Characters:
Jett 'Australia' Kirkland
Arthur 'England' Kirklamd
Steve [Jett's koala]

Pairings; British family

Summary; Jett is passed out in his garden, and Arthur is concerned.


Kentucky, Australia, 1996

"Jett?" Arthur shakes Jett gently, "Jett, lad, are you alright?"

Jett groans, sitting up slowly. "What happened? Why are you here?"

"You went five whole minutes without uploading an animal video to myspace, we were worried about you," Arthur says, "What the hell happened?"

Jett sits up fully, looking around. The pair are in Jett's garden, where Jett has been laid for almost half an hour, unconscious, blood dribbling from his nose.

"I have no idea what happened," Jett says.

Arthur scans the garden, Sherlock senses tingling. The garden looks normal. Lawn. Treehouse with a couple of swings. Steve asleep in the sun. Kangaroo shit. Jett. Blood. Boomerang.

"Did you get sun stroke, lad?" he asks, helping Jett to his feet.

"No, I'm not dehydrated," Jett says, "My head just hurts."

"What were you doing?"

"Throwing my boomerang."

Arthur sighs. "Are you serious."

"I like my boomerang!"

"I know, lad. But do you remember what I used to tell about that bloody things?"

"Yeah mate!" Jett straightens up, pursing his lips and glaring down his nose at a random patch of grass. "One of these days, boy," he says in his best English accent, "You won't catch it and it will smack you straight in the face."

Arthur raises an eyebrow. "And what do you think's happened?"

Jett stares at him, then the boomerang on the grass. "Why do I taste blood?"

"Your nose is still bleeding love."

"Oh. I'm gonna sue."

"What?"

"I'm gonna sue."

"Who?"

"Me."

Arthur stares at him. "I don't think that a thing people can do."

"Not with that attitude they can't!"


Based on a true story.
Larry Rutman, a man from Kentucky, hit himself in the head with his own boomerang and sued himself. He won 400,000 Aussie dollars (300,000 American dollars/£205,000/€290,000) all paid out by his insurance company. He wanted to sue the boomerang manufacturer but his lawyer advised him against it.
I don't think he broke his nose though. I just added that to better match what Arthur said.

Headcannons;
Arthur is a mother hen
Jett can mimic most of the things Arthur used to tell him not to do. Mostly because Jett would do it anyway, so Arthur would tell him several times.
Jett is stubbornly optimistic, and a little spiteful against Arthur in particular. If anyone (especially Arthur) tells him he can't do something, Jett will absolutely do it just so he can rub it in Arthur's face.
Jett loves animals, and since the internet became a thing he constantly uploads videos of animals around his home. He's in a Cute Animals school with several other nations, including Dylan/Wales and Xien Leon/Hong Kong.

I own nothing
Everyone hates Arthur
-Laurel Silver