Disclaimer – Still own nothing. Only one more chapter after this. It makes me a little sad. This chapter is a little (very) emotional, but I hope you all enjoy it. The song used is Tell Your Heart to Beat Again by Danny Gokey, which I highly recommend listening to while reading this chapter.

Chapter 17

Tell Your Heart to Beat Again

You're shattered, like you've never been before, the life you knew, in a thousand pieces on the floor

Maggie wasn't surprised when Hal woke up with a gasp on his lips and panic in his eyes. He had been doing it a lot lately. It was obvious that, though machine worked, Hal still remembered something that was haunting him far more than he'd like to admit.

It had been two days since he woke up cured of the drug's effects, but every time he fell asleep, he woke up only two or three hours later from nightmares. He was beginning to look a lot worse than he was before, even though the nasal canal and IV had been removed.

"You okay?" Maggie asked, getting off the chair, moving to sit on the edge of the bed beside Hal.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm good." Hal said absently, moving to sit up on the bed. It still hurt a bit to move, but it had gotten easier the more he did it.

Maggie waited until he got more settled sitting up, before grabbing his hand. He turned to look at her and gave her a reassuring smile.

"When do you have to go?" Hal asked. Maggie had told him yesterday about her decision to get her spikes out, and that the surgery was going to happen today.

"Whenever Anne comes and gets me." Maggie answered, giving him a smile in return. Hal nodded, keeping his gaze on her. Maggie was about to ask him why he was staring at her, when he leaned forward and kissed her.

Hal was about to pull away, but Maggie brought her hands to rest on the back of his head and kissed him back.

"Hey Maggie, OH!" Hal and Maggie pulled apart when hearing Anne's voice and looked to see both Anne and Tom coming through the door.

"You guys could knock you know." Hal told them, getting annoyed with the constant interruptions. Tom sheepishly brought up his fist and knocked on the door.

"Sorry. Ready Maggie?" Anne inquired. Maggie nodded, and after giving Hal a quick peck on his cheek, she got up off the bed and followed Anne out of the room, shutting the door behind them. Tom and Hal were left alone.

"How are you feeling?" Tom questioned, coming over to stand by the bed.

"I'm good." Hal lied through his teeth, which Tom immediately caught.

"Been sleeping okay?" Tom pressed, seeing the dark circles under Hal's eyes.

"Yeah." Hal answered, knowing one word lies were easier to convince someone, though from the look on his Dad's face, it was clear that it wasn't working.

"Hal, just stop. Tell me the truth. I know you haven't been sleeping." Hal was slightly surprised by Tom's bluntness. He wondered if his Dad was going to push, he usually didn't, but Hal assumed that given everything that had happened the last few weeks, his struggling had been far more obvious than it used to be.

"I'm -"

"Don't you dare say that you are fine, Hal. Don't lie to me." Tom said, looking at his son. Dark marks, almost like bruises took up the space underneath Hal's eyes, and his once bright, expressive eyes were now filled with exhaustion and emptiness. How could he have allowed this to happen?

"You are tired, and you are still hurt. You need to rest, okay?" Hal nodded, and laid back down on the bed, but didn't close his eyes.

It was then that Tom remembered what Maggie had told him, about Hal's nightmares. So Tom sat down on the chair beside the bed. Hal looked over at him curiously.

"Go to sleep Hal. I'll be here when you wake up." Hal turned his head over to his father, and let exhaustion claim him.

FSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFS

"You can do it Hal. You can fight it." Matt's voice sounded so confident, but the bug in his head wouldn't stop. Hal was trying, he was trying so hard, but the bug was so strong.

"Hal." Tom called out, making Hal turn to point the gun at his Dad.

"Give me the gun." Tom pleaded, holding his hand out of the weapon. Tears still falling down his face, making his vision blurry, as the bug took back any control Hal had left, and made Hal pull the trigger.

FSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFS

And words fall short in times like these, when this world drives you to your knees, you think you're never gonna get back, to the you that used to be

Hal awoke with a scream, immediately sitting up in the bed despite the painful protest of his muscles. The nightmare was still playing in Hal's head, he didn't even hear his Dad call out to him, didn't even register his presence until he felt Tom's hands on his back and shoulder.

The young man jumped a little, then looked to see that it was just his Dad.

"It's okay Hal. It was just a dream." Tom tried to comfort him, but Hal shook his head, moving around so his legs were dangling over the side of the bed, muttering, "No it wasn't."

"Hal, what's going on? Please, just tell me how I can help." Tom asked, sitting down on the bed between Hal and the pillow he was resting on.

For a few, drawn out minutes, Hal didn't say anything. He just sat, staring at the floor while Tom rubbed his back, waiting patiently for Hal to open up.

"The first time, the Overlord had me drugged, I dreamed, remembered, when I was 12. When I fell off my bike and broke my arm." Hal told him.

"I remember that. You did a good job, I thought I was going to throw up when I saw how bad it was." Tom remembered.

"The second time, it was the day," Hal paused, taking a deep breath, then finished, "it was the day Mom died."

"Oh, Hal." Tom stopped rubbing Hal's back in shock. He knew how terrible that day had to have been for Hal. It was hard for all of them. Tom however, was so filled with grief himself that he didn't really take the time to comfort his sons. Hal ended up doing that.

"The third time was," Hal broke off again, feeling tears beginning to well up in his eyes, and his jaw tightened, trying to hold back the pain that was starting to overwhelm him.

"The third time was, in Charleston. I remembered, the bug, and," Hal stopped talking, as tears started falling. Tom immediately pulled Hal into his arms and held him, feeling his chest become wet with his son's tears.

With broken sentences, and through harsh sobs, Hal told his Dad everything. About what he had thought were nightmares with Karen were really about, what she had made him do, why he had been paralyzed, helping Karen kidnap Anne and Lexi, holding his family hostage, and having the bug removed.

Tom held him securely, feeling tears of his own starting to fall down his face. He was so ashamed of himself for not thinking that Hal's being bugged would be one of the things Hal would've remembered.

When Hal had woken up after that painful surgery with no memory of being controlled, Tom pushed it out of his mind, knowing that it wasn't his son's fault, and that it was already hard enough hearing about what he had done without actually knowing for sure. So Tom and everybody else never brought it up, all wanting to forget about it.

Now Hal remembered, and it was hitting him even harder than Tom could've ever imagined.

"Listen to me Hal, it wasn't your fault, okay? None of it. And we are all okay, alright. I love you. It wasn't your fault. It was out of your control. No one blames you. It wasn't your fault." Tom whispered in Hal's ear, but his son continued to cry.

FSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFS

Beginning, just let that word wash over you, it's alright now, love's healing hands have pulled you through

Tom wasn't exactly sure when Hal stopped crying and finally settled down. He didn't let go of Hal though, and Hal made no move either, he just laid down against Tom's chest, so still and quiet that Tom was sure he had fallen asleep.

It was then the door to the room opened, and in came Anne. When she saw the position that the father and son had found themselves in, she grew concerned.

"Is he okay?" Anne asked.

"He will be, just not yet." Tom answered, and then felt Hal stir in his arms. Hal opened his eyes and looked around, seeing that his stepmother was in the room with him.

"I'm just going to go talk to Anne, I'll be right back okay?" Tom told Hal, who nodded, then moved a little to allow Tom room to get off the bed.

The Mason father got up, but pressed a kiss to Hal's forehead before leaving the room with Anne.

"What happened?" Anne questioned, and Tom told her. He told her what Hal remembered, but he didn't go into any details, knowing that it was hard enough for Hal to tell him and he probably wasn't ready for everyone else to know about it.

"Oh my. Hasn't he been through enough?" Anne commented to herself, unable to imagine what he was going through.

"Was there something you needed?" Tom asked.

"Just to tell you that Matt and Ben are back from that scouting mission Weaver sent them on. Are you going to tell them?"

"I'll tell them he remembers being controlled, but that's it. They don't need to know the details. If Hal wants to tell them that later, that's his decision, but I think right now, he needs to know that Ben and Matt don't blame him either." Tom decided, "Will you watch him, just until I get back?"

Anne nodded, and he gave her a quick kiss, then left to go find his other two sons, while she went back into the hospital room.

"Did everything go okay with Maggie?" Hal asked the minute he saw her come in, pulling himself to sit up on the bed.

"Oh yeah, she's good. She'll be up soon. One of the nurses is with her." Anne replied, coming over to him before sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Hal, none of us blame you for what happened in Charleston. We know it wasn't your fault." Hal looked down at his lap, but Anne put her hand up his chin and pulled his face up so he'd have to look at her.

"I don't blame you for helping Karen. It wasn't you fault. Karen could've easily made Lourdes take me and Lexi too. It's not your fault, okay?" Hal nodded, but Anne could see he wasn't going to be so easily swayed. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tight.

There had been very few hugs between them. Hal had always been so strong, and so determined to never show any sign of weakness. She had only hugged him twice, the first time was a few weeks after Tom had boarded the alien spaceship, leaving him alone to take care of his brothers. The second time, when Maggie was injured.

Neither time did he ever really hug her back, until now, Anne realized as she felt his arms wrap around her, returning her embrace.

FSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFSFS

So get back up, take step one, leave the darkness, feel the sun, cause your story's far from over, and your journey's just begun

Hal and Maggie sat beside each other on the hospital bed. She had come in about an hour after he had talked to Anne. Since then, he had told her about what he remembered, and what the nightmares he had in Charleston were actually about, which was something he hadn't done.

Maggie so far, took it all in silence. Hal was nervous and scared, she hadn't said a word to him at all since he had told her. He wondered if this was how she had felt when she had told him about her past.

"Hal, do you remember when we first met?" Maggie asked.

"You mean when you took me and the group captive and kicked my a**? Yes, I do remember that." Hal answered.

"Do you remember what I said when I helped you guys though?" Maggie questioned, finally looking up at him, pain and understanding shining in her beautiful eyes. Hal searched his brain for a moment, before realizing what she was talking about. He lowered his head and nodded.

"We can't control what life throws our way. Sometimes, terrible things happen that scars us, changes us and completely turns our life around, if we let it. What they did to me wasn't my fault, and what happened to you wasn't your fault either. Karen making you do all of that, doesn't make any of it real. Those were not your actions or your feelings, just like what those guys did to me wasn't my actions or feelings. The only thing we can do, is decide if we're are going to let it affect us, and I most definitely am not going to let affect me. I do not blame you for what happened. I love you Hal Mason, that is what I feel." Maggie said, placing her hand against his neck.

"I love you too." Hal whispered, lowering his head to hers, and pressed his lips against hers. It was a kiss that neither wanted to pull away from, a kiss that showed each other just how much they loved and missed each other.

Ultimately, it was Maggie who ended up pulling away, pushing her hand against Hal's chest.

"As much as I'd love to continue this conversation, before I came here, I ran into you Dad who told me that he, and your brothers are coming to see you soon, and I'm pretty sure they don't want to see this." Maggie told him.

"Seriously? I'm beginning to think they, and Anne are all involved in some convoluted plan or something." Hal groaned.

Just as Maggie had said, there was a knock on the door and it opened, before Hal or Maggie could say anything. Matt came in first, followed by Ben and Tom.

Matt came running over to his big brother and threw his arms around Hal, who did his best not to grunt in pain, he had missed Matt's hugs.

"I don't blame you, never did, never will." Matt said, voice muffled in the embrace. Hal bent down and laid a kiss on his baby brother's head.

A weight on Hal's shoulder made him look up to see that Ben had also came over, and placed his hand on his shoulder. Ben smiled at Hal, and that was all Hal needed to see to know that Ben didn't blame him either.

Hal moved one arm away from Matt and wrapped it instead, around Ben's waist, pulling him into the hug, which Ben returned, one arm around Hal, and the other around Matt.

Tom stood by and watched his boys for a moment, before coming over to them, and laid his hand on Hal's shoulder, and Maggie, lifted her hand and started to rub Hal's back. No words were said, because no words were needed.

Hours later, after the sun had set, Hal and Maggie laid down in each others arms in the hospital bed alone in the room, Hal pressed a kiss on the sleeping woman's temple.

"I love you Maggie, with all my heart, mind, body, and soul." He whispered gently, before letting his head rest on the pillow.

He had just closed his eyes when he heard Maggie whisper back, "I love you Hal, with all my heart, mind, body, and soul."

Hal fell asleep with a smile on his face, and had no nightmares, for the first time in weeks.

Tell your heart to beat again, close your eyes and breathe it in, let the shadows fall away, step into the light of grace, yesterday's a closing door, you don't live there anymore, say goodbye to where you've been, and tell your heart to beat again

AN – I am sad now, there is only one chapter left. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, and chapter 18, the very last chapter will be up, hopefully soon. I do have busy week ahead of me, so it might be awhile.