was staring off into space. "Is he okay?" he asked with a motion at Reese. Judging by the rigidness in Reese's posture suggested he wasn't.

"Carter and Maddie just left. Reese is like a puppy that got left behind. Didn't help that Maddie put Carter and Reese through the wringer with the tears, the kid's tears make you want to steal a rainbow to make it all better for her. Or rob a toy store for her. And Maddie left her stuffed animal with John so he wouldn't be lonely," Shaw murmured, leaving off the heart bit. Even it had gotten to her, though she wouldn't admit it to anyone in a million years.

Donnelly winced. "Ouch, that had to hit him where it hurt."

John whirled around and all signs of his earlier anguish of watching Joss and Maddie leave were gone. Hidden away behind a veil of composure as he walked over to where they were waiting with their luggage.

"You okay Reese?" Donnelly asked.

"I'm fine." he snapped which Shaw would have on any other day or time pointed out that it didn't sound like he was fine. But common sense told her to remain quiet. "Someone said something about alcohol?" he demanded shortly as he ripped his suitcase open and put Maddie's stuffed animal inside securely.

"Yea, we have time before our flight to…"

"Let's go," John said cutting Donnelly off as he brushed past them yanking his suit case along with him, leaving them to follow him.

Shaw looked at Donnelly with a smirk. "Good news, he's next to you on the flight home." Shaw said. At first when she saw that she had been angry but now she was grateful.

"Why is that great news?"

"Well if Reese gets smashed; you'll be next to him if he needs to find that barf bag," Shaw said simply with a snicker as she jerked her suitcase forward and followed behind Reese.

"Crap, let's switch seats," Donnelly called out as he was left to follow her.


AN: I'm sorry for not giving a heads up on this chapter. Poor Maddie. She just makes you want to rip your heart out. Next chapter:

Ch 23: We Go Together Like Milk & Cookies

Thanks for reading!