"Spy on Zelena? Spy on Zelena?"
Sitting on the sofa, Killian's eyes widen at just how quickly David's arms have crossed, how he seems to have turned his body into a wall that can block Regina from the door.
"Do you have a better idea?" Regina snaps back. She takes a step back, her hand swerving upward, and he sees Emma tense, probably wondering if it will all come down to magical blows. Not this time, thankfully. Regina instead turns around and paces with her hands on her hips. If only her old evil cronies could see her now, forcing herself not to lose her patience.
"Well, wouldn't she suspect you of doing something like that?" Emma asks from behind the counter. She had been rummaging through the cabinets in search of anything that could be of use to Robin, and then all of a sudden the discussion had turned into monitoring Zelena.
"She would, but that doesn't mean I can't outsmart her," Regina counters. "Come on! This is a good idea. Don't you think it's strange that she hasn't even been by here to ask about the baby?"
"She wanted to stay away from her for her own safety," Killian reminds her.
"Yes, away from the baby. Not away from us. If she's onto a way out of here, we need to know about it, and if she's in trouble, then...we need to know about that, too."
"Careful, your Majesty. One might think you're harboring sisterly affection for a lunatic," he says, catching Regina starting to roll her eyes, but then contemplating his words. But if Zelena has found a way home? She could be holed up somewhere—in her quaint little farmhouse, perhaps—devising a plan to rip the baby away from Robin and leave the Underworld for good. It wouldn't be right to leave without stopping Hades, he thinks, preferably by slitting the god's throat somehow, but if a way out could be waiting for them afterward...
"You should," he speaks up, and he'd be a liar if he didn't enjoy Swan and David's matching surprised expressions just slightly.
"We already have enough people unaccounted for," David argues. "Prior to getting out of here, we have to round up Gold, Belle, Robin, the baby, and now Regina, too?"
"Create a rendezvous point, just as we are with Robin," Killian counters back. Bloody hell, this isn't his first go-around with this sort of thing. "Regina can report back by a certain time. If she's not back, we know to look for her." Evidently, they still need convincing as their faces have not changed, he notices with a sigh. "Zelena's caused enough havoc in all our lives that it makes sense someone should at least keep an eye on her. If she truly does want to help the baby, she could be discovering some way back all on her own, for all we know."
"He's right. You should go," Swan says quickly. "But we need you back here. We can go get the supplies Robin needs while you're doing that. We meet back up and go from there."
Regina gives the loft a lingering look, running her tongue over her lip in thought as she debates whether or not to interrupt Henry. Shaking her head at herself, she tosses her hair and buttons up her coat.
"I won't be gone long."
The citizens of the Underworld pass by in flashes of drab gray and brown. Killian can see them on his way down the stairs of the apartment. He had thought that, without the phone, the streets would be emptier, but everyone seems to be on a schedule. Whether they're dead or alive. He catches himself from snorting at the sentiment, however. He's certain Swan won't find it funny.
Opening the door for her, she halts and stares at the outside as if she's never seen it before. He follows her gaze to a small gaggle of people scurrying to the opposite end of the street, their voices muffled. In an eerie silence, the two of them begin a tentative walk toward the grocery store, only for more and more people avoid them. Most of them hurry to the opposite side of the street like the first group, pretending they don't see them. A few of the more awkward ones let out an audible gasp or stumble backward before taking off in another direction. Killian wonders if those were the ones who were actors when they were alive as obviously they are the more theatrical types.
"Ever since Hades' warning, no one wants to be caught anywhere near us," Swan explains in a hushed voice. Although she speaks quietly, it pierces the heavy silence. Twisting around to look behind them, he sees a couple here, a group of three there, looking at them and whispering to each other.
"Underworld pariahs," he notes. "Typical."
Swan slips her hand through the space between his body and his arm and wiggles in closer to him.
"That's not what I thought you were going to say."
"Oh? What was your prediction?"
"I thought you were going to say something about it being like it was just the two of us and rest of the world had disappeared or something, you know, big and eloquent," she says, gesturing with her free arm in such a way he knows just trying to describe that particular thought is rendering her tongue-tied. She rolls her eyes at herself, but he won't comment just yet. They've entered the parking lot to the grocery, an empty black square with painted lines, free of any empty bottles or stray bags. They walk across it to the front entrance just as a man with quite the official-looking paper hat and name tag bolts out the door and takes off into the distance.
"I think now I'll remark that it looks like we have the place to ourselves," he says, holding the door open for her again. Smirking at him, Swan enters and he follows her—and the signs hanging from the ceiling—to the aisle where they can find the items on Robin's list.
He's never seen so many images of babies beaming at him at the same time.
"Formula," he hears Swan breathe, her head bobbing from the list to the shelves. She grabs the largest container of it they have before calling out to him, "Can you grab the diapers? Size Two."
He really has no concept of how packaged, disposable diapers work, just that they are a gods-send, according to Snow. But he won't ask why not a Size One, how she knows not a Size One, or if Robin would prefer the ones with balloons or...it looks like a mouse with a dress and a large hair bow, he thinks with a squint, but he isn't sure. Ah. Ones with princesses swishing frilly gowns. He'll just tell Robin he didn't find any with arrows on them.
Swan gathers a few bottles, hooking the formula container into her chest. About to offer assistance, he notices her brow creasing at something.
"What is it?" he asks.
"Just wondering if we should get pacifiers. Might be a good way to help keep her quiet in the woods." She snags one off the shelf and nods at him to go, only to shuffle back to the end of the aisle. He raises an eyebrow at how she's managing to squat without dropping anything.
"You can let me take some of that, you know." He doesn't mean for his voice to echo, but it's a vast, empty store and she's about to slip onto her tailbone just to grab... "What is that?"
"Bath toys," she says proudly, holding up a small mesh sack containing a whale, an octopus, a sea turtle, a starfish, and two fish—all with smiling faces, of course. "They don't make noise, but she can hang onto them, and if Robin puts a little bit of water in them, he can squirt her with them." As if to demonstrate, she pinches the sides of the green fish, allowing him to see the small hole in the mouth where water would theoretically come out. He smiles at it, though, in spite of himself. This land, well, the land this land has been modeled after really has thought of everything. Child-rearing must be a good deal safer than in the Enchanted Forest...and quite possibly more fun.
"You're staring," he hears Swan half-sing, her expression soft, but utterly amused.
"It just doesn't look like any sea turtle I've ever eaten."
"Yeah, tell Robin's kid that when she's old enough to understand you. I'm sure that won't give her nightmares."
"Well, it won't give ours any."
Bloody hell. No. No, no, no, he did not blurt that out just now. Wincing at his own stupidity, he wonders how long he can go without lifting his head up to see Emma's terrified eyes. Not long. He brings his head up and sees...surprise, blushing, but a grin she tries to disguise by biting her lip.
"No," she says. "Ours will be weird like that."
They stroll up to where they would normally pay for their items, but only to bag them, seeing as how the worker was too afraid of them to bother staying at his post. Killian snakes his arm around her waist and kisses her, mostly with love, but also with relief. Savoring the touch of her fingertips on his jaw, she stays pressed into his side the entire walk back to the apartment, walking along the empty streets.
Like the rest of the world's disappeared.
Delivering everything takes more time than they had planned, what with Robin bloody popping out of the woods suddenly to change their meeting place for next time...and said next time will be sooner rather than later. Apparently, the small Hood lass defecates far more frequently than Robin had anticipated, more baby wipes an essential if he is to remain out there with her.
Rubbing his eyes, Killian notes the sun peeking over the horizon, adding light but no cheeriness to the Underworld, or "Underbrooke," as Regina's taken to calling it.
Henry greets them at the door of the apartment, shaking his head.
"No new revelations," he exhales, hunching his shoulders as he collapses into a chair and rests on his elbows.
"We know they don't work on your schedule," Swan assures him. "These things take time."
The clack-clack-clack of heeled shoes racing up the stairs grows louder and louder. He steels his eyes on the door while Swan and David rush to step between it and Henry. It should be Regina, but luck stopped caring about what should be ages ago.
"The night I've had..." Regina huffs, untying her scarf and turning up her nose at the sunlight streaming in from the windows. "Daytime. Great. Someone want to put on some coffee?"
"What happened with Zelena?" Swan asks her. They stand around the counter, waiting for the news, but still trying to provide Regina some space. A closer inspection does indeed indicate the woman is drained, a few hairs out of place and the makeup she's fond of looking stale. Taken together, it paints quite the haggard picture of Regina.
"On a date. Didn't you know that's what people do here? They go on dates and get wined and dined while everyone with a pulse has to get gray hair figuring how to get the hell out of here." She glances over at Killian. "No offense."
"Dating? Zelena?" Swan's eyes bulge.
"Don't worry. I'm sure it's forced," David mutters.
"Oh, don't bet on it," Regina laughs. Mirthlessly. "Want to know where Hades has been?"
"Inside Zelena?" Henry tries...quietly, but not too quietly. The lad fears his own shock value. Predictably, both his mothers frown at his choice of words.
"No," Regina draws out, glaring at her son. "Well..."
"Regina." Swan's arms fold, eyebrows narrowing until Regina throws up her hands.
"Apparently, they fell in love way back in Oz! And now, Grim Reaper in a Suit is trying to rekindle things with her. Yeah. She's been seeing him off and on and seems to be coming around to his way of thinking."
"Zelena is in love?" Swan repeats. It does warrant repeating. Gods, the Wicked Witch of Insanity and the God of Sadism. A perfect match.
"And not thinking rationally, which, for her, is a big problem," Regina adds. Killian shakes his head. They can't become a team. Not when the rest of them don't even have a plan for getting out of here. Zelena's magic combined with the rules of Hades' kingdom would be disastrous. Bloody hell, couldn't Regina have put a stop to this? Forbid the relationship? Knowing Zelena, that could result in some stomping and shouting to rival that of a petulant adolescent girl as easily as a fight.
"We have to stop her," he says. "And if you can't because she's your blood, then allow me to."
"What?" Regina asks, raising an eyebrow. "Kill her?"
"Well, it's a step in the right direction." Had he known, back when they were in the Enchanted Forest in the past and she was masquerading as Marian. Had he known the exact moment when Zelena had changed places with the poor woman, he would have killed her, exactly what he thought they should have done in the first place. Only he wouldn't have cared nearly so much. He'd like to go at least a couple of weeks without anyone stabbing him, and a Zelena-less world seems like a good starting point.
"Well, taking action against Zelena in any form will get messy," Regina says, wringing her hands. Oh, aye. Killing a witch is bound to have repercussions, Hades will be furious—which only spurs Killian to want to do it more—and it might undo any work Zelena's started in finding a way out of the Underworld. But he still won't mind killing her, especially if it means Emma won't have to.
"Okay," David announces, breaking his train of thought. "So we find a way to keep them apart. Without killing anyone," he says, leaning forward and looking straight at Killian. As much as he admires David, he can't help but grit his teeth at the eternal optimist. This is literal life and death they're dealing with; odds are someone will be staying here when this is all over.
"I'm waiting for the better option," he tries not to growl. He watches Emma out of the corner of his eye, second nature by now. She has her hands on her hips, mouth scrunched in thought. She shoots Regina an expectant look.
"So what's the plan?"
Regina hesitates, although she's done wringing her hands. Something's crossed her mind on her way over here. Something she's not sure is the best course of action.
"Well, there's only one person we can trust to destroy the love blooming between Hades and my sister," Regina begins. "Our mother."
Fuck.
"You would rather bring your murderous, tyrannical mother into this than just killing Zelena?" he balks.
"You used to work for her!" Regina argues back.
"I used to work with her!" Gods, Cora? Cora? He remembers hopping off the beanstalk, slippery in the rain, and having to confess to the witch why he didn't wait for her, how he still planned on helping her, how he just must not have been thinking straight—wondering all the while if she would rip out his heart as he'd seen her do to so many others.
"We don't even know where she is," Henry says, stepping forward.
"It's best that way," David tells him.
"Actually, she knew she would be punished if she didn't do what Hades wanted, which was for me to leave," Regina begins, wrapping her arm around Henry. "She was the mayor here, so to punish her, Hades would have to have demoted her to what she hated most—being a peasant. A miller's daughter. If there's a mill here, that's where she'll be."
"Let me stop you right there. We haven't even decided if this is worth doing," Swan says, holding out her hand.
"Mother isn't going to care about any of you. She's going to care about one of her daughters cavorting with someone she doesn't approve of, trust me."
That may be true, he thinks, but there has to be a way to enlist Cora's help without bringing her to the apartment. Snow White may have been the one to actually kill her, but Cora was smart. She wouldn't mind depriving Snow of a reunion with one of her loved ones, like her former commoner of a husband or her Savior daughter.
"Where's Zelena now?" he asks.
"Her farmhouse."
"Are you still able to enchant something to break a magic-blocking cuff?"
"That's a very specific request," Regina half-asks.
"If Hades has Cora somewhere against her will, I can help her escape. In exchange," he starts, holding out his hand before Regina agrees. "We take Cora straight to the farmhouse, and she deals with Zelena right then and there. She doesn't come anywhere near the rest of us."
"I can handle Cora," Swan murmurs to him.
"But you shouldn't need to handle Cora when we have other problems," he counters. "We don't need more enemies right now."
"Agreed," Regina states, nodding. "Heave to, pirate. Do what you do best."
"And what's that?" He shouldn't have asked, knowing Regina would insult him somehow, but perhaps he's a glutton for punishment today.
"Find people." She says it without reservation, her face puzzled that he even needed clarification. Grinning at Swan, he heads out the door.
The men Hades has assigned to guard Cora watch her, not the mill itself. Down in the cavernous space that leads to Hades' lair, a windmill spins without the aid of actual wind. Killian's never become intimately acquainted with millers' work, but he gleans it can provide endless labor for Cora to perform. He sidles up to the bushels of grain she's bound together and stuffs his hook into it. If all goes to plan, she can free herself of the magic-blocking cuff Hades would have undoubtedly clapped on her. If not, well, Cora was always the resourceful type and it's a rather sharp hook.
Blending into the shadows in the stone, he presses his back into the walls to stay shrouded in darkness. The guards won't turn their heads to even see him, but he'll take no chances. It's from this distance that he can make out a ragged figure straining to load sacks of flour half her height onto a wheelbarrow. White baking dust poofs out every time she drops one sack atop the other. She coughs here and there, grunts as she heaves another sack onto the pile.
Oh, he knows. He knows only too well how soul-sucking the work can be. When you're not working for yourself or your loved ones, when someone commands you do the task, when you slave away and give it your best so you can avoid the lash that you know will come anyway—he wouldn't say he was ever glad to be here, but he does relish the fact that he can save her from such torment.
At last, Cora switches to gathering up the grain. Her back to him, he grins when she picks up a particular bushel and hesitates. She sees it.
Dashing back into the tunnels, he'll wait for her. From a distance. Just in case. They didn't exactly part on the best of terms, what with her flinging him into a bookshelf and all. But Regina, and maybe even Zelena, need her.
He tenses at the sound of her footsteps echoing in the tunnel. She appears before him, clad in a peasant's garb, flour and dirt caked all over her.
"Hello, love."
"Hook!" she breathes in relief, ambling toward him with his hook in her hand. "So I was right. You are my fairy godmother."
"Well, no one's ever called me that before, but I suppose I am," he says, twisting his hook back onto the brace. She looks pleased to see him, and maybe they really were old friends. "Let's get out of here. Your daughter needs you."
Cora hitches up her skirts and follows him out.
"She should have left."
"Well, I for one, am glad she didn't." He doesn't wait for Cora to apologize since in just about every land he's ever been to, its version or versions of hell have yet to freeze over. "Where's Pan?"
"Pan?"
"Yes, Peter Pan. The longer I'm stuck here, the more familiar faces I run into and I'd rather like to avoid his. What's his job down here? What's Hades have him doing?"
"Believe it or not, Hook, we don't all just gather together at the local tavern to swap stories about how we all almost defeated your friends," she scoffs, lowering her hood and smoothing her hair. "What makes you think you need to worry about him, anyway?"
"I didn't expect to interact with you while I was here, and yet here we both are," he argues. That would account for everyone. Cora, Pan, Zelena, Cruella...he has a feeling the Snow Queen has no unfinished business. Going back further than that hurts his head. Should he run into his father here...or Captain Blood...or a few Nereid with a strong distaste for rum...
"He runs the pawn shop, or he did when I was allowed to think I was running things around here," she says as if she were about to spit out her words. "Tell me what's happened that Regina's asked you to come get me."
"I think it would be better if she filled you in on the details herself. Besides, Hades has eyes and ears all over this place. The sooner we separate, the safer we'll both be." He stops at the mouth of a cave that he knows will lead through the woods back to the Underworld streets, unguarded now. The red sunlight doesn't give much comfort to them, but the vastness of the forest helps him breathe easier than the cramped, narrow tunnel had.
"Then we'll say goodbye," she says with her chin parallel to the ground. She gestures with her hand at her feet and turns her wrist up to her head so that when her magic smoke disappears, she's as polished and regal as ever. No need to linger. She suddenly grabs his hand, and he swallows, replaying every moment of their partnership in his mind to try to determine if she feels the need to do anything to him.
"Goodbye, Hook," she says. "May neither of us stay here for much longer."
"Maybe I'll drink to that with you one day in the true afterlife." She lets go of him and disappears into the trees. It's up to her and Regina now. Feeling around in his pockets, he lets out a silent laugh that, after all the dying and the torture, he has his phone. Durable little things. Holding it up, he finds his and Swan's picture and calls her as if it were any other day.
"Hello?"
"It's done," he says. "Cora's on her way to Regina."
"Good. I put a barrier on the apartment just in case, though," she says. Then there is silence. "How are you calling me?"
"I have no idea," he laughs after a beat. "I'm coming back to the apartment."
"Actually..." she trails off, and he can hear shuffling, movement. "Dad is supposed to be back any minute for us to run more things out to Robin. He's running a little late, though."
"I can meet up with him if you like," he offers.
"No. I'm sure he's on his way, and there's got to be a better way to make ourselves useful while Regina's handling Zelena. What about the sheriff's station?"
"What about it?"
"Well, has anyone been by it?"
"I thought your father's evil brother or some new relative with an agenda was in charge of it here. Your family, Swan. I swear on everything that's holy I've never seen anything like it."
"Yeah, well...we can paint a big family tree on one of the walls at home to help keep things straight later," she snorts. "Can you go see if it's empty? If James isn't there, maybe this station's armory has things that can actually do some good down here. Like instead of guns, it has potions or spells we can use. The whole point of it is to control the town, right?"
"I'll give it a look," he says, shrugging off the notion that it's a long shot. Their entire history together has been nothing but one long shot after another. And, he thinks, if he were Hades, he would try to hide at least a couple of items in the least likely locations.
"Be careful," she adds.
"Always am, love." Inhaling, he starts the well-traveled route out of the woods back into town, feeling rather at ease. He's bound to run into someone, certainly, but if being dead has a perk, it's that he's not really in immediate danger of much, save a little bit of pain. Hades wouldn't be stupid enough to recruit Cruella or James to do anything of consequence, like carry around the water that could render him a Lost Soul. As for the rest of the town, they'll be evading him just as they did the previous night. It's not the first time he's been the outsider.
It seems odd, entering the sheriff's station when he knows he won't see Swan or her father behind one of the desks. If he stops to consider, wandering through the Underworld in general gives off a sense of foreboding. It's the same "vending machine" Swan told him one of the dwarves got his hand stuck in one time. It's the same humming rectangular lights above him. It's the same building, and yet it's not.
It's not the same swinging sound followed by a metal clang that he hears. That's the door to one of the jail cells. Breaking into a run, Killian clenches his fist, readying himself to tackle whoever it may be to the floor.
"Hook!"
In an instant, David's hands are on his arms. He's breathless and disheveled, half his shirt tucked into his trousers. Killian looks past him at the wide-open cell door.
"We have to go! Now!" David staggers, launching himself off of Killian.
"Wait! What's going on?" He knows better than to ask too many questions when something is making them run, but he's not foolish enough to run towards an unknown threat.
You didn't know who had been in the cell, mate, he reminds himself.
"James!" David pants, patting his chest and waist all over. "Damn it. He took my gun!"
"Gun?"
"James ambushed me! He's making the drop-off with Emma! She and Robin are in trouble!"
Oh, no, they're not. He used to want to bash the prince's head in, so doing it to his twin is the closest he will ever come.
You would have liked him. He was a thief and a liar.
And worse, if the hushed stories about him he'd heard in pubs were true. If they're quick enough—they'll be quick enough—Emma won't experience any of it. He has to run faster. They have to know where to look.
"There! The harbor!" David calls to him.
He sees them. He sees a gun to Emma's head. He speeds up, David leaps out and wrestles it away from him.
"How's that for quick?" he snaps at his brother. The gun slides across the dock as everyone scatters. It's coming in his direction. Finally, some luck. He bends down and takes it seconds before Cruella even attempts to stoop down for it.
"I'll take that, love. It's not like you can use it, anyway."
Cruella puffs up and deflates before scurrying off to hide.
"Killian!" Emma rushes toward him. She clutches his arm and glances past him, probably making sure Cruella hasn't found something to use that's good for bludgeoning.
"Looks like we're just in time," he says, giving her a tentative smile as he checks her over. She's not hurt. She had a gun to her head, but she's not hurt. It would be one of those moments where he can only see and hear her, but a choked, broken excuse for a laugh erupts. They turn around, still holding onto one another, and see James squaring off against David.
"Whoo! Oh, that was quite an escape, David. Quite frankly, I didn't think you had it in you," he taunts him. They're identical all right, until they open their mouths and start speaking.
"The cell at the station was the last place you should've left me. You don't think I know how to break out of my own jail?"
"So what?" James circles him, shooting him a rather nasty sneer. "Now you can swoop in and play hero?"
"That's up to you, James. Neither one of us wanted to go through what we did. I was angry about it, too! But it doesn't mean it has to end this way. We're family!" David pleads with him, and Killian isn't sure of a time when he loved the prince more. The pathetic man had a gun pointed at his daughter and David still tries to appeal to James' better nature. Killian would have run him through, past the point of caring if he even had one, and, judging by the laughter, Prince James doesn't seem to.
"I can help you move on," David tries again. "And I can help you find some peace."
"Yes, yes, you can. Because killing you is my unfinished business!" James lunges at David, throwing him backwards into a few crates.
"Dad!" Emma screams. She throws up her hands, ready to use her magic, but David holds up his hand. She freezes, giving him a quizzical look.
"Emma! I've got this," he calls to her. Do you, mate, he wishes he could ask. He takes a step forward as David blocks a kick and jumps to his feet, punching and grappling. Emma brings her hands up, but they're still too close.
David throws James off of him, inches from the edge of the harbor. Cruella even hisses at him to come join her, but he pulls a knife from his boot instead. No. No, they have to stop this now, in spite of David's protests. He'll kill him. He won't stop.
"James, wait!"
Before anyone can do anything, James hurls himself at David, only for David to spin and toss him away from him.
Into the water.
Emma sprints over to her father. David just stands there, watching the green in the water fan out and then fade away, dragging James along with it. A Lost Soul. He opens his mouth to speak, but feels a body next to him. It's Robin, huddled up against them with the baby in his arms.
"Is the baby okay?" Killian asks.
"Yeah. Y-yes, she's fine," Robin stutters, holding her even tighter.
"You okay?" he hears Emma ask David, and, no, he does not look okay. He just stands there, watching the water, face crumpling. "You did what you had to. You know that, right?"
"No, there had...there had to be another way," David breathes, voice breaking.
"There wasn't," Emma assures him. "Dad, sometimes people just cannot ever move on."
"I know. It's... Despite everything...he was my brother."
There isn't much she or anyone else can say to that. Emma rests her head on David's arm, rubbing his forearm up and down, trying to pull him away from the harbor.
"Dad. We really need to round up Henry and see if Regina's found anything out." Arm in arm, she leads him back toward the street, and Killian tries to linger, just to give them some privacy. Not that he doubts Emma can soothe her own father, but he feels the slightest pang in his chest that Snow isn't here.
"When Cruella had said he was damaged, and that all he wanted was to know why our mother didn't choose him...I don't know..." he hears David trailing off, watching him shudder. "We could have sat down and talked, really talked. You don't know, Emma, but King George was a horrible man, and to have to be his son—I could barely stand doing it for a few weeks, let alone an entire life. A-and he didn't know anything about Mother. I was going to tell him all about her."
"You can tell me," Emma says, just above a whisper. She pats her father's back as she pulls out car keys with her other hand.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. No offense to Queen Eva, but I think I should know who my favorite grandma would have been," she says. The two of them share a smile and walk further up, their voices falling out of earshot.
"Thanks," Robin says, tapping Killian on the shoulder. He jostles the baby for a moment, almost slinging her over his shoulder, only he minds her head and helps her stayed as propped up as a newborn can be.
"I didn't do anything, mate."
"If you and David hadn't come when you did...I didn't want to say this in front of David, but it's best for all of us now that we have one less threat to worry about." Robin's face reddens and he quickens his pace, apparently trying to put as much distance between where James fell and himself as possible. "I have no idea if Regina will ever get through to Zelena or not, Hades is as big a mystery as he was when we all got here, and—forgive me—you're still dead."
"Thank you for reminding me," Killian scoffs. At least he doesn't feel dead, which he supposes is a boon. He can feel his heart beating, takes breaths, feels tremendous amounts of pain, courtesy of the aforementioned deity.
"Sorry. I'm not making myself clear. What I mean is, we need to be free of distractions if we're going to make it back. Hades and other former enemies scattering us about can't be good. We have to stay banded together."
Very true.
"Listen," Killian begins, scratching his ear. "We've been through a lot together, but we're not close, and for you to come here after me...and now with your daughter in tow, I...I'm grateful. Truly. If there is ever anything you need, if you ever have need of my services, I'll gladly provide them." He feels he should continue, but treads carefully to avoid babbling. If, when they're all back, Robin decides to take the plunge with Regina, he'll be family. "If you ever tire of the woods, I do have a ship, and Henry and I often have our work cut out for us. Another member of the crew would be a great help."
Beaming, Robin grins down at the baby before looking back up at him, his chest swelling with pride.
"It would be an honor to sail with you, and even though you're no stranger to trekking through the woods, I offer my services to you as well." He coos at the baby, who has opened her eyes and looks quite stunned at her surroundings. "I thought I was out of practice, to tell you the truth, but we're doing just fine, she and I. She's actually taking to the woods better than Roland did."
Killian peers down and finds she bears some resemblance to her father, although if one were to ask him how he'd arrived at that, he'd be at a loss. There isn't much he can do for her now, but he silently promises her she will not have her chance to live stolen from her. Storybrooke needs all of them, especially a little outlaw.
Night falls and Regina has not yet made it back. They've since left the apartment and stalked the street, hoping to catch sight of her. They take turns holding the baby, for Robin occasionally looks ready to fly off the handle, his hands shaking. Emma carries her now, patting the little one's rump now and then to comfort her...or settle her own nerves.
"What if she's dead?" Henry wonders once the two of them are far enough away from the others.
"What?"
"What if she's dead and she just walks up here like nothing happened?" Henry asks, his face pale. "Killian, you were banged up, but you didn't look any different when we found you. You didn't look dead. You remembered everything, right? Like how it happened? Sorry. Sorry, that's an insensitive question. I just...I've seen too many movies, I guess."
"It is an insensitive question, but I'll forgive you if you spell things out for me," he offers, stopping and bending his head down just a little so they can be eye-to-eye. It won't be long before Henry might even surpass him in height. But as he watches the lad take a deep breath and close his eyes, it still feels like he's a small child, just for the moment.
"What if, while she's gone, Hades or someone kills her, and she doesn't realize it because she's already here? Then, when she comes back, we won't know it right away and when the time comes to leave, she can't."
He considers asking what the bloody hell type movies Henry's been watching that deal with such macabre subject matter, but he instead opts to squeeze the boy's shoulder.
"If I know Regina, no one alive or dead could ambush her that quickly without suffering her wrath," he says. That seems to give Henry some solace, although it doesn't account for Regina's absence. Perhaps Cora hadn't been helpful at all? What if Cora had done something to Regina, thinking she was helping her? He'd been the one to help her escape. It would be his fault...
"Regina!" Robin rushes past them and wraps his arms around Regina, walking tearfully up the street with her hands shoved into her pockets. The instant Robin holds her, she unleashes a sob and clings to him.
"Mom!" Henry reaches her next and scrunches in, his arms around her waist.
"Thanks, everyone," she says, wiping her eyes and standing a little straighter. "I...it's been a rough day."
"Where's Cora?" Killian asks.
"At peace," Regina says with a nod, her dignity regained. "She had a long talk with both of us, both her daughters, and then she closed out her unfinished business. So..."
"Take your time," David says gently at the same time Emma hands the baby back over to Robin.
"So Zelena hasn't been all that willing to get into a relationship with Hades until now. Mother might have reconciled with both of us, but she left us with some major trust issues as far as love lives go." She shoots Robin a quick look and then continues. "She said that Hades is as anxious to leave here as we are, that Zeus hit the pause button on his heart or something, and if she jump starts it, he can leave the Underworld."
"Sounds like she's getting used," David says.
"Well, yes, it does, but we need to remember she knows Hades better than any of us do, and the whole reason my mother didn't cross over before was that she always thought she should be making our choices for us, so...I gave Zelena my blessing to be with him."
They all stand there. In horror.
"You told her what?" Swan demands, and, for the first time in a long time, Killian would not be surprised if she just walked up and started throttling Regina. If this horrendous match of lunatic witch and rapacious death god turns out to be true, he might have to join in.
"To give him a chance," Regina says, cringing at her own actions. Well, that should be the first indication everything is about to go wrong, he thinks. Follow your own instincts and ignore Zelena's.
"And you thought that was a good idea because..." David seems to be rattling the idea around in his head.
"Because we're family." Gods, not this again. The Crocodile is family to all these people, and yet no one's seen or heard anything from him in days. "And I'm trying to trust Zelena. She thinks she can change Hades."
People change themselves, he longs to shout at her, to grab her by the shoulders and shake her until this, this...insane concept of people being accountable for other people's actions flies out of her system. Change? Change? Steering clear of the baby was one thing; expecting the god of the dead to be so wrapped around a woman's finger that he's stopped with the torturing and entrapment in favor of holding hands and giving everyone a puppy is...well, very Regina-esque at this point.
"I'm sorry, love. I missed the part where Zelena changed," he snaps. And to think she'd called him a moron.
"You'd think the ex-pirate with a rum habit would cut my sister some slack!" she spits back.
"Well, you'd think that the Evil Queen would be smarter than to send the Wicked Witch to romance the most devious man alive!" The sad part is that Hades is probably counting on them to do that by now. He gets a woman's attention, Zelena won't care one way or another, and then they'll all rot down here for eternity. Wonderful. There should be a rancid bottle of champagne to uncork to mark the occasion...
Easy, guys," Swan warns. "We're not going to win the war against Hades if we use all our ammo on each other."
"The Savior has a point," a familiar voice praises her. Hades, strolling down the street right toward them all. Not if he can help it.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Killian demands, stepping out in front. He'll have to drag him back to that prison cell before he'll let him so much as touch Emma and the others.
"Get behind me, kid," Emma hisses to Henry, pushing him behind her.
"Oh, I didn't find you to hurt you. I came for your..." Hades seems to have forgotten they are all there, his eyes closing as he half-laughs, half-sighs. Something has him utterly bemused. "Wow. This is hard. Help."
"What could you possibly want our help with?" David snaps.
"Simple. I went to meet Zelena for our date and found this." He holds a piece of parchment up in his gloved hand. Regina dares to be the one to snatch it from him, unfolding it and skimming the writing with horrified eyes.
"No," she groans, passing it to Emma.
"Zelena—she's been kidnapped by Gold and Pan," she says.
So Pan is involved in this after all, Killian thinks, rolling his eyes. He'd thought about killing him in Neverland countless times, plotting together just how he would do it and then scrapping every idea, knowing the little rotter controlled the entire place with his magic. When Killian had been brash enough to demand to leave—with at least a full bottle of rum guzzled down—Pan had wanted to know why. He'd told him the truth—that killing Rumpelstiltskin had become his purpose in life, and Pan had laughed until he'd cried, holding his sides until he was writhing on the ground.
He'd found the coincidence of his pirate associate wanting to murder his son amusing then. And now they were teamed up...
"They're asking for a meeting tomorrow morning," Hades adds.
"Gold wants you to tear up the contract for his unborn child..." Emma finishes the note, snapping her head up. Killian glares at Hades. The fiend, planning to horde Belle's child and string along Zelena. He wouldn't care about the latter except Regina's rigged the game so he'll be stringing all of them along.
"So do it!" Regina orders. "I just got my sister back. I'm not going to lose her now!"
"Neither will I," Hades barks. "I'll give them what they want, but I know the Stiltskins and their tricks. They're not going to keep their word, not unless I have an ace up my sleeve."
"Luckily for you, you've got one." He hates himself for siding with Regina, but she's right. He's the ruler of this kingdom. Can't he do to Pan whatever he wants? Can't he snap his fingers and have Pan working the mill for an infinite amount of time?
"I'm sorry. You've been Zelena's doting sister for all of what, three hours? No"
"Who's going to be more motivated than me?" Regina challenges him.
"Emma."
Killian's eyes never leave her for long, but he feels that if he had been looking right at her, Hades wouldn't have uttered her name. She snaps to, blinking and giving Hades a confused look.
"What? Why?"
"If Zelena gets out of this alive, I'm prepared to offer you a deal," he says.
"Don't trust a word he says, Emma." He doesn't mean to growl it, but he can't help but warn her and snarl at Hades at the same time. Anything to keep the gap between them from closing. She has to know by now not to listen to the word of a villain. Even if the facts they present to you are true, they'll always choose what they want over you. He should know. He was once just like that.
"Now I agree with the pirate," Regina concurs, but Emma is watching Hades, perhaps using her superpower on him.
"You and I both know your family wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. If you help me save her, I'll take everyone's names off their headstones."
He has her. Damn it. The guilt that's been eating her alive since she's arrived here, the fear she'll lose someone else. Hades knows.
"So we can leave the Underworld," she murmurs. Yes, but knowing Hades, they'll leave without their arms or they'll suddenly develop a taste for human flesh or some steep price he has yet to mention.
"So, what do you say, Savior?" Hades challenges her. "Do you want to send your family home or not?"
A/N: I feel this is a good time to tell you that I will not be covering the Season 5 finale. It's not that I didn't like it (parts of it), but, to me, it was jus the Season 6 premiere airing three months before the rest of the season. Pretty much everything had been resolved, it didn't address the themes or conflicts specifically focused on in Season 5, and, for my storytelling purposes, it would be anti-climactic to include it. "Last Rites" is about a lot of things, but one of those central things was how much Hook had changed and how, even if he doesn't yet "own" it, cemented his heroism now is. This is his story that I'm telling, so I have to concentrate on him and what he goes through, how he reacts to what's around him, and how he changes. "Last Rites" does a much better job doing that specific task than the finale, and there is a certain way I want to end this story. So this is an announcement that there won't be a whole lot more chapters. I'll let you know how many when I post the next one since it's long and just a teeny-tiny bit heartbreaking, since, you know, it's "Firebird" and everything that comes with it. Thank you for your support.
Coming up? Get the tissues ready because I am pulling out all the stops.
