Hey everyone! I'm sorry for such a long update time, my life has been crazy since the new year. So here's an update.


Love that once hung on the wall

Used to mean something, but now it means nothing

The echoes are gone in the hall

But I still remember, the pain of December

Oh, there isn't one thing left you could say…

I'm sorry it's too late

I'm breaking free from these memories

I let it go and now I know

A brand new life is down this road

And when it's right, you always know

So this time I won't let go

-"Let Me Go" Avril Lavigne Ft Chad Kroeger

Santa Barbara: 2019

"Shawn you need to calm down," Her hand was on his bare chest and she could feel how fast his heart rate was, "Before you have a heart attack. Calm down." She turned from looking at the door and looked at him. Shawn closed his eyes and tried to regulate his breathing. It was hard to do with an impounding sense of doom. Shawn jumped when there was a loud knock on the door.

"Daddy!" Shawn heard Zuri run in but she was quickly caught by Juliet before he could see her.

"Sweetie don't yell," Juliet's voice was soft, "Daddy's not doing so well right now and we need to be quiet, okay?"

"Okay…" Zuri responded glancing at her dad. "Can I stay in here? It's scary outside." Juliet nodded and helped her sit in a chair near the bed.

"Where are grandma and grandpa?" Shawn turned to look at Zuri.

"I don't know," Zuri shrugged.

"They're probably with Carlton trying to figure out what's going on." Juliet stepped into the doorway of the room. The red emergency lights had turned on which illuminated the chaos of the room. Nurses were running all over making sure patients were alright. Juliet could hear screaming from all over; now she could see why Zuri was scared. Juliet shut the door to keep the panicked atmosphere out of the little oasis of calm.

"What's happening out there?" Juliet took a seat next to Zuri before looking at Shawn.

"Running around. The generator has kicked in which is good, but if the person who knocked out the power is still in the building; things could go downhill fast." Shawn nodded not having expected anything less.

"Is someone trying to hurt people?" Zuri looked frightened and Juliet felt bad for what she'd just said.

"There's nothing to worry about sweetie," Shawn told Zuri. "Everything will be okay; the hospital just probably forgot to pay their electric bill." Juliet smiled lightly at Shawn's attempt to calm his daughter.

Zuri giggled, "Hospitals forget stuff?"

"Oh all the time. That's why paperwork is always getting lost, there's so much to do here it's hard to keep track of everything." Shawn explained. Zuri gave a nod of understanding. Juliet was surprised to see how well Shawn was able to take care of the situation; years before he would have been eager to figure out what was going on. Even if he was in a full body cast the old Shawn would have hobbled out into the panic. The new Shawn didn't move a muscle. Juliet stood up and placed her hand over Shawn's chest.

"Take deep breathes; you're still going pretty fast." Her hand moved to his forehead and she sighed when she felt the heat radiating off him. "You have a fever." She said.

"Great," Shawn responded beginning to resume his attempt at slowing down his heart. He closed his eyes and continued to take long deep breaths. Juliet walked into the joined bathroom to wet a cloth before placing it on Shawn's forehead.

"This won't cool you down much but it should help." Juliet bit her lip nervously hoping Zuri wasn't able to see the seriousness of the situation. A knock at the door made them all jump.

"Ahhh!" Zuri let out a loud scream as a dark figure entered the room.

"Shut it kid!" A gruff voice yelled back.

"Carlton!" Juliet scolded gently pulling Zuri away from the door.

"What?!" He met Juliet's glare, "Whatever… The lights will be back on soon. Turns out some idiot janitor bumped into the fuse box and caused the thing to blow." Carlton explained.

"That's it?" Shawn patted Zuri's back as she leaned her head on his knee.

Carlton put his hands on his hips, "Yeah. Idiot." He scoffed.

"It doesn't seem right." Juliet shook her head sitting down. "Everything that's going on has to be connected."

"That would make sense." Henry said coming into the room. "How ya feeling kid?" Henry asked.

"Fine," Shawn lied quickly hating all the stares he'd been given.

"Is he in custody?" Henry turned to Carlton.

"He was pulled in but wont be for long. We have no reason to keep him." Carlton nodded.

"Daddy, can I go home?" Zuri asked leaning on the arm rest.

"Soon baby." Shawn told her while Henry placed a hand on her back.

"Because of this recent… event." Carlton sighed, "I think it might be wise to place you under an eye."

"You want me under police surveillance? Why? I'm not even important in this case." Shawn protested.

"No but you're important in solving this case. I have to admit whatever gift you have is brilliant and we need it. With this medical condition and seemingly coincidental incident, it'll be smart." Carlton explained.

Shawn sighed but was unable to speak due to Juliet's interruption, "He's right Shawn. It might be helpful." Shawn looked from Juliet to his daughter and to his father who nodded. "Fine."

"But I want loose surveillance. I don't want it completely obvious that I'm under it, got it?" Shawn looked at Carlton.

"Consider it done." He disappeared out the door as the lights returned back to their normal fluorescent lightening.

"What's happening?" Zuri walked over and stood next to Henry.

"Daddy will be having a… babysitter." Henry picked her up.

"But daddy's a grown up, he doesn't need a babysitter." Zuri scrunched her nose.

"Sometimes adults need them too." Juliet smiled lightly, "It seems your temperature is down a little." Juliet removed the cloth from Shawn's forehead.

"Thanks." Shawn mumbled running a hand through his hair.

"I'm going to take her and your mother home, I'll be back later." Henry told Shawn as he carried a waving Zuri out of the room.

"Guess I'm on the first shift." Juliet sighed sitting down in a chair.

"Just go home. I'll be fine here… I want to sleep anyways." He looked down at the blanket covering his legs.

"Hospital security is crap Shawn, have you learned nothing from today?" She leaned on her hand. Shawn shrugged then took a long deep breath. Closing his eye's Shawn let his body fall back into the bed and winced slightly. "Is it your side?" Juliet asked siting up straight.

Shawn blinked his eyes open, "Yeah but… I'll be fine go home." Juliet frowned hearing Shawn slur as he talked.

"Shawn?" She questioned standing up.

"Want to sleep…" Shawn got out before his eyes closed and he fell asleep.

"It's just the pain medication he's on." Juliet whipped around to find a doctor standing by the door. "It makes people loopy." He said before leaving to check on another patient. Juliet looked back at Shawn before sitting back down and closing her own eyes.

Santa Barbara: 2010

"What the hell…" Juliet mumbled turning to look at the clock by her bedside table. It was barely two in the morning and her phone was blaring. "Hello?" She asked not bothering to look at the caller ID before answering.

"Jules… I don't know where I am." Juliet recognized the voice of her friend Shawn Spencer.

"Shawn it's two in the morning, why are you calling me?"

"I don't know where I am." He repeated. Juliet sat up and sighed when she heard the blare of a horn in the background. "Shawn are you drunk?"

"No." he replied with a scoff.

"You're slurring Shawn, and it's two in the morning. Why were you drinking this late?" Juliet slipped out of bed and began to put her shoes on.

"I wasn't drinking," Shawn protested. Juliet didn't believe him one bit as he hiccuped.

"What's around you Shawn? I need to know where you are." Juliet grabbed her car keys off the counter and exited her apartment.

"Umm…" Shawn paused, "There's a building."

"What does it say?" She started her car.

"I don't know. I can't read it." Another hiccup had her mumbling cusswords.

"Not drunk my ass… Shawn are you listening to me?"

"Yes!" He replied eagerly.

"I want you to go into the building and ask where you are." Juliet told him. She listened as Shawn made his way from wherever he was to the building. After a few seconds of a honking horn and a yell from Shawn he finally responded.

"Jackass. Almost ran me over…" Juliet rolled her eyes. "Twnety-third and quail."

"Stay right there, do you hear me Shawn?"

"Yeah yeah, I hear ya." She hung up and pulled out of her driveway heading towards the destination. The road was dark and barren as the city slept in the morning. She was certainly going to kill Shawn later for this. It was the middle of winter and she w as freezing even with the cars heater on. Turning down on quail she quickly noticed Shawn standing out the front of a bakery with a man.

"Is he okay?" She asked getting out of the car.

The man nodded, "He didn't want to wait inside. I couldn't leave him out here alone; he's drunk off his ass."

"Thanks." Juliet told the man. "Let's go Shawn." She swung his arm around his shoulder and with little help from him she managed to get him in the back seat of her car. "There's not even a bar around here, how the hell did you get way out here?"

"Magic," Shawn said with a wave of his hand.

Juliet drove the car towards Shawn's apartment with Shawn talking about whatever he pleased. It made no sense to her but she was just listening to make sure he was awake and alright.

"Then the fairies took Gus away and they wouldn't give him back." Shawn finished his ridiculous story.

"I'm sure Gus is just fine." Juliet assured him. Juliet couldn't help but let out a snicker. Although he was drunk and delirious he still seemed to give her a warm buzz. A warmth she only felt with him, no matter his state of mind. Parking in front of Shawn's apartment she began to lift him out of the car and into his unit. She turned on the lights and gently laid Shawn down onto the couch as he continued to mumble about fairies and Gus.

"Jules?" Shawn's voice was low and steady from the couch. Juliet turned from the door.

"What?" She walked back over to the couch and found him looking right at her.

"I'm lonely." He told her. Juliet's body stiffed at his look and slightly trembling body.

"Me too…" She whispered.

Santa Barbara: 2019

When Juliet opened her eyes she wasn't sure if the sight in front of her was real. The bed was empty. The sheets had been pulled up and the blanket was neatly folded. Hours ago Shawn had been on the bed and now it was like he'd never been in the room. She stood up and began to leave the room to look for a nurse but stopped when she heard a faint sniffle.

"Shawn?" she looked around. Listening closer she figured he was in the bathroom. "Are you okay?" she knocked on the door.

"Go away." Shawn responded. Juliet opened the door to find Shawn sitting on the floor. The hospital gown was falling off and it reveled his shoulder and parts of his bare chest. His phone was on the ground next to him and a picture was grasped in his hands. Silent tears poured down Shawn's cheeks and she was left speechless. "Zuri was bleeding." He said in a mumble.

"She's sick. She hit her head earlier because of a nightmare. God." He buried his head in his hands. "That stupid car." His leg kicked the toilet weakly. "I'm such a terrible father." His hands went into his hair and he pulled slightly.

"You're not a bad dad," Juliet kneeled down next to him and picked up his phone. "You're doing the best you can with her. It's hard being a single parent…"

"You don't understand!" Shawn yelled at her, "She should have had both parents. I shouldn't have adopted her, she would have been much better without me."

"She loves you Shawn. You are her father. Not anyone else. Nothing can change that. Honestly Shawn? I didn't even consider her being adopted." Juliet sat next to him.

"Because we look so much alike." Shawn snapped.

Juliet shrugged, "I thought she just looked like her mother."

"She doesn't even have a real mother. The mother she has is just a legal thing…"

"What do you mean Shawn?" Juliet turned to look at him.

"We lied." Shawn pursed his lips. "We told them we were in a committed relationship and that we couldn't have biological children. That's why we were adopting." Shawn began.

"A few months before I had run into Abigail. She told me she was still doing work in Uganda and we reconnected briefly. A few weeks later she called me and told me that she'd visited a little village that had been plagued with a sickness. After she came back into the states she told me about all the kids who had been left alone because of their parents being sick." Shawn licked his lips.

"I told her I'd actually begun to regret not having a kid. That's when she came up with it. Adopt a baby from Uganda."

"The two of you lied to get Zuri adopted." Juliet guessed.

Shawn nodded, "Legally Abigail is Zuri's mother. It was easy. We moved in together and went through the adoption process. After we officially had Zuri Abigail left in a way. She didn't want to be an actual mother so it was just me and Zuri." Shawn finished. Juliet stretched out her legs and stared at the wall across from her.

"She's everything to me." Shawn whispered. Juliet glanced down at the picture in his hand. She and Shawn were standing in the picture outside of the Psych office. Her head was on his chest and his arms were wrapped around her. The picture had been taken on their one year anniversary. They'd been so happy. Juliet leaned her head against the wall and felt a sob escape herself.

"Juliet…" Shawn turned to her.

"Stop it! Stop calling me Juliet. It's Jules. It's always been Jules to you," She broke down. "I regret it Shawn. I'm glad you have Zuri but I miss you. I thought I could replace you with Declan but I can't. He's not you, he's just not you." Juliet shivered.

"I love you Shawn Spencer." She whispered retracting her legs and placing her head on her knees. "I never stopped loving you. I never will."

She felt a warm hand on the back of her neck. "I love you too Jules." She glanced up at him and found him looking sincerely at her. She moved around until she was sitting on his lap facing him. She leaned in and kissed his lips. He kissed her back and wrapped his arms around her.

They broke apart a few second later both gasping heavily. Shawn rested his forehead against hers. "You're engaged." He reminded her putting his hands on her hips.

"Shh…" She kissed him again running her hands though his hair.

"Don't leave me." Shawn whispered breaking the kiss.

"Never." Juliet responded hugging him to her body.


Quiet a bit of twists and turns in the chapter. I hope you all enjoyed! I'm not sure when I'll update again; hopefully soon-ish.