Note: Sorry for the taking so long to update. I mistakenly deleted this chapter so I had to rewrite everything. Also, life has been giving me a kick in the behind. Dealing with some personal stuff that has distracted me to no end.

Chapter 18

Saturday, June 21th, 1997

Tara dry heaved into the toilet, tears streaming down her face as she did so.

She waited a few moments before standing on shaky legs.

Splashing some cold water on her face, Tara made her way to the living room where she lay down. She noted that it was past eight in the morning and she groan as she felt her stomach flip. She innerly cussed Matt and Katie for taking her out the night before. The word hangover did not cross her mind when she thought of how she wanted to celebrate her nineteenth birthday.

Shutting her eyes, Tara prayed that the day got better.

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It was the click of a door that woke her up. Slowing she rose from the couch, stretching as she did so. The urge to vomit had ceased but her stomach still felt a bit unease. Making her way to the kitchen, she heard movement in Katie's room and decided to put on a pot of coffee before knocking on her cousin's door.

Walking into the bathroom, she heard Katie talking softly on the phone with someone and she shook her head as she heard the signs of her cousin crying.

After brushing her teeth and getting a cup of coffee, Tara knocked on Katie's door.

"Kitty Kat?"

She heard the sobs stop. "Tara, please leave me alone."

"But Katie..."

"Tara, fuck off. I don't want to talk to you or anyone! Just leave me alone," Katie sobbed.

Tara winced but back away from the door. She figured that stuff with Joey must have been dismal if Katie was so devastated.

Tara walked back to the living room and took a sip of coffee. Cringing, Tara, made her way to the kitchen and dumped the coffee she made.

Grabbing her keys, Tara walked out the apartment.

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Tara walked into the bodega and fought to keep the smile off her face.

By the counter, Mr. Diaz and Luis Mario were enjoying each others company, both men with a cup of coffee in front of them and a chessboard in between them.

"Tara!" Mr. Diaz motioned for her to move closer which Tara gladly did.

"How is the birthday girl?" teased Luis Mario.

"The birthday girl is hungover," she replied a small smile spreading across her face. "A nice light and sweet would do me wonders. But, Mr. Diaz has to make it. His coffee is untouchable."

Luis Mario put on a mock face of horror to which both Mr. Diaz and Tara laughed.

"You have broken my grandson's heart, Tara," said Mr. Diaz as he walked towards the coffee machine.

"Just so you know, Tara, my coffee is legendary. I have been told many times," replied Luis Mario as he watched his grandfather fix a cup of coffee.

"It might be legendary, but Mr. Diaz has that love and soul behind his coffee," Tara smiled kindly as she watch the old man make his way to her, a small cup of coffee in his old, weathered hands.

"Gracias, Tara," Mr. Diaz smiled at her as he placed the cup in front of her.

She took a sip and moan in deep satisfaction. "Oh, this is heaven sent," she muttered.

Both grandfather and grandson chuckled.

"What are you going to do today?" asked Mr. Diaz.

Tara shrugged her shoulders. "I thought my cousin, Katie and I were going to do something but I think she broke up with her boyfriend or something. She is back at the apartment, crying hysterically. So, I'll probably just stay in and read for a bit, watch some tv."

"Ay no! It's your birthday, you must celebrate," insisted Mr. Diaz.

"Well, Mr. Diaz, I celebrated last night. Plus, I don't know a lot of people so..."

"Luckily, you know me," finished Luis Mario. "How about I show you the less extravagant New York City? Less booze and more sightseeing."

"Oh, I couldn't possibly inconvenient you in such a manner."

Mr. Diaz rolled his eyes. "You, go to casa. Change out of sweats and my grandson will meet you in front of your building."

"Mr. Diaz," Tara blushed.

"It's settled! Go and get comfortable. Meet you in about half an hour in front of your building. I suggest you hurry cause there is much to do," smiled Luis Mario.

Tara couldn't help but smile as she saw his pearly whites.

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Tara laughed as she followed Luis Mario thru the gates. "Really? This is the greatest place in New York?"

"One of them! Top ten, easily."

Tara laughed. "I got to say, when you said I was going to experience the less extravagant New York City, I thought you meant Central Park."

"For your information, Ms. Knowles, Central Park is beautiful amongst the concrete jungle that is New York City, however, there are other places, that are easily over looked. For instance," he looked around, "this place is fantastically great. Especially now in the summer. Sometimes it gets overcrowded but people spend most of their time in city parks and beaches."

Tara and Luis Mario walked further in. "This is quite impressive."

"Told you so. My grandfather use to bring my grandmother and I here every weekend when I was a kid. As I grew older, the visits became less frequent." He looked around with nostalgia. "Wish I would had cherished those last moments."

They both walked in silence for a few moments.

"Do you miss your mother?" Luis Mario asked frankly.

Tara took a few moments to collect her thoughts. "At times, I resented her for taking the easy way out. But after a while, I guess, I understood her. Getting lost in something bigger than oneself. Losing yourself so much that at times when you look in the mirror, you can't even recognize the person you have become. It's easy to get lost when there isn't anything but darkness."

"That's deep."

"No, that's the truth," she replied as she thought of Jax.

They walked in silence for a bit enjoy the warm sun.

"Do you regret not having your parents?"

Luis Mario looked over at her, "All the time. But I always believed that things happened for a reason. If it weren't for my parents death, I wouldn't have lived with my grandparents. I wouldn't have grown up in New York and I wouldn't have had the pleasure of showing a beautiful young lady the wonders of the Bronx Zoo on her birthday."

Tara blushed and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "You don't have to say things like that."

"But to quote you, 'it's the truth.'"

Tara remained silent as they walked further into the zoo.

"Look, Tara. I could see that you are dealing with some stuff but I am a patient man. I am not saying we should date or anything like that but if you ever need a person to talk to, please consider me a friend."

Tara squinted up and looked into the most soulful brown eyes she has ever seen. "Ok," she whispered.

"Ok," he responded with a smile. "Now, how about we go look at some monkeys and gorillas?"

Tara laughed as he took one of her hands and pulled her into the zoo.

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"This ride is a landmark!"

"But people have died in this ride!"

"People die crossing the damn street. Come on Tara! This is a highlight of New York City."

"A Yankee game would had suffice," she grumbled as she crossed her arms in front of her.

"The Yankees are out of town for the next week, plus," Luis Mario pointed at a flyer nearby, "next week will be the Cyclone's 70th birthday. What better way to celebrate than riding this bad boy?"

Tara glared at Luis Mario prompting him to step closer to her until they were inches apart. He leaned forward until he was inches away from her ear, "plus, I promise you, I won't let anything happen to you."

Tara shivered as Luis Mario pulled away. She felt a wave of nausea hit her suddenly. Blinking her eyes rapidly, Tara tried focusing on Luis Mario's button up.

"You ok?"

"Yea, just give me a minute." She walked to a nearby bench and sat down. She felt her heart beat rapidly against her chest. She closed her eyes and Jax's face flashed across her eyes. She put her hand over her heart as a feeling of dread spread across her body.

"Tara?" Luis Mario crouched in front of her. "Are you alright?"

"Jax?" she whispered as her heart beat rapid against her chest. She collapsed as feelings of dread spread across her body.

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"You need to stop fussing over me."

"You fainted in Coney Island."

Tara shrugged. "It was the heat. Plus, I was starving."

"You can't bullshit a bullshitter. It wasn't the heat. You were fine when we were at the zoo. Plus, who is this Jax? You said his name before you blacked out."

Tara averted his eyes. "He is no one."

Luis Mario sighed before taking a bite of his sandwich. He pensively looked at Tara as he chewed.

"You know, for someone who fainted because of hunger, you sure aren't eating."

Tara glared at Luis Mario before picking up her spoon. She took a sip of the thick soup he had ordered for her and was surprised by the flavor.

"This is delicious."

"That's sancocho for you. So, is he an ex?"

Tara put down her spoon and cross her arms in front of her. "Jax is someone who is not up for discussion."

Luis Mario put his sandwich down. "He obviously means a lot to you. People don't faint over people that don't mean anything to them. So, who is he?"

Tara sigh. "Can we just not discuss him?"

"You are avoiding talking about someone who has caused you pain. Maybe to get over him, you need to talk about it. Ignoring the pain isn't going to make it go away."

Luis Mario remained silent as Tara's eyes got incredibly sad.

She bit her lip and looked out the window for a few moments.

"Where do you want me to start?" she whispered.

"How about from the beginning?" he replied.

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"He was a damn fool and a coward."

"Luis Mario..." Tara warned as they walked across the Brooklyn Bridge towards Manhattan.

"It's true. If I had one shot with you, I would have fucking ran out of the damn state."

"Thanks, I guess," muttered Tara. "Too bad Jax didn't share the same sentiments."

They walked in silence for a bit watching the sun set over New York City.

"Have you had any contact with him since you left Charming?"

"No. And nor do I want to. I am done with all of his broken promises."

Luis Mario shoved his hands inside his jeans pocket. "But you'll always love him."

Tara took a moment before responding. "If I could stop loving him, I would." She looked over to Luis Mario. "Jax has been just a huge part of my life. He came into it when my world was the darkest and he brought hope and love into it. It's hard to imagine my life without him but I refuse to rot in Charming. I want better things for myself. And I wanted better things for him too. But, he made his choice and I will respect it."

"Will you ever go back?" Luis Mario pondered.

"Honestly, not if I could help it."

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"So, this is where you are staying?" asked Luis Mario as he looked around Katie's very small apartment.

"This is it," Tara shoved her hands into the back of her jean pockets.

"Kind of small, don't you think?"

"Hey, I was lucky that Katie offered me a place to crash."

"Well, you could stay with me. That couch must be uncomfortable."

Tara looked at Luis Mario. "Excuse me?"

"Rich offspring, remember? My parents left me a trust fund. I got a loft in Brooklyn that has ten times more room than this hole in the wall."

"That would be highly inappropriate," said Tara as she walked to the kitchen for a glass of water. "People will get the wrong impression."

"Not if we are roommates," replied Luis Mario as he followed her to the kitchen and leaned against one of the counters. "Think about it, you'll have your own room, safer neighborhood, great company. The list is endless."

Tara took a drink of her water. "You have figured it all out, don't you."

"Nah, I am just your knight in shining armor," said Luis Mario as he curtsy making Tara laugh.

"Thanks for the offer but I'll pass," smiled Tara.

"I'll keep it on the table. It's a three bedroom loft. Plenty of room."

Tara nodded as she set the glass down on the counter. "I'll keep that in mind."

"I should get going. It's late and we had a long day. Got to close shop for grandpa and make my way back to Brooklyn on top of that."

"Let me see you out."

"Seriously, Tara," Luis Mario leaned over to open the door, "consider my offer. It's a good one."

"And what offer is that?"

Both Luis Mario and Tara jumped.

"Oh Matt! I didn't know you were coming over."

"Well, if you picked up that damn phone you would had known!" Matt strolled into the apartment and handed Tara two bottles of wine and a plastic bag containing what Tara suspected was an ice cream carton. "Pop those open, darling. It's time to continue the birthday celebration. Luis Mario come join us."

"Nah, I got to go. Got to close shop. Matt, a pleasure to see you again." Luis Mario turned to look at Tara. "Happy Birthday, Tara and think about my offer. I'll make sure to make it your worthwhile."

Without hesitation, Luis Mario shut the door to which Tara immediately locked it.

"So, what was that about?" asked Matt from the couch, one leg crossed over the other.

"Nosy, much?" Tara walked into the kitchen to open one of the wine bottles.

"I'm not nosy. I am what my fat Italian mother calls, well informed," replied Matt with a cheeky smile.

Tara scoffed as she poured the wine into two cups.

"Where is Katie?"

"I just got in but it doesn't seem like she is here. I think Joey broke up with her," Tara walked back to the living room with the cups and ice cream in hand."Here," she handed Matt a cup as she sat down. Taking a small sip, Tara leaned back. "This is good. I'm not much of a wine girl but this is good."

"Chianti, darling," Matt took a sip. "Enjoyed your birthday with Mr. Hunk?"

"He just took me around the city. Don't start anything that isn't there, Matt."

"Oh but my sweet dear, every great love story has a beginning," Matt replied as he tapped his mug against hers, a wise smile spread across his lips.

Tara had a sassy replied on the tip of the tongue when she noticed Katie walking into her apartment. She gasped.

"Fucking Jesus and Mary. What the hell happened to you?" asked Matt incredulously.