An Excellent Father


"You okay, Carrots?"

"You stole my freaking kills, Nick!"

They were playing free-for-all in Callofduty, but apparently, they've teamed up together and dominated the whole match.

"Haha, I got the final killcam, Carrots. You suck!"

"I got 12 kills and zero deaths! And you only got 8 kills and 1 death. I won, Slick, and you know it. Just admit I'm 'proer' than you."

"Oh really? I'll 1v1 you next round, dumb bunny!"

"Sniper rifles only. I'll quick scope you till you rage quit, dumb fox—"

"Dinner's ready!" announced Bonnie through the many speakers along the hallways of the house.

With that, the couple sat on wooden floor with the computer screen on the desk still displaying, 'game over.' They looked at each other for a while, gazing steady, unblinking.

"How long have we been dating?" said the fox, trying not to be awkward.

"I don't know… 3 months after you graduated?"

"Well, you started visiting me while I was in the police boot camp so technically we've been dating for almost a year now."

The bunny didn't reply. She began staring aimlessly at the computer screen, avoiding eye contact with the fox; she was speechless.

"Judy, it's gonna be fine, I mean, would your parents say 'no' just to hurt your feelings, of course not," said the fox. He tossed the PS4 controller on the bed, stood up and turned off the computer screen, as well as the PS4.

"I'll tell you what: I'll do all the talking, okay?"

The fox held the bunny's paws and lifted her up.

"Thanks. It's just that," the bunny paused for a second to think of the right words to say, "I hope they won't be so... melodramatic."

"C'mon, there's nothing to worry. Worst case scenario: your dad kicks me out of the house, and if that happens, you know what I'll say to him?"

The bunny shook his head while her eyes focused on unplugging the PS4 with the disk still in it.

"I'll be back! DUN DUN DA DUN DUN DUN" cranked the fox with his gravelly voice.

The bunny giggled as she stuffed the console and its remote controllers into her old drawstring bag, and said, "Judy, come with me if you want to live," in a not-so-gravelly voice.

They both laughed out loud.

"Hasta la vista baby"

"Quit it. You're gonna make my throat sore," coughed the bunny.

"Okay, drama queen," replied the fox as he picked up the remaining video games' cases on top of the desk, passing them to the bunny, "you forgot these."

"Oh yeah, Battlefield," said the bunny, stuffing them into her bag as well.

"You know, Carrots, you play video games; you don't like being called cute, are you sure you're a female rabbit, cause I'm starting to feel like I'm dating a—"

"'Anyone can be anything,' remember?"

"So you're a male now... let me check your genitals—" the fox started tickling the bunny who was packing beside her bed.

"Stop it Nick, stop tickling me!"

"Are you done packing; are you done being sad?" said the fox still tickling the bunny's belly.

"Alright, alright, I'm done packing; I'm fine. Let's just go now. We'll try out some of the blueberry pies that my family baked, alright? They learnt it from Gideon Grey."

"Really? I thought he was a jerk, wasn't he?"

"Well, he's doing business with us, and he thought maybe teaching us how to make his pies could improve our relationship; I tasted his pies; I know he's got some secret ingredients added to his pies, but I'm not complaining."

"Ha, he's a hillbilly but a clever one, I can tell you that... so, how far is the dining room?"

"Not far. It's located at the center of our house. Follow me, I'll show you."

After a short walk along the corridor, down the staircase, Nick followed Judy to a balcony that overlooks the dining hall.

"Wow, that's one crowded dining hall down there," said Nick.

"Yup, we're one big family... Hey look! It's Jill."

"Judy, over here!" waved Jill.

"Jill, hey there!" shouted Judy.

"Quickly, Judy, before they eat all pies."

"Sure I'll be there in a sec... That's Jill, the one wearing a short, silk scarf knotted around the neck. Come, I'll let you meet her."

The fox once more followed the bunny down the stairs, and as they walked closer to the dining hall, the more bunnies they needed to pass through.

They finally met Jill near a small flower shaped wooden table, closest to the kitchen. In front of the table was a 70 inch TV hanged on the wall.

"Judy, so nice to see you in one piece, I mean, you're now dating a fox? Wow! What's the big city life like?"

"Wow, Jill, one at a time! This is Nick!"

"Hi, nice to meet you," said the fox kindly as he shook hands with the bunny that was tall enough to reach his shoulders.

"Your boyfriend! Nice to meet you... So, Judy, how's it like living in Zootopia?"

"It's great... in terms of convenience, I mean, you don't have to drive your car to a supermarket, like there's always one just around the corner—"

"Hey, how's it going, Jude the Dude?" said William, interrupting Jill's conversation while holding a big tray of pies with his left hand.

"Hey, Will."

"And you must be Nick. I'm William, Judy's big brother," said William, shaking the fox's hand with his right hand.

"Nice to meet you," said the fox who was surprised to see that, for the first time in his life, a rabbit that was almost as equally tall as him.

"Will, go serve the pies!" yelled Jill.

"Whatever… Oh Nick, Jude the Dude here texted me, saying you like blueberries so I made this extra large, just for you," said William as he placed down four plates of pie on the small table and left in a hurry, getting out of Jill's sight.

"Judy, why don't you sit next to Nick? I'll be in the kitchen. Oh, after you're finished dealing with dad, go to my room, we made a surprise for you."

"Really? Thanks, I'll be there—"

"Speaking of dad, he's here," Jill whispered into Judy's ears and ran back to the kitchen.

"Mr. Wilde," said Stu with a nervous chuckle on his face.

They both stood there, staring at each other like strangers.

"Sit, sit… Oh, try out some of our homemade blueberry pies," said Bonnie who came from the kitchen and quickly sat down beside his husband, both facing Nick and Judy.

"Thanks, Stu, and Bonnie. I really appreciate the hospitality here," said Nick as he sat down and sliced one small proportion of his pie. "This is really good," said Nick while chewing the tasty pie.

But after the fox finished his slice of pie, the staring competition began again.

"So… Judy, how did you meet Nick?" said Bonnie, trying not to embarrass his husband.

"Nick… and I met at the ZPD when solving a case."

"So, he's already a police officer? But I thought you said he just graduated from police academy," said Bonnie.

"NOooo, I mean, he was a suspect for the 14 missing mammal case."

"What, he was a criminal?" said Stu.

"NOooo, he was a—"

"A small-time businessman," replied Nick.

"A legitimate businessman?" questioned Stu.

"Guys, before we met, he sold popsicles. End of story"

Stu stopped for a moment, thinking about what he was going to ask. He then turned his attention to his daughter, and asked a straightforward question, "Judy, do you love him?"

"Yes?"

"Mr. Wilde, do you love my daughter?"

"Yes!"

"Then tell us why did you choose our daughter; more importantly, tell us why did you quit doing business?"

"Well, to be honest with you, sir, it's your daughter who changed my mind. She's full of optimism… and, and the look on her energetic face always gives me a purpose in life," Nick paused for a moment, and looked at Judy. "Life is hard being a fox: Too often, I'm mistreated; I'm not trusted because I'm a fox, and no matter how I tried to fit into society, the world only sees foxes as untrustworthy and shifty animals, and it led me to believe that I could only be what I am, a fox that couldn't be trusted; a fox that hustled other animals for a living… but when I met your daughter and she asked me to help her solve a case, I have never felt so trusted in all my life. I quit selling popsicles because your daughter told me that I'm so much more…" Nick paused again as Judy's eyes started to weep a few teardrops, "I'm more than just a popsicle hustler; that I can be anything I want, even being an officer of the law—"

"Oh, sweetheart, here, have a tissue," said Bonnie.

"Thanks mum," she gulped and stopped crying, "Nick is not a self-indulgent jerk, and most certainly not what you all think he is. I have been dating him for almost a year and... and… I can tell you that he has a caring heart for those who actually care about him. I trust him and I love him."

"Oh Judy," Stu hesitated for a brief moment, "Nick is your boyfriend, no matter what we say or think."

"Sweetheart, your father's right. You're a big bunny now, and if we start deciding what our kids should do, they'll start relying on us for making tough decision for them."

"What, really?" said Judy.

"Of course, I mean, you're the one who didn't let us decide what you want to be, that's what got you into the police force in the first place. And look at you now, a police lieutenant. I'm proud of you."

"Dad, I know I'm not always a good listener and I know you did that just because you love and care about me... I just want to say: you're an excellent father no matter what."

"Oh Judy... did you hear that Bon?" laughed Stu, "I'm an excellent father—"

"I have an excellent mother as well," Judy interrupted.

"Did you hear that Stu?"

"Ha, good one Judy," Stu laughed, and then he hesitated, like something wasn't right, "wait a minute, if Judy's a lieutenant, would that make her your boss, Nick?"

The two looked at each other uneasily after Stu asked.

"Officer Wilde, reporting for duty, ma'am!" the fox saluted, pretending like it was a gag, like nothing was wrong; he was embarrassed. He knew her father was mocking him, but it was for her daughter's own good, and she knew that as well...

"Very funny, Nick," said Judy. She looked back at her father, and said, "dad, he maybe under me, but I still need his financial support if we are going to live in the big city."

"Well, I hope you're not still living in that small apartment, dear. I know rabbits don't need to take a shower that often but you should really rent a place that has one; it's good for your hygiene, and health."

"Gee dad—"

"I actually rented my apartment out," the fox interrupted, "we're saving money for a new apartment, so at the meantime, I'll be staying at Judy's small apartment, but I have to say though, the rent for that place is kinda expensive compared to the other ones, right Judy?"

Indeed, the rent for the bunny's small apartment was outrageously expensive, for it was located too close to the central station of Zootopia.

"Yup, at least we're saving money, I mean, with Nick's salary and his rental income, plus my salary, we might be able to purchase our own apartment in the near future."

"Great! One less thing to worry about," said Stu as he suddenly checked his watch. He quickly looked back up, face towards the fox, and said, "Nick, you are always welcome into our family. Just take good care of Judy when she's in the big city, okay?"

"You have my word, sir. "

"Good! Time to watch TV!" He took a huge universal remote control out of his jumpsuit center pouch and turned on the TV.

"Moose interviewer: …Welcome back to ZNN as we continue on the interview with our mayor candidate, Donald Trumpster. So, as you were saying?

Donald Trumpster: I'm going to build a wall, bigger, better and stronger than ever before. And I'm going to have the notorious mod boss, Mr. Big, pay for it!

Moose interviewer: I can see the crowds downstage are cheering for you—

Donald Trumpster: Yes, they are, because a taller wall around Little Rodentia means no more big animals coming into our town illegally, and stomping us.

Moose interviewer: Yes but today, Mr. Big said, and I'm just quoting him, he said, 'I'm not going to pay for that f-king wall!' So if you don't get an actual cheque from Mr. Big for whatever it will cost, how are you going to make him pay for the wall?

Donald Trumpster: I will, and the wall just got 5 feet taller, believe me! We have no border. We have no control. Animals coming in and out as they please. We need to build a wall and it has to be built quickly.'..."

The fox's mouth opened a little, curiously staring at the golden haired lemming on the TV. The cameraman had to use a telephoto lens to focus on the lemming, like a magnifying glass, which made the surrounding microphones looked gigantic. The fox was astonished that a lemming can be that small yet so powerful.

"That's Donald Trumpster, Mr. Wilde. Will you vote for him?" said Stu.

"I… don't know. I'm not into politics, sorry," lied the fox. He knew politics; knew well enough that if he had said yes, there would be tough questions for him, asking him why, and if he had said no, there could be disagreements with the prey supporters, like Stu, so to avoid arguments over a simple 'yes or no' question, he lied and stayed neutral, but deep down inside the fox's mind, no doubt he didn't want the lemming to win, for nothing benefits him when voting him.

"Well, let me tell you: he's got the majority of rodents supporting him, but with mayor Lionheart back in the game, things are going to get ugly, I mean, the 'Nighthowler' aftermath made mayor Lionheart look like the hero, protector of the city, locking predators away in an asylum, that's what prey voters want, an executor, not some 'talk but no promises' kind of mayor. He actually did something—"

"Judy have you met Nick's family yet?" asked Bonnie, barging into the conversation.

"Not yet, but eventually we will."

"Ah yes, mind if you could tell us what your dad do, Mr. Wilde?" questioned Stu.

"He's a tailor. He owns a tailor shop in Happytown," the dishonest fox deceived the rabbit again. It was not like the fox wanted to lied to the bunny's parents, it was because he wasn't entirely sure what his father did for a living: owning a tailor shop; built and owned a theme park that was later sold to the highest bidder; buying properties; receiving rental income; owning and selling his properties… Even if the fox told her parents the truth, it would make him look arrogant; unworthy of comparison with her parents as they were mere farmers. Perhaps, he thought to himself, later in future, Judy could explain it to them, that their daughter had a boyfriend whose father was, more or less, a successful fox.

"Oooo, a tailor, I should get my tuxedo fixed in case you two get married."

"Dad!" yelled the bunny. Even though a rabbit's face cannot blush, they all knew she was immensely embarrassed.

"Stu," replied Bonnie as she stared at his husband, signaling him to watch what he was saying, "and your mother?"

"She's a housewife."

"Do they know you're dating with a rabbit?" questioned Bonnie.

The fox wasn't prepared to answer this question; this time, he gave up lying and said, "No, we haven't told them yet."

"We should hold a… Nick and Judy's family reunion. You know, a party where we can meet them in person and get to know each other. Does that sound good to you Stu?"

"What?" Stu was busy watching TV, "Yeah, sure!"

They appeared oblivious of the fox's lies, but no to her. She partially knew Nick's family; knew that they were... 'complicated,' and if her parents kept on asking the fox, the more she had to explain to them. So, disgracefully, she quickly finished her pie and excused herself, "Mum, dad, I have to go now."

"Where are you going, sweetie?

"Jill and the rest made a surprise for me."

"Sure... oh, are you two both staying for the night?"

"I guess not cause we have work tomorrow. Right, Nick?"

The fox nodded, finishing his pie as well. "Leave the plates to me, Carrots. I'll take them to the kitchen."

"Carrots?" questioned Stu.

"Oh, Nick likes to call me that."

"Well, that's racist."

They paused and looked at each other like strangers again.

"Just kidding!"

"I think you might have stepped a bit too far there, Stu."

"It's okay, Mr. and Ms. Hopps. I'll leave you two alone to enjoy your pies," said Nick awkwardly as he quickly walked to the kitchen, and heard Hopps' parents arguing quietly in the background.

After a few steps of walking, the fox was in the kitchen. He saw Jill and William at the corner the kitchen beside a storage room. They appeared to be chatting, or more like gossiping in the background. The fox paid no attention to the two tall rabbits and placed the plates in the sink.

"How's the pie, Nick?" said the bunny that was as tall as the fox.

"It's delicious—" before the fox could finish his compliment, the tall male bunny grabbed his green Hawaiian shirt and flung him inside the dimly lighted storage room with the female bunny closing the door behind them…