It was 4:00 A.M. and Dante was sitting at his computer doing the thing that has caused insomnia across the world: stumbling (dramatic lightning flashes outside dun, dun, duuuun!). Ever since he had gotten Stumble, he hadn't been able to stop. He looked so bad, even fangirls might have run away. He had huge bags beneath his eyes, his eyelids were only half-open, and his hair was even more untidy than usual. In short, he looked like a zombie only without the rotting, but if he stumbled too much longer that could start too. I'll hit the button one more time... he thought. But he knew he had thought that a thousand times by now. He had been thinking that since Monday, when he had first found StumbleUpon. com, now it was Wednesday and he hadn't stopped stumbling since then. Well, he'd had a few breaks. All of those had been when he had fallen asleep at his computer desk. Those didn't last long though, cause he would fall out of the chair and smash his head into the floor. Now let's get back to the story. Dante slowly moved the mouse to the infamous blue and green stumble! button. He clicked on it and then waited for the page to load. It loaded fanfiction. net. A fanfic? Hey, it's about me and Vergil! He thought in surprise. The title was A Different Kind of Brotherly Love. What's that supposed to mean? He wondered. He would soon find out (thunder clash dun dun duuun!). He began to read it. (AN: I'm not actually going to go into detail about what the fanfic said. All I'll say is that it's an M rated, extremely detailed yaoi fanfic between Dante and Vergil). As Dante read his eyes grew wider and wider in horror until it looked like they might pop out of his head. Before he could even read half of it he had to grab a trash can and puke into it. What sick person would post this!? He wondered in horror. Then he saw the screen name. It was HotBlondDevil. I wonder... it couldn't be her, could it? No, there's no way she'd go that far, anyway, I'm sure there's plenty of girls that would name themselves that... never thought of her as the writing type anyway... he thought. He shut off his computer and then went to his bed. As he was falling asleep he realized something. Hey! The sheer horror of that fanfic cured me of my addiction to stumble! I can finally sleep peacefully... he thought as he drifted off to sleep.


8:00 the Next Morning


"Noooooo! Get away from meeeee!" Dante wailed as he awoke from a horrible nightmare about, well, I think you can guess. He sat up shaking and sweating with a terrified look on his face. I'll never stumble again! He promised himself. He walked downstairs to find Trish waiting for him.

"Dante, did you know you screamed like a girl?" she asked with a grin.

"Shut up..." he growled drowsily.

"Had a rough night? Well, I hope you don't get any promising customers, you'll scare them all off," she said.

"Whatever... I think pizza might make me feel a little better," he said as he headed toward the fridge.

"Pizza for breakfast? You're hopeless..." Trish said with a sigh. After he had eaten some pizza, took a nap, ate a strawberry sundae, and then took another nap, he felt better. He walked back upstairs to his computer so he could check his email. He was replying to an email from Lady (the email said,

So when are you going to pay me back for that bike you destroyed? and his reply was,

Seeing as you shot me in the head twice after I saved your butt I don't think I owe you anything :p) when he started thinking about that fanfic and its author. He thought about the screen name and his suspicions. I wonder if I could sneak onto her computer and find out if it was her... It's worth a shot! he thought. He was wondering when he would get the chance to get on her computer when he heard her call up to him.

"Dante, I'm going clothes shopping with Lady, see you later!" she yelled.

This is perfect! He thought happily. "Okay, I'll see ya!" he yelled back. He listened for the sound of the door closing and then he snuck into her room. He walked over to the computer and saw, to his disappointment, the password screen. Crap, now what? I guess I just start typing till I find the right one he thought with a sigh. After a while, he managed to get the right password. Yes! Now then, to find out of she's the author of that abomination, I'll go to the site and then I'll see if she's signed in he decided. He typed out the site name and then crossed his fingers. "Please be signed in, please be signed in," he chanted. The site popped up and sure enough, it was her. When he looked at her list of written stories it was there. "I was right! I can't believe she's that sick in the head! I'll make her pay!" he shouted.


Later That Day


"Hey Dante! I'm back!" Trish shouted as she walked through the door. Dante was sitting on the couch, giving her a look that could kill. "What's wrong? Out of pizza?" she joked nervously.

"I found something interesting on the internet the other day," he said with an evil look in his eyes.

"W-what do you mean?" she asked.

"I think it was called A Different Kind of Brotherly Love written by HotBlondDevil. You wouldn't happen to know her would you?" he asked menacingly.

"Um, s-sorry, don't know her, hoping for a date?" Trish said as she giggled nervously.

"I know you wrote that sick thing! It gave me nightmares worse than the ones I had when my mother died!" he shouted.

"I'm sorry! It was a joke! That's just something human women seem to like! Don't blame me, blame all the fangirls that wrote the reviews, they're the ones who are into that kind of thing!" Trish begged.

"I'll let you live, but there will be consequences. You are no longer welcome here, and if I ever see a, what did you call it? Yaoi? Fanfic again I'll kill you!" Dante shouted.

"I-I'll pack my stuff and leave right n-now!" Trish yelled as she dashed upstairs. She soon came back downstairs with one bag of clothes and darted out the door before Dante had time to react.

I'm going to delete that stupid fanfic off the web forever! He decided. He went to her computer and was about to delete the fanfic when he noticed she had other stories. "What's this? DantexTrish? I might have liked that if I hadn't seen the VergilxDante first..." he grumbled. "Huh? DantexJester...No...No...No!..she wouldn't...she couldn't! She did! I'll kill her!" Dante roared. He then ran out the door after her.


Several Days Later


Trish had disappeared. He couldn't find her anywhere. She must have hid, knowing I would find out eventually he thought. I wish I could find all of these stinkin fangirls and make them pay! I've read the reviews. I know what monsters they are! Hmmm, I wonder if I could set a trap... he thought. He then got an idea. It just might work! he thought. Vergil was checking his email (which was always empty for some reason...) when he saw an email from Dante.

Why would brother send me an email? He wondered. It said,

Brother, I know we don't see eye to eye, who am I kidding we hate each other, but I need you to help me rid the world of a danger that threatens both you and me. You'll understand when you click on the link.

"That's strange... I guess I should check it out," Vergil said with a sigh. He clicked on the link and then began to read. He ran over to a window and puked out of it. "What is this!?" he exclaimed. He quickly replied to the email asking Dante what he wanted him to do. He got a very quick response. It said:

meet me at the Devil May Cry. I've got a plan for destroying those accursed fangirls. Vergil agreed and then went to bed knowing he would have nightmares.


The Next Day


"So, what's your plan, brother?" Vergil asked.

"We start out by emailing them a link to a fanfic we write and saying it's great yaoi. When they come to it, we use a virus I created to track down their exact location and then we kill them!" Dante started laughing maniacally.

"How did you create this virus? You're not exactly the smartest person I know, scratch that, you're an idiot, so how did you manage to make this?" Vergil asked in amazement.

"I'll ignore that... But anyway, it seems when I snapped after seeing the Dantex- never mind you don't need to know, my mind became clearer and I decided I would do and could do anything to make those fangirls pay!" Dante said.

"That doesn't make any sense..."

"Since when did I make sense?"

"You've got a point," Vergil agreed.


Several Hours Later


Vergil and Dante had tracked down a ton of girls with their plan. They had emailed them a link to a fake yaoi fanfic that was actually just a long story going on and on about how wonderful pizza is. Of course, the girls would click on the link thinking they would get to see yaoi, and then they would read it hoping it would convert to yaoi while Dante and Vergil used the program to track them down. It worked for a while until the girls started warning each other. So then Vergil emailed them instead only this time it was a story going on and on about how humans suck and demons are far superior. This one didn't last as long cause the girls were more prepared but they found the locations of a few more girls. Then they got the list of addresses and split up. "We'll meet back at the Devil May Cry. Kill as many as you can," Vergil said.

"Don't have to tell me twice!" Dante yelled as he ran off to go slay fangirls.


Sometime Late at Night


"What took you so long?" Vergil asked as an exhausted but happy looking Dante came through the door.

"I found that fangirl hunting is as fun and rewarding as demon hunting! You can steal their wallets after you've killed them so you still get paid. And I know I'm doing the world a favor so I don't feel bad at all!" Dante said cheerfully.

"I think you need some sleep. I need some too, and some Tylenol because my head hurts after hearing all those fangirl squeals," Vergil said.

"Well, see you in the mor-" Dante stopped and stared in horror out the window.

"What's wrong?" Vergil asked. Dante didn't reply. Vergil turned to look and then he started staring in horror as well. There were thousands of them. Fangirls surrounded the entire shop. All with psychotic expressions.

"W-what's going on? Why are they here? H-how could they know? What do we do!?" Dante screamed.

"Calm down! I'm sure we can handle them. We'll just have to barricade ourselves inside and shoot, in my case stab, out the window. They can't kill us. They're only humans," Vergil said, trying to reassure him.

"We're not here to kill you. We're going to *the last half of this sentence is censored*" one fangirl said.

"Noooo! Anything but that! We've got to get out of here!" Dante sobbed.

"Oh quit your whining! We are the sons of Sparda! We can handle these girls!" Vergil snapped.

"We can't! We're doomed!" Dante screamed. Vergil calmly walked over and smacked him. He blinked at Vergil.

"Get over yourself, we can simply go devil trigger and fly away if we have to. But I think we should kill them first."

"I vote for running away! Do you see how many there are? I won't risk them doing 'that' to us!" Dante exclaimed.

"Dante, I recently found a fanfic that was named The Forbidden Love. It was DantexMundus," Vergil stated.

"They must die!" Dante screamed as he kicked the door down and ran outside, firing Ebony and Ivory.

That worked... Vergil thought. They both killed as many fangirls as they could. However, there were too many and they both, to their embarrassment, were forced to go devil trigger to stay out of their reach. Eventually, they killed almost all of them. A few got away, but that wasn't too much of a problem. Vergil and Dante shook hands.

"It was great to get to work together," Dante said.

"I'm proud of you, little brother. You've finally killed some humans," Vergil said. Then they noticed several half dead fangirls staring at them. They looked down and realized they were holding hands.

"Ugh! Get away from me!" they both shouted as they leaped away from each other.