Tamaki speaks in squeaks
Haruhi walks into the Host club to see the twins cracking up in the corner, and a very flustered Tamaki surrounded by ladies. His face was sweaty and he moved his hands much more than usual, however all that was heard were odd inhalations of air. The surrounding girls laughed.
Haruhi: Why does Tamaki-senpai sound like a squeaky toy?
Kyoya: According to his vague miming, his play time with Antoinette got a little rough and he ended up inhaling the squeaker from the toy.
Haruhi: Oh no, us he going to be ok?
Kyoya: Hard to say. Though its hilarious to see him attempt to flirt with girls this way.
As Tamaki rolled through his Princely routine and leaned in to give one of the girls a kiss on the cheek, the moment was ruined by the sounds of a screaming rubber chicken.
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Monster Preparation
"Guys what are you doing?" asked a very confused Tamaki.
"Oh hey boss," said Kaoru, "Hikaru's getting ready to ram this gourd up my ass. You ready brother?"
"Ready!" called his twin who took a few steps back to get a running start.
"Um….why?" asked Tamaki concernedly.
"How else am I gonna prepare for Hikaru's monster dong to penetrate my sensitive starfish later tonight? Let 'er rip bro!"
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The Pungent Stench of Friendship
"Hey, does anyone know how long Mori-senpai has been sitting there? He's been staring out the window for a long time," said Haruhi.
"Oh, I dunno," said Hikaru.
"About three days? Maybe four?" asked Kaoru.
"Wait what?! How has nobody noticed? There could be something wrong with him!" Haruhi ran over to go check on her friend before she was stopped by Honey.
"Oh there's nothing wrong Haru-chan! Takashi's been sitting that way because he died while staring out the window! He asked me not to move him so it would be like he never left. Pretty cool right?"
Haruhi fainted. In his notebook Kyoya jotted down to buy smelling salts as well as more Febreeze.
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Unconventional Pleasures
"C'mon baby~" panted Tamaki, "One more time for daddy, you know how much I love that little thing you do." He licked his lips in anticipation as he sprawled over a dark couch in a dimly lit room.
"Ugh," sighed a deep voice that reverberated from the high ceiling, "You know I can't resist you when you look at me like that. Fine, but this is the last time." Suddenly the candles that lined the walls burst to life as their flames illuminated the room for a brief moment, before dulling themselves just enough to create sharp shadows on the walls.
A tall blond boy threw back his hood to reveal sparkling blue eyes to the candlelight.
"I've missed you, Nekozowa-senpai," said Tamaki.
"I know," said the occult-loving boy kindly. He held up his hands and Tamaki shuddered as a grin stretched its way onto his face. He hated pretending to be terrified of Nekozowa-senpai, even if he had been in the beginning. But now, Tamaki has seen a whole new side of Nekozowa that his friends just wouldn't understand. Nekozowa cleared his throat.
*Ahem ahem* "Now ladies and gentlemen," began Nekozowa in a high squeaky voice, "Let the show begin! Act 4 Scene 28: Ms Pickles visits the bakery."
Nekozowa made rabbit ears with his left hand and held it against the candle light, casting a bunny shadow on the wall. In his right hand he held a toy fish, whose shadow resembled more of a lump than a herring.
"Hello there Ms. Pickles, would you like some freshly-baked cupcakes?" he said, continuing the silly voice.
Tamaki bounced in his seat and clapped his hands excitedly. He loved his special time with Nekozowa.
