So, more or less in 3x01.

But as the rest of the story suggests it, things happened before so the events aren't exactly the same as in the show.


Each a monster, part 10: Oh-so-sweet-and-sanguineous-honeymoon

"What's up, Liz?"

Damon had parked pretty perilously on the side of the road when he had seen who was calling him. For that stunt, he was being glared at by Alaric, but none of them really cared. They didn't have the same danger standards as other people.

"Listen, I'm not sure about anything. But as you already know, since you've been asking for more than two months now, I've been gathering clues about the most gruesome murders since your brother... well, you know what I mean. Some of them put aside, I've got a general and believable trail. The last one leads us in Tennesse."

Alaric and Damon had been on the roads for almost three months, looking after hints about Stefan and his happy trip to the land of the Rippers and contacting some of Damon's associates, but they had had no luck until now. Lately, Liz Forbes had joined them in their joyful and bloody quest, though she was staying in Mystic Falls.

"Any specifics?"

"From what I know, the bodies are in pieces, and the scene is covered in blood. No one saw anything, And the police is only starting to take a look."

Damon sighed loudly. If the authorities were already aware of the murders, it wouldn't be easy to sneak in and gather informations.

"Thanks, Liz. Tell me the location, and we're on our way."

"We?"

Of course, Damon had said nothing about what he liked to call his Oh-so-sweet-and-sanguineous-honeymoon, causing Ric to roll his eyes and even, sometimes, to punch him lightly. So Liz had no idea he had gotten the history teacher back, only informing her that the man had "health issues" and wouldn't be back to school before the end of the term. No need to say Alaric hadn't approved, but since they could maybe stop a rabid vampire from killing innocent people, and he had no valid explanation for his disappearance, he had eventually complied.

The vampire grinned at the cellphone, oblivious to the fact that smiles weren't sent through phone networks. Somehow, the Mystic Falls' sheriff figured out he was smirking, and said she didn't want to know anything about anything, especially if it involved bloody vampires and psychopathic friends.

Damon glanced at Ric, and wondered how much this statement could be true while being so clearly false. The hunter wasn't a vampire and wasn't exactly psychopathic, but he had proved himself to be quite bloody at times, and he certainly was his friend.

Friend, best friend, boyfriend.

Well, for the man to be all this to Damon, he surely had to be different.

Alaric glared at the vampire.

"I'm certain I don't want to know what the sheriff said if it's about me."

Damon gave Ric his most innocent smile and almost leaned on him.

"Why is that? Compliments, sweetheart, I swear."

"If you consider it a compliment, it surely means it would be a shame for any proper human being."

Damon vamped out just for the hell of it, and his left hand searched for the man's shoulder. When he felt the Falkenbach scar through the fabric of Alaric's shirt, he smiled widely, allowing his fangs to be seen.

"We're not proper human beings. I'm not human, you're not proper. Deal with it, Love."

"You meant to say you were neither human nor proper, didn't you?"

"As if. Enough talking, we're going to Tennessee. I'm driving."

The hunter looked at the vampire, slightly bored. He wished he had something to do, even grading despairing essays if it came to that, but something to do. He still felt under stress after his return to Boston, his meeting with Landyn and Theodoric, and let's not forget about the time during which his new boyfriend had been supposed to be a dead new boyfriend.

"You're always driving."

Damon arched an eyebrow, and started the car. They had to get going if they wanted to be there for Elena's birthday. No matter how much he complained about the girl's heroine complex, he still cared about her. Most of the time, it wasn't exactly her fault that she had to make shitty choices. When one only got to choose between betting their own lives and getting other persons to die, it was understandable that they would choose a way that wouldn't please everyone.

"It's my car."

"I was only saying that you don't need to state your point every time."

They squabbled for almost an hour before finally staying silent, glaring daggers at each other, and occasionally ogling each other.

The house Liz Forbes had told Damon about was in the countryside, but they couldn't have missed it unless they had been driving on the wrong road. Yellow police tape was all over the house, several police cars were parked near, a forensic team was completely bewildered at what they had seen and discussing it with a sightly sick look on their faces.

Damon drove past the house and parked not too far away, but still far enough not to be seen.

The vampire could get them in with compulsion, but compelling so many people was a bit tricky, especially if he were to forget someone. He looked with hope at Alaric, who rolled his eyes and searched the car's trunk for more suitable clothes.

"Don't tell me you never played cop before?"

Damon smirked at the question and tried his best to look smug. No need to say it didn't take him much effort. Smugness was his natural state, as Ric had said at dinner.

"I did use handcuffs and a policeman cosplay, but it was mostly in bed, if you know what I mean..."

The hunter ignored him and grabbed a black suit in his suitcase. It'd look a bit wrinkled, but as to get to the house one had to come by car, it wouldn't be so odd.

Of course, Damon didn't turn so that he could change in private.

"Instead of ogling me, get changed too. I don't want to try and pass us as detectives with you looking like a pimp."

Damon was about to answer back as soon as Alaric began talking, but when he heard the shameful word, he only stayed with his mouth wide open for some time. Then he looked at his expensive-and-totally-open-black shirt, stared at his grey-and-totally-showing-his-hip-bones pants, and wondered why Ric was being so vehement about it. The fact that he certainly didn't look like a police officer passed by his brain, but he liked it better to think the hunter was becoming possessive.

But still.

"I don't look like a pimp."

Alaric raised an eyebrow but didn't bother to look at him, going through Damon's stuff in search of something less inappropriate to wear. The task proved to be arduous.

"I look like a freaking model."

"You do realize cops don't wear thousands-dollars shirts, don't you?"

Damon pouted but took the grey suit his boyfriend was handing him, reluctantly agreeing to change into it. He liked the suit, but he didn't like to be told what to do. Even if Ric was right.

"They do. In cop shows."

"And we're not in a cop show, so you behave. And even if cop shows' cops wear thousands-dollars shirts, it's still appropriate clothing."

The vampire mumbled something about flower patterns and Miami, but refrained himself from talking back. Alaric wasn't even so interested in the matter, and it was him who had the argument going on.

The hunter took away the black glasses Damon was considering, saying they weren't playing Men in Black, and they walked to the house.

A policeman tried to stop them, Damon compelled him into obeying Ric's directions who knew better. The man managed to make it look like they were here to talk to the detectives in charge of the case, and seemed utterly sorry when he heard they weren't there anymore. Then he accidently let a slip of the tongue inform the policeman there had been other similar cases in the nearest states, one of them being their own, and that the highter-ups were thinking of handing the cases over to the FBI, if the murders appeared to have been commited with the same modus operandi. It was such a shame they couldn't take a look, simply to see if they were so similar.

Damon snorted as the policeman let them him, asking them to be cautious. Of course, the man was compelled, and would never have prevented them from coming in even if Alaric had told him crap, but that way he could still explain why he had let them in if someone asked – possibly the compulsion would have convinced him they had shown him their "FBI badges", or some other excuse. Hopefully no one would, but it was a precaution for the man's future.

Ric was so caring that the vampire would end up being jealous of a pebble one of these days.

When they were finally alone, they started studying the house. The bodies had been removed, but there was no mistaking it: someone had died in here, and the killer hadn't exactly cleaned the place. Blood splashes had colored half of the walls and furnitures in dark red, and pools of dried blood could be seen near the sofa. No wonder the forensics guys were so puzzled.

Alaric glanced at Damon when the vampire grumbled.

"Definitely him."

"I would never have believed... And usually, I'm pretty good at reading people..."

The vampire sneered, watching a bloodied mat closely.

"Don't worry, Ric. You're a wonder when it comes to evaluating someone. But Stefan... It's like there are two of him, really. I guess it's because he never truly accepted being a vampire, a blood-sucking monster, because he never forgave himself for killing the first human he killed, namely, our father, because he's always going to blame himself for making me as I am, the frantic vampire killer. When he snaps... he's not here anymore, he's... someone else. Even you can't see it behind the real him... unless the other one is the real him, I'm not sure about that..."

Damon pulled the mat aside and found a hatch in the floor.

"Why are you always trying to get him to drink human blood if you know it triggers him off?"

The vampire sighed. Of course, Alaric wasn't stupid. The hunter knew Damon well enough to hear in his voice how much he cared for his little brother.

Even when he had been trying to destroy Stefan's life, after the first – and as he knew now not last – Katherine fiasco, Damon had felt sorry for forcing his brother. He had hated Stefan. But what the young vampire had become after turning, the thing he had forced him to be once again in the early twentieth century... Well, it had been no fun to destroy this thing. After all, the Ripper of Monterrey couldn't be destroyed, as he already wasn't feeling anything. Stefan had been quick to switch off his humanity.

And to be frank, Damon hated him, back then, but at the same time...

No matter.

"The thing is, I'm certain he only has to accept what and who he is, and then, no more Ripper. But no, he's too afraid to do that... And now, we have this kind of problem to deal with."

"Maybe we'd better put the house on fire, if the police hasn't found the hatch yet."

Alaric and Damon were staring at what was obviously a werewolf's claws marks.

"Not a good idea. They saw the worst already, and this particular piece of evidence won't disappear with a mere fire. We should as well let them work and try to guess what exactly could have done... that."

The hunter looked around once more and nodded.

Stefan had done quite a show in the house.

They left the crime scene with a polite nod to the confused policeman waiting outside, not sure anymore why he had let them in, and walked to the Camaro. They were long gone when the man realized something didn't add up.

As Damon was driving like a mad man in the direction of Mystic Falls, they wondered why Klaus could be searching for werewolves. The idea of other hybrids didn't sit well with neither of them.

One was enough of a pain in the ass.

"Maybe we'll be home on time for Elena's birthday. Last time she called she was so angry I didn't even get a chance to tell her you were with me."

Ric sneered at that.

"Or maybe you didn't want her to urge you to take me back instead of going on your little... I quote, 'Oh-so-sweet-and-sanguineous-honeymoon'."