So sorry for the long wait for the update! Life is a bit hectic at the moment! I came home from a semester away just in time for Christmas and I still had work to submit. Now my family and I are moving and renovating a house. Between packing and getting ready for a new semester, I don't know whether I am coming or going!

I debating splitting this one into two chapters, but since it took so long to get it out I am going to post it all at once. Please review?

Another Christmas come and gone and I still don't own Harry Potter. I am beginning to think Santa doesn't read my letters.


Remus was nervous. He was sitting at the bar of the Hog's Head tapping his fingers on the neck of the bottle with such ferocity the people at the bar were beginning to throw him irritated glances. After Teddy had left, he read the Daily Prophet article. Well, "article" was holding it in too high estimation. It was a tabloid fantasy at best. According to R. Skeeter, Dora had clapped eyes on him and immediately demanded a private room, which admittedly, she had. However, Remus knew Dora's intention was to interrogate him and arrest him. Skeeter then reported that she had immediately taken him home with her. Skeeter suspected some sort of mind control or love potion, because her passionate response to a werewolf, of all people, was so strong. Skeeter told readers to expect a happy announcement of a vow renewal soon. He sighed again. He was not sure what to make of Dora's reaction to it the other day, and how well it boded for their upcoming "date." He could see why she did not want Teddy reading it, even though most of the innuendos would go over his head.

Dora should be arriving in a few minutes. He caught Aberforth's eye, and he led him to a room upstairs. Dora had decided that they should meet here instead of the Three Broomsticks because it was less crowded. Aberforth was impossibly ancient now, making him an even less diligent barman than before. He sat at the small table in Aberforth's dining room to wait. His eyes shifted between the clock and the door.

Dora walked through the door exactly two minutes late. She sat in the chair across the table before Remus could even stand up, saving them both the awkward business of deciding between a handshake, a hug, or—Merlin!—maybe even a kiss on the cheek.

"Good evening, Dora," he greeted.

"Tonks, Remus," she corrected absently, "Good evening."

She did not look like it was a good evening for her, and her expression made Remus think that it was very unlikely he would have a good evening, either. It was closed and guarded. The wrinkle between her brows she got when she was stressed was pronounced. Her mouth was fixed in a straight line. It did not look good at all.

"So, how have you been?" As soon as he said it, Remus realized just how dim it sounded and hated himself for saying it.

"Fine," Dora said, "You?"

"I have been fine as well. Where's Teddy this evening?"

"My Mum's."

"Oh, that's nice. How is she?"

"Fine."

"I'm glad to hear it."

"Listen, Remus…"

"Yes?" he asked hopefully.

"I think we should just cut to the chase. We didn't come to do the scripted small talk."

"Okay," he answered, a thrill on anticipation fluttering in his stomach.

He watched her rummaging in her bag. Her light, quick fingers flicked through the messy stack of papers until she pulled out an envelope. She dropped it on the table between them with a dull thud.

"What's that, Dora?" he asked with foreboding.

"Divorce papers," she answered flatly, "And what did I tell you about calling me Dora?"

His heart twisted painfully and all of his hopes fell to pieces. "Why now? Why after all of these years?"

"Why not?" she asked dryly, but then her voice softened, as did her face, "I've moved on, Remus. This is what I need from you now."

"What if I say no?" he countered childishly.

She fell back in her chair with a huff. He suddenly realized how much older she looked. All her thirty-six years and several more were painted on her face. Grey was emerging at the roots of her mousy brown hair. He knew she was not faking it to earn his sympathy That was not her way, and even after all these years he could tell when she was morphed. "Don't be this way, Remus. It's not like I packed my bags and ran out on you after a decade of wedded bliss. Signing the papers won't change anything. It is just defining our relationship."

"But why now?"

"It is what is best for Teddy," she said firmly, looking him steadily in the eyes, making Remus feel as though they were engaged in a high stakes staring contest, "It didn't matter before because you weren't around, but now that you're back I don't want him getting unrealistic expectations."

"Tonks," he pleaded, "please think this through..."

"I have thought it through, Remus. There is no point in being sentimental about something that doesn't exist anymore. Out marriage ended eleven years ago. Don't make a fuss, please. Just sign the papers."

"Don't I get a chance to look them over?"

"If you want, sure. They are pretty straight forward, though. Since we are not tied to each other financially or domestically, there is no division of assets to worry about. The only thing we need to discuss is Teddy. I am willing to share custody, if that is what you want, and I am not asking for child support. We just need to decide if we want to write visitation terms into the divorce agreement or not. I would like to keep court involvement to a minimum, for Teddy's sake."

"I'm sure we can agree on something without involving lawyers. I trust you, Dora. That was never the problem. It was…"

"I don't want to talk about what was and what wasn't, Remus. That is done and over with now. We didn't last, and that's just the way it is," Tonks interrupted brusquely, "I stopped being angry and upset a long time ago. What we need to do now is work out some sort of stable family environment for Teddy."

How could he say no? If she had moved on, then who was he to stop her? He had asked her to move on, and she had done it. He had never been so wrong about what they both wanted.

Feeling more weary and wretched than he could ever remember feeling, he drew the envelope to him and pulled out the papers. "Where do I sign?" he asked.

"I thought you wanted to look them over?" she asked.

"I trust you," he said, "Drawing this out won't make it better for anyone."

"Fair enough. I've already signed all my spots. You just sign everywhere that isn't marked for Ministry use."

He went through the document, signing the requested lines as he went. He soon came to the bottom, and the last blank. His quill hovered over the line. The document was ridiculously short, actually. This piece of paper put the final nail in the coffin for his life with Dora, and it just seemed wrong to sign it sitting quietly in the corner of private room in the Hog's Head. If he leaned back in his chair he could see the barstool where she had sat one of the first times he had met her. He closed his eyes and pressed his quill to the page. He scrawled his name without looking. When he opened his eyes, he saw their names, Nymphadora Andromeda Tonks and Remus John Lupin, written side by side, just like they had been on their marriage certificate eleven years before.

It was too much. He slid the papers across the table to her and rose from his chair. "I…" he coughed hoarsely, "I'm sorry. I have to go…"

"But we haven't decided about Teddy…"

"We'll just keep going as we are now. Why mess with something that is working? I just… I just remembered that I had an appointment. I'm sorry." He pulled on his coat and was out the door.

After she knew he was gone, Tonks buried her face in her hands. A knock at the door made her look up. She brushed away the tears that had gathered in the corners of her eyes. "Come in," she called. Aberforth appeared at the door.

"What happened in here?" he asked gruffly, "Remus just flew out of here like a bat out of Hell."

"We had a difficult discussion," she answered.

Aberforth's expression softened somewhat. "Do you want something? Tea? Firewhiskey? It is on the house."

"Better go with the whiskey. Make it a double, please, and can I borrow your owl?"

He whistled and the tawny bird flew in through the window. He placed a heavy hand on her shoulder on his way out of the room to fetch her drink. Tonks instructed the owl to take the papers to Hermione before she lost her nerve. She did not trust herself to file them. Hermione was in law; she would know what to do with them.

Tonks watched the bird fly away with the papers until it wasn't even a speck on the horizon. When she could not see it anymore, she buried her face in her hands again. That was it then. That was the bit of neat closure that she thought she had wanted—no, needed. Soon the papers would be filed and she would not be Remus' wife and he would not be her husband. But, he would always be Teddy's father. They could never say goodbye for good now that Remus was involved with Teddy. Their child would keep them together in some fashion. She didn't know if that made things better or worse.

Aberforth set the glass at her elbow and she nodded her thanks. She sipped it slowly. She felt hollow and worn-down as she never had before.

"I've called Ginny over," Aberforth said. Tonks nodded, knowing how squeamish he was with emotional women. She should have expected he would call in reinforcements. "She will be here in a few minutes." There was a pleading tone that was begging her not to fall to pieces until then.

Tonks nodded again. "Thanks. I will be fine."

A few minutes later, Tonks heard voices floating down the corridor. She recognized Aberforth's gruff, wheezing grumble and Ginny's soft whispers. She knew they were talking about her, but tried not to care. Tonks looked toward the creaking door to greet them.

"Wotcher Ginny," she said dully, "Thank you for calling her, Aberforth." The old man merely grunted in response and retreated from the room as if he had just heard that there was Fiendfyre about to escape from the fire grate. The door clicked shut and Tonks turned back to Ginny, who was now sitting in the chair Remus had so recently vacated.

"Aberforth seems to think I am about to fall to pieces," Tonks explained, gesturing to the door with a roll of the eyes.

"That would be alright, you know… If you were to fall to pieces for a bit. It might even do you good."

Tonks snorted. "I'm done falling to pieces, thank you very much. I've done that enough already. A little piece of paper should not make a bit of difference."

"It doesn't make a bit of difference what should and shouldn't be. What matters is what is. You can feel however you want to feel about it."

"But I can't, can I? I can't feel victimized this time because I am the one that asked for the divorce. I can't feel loss, because what did I lose? I can't feel relief, because it is all too sudden. Merlin! I can't even hate him like a proper ex-wife should, because… because a part of me wishes we were still together." Tonks' eyes went wide at her own admission. Of course the truth was no shock to her, but he would have rather preferred not to think about that at this particular moment.

Ginny looked slightly smug at that. "Then why don't you give it a go?" she suggested.

"I'm sorry?"

"You heard me. Why don't you give Remus one more shot? Aberforth tells me he looked pretty upset when he left here. If he screws this one up, you can still decide to kick him out on his sorry little tail."

"Because I am not stupid," Tonks deadpanned, "They say 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.' I would have to be a real idiot to fall for him a third time. Besides, Teddy…"

"…Will be going to Hogwarts soon, and while the cat's away…"

"Are you suggesting I have a fling with Remus while Teddy is away at school?" Tonks gasped.

"More of a trial run. Teddy doesn't have to get his hopes up by knowing you are dating. It is as risk free as it gets."

"Remus freaks out at commitment, not trial runs. Besides, I just asked Remus for a divorce. Turning around and asking him for a date would be sending a bit of a mixed signal, don't you think? No, after all these years, it is impossible to go back as we were."

"I don't believe in impossible," Ginny stated smoothly, "It all comes down to nerve. One of you has to move first. Here I thought you would be the bolder one."

"Age has made me wiser, and significantly less impulsive. I have made myself the fool quite enough for that man," Tonks shot back sharply, "That took enough nerve for a lifetime. It took nerve to go to war. It took nerve to raise a son on my own while working overtime repairing the ministry. That is nerve. Chasing after a man that I know will never stay? That is foolishness. So don't tell me about nerve."

"Perhaps you are right," Ginny assented meekly, "For Teddy's sake at the very least. Have you told him yet?"

"Not yet. I was going to ask Remus if he wanted to be there when I told him, but he ran out of here so fast I didn't have a chance to ask. I may have to do it alone. With or without Remus, I am telling him tomorrow."

"Well, what would you like to do now? Teddy can spend tonight with me if you want some time with your Mum, or I can stay with you if you like. We can pop in on my Mum… or we can have a girl's night on the town…"

"I don't want to make a fuss. I'm not really up for anyone's tea and sympathy. I think I will just go home and try to sort myself out."

"If you are sure…"

"I am. I'm going to go home with a bottle of wine and a carton of ice cream and I am going to run the emotional spectrum until I find something that fits."

"Alright," Ginny said skeptically, "I suppose I will leave you to it. Just don't give yourself a hangover. You and Kingsley have a meeting with the American Ministry's representatives tomorrow."

"Ugh," Tonks groaned, "Don't remind me!" I will make it a very small bottle, then. It is getting late. I had best embark on my grand emotional journey soon so I can go to bed so I can sit in a meeting tomorrow. When did I become a responsible adult?"

Ginny shrugged, "Hard to tell, it happened so fast. Goodnight, Tonks. Are you sure you couldn't do with some help finishing that ice cream? I promise not to give any more dating advice."

Tonks gave a small smile. "Perhaps I could, if only so I don't have to worry about ten extra pounds when I morph. But no wine for you; you are the designated alarm clock."

"Okay. I will just pop over to my place to tell Harry and the kids they are fending for themselves for dinner tonight. I should be back to your house by the time you tell you Mum that Teddy is staying with her tonight."

Once it was all settled, Ginny left to give Tonks time to thank Aberforth and to go talk to her Mum privately. The more she thought about the empty house waiting for her, the happier she was that Ginny was coming. With a tired sigh, Tonks stepped out in the cool summer evening to get on her way.


Don't hate me! I am very anxious about this one, so please review and tell me what you think. Thanks!