Yo readers!
This chapter is NOT explicit, if anything it's just deceptively sweet, but definitely toward the more mature end of the T-rating.
Hope you enjoy!
RIGHT EFFORT
"So, you heard from Donnie at all?"
"Nah. Don't really know what happened to the ol' egghead. Could be all alone in the lair for all I know."
"Hmmph. Wouldn't surprise me. Figured you two would have stuck around a lot longer, though. I know you how you get when you're left alone."
"Well, the Force dudes made me an offer, and the Donster didn't really object."
"I hear you. Alright, your back is good. You mind doing me now?"
"Woah, not on the first date, bro!" I laughed at my own joke, even after Raph whipped the soapy washcloth into the back of my head.
"Very funny, genius. Though this is hardly our first date." He mumbled flatly.
It might sound freaky for a teenage dude, but when we've lived together, my brothers and I have showered together for as long as I can remember. Sure, most human kids probably stop doing that around the same time they start preschool, but most humans don't have a huge shell on their back that their arms can't reach. I mean, we don't really wear any clothes, anyways. No matter how pissed off we'd get at each other, nothing brings a family together like scrubbing the sewer stink out of each other's shells.
"So, what about Leo?" he asked.
"Uh…what about Leo?"
"I don't know. You heard from him at all?"
"Nope. Haven't heard a thing since the day after…you know."
"Hmmph."
I started scrubbing at the top of his shoulders, noticing how black and purple his skin was with bruises where his shell didn't cover. However Raph had got pinned under all that rubble, it sure didn't seem like a pleasant experience. I was pretty beat up myself; my knees still killed me where I had fallen through the floor. Nothing a little time and an icepack couldn't fix, though.
"So, what've you been up to since you left?"
"Nightwatcher stuff, mostly. Found a nice place in the sewer underneath Williamsburg. Nothing like this crystal tower you got here, though."
"Yeah, it's a pretty sweet gig. Just the perks of being a superhero, I guess. Still not as cool as riding on a motorcycle and whipping those sweet manriki all around, though."
"Heh, it's been bearable. Not much to do now that Casey don't come around, though. You heard April's pregnant?"
"What? No way! That's awesome!"
"Yeah, for them." He grumbled.
"And kinda gross, too."
"Gross? What's that supposed to mean?"
"I dunno, Raph. Two humans doing it, all that pale flesh…and noises…and juices…"
"Ugh, alright. You made your point." He grimaced. "It's just what humans do, Mike. How else you think they've been around so long?"
"Uh…Guns, I guess? Not really sure. Never really concerned myself with how humans do it. Not like it's gonna happen to us any time soon. Besides, the ol' rat dude taught us everything we need to know about the world, and it's not like that was ever in the lesson plan."
"True. I don't even wanna think about how Splinter would cover all that." I cleared my throat and started my impression of Sensei that I used to use behind his back all the time.
"My sons, neither time nor space can stop the hungry serpent from entering the lotus garden, and the fruit cannot…"
"You're gonna make me nauseous, Mikey. Cut it out." Despite his protests, I could feel Raph chuckling underneath his shell. "Gotta remember not to let you anywhere near my internet history."
"Eww, Raph! What, is it all Animal Planet documentary stuff on turtles screwing?" I started my nature flick narrator voice. "Here, we have the Eastern Box Turtle, in the full heat of mating season."
"Now you're the one who's getting gross, bro. It ain't nothing like that." Classic Raph, never totally answering a question, just saying enough to leave me curious. By now, I was at the bottom of his shell, noticing how his tail flicked in the opposite direction any time the washcloth got close enough to it.
"Then what is it like, huh?"
"Forgot how fucking persistent you can be, Mike." I heard him let out a sigh as I closed my fingers around his tail through the cloth, gently pulling it back toward me. "All kinds of stuff, I guess. Humans, of course, usually a guy and a girl…doing…you know."
"Usually?"
"Uh, sometimes two girls." A blush of red spread across his cheeks, clearly not just from the hot water flowing out of the tap. "Sometimes…two guys."
"Woah, what?" I exclaimed. Raph stepped away from me, turning to face me but eyes locked on the water swirling around the drain.
"Woah, what, yourself! What is this, the Spanish Inquisition? Don't you know not to ask people about what they do in their personal time?" The volume of his voice kept rising, sounding exactly like the lead-up to a fight with Leo. "You judging me or something?"
"No way, bro. Just curious, is all. Plus…I didn't really know two dudes could…you know…do it. Or two girls, for that matter."
"You called me a 'tail-raiser' in front of Nano like ten minutes ago. Don't you even know what that means?" He practically spat at me.
"Oh." My eyes went wide. "Uh…not really, dude. Just kinda heard it on TV one time, and the studio audience all laughed super loud." Despite Raph's awkwardness, he looked up at me with his typical crooked grin.
"It ain't rocket science, bro. Doesn't take a genius to put one and one together."
Something about Raph's last sentence made some gears turn in my head. I hadn't gone over the details of the night Splinter passed away in my mind very recently, but Raph's snide little explanation sparked a memory back to life.
"You just gave me an idea, Raphie. Listen…"
"Mike." He cut me off. "I don't know what you're asking, but if you think…"
"No, no way man, just hear me out. What do you remember about the last night Splinter was still around?"
"Uh…" he quizzically raised a brow at me. "It wasn't anything special. Splinter went to bed after his soaps were done, you and me were playing Call of Duty. Some dickhead kept camping and quick-scoping me, so I quit and went to my room."
"Yeah, you kept getting quick-scoped because the joystick was sticking."
"So? What's your point?"
"After you knocked out, I went to Don's lab to have him fix it. But all the lights were off. What's weird about that?" Raph paused as he processed it.
"It was only ten o'clock. Normally Donnie's up 'til at least two."
"Right. Now listen, I went to find Leo to ask if he could fix it, but he was just going up the stairs after I left the lab."
"Yeah, so? He always goes to bed pretty early. Leaves you and me to just bro out."
"He didn't go into his room, Raph. I saw him walk into Don's room." Raph's eyes practically shot out of his head. "I know, right?"
"Shit, Mikey. Shit." He wrung his head in his hands, exhaling sharply. "Fuck. You really think…?"
"I dunno, man."
"You didn't tell anyone before now?"
"I didn't know what to think they were doing! Dee might as well have been explaining quantum mechanics to Leo."
"I don't believe it…No way, Leo's way too high and mighty to do anything like that."
"I bet he thinks so too. Why do you think he left in such a huff, full drama queen?" From Raphael's blank stare, I could tell the same puzzle pieces were falling together in his head.
"All beat up over doing something 'dishonorable'. That screams Leo."
"That's what I'm saying, bro."
"But Mike…You probably wouldn't know this, but two brothers doing it…that is actually pretty messed up. You never heard of incest?"
"Uh, bro. You're talking to the horror movie marathon master. Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Hills Have Eyes, the Kardashians…but, Leo and Don are two dudes. No chance they'd have a freaky inbreed baby."
"I get that, but it's still pretty taboo."
"As far as I know, there's only four dudes like us on the planet. And the one thing Master Splinter did say whenever the raunchy scenes in the James Bond flicks came on was that…well, only people in love are supposed to 'do it'. And even though we don't always act like it, you know all four of us love each other, so…"
"So what, now you're trying to justify it?"
"Just making sense of it, dude. Like, why Leo and Don would hook up in the first place. I mean, who else are we supposed to do it with? You know any humans into long walks in the sewer and scrubbing the gunk out of your shell?"
"Maybe April at one point, but I guess given the news from Casey…"
"Come on, Raph, you're telling me you've never considered 'getting closer' with one of your bros before?" Making his current blush disappear by comparison, his face turned as red as the bandana hanging on the towel rack next to mine. "I just learned it was possible, like, thirty seconds ago, and…"
"I ain't having this conversation with you anymore. Not right now." He grunted, starting a stomp to the door before I stepped in front to block him.
"Then when?"
Thanks for reading!
The "right effort" here is how "fucking persistent" Mikey can be, getting Raph to open up and theorizing what he does about Leo and Don.
The last quarter of this chapter is, through Mike, my personal rebuttal to anyone who thinks Tcest is gross. Though by now, they've probably stopped reading lol.
Tell your friends! And keep those reviews coming!
