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Kind of Different
With no other lead and not a single idea about where Buffy could have disappeared to, Faith, Sam and Dean concluded that the most logical thing to do would be to head back to Cleveland.
It was a solemn audience that greeted them upon arrival. Unlike last time, she school wasn't buzzing with the activity of young girls. Instead it was quiet, glum. The girls were almost silent as they hastily made their way through the corridors, and there wasn't a single smile to be found.
"Oh good, you're here," announced a relieved voice.
They all turned as one to find Giles advancing on them.
Faith shrugged. "We didn't know where else to look, so..."
"I'm glad you're here. The students will be relieved to see you." He put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed, and then nodded in greeting at the Winchesters. "We're gathering in the library if you'd care to join us?"
They nodded, and followed him down the familiar passage. Upon entering the library, they discovered a whole bunch of faces that were new from the last time Sam and Dean had visited, along with some familiar ones.
"Faith!"
A wild haired Dawn separated herself from the gang gathered around the table to wrap her arms around Faith. Faith looked awkward at the interaction, and simply patted the younger girl on the head, embarrassedly.
"I'm so glad you're here," Dawn announced, letting go.
"Uh...yeah. Me too, kid. I didn't realize you'd be here, though."
"Well, Giles told me to stay in England 'cause there was nothing I could do here and he was all like 'concentrate on your studies and try not to worry' and I was like 'how the hell can I not worry when my sister is missing?'. You know?"
"Yeah, I know." She looked away from Dawn and peered about the room, exhaling in relief hen she saw the person she was looking for. "Hi, Robin."
He'd been stood back, as if afraid to approach her. But when she greeted him he stepped forwards, gripping her shoulder much like Giles had done. "Welcome back, Faith."
"You too."
She really was genuinely happy to see him. He was the only person in the world she'd ever have labelled a 'boyfriend'. Even when their relationship had come to an end, he'd still continued to be a sound and stabilizing influence in her life.
Gesturing towards Sam and Dean, she said, "You haven't met these guys, have you? Sam and Dean Winchester. They're hunters. Good ones."
Robin shook each of their hands in turn. "I've actually heard a lot about you." He shot a sneaky glance in Dawn's direction. "She rambles a lot."
Dawn poked him in the arm. "Do not." She turned to Sam and Dean. "Robin was head of Sunnydale High. Until it got all crater lovin'."
The library doors suddenly slammed open, and all turned to watch as two grumpy looking men walked in, each sporting what looked to be a red collar around their necks.
"Are these really necessary?" one of them asked, tugging at it.
"You could always take it off if you wanted, Spike," Willow piped up. "Of course, you'd turn into a bit dusty pile of ash the second you did, but that's your choice."
"I don't see why the spells in this place affect me anyway. I have a soul."
"You're still a demon."
"The last time I wore something 'round my neck, the town went boom. So excuse me if I'm a tad tetchy, right?"
"Shut up, Spike," his companion commanded with a long suffering sigh. He roved his eyes over the group, stopping when he spotted the man who had been sitting with Robin. "Gunn, when did you get here?"
"About a half an hour ago with Wood and Dawn." He stood up and moved over to slap him on the arm. "It's good to see you again, Angel. It's been a while."
"Yeah, too long."
Glancing quickly at Sam and Dean, Faith noticed that they were looking confused at the whole situation and very out of place. "Oh right, yeah. More intro's. So this guy's Charles Gunn. He's helping Robin out in England with Dawn. And these two idiots are Spike and Angel. They're vampires. Everyone, this is Dean and Sam-"
"Whoa whoa whoa!" Dean interrupted. "Back it up there a minute. Did you just say vampires?"
"Yeah. Oh, they're like, good vamps."
"Vampires as in stinkin' evil fiends who suck the blood of innocent people?"
"Hey!" Spike protested. "We're evil, not feelingless! That stings!"
Angel rolled his eyes at both of them. "We're not evil. We have souls."
"Vampires with souls?" Sam was immediately intrigued. "Are there a lot of you out there?"
"Nope. Just the two of us."
"Yeah, we're unique!" Spike added smugly.
Giles huffed frustratedly. "As fascinating as none of this is, we really should be getting down to business!"
Those standing up all took a seat around the table, feeling a lot like naughty school children.
"It's nice to see everyone again," David Chan addressed the table. "I only wish it could be under better circumstances." Everyone nodded, and he continued. "I've received reports back from all our slayers in the North area – there's been no sign. Winona did hear of a blonde woman being forced into a cab and followed the lead, but it wasn't Buffy."
Willow looked horrified. "Did she help the woman?"
"Of course."
Giles nodded sadly at the lack of information. "Willow, anything from your side of things?"
"I've tried every spell I can think of and nothing. Even the coven can't get a hint of her."
"We have the younger girls getting back to their lessons," Andrew added. When Faith looked at him questioningly he shrugged. "I passed my watcher's test. I was gonna surprise Buffy with it when she came home, but..."
"You still can," Kennedy spoke up, her expression uncharacteristically soft. "When we get her back."
Giles cleared his throat and rubbed his forehead, trying to get rid of the headache that seemed to have decided to take up permanent residence in his brain. "That's very good. Lessons will keep the girls occupied, and they need something to distract them right now. Which brings me onto my next topic of conversation..."
Vi put her hand up, looking embarrassed. "Are you talking about the slayer/watcher ball?" He nodded, and she took that as her sign to go on. "Okay, I booked the Gilving Hotel to hold it. It's big enough and only a couple of miles from here, so it's practically perfect. We did want to hold it here at the school, but the hall just isn't big enough for everyone so-"
"Slow down just a second, cowgirl!" Faith interrupted, holding up her hand. "Are you seriously wasting time here planning that stupid ball? When Buffy ismissing? What the hell?"
"Yeah!" Dean agreed. "I second that hell!"
Giles neatly folded his hands and laid them down on the table carefully, before peering over the top of his glasses at Faith. It was when he was at his calmest that Faith knew he was about to pop, so she sat back and prepared to let him speak.
"At this point in time, it is imperative that we make sure that the watchers and slayers know they are together, that they have to stick with each other. Buffy is a symbol to everyone, and with her gone and in possible danger, none of them are feeling all too safe. We're hoping that by continuing on with the preparations, the girls will feel stabilized and will realize that they aren't alone. We want to rebuild their confidence. I want to find Buffy as much as the rest of you, but we have to consider the girls as well."
"Yeah, I guess you're right," Faith admitted. "Sorry, G."
"Why don't you take Buffy's room," Faith suggested to Dean, as they tiredly trudged into the apartment, hours later. "Sam'll have to take the couch...if that's cool?"
Sam nodded. "That's fine."
"Great. We can get something to eat and then maybe patrol or something. Or sleep. Whatever."
"Food sounds great."
They moved towards the kitchen where they found Dawn and Andrew, discussing the meeting.
"I just can't believe Spike is alive!" Dawn announced. "And that Willow and Giles knew about it! Buffy is gonna be so pissed that he didn't tell her when she gets home."
"If she gets home," Andrew mumbled sadly.
"When," Dean corrected sternly. "When she gets home. Don't you ever give up on her."
Andrew nodded bravely. "I'll try."
Glad to finally be alone, Dean locked himself away in Buffy's room later that night, tossing his bag to the floor and slowly spinning around, his eyes eagerly taking in every detail. It had an unused feel to it, but there was a definite hint of her scent in the air.
He stepped over to the dresser, opening and peering into her drawers unashamedly. One was filled with makeup and crap, another with underwear.
He frowned and pushed aside the underwear.
There was a stake hidden in there.
Buffy kept a stake hidden in her underwear drawer.
Dean stumbled backwards, falling down when his legs hit the edge of the bed. Suddenly, the last shred of control he had been clinging onto ever since Buffy had vanished shattered, and hot, embarrassing tears began to leak from his eyes. Not only that, but loud sobs escaped his throat. Sobs! He covered his mouth to muffle the sound, but had to remove it when the need to take it big, choking gasps of air became too much.
It took him a full three minutes to compose himself enough to stand and remove the stake from the drawer. He slipped it into his pocket, and glanced around her mirror to where she had tacked photographs of herself and her friends. Lots of Faith and Dawn and Andrew, and plenty more of the others from the school. His favourite was of her and Dawn with an older woman – their mother, he guessed, if the resemblance was anything to go by. Buffy looked so happy in the picture. So happy and young, with eyes filled with secrets. He plucked it down and moved back over to the bed.
He fell asleep that night with his nose buried in a pillow that smelled of Buffy's hair, a stake in his hand, and a picture laying next to hiss face.
The world was a different place without Buffy. Quiet, lonely, joyless.
Faith patrolled all night, every night, and hunted down vampire nests during the day. She was exhausted, unfocused and careless, but determined to kill every last demon she could get her hands on, no matter what anyone tried to say to get her to rest.
It had been Buffy's job before. Back when Faith was swanning off by herself and leaving her best friend alone. It had been Buffy's job. And now it was hers.
Andrew, on the other hand, simply drifted, looking sad and lost and lonely.
He even seemed to have lost the will to flirt with Dean.
"She was the best non-evil friend I ever had," he confided in Sam, when Sam had tried to comfort him.
Dawn researched.
And then she researched.
And then she researched and researched and researched.
She refused to eat and sleep. She wasn't even sure what she was looking for, but still she researched.
"Why don't you get some sleep, kid?" Faith suggested.
Everything about Dawn was dull when she responded. "I'm fine."
"Just a nap, or something to eat. You're wasting away here, and you know Buffy wouldn't want that."
"Really, I'm fine. I have to research...it's all I'm good at."
Damn. Faith had never been good at this touchy feely 'make you feel better' nonsense. That had always been Buffy's forte. Maybe she could go and get Sam...who was currently at the school. Double damn. "Hey, don't be like that," she said awkwardly. "You're good at other stuff too."
"Like what?"
"Um-"
Dawn spun around in her chair, a fierce look on her face. "I'm not a good fighter like Buffy is! Or a good leader like she is. Or any of the things that make her great. She's always taken care of me, even when I was being a totally selfish brat. I mean, she friggin' died for me! And I'd...I'd do the same if it meant getting her back."
Faith knelt down before her and gripped her knees. "You and me both know she's never want that. Ever! So don't even be saying things like that. And if you keep on going the way you're going, you're gonna end up seriously ill. And Buff would totally kick my ass if I let that happen. So get some sleep, otherwise I'm just gonna tie you to the bed and make you."
"Kinky."
"Now!"
They'd been back in Cleveland for three days when somebody buzzed the apartment.
"Who's there," Dawn asked with a sigh through the intercom.
"Dawn?" came a male voice. "Is that you? Buzz me up."
A long, loud squeal brought the rest of the apartment out of their various hiding places.
"What's going on?" Dean demanded. "Is that the alarm?"
"Lewis is here!" Dawn exclaimed, clapping her hands. "He's here, he's here, he's here!"
"Who the hell is Lewis?"
Before she could answer, there was a knock on the apartment door and she ran to open it, throwing herself into the arms of the breathless boy waiting on the other side.
"I know you told me not to come," he acknowledged in an Irish accent. "but I just had to. I couldn't let you go through all this alone."
"I'm not alone, doofus! But I am so, so glad you're here!"
"Seriously, who is this guy?" Dean questioned. "And when did drop into a teen romcom?"
Dawn pulled Lewis into the apartment and closed the door behind them. "Guys, this is Lewis."
"No kidding," Faith said dryly. "'Cause we totally didn't get that when you yelled it in our faces."
"Lewis, this is Faith and Andrew – I live with them here. And this is Buffy's boyfriend, Dean, and his brother, Sam. Guys, Lewis is my best friend. We met on campus."
"And he's here because...?"
"I came because I was going crazy back in England knowing that Dawn was over here probably going out of her mind worrying about her missing sister," Lewis answered helpfully. "I couldn't not come."
Dean instantly warmed up to the kid – who was quite blatantly in love with Dawn, although he'd hedge a bet that she was completely oblivious. And he'd flown half way across the world to be there for her. He had to respect that.
"Lewis knows about Buffy?" Faith asked suspiciously. "Just how much else does he know?"
Dawn looked bashful at this, and in that moment she looked so much like Buffy that Dean felt like his stomach had just dropped right out.
"Uh...pretty much everything. But it's cool! I promise. Robin Gunn totally checked him out and gave him the whole secrecy speech. He even patrolled once or twice."
Lewis nodded eagerly. "One time I almost got eaten by a vampire. It was all very exciting."
Faith shook her head. "Fine. But I'll be having words with Robin tomorrow about who he's letting in his little club. So you must be tired, huh? Long flight and all."
"Yeah. I came straight here from the airport. In my eagerness to get here I didn't even think about finding a place to stay..."
She shrugged. "Stay here. Everyone else is. You can sleep...uh..."
"In my room?" Dawn suggested.
Faith scoffed and folded her arms. "Yeah right. Like Buffy wouldn't stab me again if I said yes to that."
"God, dirty mind much? I didn't mean in actual bed with me! I meant on the floor! It's not like there's anywhere else he could crash. And besides, I'm not a kid. I do know how to be responsible, you know."
Lewis blushed, looking like he wished he could be anywhere else in the world. "I can find another-"
"Nah," Faith butted in. "Dawn's right. She's not a kid no more. Just do me a favour, yeah? If you're gonna do the dirty deed, make sure to wrap it up."
"Oh my God, Faith! You are so embarrassing! Like me and Lewis would ever do that! I mean, ew! We're just friends." She didn't seem to notice how Lewis' face dropped at her words, but Dean sure did. "Come on, Lewis. I'll get you some blankets."
"Hold up a sec," Dean stopped her. "Dawn, you go ahead and sort out those blankets. Me and Lewis are just gonna go have a little chat in the kitchen."
"A chat about what?"
"About food. Go."
"Whatever." And she ambled off, grumbling about always being told what to do.
Everybody else disbanded back to what they had been doing before the disturbance, and Lewis followed Dean into the kitchen, looking a little scared. "You know, I actually ate at the airport, so..."
"Why don't you take a seat, Leon," Dean suggested, injecting a hint of menace into his words.
"Actually, it's Lewis."
"Seat!"
"Okay," Lewis squeaked.
"So," Dean started, sitting opposite him. "How long have you been in love with Dawn?"
Lewis' eyes widened and his cheeks flushed. "What?"
Dean sighed and rubbed his forehead, his face softening. "Look, I really don't wanna be doing this Hannah Montanna moment any more than you do. Frankly, it's just embarrassing. For both of us. But Buffy's not here to watch out over Dawn so I'm gonna do it. How long?"
"A while." Lewis dropped his face into his hands.
"Right...okay. And you haven't told her because...?"
"Because she's crazy over some other guy. Obviously."
"Obviously." He nodded slowly. "Now that I think about it, I do remember her rambling on about some totally cute teeny bopper when she came to us at Christmas."
"Yeah, that'd be Bailey. Total idiot. I've no idea how he even landed a place in uni. They probably only let him in because he's pretty."
"Okay, first of all – drop the bitterness. It's ugly. Second – Dawn's a smart kid. She'll get over her little crush eventually and if this guy really is a douche, she'll realize it."
"And then you think she might fall for me?"
"Maybe, I don't know. I don't even know you. Or her, really. But if she does go and decide you're the one she wants to ramble about, you better be good to her, okay? Because if I find out you hurt her, I will hunt your ass down and feed it to a pack of hungry demons. Okay?"
"I'd never hurt her. Ever."
"Well good. 'Cause seriously, there'd be maiming involved."
"You're quite a scary man, you know that?"
"You should meet Buffy. Makes me look like a kitten."
Sam glanced down at his watch.
3 am.
3 am and he still couldn't sleep, just like every other night since he'd arrived back in Cleveland. No wonder the bags under his eyes were practically black as midnight.
He pursed his lips together as an annoying tear slipped from his eye.
"Sam?"
He jumped at the sound of his brother's voice, and hastily wiped the tear away. He hadn't even heard Dean leave Buffy's room. Composing his face, he turned to Dean as he sat down in the armchair next to the couch. "What's up?"
Dean peered at Sam. "Have you been crying?
"No!" he protested harshly. He noticed that Dean's own eyes were rimmed with red. "Have you?"
"No."
They sat in companionable silence for a while, and Sam tried to pretend that Dean wasn't observing him.
"What?" he asked finally.
Dean shrugged. "Nothing. I was just thinking...you love her too, don't you?"
"Buffy?"
"Yeah."
Sam nodded. "Yeah, I do. I mean, not like you do. I love her like...like a sister."
"But you had a little crush on her in the beginning though, dintcha?" Dean teased.
It was so good to see Dean doing something so carefree as teasing that Sam couldn't help but smile. "Maybe."
"Ha! I so knew it."
"Come on, man! She's sexy as hell and can kick some serious ass! What man wouldn't?"
"True, true."
Sam's smile slowly faded and he looked at Dean with serious eyes. "We're gonna find her, you know that, right?"
"I know. I know because he have to find her. She's my future, little bro. She's everything."
Sam had never seen his brother so open, so vulnerable. What was it about her that made him this way? What was it about her that made people different...better? He wished he could fix this. "Why don't we try calling Dad? He could help."
"No, I don't wanna call Dad. Besides, he probably wouldn't pick up even if we did."
Dean let himself back into Buffy's room just under and hour later. He and Sam had talked some more and, crazy as it was, he thought he might actually be able to get some sleep now.
Before he climbed back into bed, he fished his cellphone out of his pocket and hit speed dial. He wasn't surprised when it went straight to answer-phone.
"Hey, Dad. I know I've left you at least a dozen messages these past few days, but...I really need you right now..."
Things were no better at the school than they were at the apartment.
Giles walked the halls, as mechanical as a robot. When people talked, he barely listened.
At least last time when Buffy had been dead, he had known. And now, it was the not knowing that was killing him.
When Willow tried to talk to him, all he would say was that he'd succeeded in failing Buffy once again, and there was nothing anyone could say or do to persuade him otherwise.
When she wasn't trying to help Giles through his funky issues, Willow was exhausting herself casting every spell she could get her head around – minus the crazy, black eyed turning variety.
Kennedy had tried and failed to get her to stop and rest many a time, and had later taken on the 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em' approach. If she was being totally honest, it was only thirty percent about trying to find Buffy, and seventy percent about making sure that Willow had somebody to lean on.
Xander was taking an entirely different approach.
Instead of finding ways to aid the rest of the group in getting Buffy back, he was busying himself by building her a special training room for when she did get back.
Dean watched him hammer furiously, a look of denial hidden in his eyes. He didn't like that look. It was the look of somebody who had given up hope, but was refusing to acknowledge that he had.
"We lost her once before," Xander spoke up, feeling eyes upon him.
"When she died?"
"Yeah...when she died." He stopped hammering and took a long glug from his bottle of water, before offering it to Dean. "We couldn't cope without her then. And I'm not saying we couldn't now – a lot's changed since then. But...we just don't want to. Giles is right. She's a symbol. When people who know her think about her, they think of hope, and freedom, and strength. She's amazing."
He picked the hammer back up and got back down to work. Nodding, Dean joined him.
"Dude, seriously! Stop staring at me," Dean demanded, fed up of the mean glares Angel kept shooting his way. "I know I'm pretty, but..."
The two of them and Spike and Giles were riding out of town to meet up with a contact of Giles'. Giles had warned them that it would probably be a waste of time, but at this point, they were grasping at straws.
"Buffy's scent is all over you," Angel replied by way of explanation.
Spike rolled his eyes. "No kidding. He's staying in her apartment. Idiot."
"Okay, creepy stalker, why are you sniffing me?" Dean took his eyes off the road to peer at Angel in disgust.
"Angelcakes is all jealous," Spike told him.
In the passenger seat, Giles softly banged his head against the window, wondering for the nineteenth time why he hadn't just driven by himself.
"You're so immature, Spike." Angel huffed and folded his arms. "And like you're not jealous."
"Maybe a little," Spike admitted, shrugging. "But the overriding emotion here is happiness that Buffy has finally found a decent human – and by human I don't mean a big army boy pillock – to love, and one who loves her back." And under his breath he added, "Immature my arse."
"Man, I gotta tell you – never thought I'd be sitting in some bar sharing beers with a vamp," Dean mused out loud, later that night.
"And I never thought I'd meet a boyfriend of Buffy's I didn't want to decapitate," Spike responded. "So there you go."
They both smirked and clinked bottles.
"Cheers."
