Lipana: I am aware of that, but Cagalli, as she'll soon reveal, considers the PLANTs to be ruled by a military dictatorship in all but name, so she thinks of ZAFT and PLANT as one and the same. If any character seems to think the same way it's a mistake, I'm pushing Cagalli's POV on them which shouldn't be happening. I'll make sure that's not happening. ^^;
Peloponsee: Thank you for the corrections on Heliopolis. I don't have a sourcebook on me for quick consultation so mistakes like that happen. ^^; I'll try to implement them ASAP.
As for Kira being involved, one thing he kept is his ability with technology. Lord Uzumi noticed that. Kira is also far less rebellious than Cagalli is, so Kira would actually voice his concerns to Uzumi and ask for permission for investigating and stuff instead of going behind Uzumi's back like Cagalli did. I thought about how the trading places would affect Kira just as much as it would affect Cagalli.
littlemssstrawberry: I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far. I'll try to keep updating once a week. ^^
There won't be any "bonus" chapters from here on out (unless there's a reason). I'll try to update on Monday but due to personal circumstances a chapter may not show up until Tuesday or Wednesday.
I hope the story remains enjoyable.
Chapter Five: Learn to Fly
I activated the Phase Shift Armor, and hit the acceleration. This was going to be a really rough battle, as it was three on one. I had the GUNDAM, but they had the numbers. If I wasn't careful, I could be overwhelmed at a moment's notice.
Suddenly, my console beeped. One of the ZAFT Mobile Suits was hailing me.
Do I dare bite?
I decided I should, as much as I didn't want to see the face of a pilot I was going to have to kill. Maybe I could find some kind of weakness for the pilot and his group if I answered. Or maybe it was Athrun, even though he was likely still with the Aegis. Maybe he had come back, I couldn't give up hope.
I turned on the visual, and suddenly I saw a handsome ZAFT pilot. His eyes widened immediately. "God damn it, I was beaten by a Natural civilian?"
An evil smirk cut its way across my face, and the terror in me left a bit. I knew exactly how to play this.
"That's right. A Natural who's never flown a Mobile Suit before beat your ass. And here I thought Coordinators were supposed to be tough. What kinda screw-ups did they do on your genetics, huh?"
"Shut up!" Immediately, the Mobile Suit started shooting at me. Unfortunately for him, I was so far away I could easily dodge the shots.
"Maybe they forgot to modify your eyes. You couldn't hit a barn with that barrage."
"Enough of your insolence, Natural! Face me!"
"So you have so little confidence in yourself that you can't charge me, you need me to charge you? Wow, just . . . wow."
"Can you just shut up?" He fired several wild barrages as he began chasing me around the colony.
A new male voice entered the channel. "Miguel, the pilot is clearly taunting you. Now fall back into formation, Matthew and I need your help in facing the legged ship."
Legged ship? I quickly realized they meant the Archangel. The ship was their primary target, not me.
Miguel, for his part, said "Let me kill the Natural, Olor. Then I'll assist."
"That's a direct order, Miguel."
I knew the Archangel would have an easier time which just two Mobile Suits instead of three. Plus, it would be easier on me too. I needed Miguel all by his lonesome, and then pick off Olor and Matthew.
So I taunted him again. "Aw, the whiddle Coordinator needs his big bwother to tell him what to do. How adorable!"
"For God's sake, enough!"
Miguel fired at me wildly again, and his shots were easy dodges. We flew in a general circle around the Archangel with Miguel firing in my general direction but scoring no hits.
"Wow," I said. "Your parents must've paid the lowest bidder for your so-called enhancement."
"Stop it!"
"Seriously, what are you trying to do? Bite my kneecaps off?"
"What the hell does that even mean?"
"There's this concept called 'banter'. I'm joking with you. Did they forget to install your funny bone too?"
"I . . .uh . . . arrrgh!"
"Cool! I made a Coordinator devolve into a caveman!"
"EEEEEEAAAAARRRRRAAAAAGGGGGGH HHHH!"
Miguel discarded his rifle after one final spray of wild shots. He drew his heavy sword, and charged me, bellowing all kinds of unintelligible noises as he took futile swings at the Strike.
I heard Mu's voice then. "Uh, princess, while that conversation was mildly diverting, your opponent's wild firing has done damage to the support shaft."
That was actually a bad thing. The support shaft was what held Heliopolis together. It could take some abuse, but if it crumbled, the whole colony would collapse on itself, if it weren't for an emergency disintegration feature. But who knew if the disintegration would work?
"Well, he's drawn his sword. That any better?" I asked, as I turned the Strike to the right to avoid another lunge.
"We can't afford to have you waste your time with him all day. We could use some backup in front of the bridge, the other two GINNs are getting too close. Take care of your opponent and give us some help."
"Give me a second. He's rushing me again," I said. I was filled with all kinds of confidence then, but the moment I actually attempted to block Miguel, I realized a big flaw in my plan.
Taunting him had made him lose his cool, which was what I wanted, but had worked him into a frenzy, which I hadn't. His movements were so fast they were almost a blur. I could barely block each blow he gave me, and out of the corner of my eye, I realized my energy level had already dipped to eighty percent.
Suddenly, much to my amazement, his sword arm sparked, and suddenly fell limp. He had pushed his GINN beyond the machine's limits, and some wire had snapped in the GINN's right arm. The GINN was practically helpless.
His face was still displayed on my screen, and he looked at me with a helpless glance.
I just smiled. "Looks like they just don't make Mobile Suits like they used to."
"Do you ever shut up, boy?" he asked me, completely exasperated.
The irrational anger re-emerged again. "Did you just call me a boy?"
Miguel just stared at me. "What, you'd prefer 'young man'?"
"I'm a girl, dumbass!"
Miguel made a growling noise. "Oh, I don't give a damn who or what you are! You're dead, kid!"
And then with his GINN's sole working arm, he ripped the sword out of the dead hand and charged right at me.
Seeing a clear opening, I rushed him, easily dodging his swipe in the process.
I won't forget his scream as the sword cut the GINN, and likely the pilot himself, in half.
Even as I connected I was already regretting my decision to go for the kill. My irrational, immature rage had subsided enough for me to realize I was about to kill him. Which was something I didn't necessarily want to do. I had already beaten him, his machine was crippled. I could've easily let him fly away.
But it was too late. Much too late.
I'm not going to type out his scream. It's not really describable. It's this mixture of horror and pain and pleading and . . .
My actions have consequences. It was something not really driven home until I was in control of a sixty-something-ton behemoth that could level a building without any effort.
Go figure.
Up until that point, the anger I felt when someone called me a boy or a man had never done anything other than cause a few fights and, ironically, spread the tomboy reputation I had. No matter what I did, no matter what moisturizer I applied to my face, no matter how long I grew my hair, no matter what clothes I wore, I was always mistaken for a boy. And I never understood why, and still can't understand why.
Maybe I'll never understand. And maybe I'll never gain complete control over my immature anger.
But the consequences of such irrational anger were here. I killed a man over it. Disproportionate retribution at its finest.
The Mobile Suit exploded behind me, and Miguel's horrible scream did not stop until it was suddenly cut off. It replayed in my mind immediately for the next few seconds, over and over, echoing faster and slower all at once as it burned itself into my mind.
It took me a few seconds for me to realize what I had done. I wondered if it had been real. That I had really killed someone, especially as the reason why was because of a mistake many people made.
My adrenaline was so high, though, that the memory was hazy, faint. I kinda wish it would've stayed that way, lost in a murky fog like a lot of memories both bad and good.
I noticed the battle with the Archangel, and I saw that the Archangel was severely undermanned in the anti-aircraft department. In any normal encounter, the ship could've fended off two GINNs fairly easily. But this was different. There just wasn't enough firepower. The GINNs could dodge the Archangel the same way I had dodged Miguel.
"I need the Aile Pack," I said.
I heard Kira's voice, surprisingly. "I'm sending it right now, Cagalli."
"Kira? What are you doing?"
"The battle will be more efficient if I took over Mobile Suit duties. Pal has his own job, he can't take care of you and his own duty," Kira said. "The Pack's on its way. I'll inform the crew to get the Sword recharged ASAP."
"Thank you," I said, and I disengaged the Phase Shift armor to switch. The Aile Pack launched from the Archangel and reached me in seconds, and I performed the switch. Kira's O.S. was really working nicely, I was able to get the Aile installed with ease.
I flew over towards the front of the ship, where these "Matthew" and "Olor" people were still engaged in battle. They didn't seem to notice me. Maybe they were so absorbed in their own battle they hadn't noticed that I had killed Miguel.
I took aim at one of the GINNs and fired.
I realized, much too late, that my aim had been off.
Instead of killing the GINN, I blew off both of its legs instead.
The GINN immediately turned around and took aim at me. Completely panicking, I fired a wild barrage at the GINN. Somehow, one of the shots hit it and the GINN exploded in midair.
Problem was, the other GINN knew I was there now.
He drew his sword and came after me the moment after I had shot down the second GINN. I immediately flew away and fired at it, but either I was a bad shot or my calibration was off because I wasn't scoring any hits.
Even though he couldn't hear me, I screamed "Stay away from me!"
My confidence I had gained from fighting Miguel had evaporated. Now I was scared. I could not score a hit on him and he rushed me at will. The more I missed, the more overwhelmed I felt. I had beaten Miguel through a combination of my mouth and his bad luck. The other guy I had killed through surprise. This fight, though, was fair.
He was not talking to me, he wasn't playing any games with me. He was just focused on his task, which was killing me. Like a true professional.
I heard Kira's voice. "Cagalli, calm down! You've already wasted half of your energy pack! You lose your Phase Shift here, you're done for!"
"What do I do then?" I wailed.
Murrue entered the conversation. "I'm getting all of the gunners to aim at the Mobile Suit. Just concentrate on evasion. We have your back, Cagalli."
"A demonstration would be nice!" I shouted.
The GINN came right at me again and I barely got the Strike out of the way in time. The GINN wound up slicing the support shaft, and did some heavy damage to it. However, the GINN had also rammed the support shaft to an extent, and it had been knocked off balance. I realized it was momentarily vulnerable.
"Damn it, die!"
That's what I think I said. There's varying accounts of that. Kira and Mu said I just screamed. Murrue told me I said something much saltier. Natarle, when I asked, just smiled coyly and said she wasn't listening to me "bellow like a dinosaur", in her words.
I yelled something, in any case, and let loose another barrage right at the Mobile Suit as it tried to turn around to face me. At this close range, there was no time to evade.
I hit the Mobile Suit multiple times and it exploded . . . right next to the damaged support shaft.
Immediately, the support shaft began to buckle, and explosions continued down the shaft as it started to fall apart.
I heard Natarle's voice. "The GUNDAM Aegis is approaching our sector! Watch out!"
"What?" I raised my rifle. My energy was down to thirty-eight percent. I could not hold it off for long.
Murrue interjected. "Why are they sending the Aegis out already? They've barely had it for a few hours!"
"It doesn't matter," Mu said. "Cagalli, get your weapon ready. I'll try to see if the Zero is repaired enough for me to give you backup."
The Aegis, however, flew right in front of me. "Too late," I said.
The Aegis froze, however, and did not shoot.
Explosions were continuing all along the shaft. I heard Murrue's voice. "Cagalli, get back here! Heliopolis is at alert level ten! That means they're starting the disintegration procedure! This whole area is going to become a debris field!"
Before I could answer, the Aegis hailed me. I knew full well who was trying to speak to me, and I didn't want to answer.
"Just a minute, Lieutenant," I said, and finally, I activated the public channel.
The visual came up, and there was Athrun, suited up just the way he had been down on the ground.
Athrun's eyes widened as he saw me. "I didn't want it . . . to be you. I nearly didn't come out here because I was afraid of this being the truth."
"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked.
Explosions were happening all over the colony as the disintegration procedure began. All over the colony, lifeboats were being launched, sending them all towards Orb waters and land on Earth. In seconds, Heliopolis would cease to exist.
Athrun did not answer me directly. "Those were my friends, Cagalli. Miguel, Matthew, Olor . . . they were my friends. And you killed them."
"I'm sorry, but it wasn't like they gave me a choice," I replied.
Athrun again didn't directly answer. He just bit his lip and asked "Cagalli, why? Why are you inside that thing?"
He would have understood if I had said it was to protect Prince Kira. It was an understandable answer. A good one. The first one that popped into my head. But then I had second thoughts.
Like I mentioned, I was a political-science major. And I was smart enough to know I could not divulge that Kira was on the Archangel.
As far as I knew, Orb was still neutral, and the only forces the ZAFT had attempted to outright kill were Earth Alliance forces. This was going to become a major diplomatic crisis, but Lord Uzumi was notoriously skilled at political maneuvering. He would find a way to keep Orb neutral, as long as the ZAFT didn't know the EA had Kira in their possession.
If they knew Kira was on-board the Archangel, it would send precisely the wrong signals. Assumptions could be made that Orb was full-on collaborating with the Earth Alliance instead of an independent company like Morgenroete. That would mean Orb was no longer neutral and had chosen a side. Even Lord Uzumi would not be able to keep Orb from becoming yet another target of the ZAFT.
Even though Athrun had been a childhood friend, and my first kiss, I could not tell him that Kira was on-board. He could have changed greatly in five years, he had already changed enough to be a ZAFT special-forces soldier. I could not trust him. And even if he were to keep damning information a secret, who knew who could be listening in on his conversations?
So I said something else. Something selfish, but something that I hoped would still be convincing to anyone on the ZAFT who could be listening.
"I am fighting for my survival, Athrun," I said.
"Survival?" Athrun asked, completely dumbfounded.
"That's right. Survival. I need shelter. All of the other lucky citizens got to make it to a lifeboat. I ran to the Earth Alliance to find shelter. And guess what? I have to protect my shelter. That's why I'm in here, Athrun," I said.
Athrun's eyes shimmered from behind that visor. "Cagalli, the ZAFT could give you shelter. I promise, I'll vouch for you. I still care-"
Before he could finish, Heliopolis' destruction entered its most brutal phase.
The entire colony separated into dozens of pieces, large and small, all at once.
Air rushed out of the center of the colony, where Athrun and I were. Immediately, the vacuum became so powerful both Athrun and I got pulled away in opposite directions.
I screamed as I was pulled away from Athrun, pulled away from the Archangel.
I heard Athrun wail my name as he was pulled away into the debris field being created.
All around me, little lights flashed as lifeboats disconnected from the crumbling colony. It left the impression of so many lightning bugs flying away after their home had been disturbed, and they were taking off into the night sky.
It was surreal, dream-like, mesmerizing . . . or it would have been if I wasn't so completely terrified of what was happening to me. Nothing I could do would keep the Strike near Athrun or the Archangel.
Miguel's tortured scream entered my mind again as I floated completely out of control into deep space. I closed my eyes, and tried to forget it, but the scream just seemed to become louder the longer my eyes were shut.
It became clear to me that I would never forget that scream as long as I lived.
Control slowly returned to me, and thankfully, the shattering of the colony meant I didn't hit a piece of debris big enough to cripple the GUNDAM. That would've been really bad because I was not wearing a space suit.
My home since high school was crumbling apart. And nothing would stop it.
And now Athrun was gone, yet again, haunting me like a ghost. Now I see him, now I don't.
But that wasn't my main thought at the time.
I thought about my taunts at Miguel, which had caused considerable damage to the shaft. Miguel's wild firing had started the shaft's destruction, but it wasn't the end. Even that other GINN damaging the shaft with a sword strike hadn't been the final blow. The colony was still holding up even after the GINN's energy sword abuse.
The end was me.
I had provoked Miguel into firing so wildly he had damaged the shaft and colony walls in a rampage.
But that paled in comparison to what I had done.
In the end, it had been me who destroyed the support shaft.
I was responsible for Heliopolis' destruction.
