Those rocket brothers on the verge
We should be careful 'cause it could burst
And we're not lonely anymore
Lonely as we were before
Rocket Brothers – Kashmir
Alaric didn't seem surprised to walk into the living room and see the vampire on his couch with a drink in his hand. Damon usually showed up without announcing himself.
"Rough day?"
He nodded, staring at his near empty glass. "You didn't get in on the lynch mob action happening over at my place?" Damon tried for humor, but it came out flat and obvious. He didn't really care. He had always preferred being the bad guy. These things sometimes happened. He just had to steer clear of the blast zone long enough for everyone to calm down.
Alaric smirked, sitting next to him. "I know better than to antagonize vampires in their own home."
Damon's eyes widened a little, still looking at the drink. "Wisdom the children of this generation should benefit from."
"They're doing what they think is right." Alaric shrugged.
"I didn't kill her." For once he was tired of everyone assuming the worst in him. He turned to search his friend's face to see if there was the same hint of fear or judgment in his eyes.
"I know." Alaric patted Damon's knee. "You wouldn't be here if you had."
Damon's hand covered his. He wondered how he hadn't burned this bridge yet. Their friendship had changed a lot, but Alaric seemed as comfortable as when everything first started between them. He thought about the bite marks he'd left along the man's torso, wondered if any scars were still there. Wondered if he had it in him to leave any new ones.
He leaned a little closer, letting their shoulders touch.
Alaric smiled. "I missed you too, buddy."
"Damon is not the monster you think he is. I understand that all of you are upset. But I need him. Which means you need him too. My brother is the only one willing to do what it takes most of the time. Okay?" Stefan looked directly at Bonnie's narrowed eyes. "I'm telling you I will handle this." He took in each one of them around the table.
"You're all still new to this world. The magic that makes most of us up," his eyes fell to Matt, "and makes up the people we care about, isn't easy. It's messy and we sometimes get it wrong. But Damon has saved all of your asses at some point. He's made a lot of hard decisions to keep the blood off of your hands. He is not heartless. Don't you fucking forget that."
Elena's hand went to Stefan's but he barely felt her touch. He believed what he was saying about his brother. He didn't know if he believed the same thing about himself.
"In this life, you're all going to need him again sometime. And when that day comes, you call, and we'll be there. So you don't get to do anything to him now."
Elena's forehead knit together and she stared at the loose hold of their hands.
Caroline bit her fingernail, looking surprised.
He smiled softly at her, knowing she was going to be around the longest. "You're my friends too. I'd do anything to protect you the same way."
She smiled brightly, letting her hand rest on the table.
Bonnie slumped back in her chair, processing whatever she was thinking. Matt seemed satisfied with a completed mission. Tyler yawned and looked at his watch.
Stefan took a firmer hold on Elena's hand, looking everyone else in the eye. "Thank you all for your concern. Now, please get out of my house."
He needed to get out. This hadn't been why he came to see his friend. Damon didn't think one attempt to get off with someone else would make him feel like setting himself on fire. His dick seemed to protest, only, in whatever the opposite direction of Alaric's body was. It was the first time his dick protested anything. Damon couldn't exactly blame it for its preferences. The hungry dark eyes of his brother watching him moving inside the girl haunted him and he could feel the phantom touch of Stefan's hands gripping his hips. So one more session on Alaric's couch was aborted because he hadn't been remotely hard, and Alaric seemed too amused to really push the matter.
If anything, sitting across from each other on the couch again with their clothes undone, drinking—because what else was there to do—had been sort of interesting. He realized that's what letting humans into his life, letting them live long enough to become friends, led to. Satisfied drinking half naked together. Shit.
"We used to be better at this, right?" Damon finally asked, finger picking over the edge of his glass.
Alaric was silent while he gathered his thoughts. Damon always appreciated that his friend chose his words carefully. After a moment Alaric finally looked up at him. "Anything was better than nothing." He elbowed Damon's arm, making the liquor slosh around.
Damon glared at him but the man gave him a meaningful grin. Right. That's what it had been about. They were each other's Hover Dam sized barriers to hold off the loneliness. Except they weren't so lonely these days.
"How is your little girlfriend?" Damon exhaled and took another drink.
Alaric's smile warmed his whole face. "She's kind of perfect. We aren't even that serious yet, but she makes me want to be, you know? I want to make her promises and keep them."
He started nodding, he had an idea of what that felt like. "Good. I'm glad you have someone you want to make happy."
Carding his other hand through his hair, he leaned against the back of the couch. He wanted to keep his promises too. The good ones. Preferably without destroying his relationship with his brother. He wanted to know how to fill that empty hollow feeling inside. Those damn teenagers in his house could go fuck themselves. He wasn't a monster; he was just a shell of a man.
Alaric sighed and leaned back against the cushion. "Have you actually talked to Stefan?"
Surprise hit Damon like a slap to the face. Alaric knew. Of course he knew. Damon narrowed his eyes at him. How the hell did he know? Damon poked a bruising finger into his ribs. "How?"
His friend leaned away from him, scowling like it should be obvious. "For your sake, you should know that you talk in your sleep."
Damon set the drink down and closed the buttons of his shirt. Alaric didn't seem upset. He did look concerned, with the kind of sincerity that reminded Damon he didn't have to hide everything from everyone. That he couldn't.
"You weren't just better than nothing." Damon said instead of any of the protests that popped in his head.
"I know." Alaric straightened himself out. "Neither were you. We just weren't forever."
How much easier his life would be if they could have been. Damon tightened his hand into a fist and tapped it against his forehead. "What is wrong with me?" Damon unclenched and wiped his hands over his face, trying to shake off the racing feeling in his pulse.
"I'm flattered you think I would know." Alaric laughed quietly.
"You're right. I need to ask someone who has known me longer." Only one person other than Stefan really fit that description. The one person who probably had a lot of answers about beginnings. Damon closed his eyes. "Oh no."
Alaric squeezed his shoulder. "Tell that bitch to go fuck off and die for me whenever you're done." Because he really was the best friend ever. "Then go talk to your brother."
Damon sighed as he pulled out his phone. "Yep."
Elena went outside to talk to Bonnie. The guys waited around the car, ready to get out of there. Only Caroline lingered behind, catching Stefan's attention to speak with him privately.
"I know what you're doing."
He started shaking his head, ready for everyone to be gone. "You all gathered yourselves here."
"But something else was happening before that." She looked hard at his skepticism. "And now you're saying goodbye."
He hesitated. Her eyes were guarded, but he saw startling understanding behind them. He barely tipped his chin, as much admission as he could manage.
"I remember that look on my dad's face. When he told us he was leaving to be with Steven."
"Caroline, I don't…"
"I can smell him on you." Her accusation was harsh, but quiet. She may have had ideas about what was going on between Stefan and Damon, but she wasn't going to say them outright.
His stomach dropped but he didn't look away. "He's my brother." Out of the corner of his eye, he saw outside where Elena and Bonnie were talking about something with very serious faces.
"And she's my best friend." She hissed in disbelief. "If you're ending things with her now, when things can actually be good between you, it is not because you and Damon are just brothers."
