Day 5; Sky.

(Butters / Kenny)

Butters sat cross-legged in a chair at his window, looking down at the notebook in his lap, and occasionally at the Colorado sky above him. His cheeks were obviously irritated and eyes still trying to push tears forward. The tips of his lips turned up ever so slightly.

The sky is still overcast. It was raining earlier today. I've been waiting for these days, when the sun is fighting to be seen through all of the clouds. It must seem out of place for me to love this. No one understands why. There's just something about the lit darkness of the sky and miraculous rain that comes with no proper entrance that calms me to serenity. Even with my parents yelling at me at a constant, even with Kenny being gone right now, even with the feeling that my life is falling apart again, and this time it won't get better, the sky tells me that it'll be okay and we all need these moments to reflect. Everything will be fine. The rain won't last forever.

He tried to continue his writing, seeing the whole page as blurry though in reality it was only fragments of a few select words. Realizing how pointless it would be to persist, he closed the notebook and moved his view to outside the window again, letting the tears fall freely as they'd been waiting to. He took deep breaths and wiped at his eyes. He waited for his chest to not feel so tight, his heart to stop crying, his impulse to be positive. He waited at the window, but felt no change.

Butters moved away from his perch and onto his bed. He tucked himself under the covers, hugged his extra pillow and cried. Small, fierce convulsions overtook his body. He wanted to deny all the beauty in the world and every miracle that's ever happened and that things seem to happen for a reason, he wanted to hate everyone and everything he could think of, especially what was upsetting him right now, but something wouldn't let him. In the pit of his chest next to the pain, a light was telling him to not be so dramatic and to get over himself. A light was telling him to go back to the window and stare at the fucking sky.

He insisted on being defiant, moving onto his back and letting the pillow lay on his extended arm. He stared dull-eyed at his ceiling. He wanted the unrelenting light to dim. He wanted a lot in his instant.

A knock echoed from his bedroom door.

Whoever it was, Butters was not in the mood to deal with them.

"Butters.. it's me."

He lunged up and watched his bedroom door.

"Uhm, hope I'm not bothering you or anything. I just wanted to-"

Butters fumbled out of bed and opened the door, meeting an equally wide blue pair of eyes as his own.

"Butters. Hi." The smile on his visitor's face made his stomach tighten. "Were you sleeping?"

"No.." He looked back at his bed, the blankets unmindfully thrown to one side and the pillow previously held so tightly tossed onto the floor. His grip on the door ceased and he returned to his place of comfort. "You can come in."

"Do I shut the door?"

"Go ahead."

Kenny came into the room, shutting the door behind him, and took a seat next to Butters.

"I just wanted to tell you I'm back... and I'm sorry and I missed you. Are you okay?"

He looked up at Kenny and felt himself breaking down. All he could see was yellow and orange. He felt his face twist and arms move around him and fought hiccups through his tears. He cried hard and loud like a child. His wails were muffled into Kenny's jacket. Kenny ran fingers through his hair and held him close. His crying calmed after what seemed to him to be forever. Kenny waited for the boy in his lap to settle, laughing inwardly at the genuine reaction.

"I'm sorry, Buttercup. I didn't mean for you to be so upset. I shouldn't have been on the roof, especially since it was raining. I'm used to doing stupid shit. I forget that someone cares about me now. I'm learning."

He waited for a response.

"Butters?"

Kenny moved the boy to see he had fallen asleep. He looked out the window to see that the rain had started up again. He picked up Butters and the discarded pillow on the floor, tossed it onto the bed and placed Butters on his side in the bed. He took the other side facing him and covered the both of them up and closed his eyes, listening to the sky cry.