A/N: POVs do change throughout the story.


Joker's fingers flew across the consoles, while they had managed to break away from Rannoch, they still had to get to the relay while several Normandy class ships were on their tail. Somehow he found this task much more manageable than trying to sit patiently while the love of his life and sister were both in a war zone, at least now he felt useful, and soon he would have both Elissa and Hilary back in his arms. 'And I'm never letting them go again,' he thought with a wistful smile as he set the course Elissa had determined in case there was an emergency and they had to leave Rannoch. They were now en route to New Canton, Hackett, and hopefully some answers, there was too much going on to keep it all straight.

EDI's blue orb suddenly appeared in its station."Jeff!" she said loudly, getting his attention immediately.

He groaned, he did not have time for this, he had to get this ship on the right path and then go find his family. "Not now, EDI. Kind of busy flying a ship here."

"Give me control of the ship!" she practically yelled. The fear in her voice startled him, he had never heard her like this before, she sounded like she was actually afraid and not just being empathetic to a situation.

"EDI, I'm not about to give you the helm when there's not reason to," he said dismissively, turning his attention back to the consoles but she turned them off. "What the shit, EDI?! I kind of need to fly here!"

"You need to get to the shuttle bay!" she said with command in her voice he had not heard before now.

"Why?" he asked, very concerned the AI had finally lost her mind.

"Elissa is dying," said EDI and her voice sounded as if it had wavered.

Joker felt his heart sink to the floor and beyond, in an instant he was on his feet and moving though his feet felt like two blocks of lead. The feeling had nothing to do with the cast on his leg. "What's the situation?" he asked as he made his way down the bridge to the elevator.

"She was shot with a polonium round in the thigh," said EDI and Joker quickened his pace. "Chakwas is tending her now but her bio signs are fading, her heartbeat is irregular and slowing down, her breathing is shallow and she is not moving."

Joker's fingers trembled as he pushed the elevator controls, he fought for each breath as his heart pounded so hard in his chest he was sure it would break a rib or two. The elevator seemed to take twice as long to arrive and when he was finally able to get in, the journey to the shuttle bay was almost like moving in slow motion.

"Note to self, tell someone to make it so the fucking elevators go faster!" he said through gritted teeth. If he could have paced he would have but the elevator was too narrow and his legs were already beginning to ache. He would need to save what energy he had to get to her side as quickly as possible. Finally the doors opened and he was practically tripping over himself as he charged out, quickly he scanned the room and saw the large crowd that had gathered close to where the ramp descended from. 'She's there,' he thought and he moved as fast as his legs could carry him, cast and all, to where the group had gathered. He could make out some of the people standing around, most were Normandy crew but he saw Hilary and Kolyat together as well as Tali and Brynn. No one was speaking and all looked anxious.

"Jeff!" cried Hilary when she saw her brother and she rushed to him, throwing her arms carefully around him in a loving embrace.

He returned the favor, holding her against him in a tight embrace, while he was anxious to see Elissa he was just as equally relieved to see that his little sister was alive and well save for the few bruises she had gotten during her flight. Glancing over his shoulder he saw Kolyat watching them with tears in his eyes and Joker threw out his arm as a way of beckoning to him to join in their embrace. He seemed to get the message and immediately rushed to where Joker and Hilary were standing. When he was sure Kolyat was included in their tight embrace, he wrapped his arm around him, thinking of him now as a brother as well as Elissa's surrogate son and that was enough to make him family. And right now, their small family needed each other.

"How is she?" asked Joker after a few moments of silence. He pushed himself away from them so he could better see their expressions and faces.

Neither one said a word to him, merely exchanging a worried glance.

Joker could see it in their eyes and he pushed them out of the way, continuing through the crowd of people, no longer caring about the rest of the people in the world just about the woman who was his world. He was met with little resistance from the others, most of them moved willingly out of his way, now he could see Elissa's hair and forehead. His heart continued to pound and it was getting harder for him to breathe the closer he got, when he finally got through, he felt as if all of the air had been sucked out of his lungs. She was laying prone, her eyes closed, and her skin was a sickly ash color. Gazing down further he saw Chakwas was hard at work on the gaping wound in her thigh, he swallowed hard, there was a large puddle of blood already underneath her leg and it was growing with each passing second.

"I need a clamp," said Chakwas sharply and Quaes immediately handed her one. The doctor was splattered with Elissa's blood and practically sitting in it but that did not seem to phase her, instead she pressed on, doing whatever she could to repair the damage the bullet had done. She quickly bandaged up the large wound, at least for the moment. "Alright, that fixed her femoral, she shouldn't lose as much blood now. Do you have that injection ready?"

"Ready, should counteract immediate effects of polonium," replied Quaes as he handed Chakwas the large needle.

Chakwas took the needle and lined it up above her heart, in one quick stroke she plunged it through Elissa's chest, releasing the contents into her bloodstream. When she pulled the needle out, she immediately put bandage on it to prevent any further bleeding. "I need someone to get the stretcher from the medbay, we can't transport her any other way or we might disturb her temporary repairs."

"I'll get it," said Tali in a shaky voice.

Garrus put his arm around her. "I'll go with her, it isn't exactly light."

Under normal circumstances Tali would have argued that she was not as weak and vulnerable as she appeared but given the situation, she merely nodded her head and together they went to the elevator.

Joker was still staring at Elissa, unable to process that this was actually happening, without thinking he sat on the floor stretching out his wrapped up leg to the side. Gently he pulled Elissa onto his lap as best he could and wrapped his arms around her, if this was truly the end, he wanted to know he had been there for her and not just stood by as an observer. In the back of his mind he expected to be reprimanded by Chakwas but the doctor remained silent on the subject, and for that he was grateful. Carefully he held her, resting her head against his shoulder, he could hear her shallow breaths and noticed that they were becoming fewer and far between. He knew her time was almost up.

"I love you, Elissa," he whispered, and he kissed her forehead. Joker could feel the tears running down his cheeks but he did not care, the woman he loved was dying in his arms, this was the most appropriate time to cry. Suddenly he felt her stirring in his arms, looking down he saw her eyes open, they crossed for a moment and then focused on him again.

"Jeff," she said in a weak voice. "I knew . . . I knew you'd come."

Joker sniffed, trying to stop the tears. "Always, Ellie. Rampaging Elcor couldn't keep me away from you."

A small smile flitted across her lips for a brief moment before falling away. "I'm sorry . . . for everything . . . J-Jeff. I should've . . . should've . . ."

"Hush, sweetheart," said Joker in a soothing voice, "we'll have time to talk about that later."

Elissa weakly shook her head. "No, Jeff, I-I don't . . . think I'll make it."

Joker shook his head, refusing to believe what she was saying. "You're Commander Shepard, this is just a minor bump on the road for you." He was trying to sound cheerful but even now he could feel her becoming heavier and heavier in his arms. 'Where are Tali and Garrus with that stretcher?' he thought as he held onto Elissa even tighter than before.

"I feel . . . cold," he heard her say and panic surged through him.

"Hold on, Ellie, just a couple of more minutes and you'll be okay," he said as a new wave of tears rolled down his cheeks. "Please, baby, don't let go."

"I-I love you, Jeff," she whispered and he felt her body go limp in his arms just as Tali and Garrus arrived with the stretcher.

The sound that was ripped from Joker's throat would echo through the minds of the crew for the rest of their lives: it was the sound of a man's heart breaking.


Elissa woke up and the first thing she noticed immediately was the blue sky above her, it was unlike any sky she had seen before, streaked with white clouds but upon closer inspection she noticed that there were stars shining too. Slowly she became aware of her body, feeling all of her limbs as if it were the first time, each sensation was new but familiar all at once. Then she felt something hard on her back, she looked away from the sky and saw that she was surrounded by a wooden wall. She reached out and touched the wood, seeing that she could touch the top and that it was somewhat rounded she realized she was in a boat, like the ones she had seen in her history books. 'Where's the Normandy?' she thought as she sat up.

She looked around her and saw that she was surrounded by water, it was calm with barely a breath of wind stirring the serene surface, only the movements of the boat disturbed the water. 'Guess I should try to figure out where I am exactly,' she reasoned. Elissa looked all around her and saw nothing but an expanse of water for as far as she could see, there was not even a speck of land on the horizon, which worried her. The last time she had ended up someplace unexpected, it had been an asteroid with a base full of indoctrinated scientists.

'If this is a mission, why doesn't it feel like I'm wearing my armor?' she wondered and when she looked down she saw that she was wearing a plain white dress that went down to her knees. She touched the dress expecting to feel the usual sythetic material but was surprised to feel that it was made of actual fabric, this was getting even stranger, there had not been true fabric in decades. 'Okay, I'm really hoping this is a dream,' she thought as she continued to observe her surroundings.

She gazed again at the horizon and saw there was a dark mass now present where the sky met the sea, she could tell without really thinking about it that the boat was heading in that direction. There was something strange about this place, it felt like a dream but at the same time, it felt real. She had a feeling that if she were able to get to the shore she saw she would be able to find out some answers. 'There has to be some way to get this boat to move faster,' she pondered and before the thought was complete, she felt the boat give a gentle lurch and it went faster but even though she felt the difference, it was still hardly disrupting the water's surface. She watched as the shore became more and more defined, it looked similar to some of the tropical planets she had visited but undisturbed, like no one had ever been here before. Ordinarily she would be suspicious of traveling to a new land but she felt safe with this one, like she had been here before but did not remember.

The boat gently bumped against the shore and she carefully got out of the boat, her legs moving with strength she had not felt since before the Reaper war, but when her bare feet touched the white sand, she felt nothing. Curiously she kicked the sand but not a grain was a disturbed, she lifted her foot and saw that there was not even a footprint left. "What?" she whispered, surprised that she was able to speak.

Behind her she felt a presence, it was familiar and one she had not felt in a long time, slowly she turned around and smiled, it was exactly whom she thought it was. She started walking towards him and he to her, right now she was too relieved to see a friend that she did not even question what he was doing here in the first place or what it might mean.

He stopped a little less then a foot from her and smiled. "Siha, it's good to see you again."

Elissa smiled. "I'm so glad you're here, Thane."


'This can't be happening,' thought Joker as he watched Chakwas and Quaes hook up several tubes and machines to Elissa's still form. Somehow, someway she was still alive but just barely, if nothing was done to reverse the damage done by the polonium they would lose her for sure, so Chakwas was attempting to stabilize her bios before they even thought of preparing for surgery.

"There," said Chakwas at last, "that should do it."

Joker looked up from his lap, his eyes still red from crying. "Is she going to be okay?"

Chakwas shook her head. "While I've managed to give her another dose of the solution that counteracts the effects of polonium, there was still damage done to her internal organs, including her heart and brain. Currently she's in a medically induced coma in order to allow her cybernetics to repair the damage surgery can't, when they've done all they can, that's when we'll operate."

He took of his hat and ran his fingers through his hair. "Okay, doc, I need some explanations."

"Of course," said Chakwas kindly.

"First, how is it even possible that she's alive? I felt . . . I felt . . ." he started but he was unable to finish the words, it still seemed like a bad dream.

"Do you remember when I injected the solution into her heart?" asked Chakwas and Joker nodded. "Enough of the solution was able to be dispersed through her body that it counteracted some of the more damaging effects of the polonium. Technically she was dead for a few minutes but the solution was able to reverse the process on most of her vital systems. Now life support machines are ensuring that the working systems remain functioning."

"Then why isn't she awake?" asked Joker, taking Elissa's limp hand in his.

Chakwas shrugged. "Other than the fact I put her in a coma?" Joker nodded again and she continued. "I'm not exactly sure, while her body systems are functioning enough that she should be conscious even when not in a coma, it might be something mental that's keeping her from regaining consciousness."

"You mean there's something wrong with her brain," remarked Joker and was surprised when Chakwas shook her head.

"That's not at all what I mean," replied Chakwas.

Joker raised an eyebrow. "You're losing me, doc."

She sighed heavily, this was not going to be an easy conversation. "Jeff, I don't think she wants to come back. She might have given up the will to live."

"You can't be serious," balked Joker. He could not, would not, accept the fact that the strongest woman in the galaxy had given up on life. "Doc, this is Commander Shepard we're talking about, she's survived much worse than this. Besides, she has too much to live for."

"I'm not sure that's what this is, Jeff, but it can't be ruled out," said Chakwas, putting her hand on his shoulder. "Sometimes when a person's been through too much, they just . . . give in."

"Not her, not Elissa," said Joker defiantly. "She's a fighter, she'd never give into death, not when there's so much at stake."

Chakwas sighed again, this was going nowhere. "I'm sorry, Jeff, but unless she starts showing more brain activity . . . we might have to consider removing life support."

If looks could kill, Chakwas would be a smoking pile of ash by now. "Don't you dare," said Joker in a deadly voice, "don't even think about that, she'll pull through."

"Fine, Jeff," said Chakwas lightly. "Quaes and I will leave you in peace, we'll be back in a couple of hours to check on her vitals."

Joker gave a curt nod and turned his attention back to Elissa, not even paying attention when the doctors left. He took off his hat and carefully placed it on her head, then he took her hand in both of his, he was hoping that if he made his presence known to her in some way she would decide to wake up and come back to him.

"Come on, baby," he whispered, kissing her fingertips. "Wake up."


"Thane, this is incredible," said Elissa in awe as she looked around. "Where are we? How was this even possible?"

Thane chuckled. "I think you know where we are, Siha."

Elissa thought for a moment and suddenly everything fell into place. "I'm across the sea."

"Yes," replied Thane with a slight frown. "You have joined me."

She could hardly believe his words, instantly she started to touch her flesh to see if she was solid or not, to her she felt real but that still did not explain why she could not feel the sand. "I can't be . . . it's not possible . . . am I dead?"

"Can you feel the sand beneath your feet?" asked Thane. "Can you smell the ocean breeze or feel the wind in your hair?"

Elissa shook her head. "No, I can't feel anything." She reached out and touched his shoulder. "I can't even feel you, Thane."

"Then there is still time," said Thane, he sounded relieved. "You are not yet dead, Siha, you are between worlds."

"Between worlds?" repeated Elissa, raising an eyebrow. "Could you explain how that's even possible?"

"I will, but there is still much to discuss," said Thane seriously. "Come, Siha, I have something to show you."

He started walking towards what looked like an oasis and Elissa reluctantly followed him, her mind was still swimming with a plethora of questions that she desperately wanted answered but she knew Thane, he would indulge her when he felt it was right.

"So if I'm dead, or between worlds as you say," said Elissa after a few moments of silence, "where are the others? Anderson? Mordin?"

Thane glanced at her. "They are well, Mordin enjoys the seashells."

Elissa chuckled. "Does he run tests on them?"

"As much as he can," replied Thane with a smile. "Anderson is content as well, he and Kahlee are enjoying their time together."

"Kahlee? Kahlee Sanders?" asked Elissa, she was very skeptical.

He nodded. "The same. She joined us not too long ago, while you were on Rannoch."

"Wait, wait, Kahlee's dead?!" exclaimed Elissa. "Why wasn't I told? Hackett surely—"

"Does it matter now whether you knew or not?" asked Thane grimly. "But this is not what I wished to discuss with you. Before we start, I have a question, how is Kolyat? Is he well? Has he stayed away from the wrong people?"

Elissa nodded. "He's perfectly fine, he has found someone whom he wishes to spend the rest of his life with. How come you didn't know this? Can't you see him from where we are?"

Thane shook his head. "I am unable to until I fulfill my penance."

"Your penance? For what?" asked Elissa.

"The lives I took," he said softly.

"I thought you asked for forgiveness for what you did as an assassin," she said curiously. "Why would you have to pay penance?"

"I'm not paying for the lives I took on behalf of others, I am paying for the ones I took of my own satisfaction," he sighed heavily. "I need to pay penance for taking the lives of those who took Irikah's."

"That hardly seems fair," said Elissa bitterly. "So does that mean I'm going to have to pay for taking Kai Leng's life? I did kill him in your name."

Thane shook his head. "No, Siha, you will not. I needlessly took the lives of those slavers out of revenge, you took his life for the greater good of the galaxy."

"What about the hundreds of thousands of Batarians I killed with an asteroid?" asked Elissa, crossing her arms.

"That was not your fault as you well know, though you still blame yourself," he said calmly. "This can be resolved after you have made your choice."

Elissa raised an eyebrow. "Choice? What are you talking about?"

Thane went silent again as they entered the oasis. The area was full of lush green grass and tall palm trees, in the center was a water feature surrounded by large white stones and a waterfall cascading down, there was something incredibly peaceful about this place.

"Please sit, Siha," said Thane as he sat down on one of the stones that surrounded the water and she sat beside him.

"This place is beautiful," she whispered, still taking in the serenity and beauty. "Where are we now?"

"The Waters of Time," replied Thane. "The water behind us show the past, present, and future of an individual."

Elissa was surprised to say the least. "Really? Can you show me?"

He nodded and lowered his hand until it barely touched the water, the moment his skin made contact with the water it rippled and an image appeared, it was Thane alive and well holding a new born Kolyat. Elissa smiled at the scene, when he was alive he had never spoken about the day Kolyat was born and seeing it this way was remarkable to say the least.

"Why'd you bring me here?" she asked breathlessly, still mesmerized by the magic water.

"It is the perfect place for our talk," he said in his usual calm manner.

She looked up from the water and at Thane, still wondering what was going on. "What's this talk we're supposed to be having?"

Thane smiled. "It is regarding your choice. Since you are between worlds, you can choose whether or not you return to the world of the living or pass on to be with those you've lost."

Her eyes widened. "I have a choice?"

"For now," said Thane softly.


James sighed heavily, the mission had gone horribly wrong to say the least, and now they were all sitting around in limbo waiting for any signs of life from Shepard. They were all still reeling from Adams' death, especially those whom had worked with him in engineering, but they could not put him to rest without Shepard. Come to think of it, the crew could not do anything until she was alright; they had no mission, no destination, and until further notice no pilot. Not that he could blame Joker, if Miranda were the one laying half dead, he would not move from her side until he knew that she was going to pull through.

All around him were worried crew members, waiting for any news that would take them away from this hell, even if they were told to carry on without her. Though he knew no one would follow those orders, everyone was too loyal to willingly obey any other but Shepard, they had proven that much when they kept Kaidan out of the Normandy.

"Dios," he whispered, "how much longer do you think it'll be before we know anything?"

Beside him Miranda weakly shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not sure, she didn't look that great when I saw her earlier."

"I've never seen that much blood come out of one person," said Ken in a shaky voice. "And Adams, I can't believe he's really gone."

Tali sniffed, she had been crying ever since she brought the stretcher down to the shuttle bay and only recently managed to stop. "I know what you mean, he was such a good friend, he didn't deserve to die that way."

"He died a hero," said James fiercely. "He protected that woman who's laying in that hospital bed, and how did I repay his sacrifice? I let her get shot!" He slammed his good fist into the table.

"It wasn't your fault, James," said Miranda sternly, putting a hand on his shoulder but he shook her off.

James stood up from the table. "Of course it was! If I had stayed and helped her, she wouldn't have gotten shot! That should be me in there instead of her."

"And if that were true, Shepard would be sitting here saying the same thing about you," said Garrus calmly. "Either scenario wouldn't be of any benefit to us."

"Yes it would!" shouted James. "If it were me, we'd at least have Shepard! Right now we have nothing!"

"That is where you are wrong, James," said EDI from above. "Due to the emergency situation we are currently in, I am obligated to enact Elissa's orders if such an event were to happen."

"What are they, EDI?" asked Garrus.

"In the event that the Commander of the Normandy is incapacitated, Lieutenant James Vega is to take over as acting Captain," said EDI. "As for a destination, Elissa left orders that we were to head to New Canton to rendezvous with Admiral Hackett, which I am ready to enact once James gives the orders."

The crew turned to James who was standing there in stunned silence, the last thing he had expected was to be named as Shepard's successor, of all people he had thought it would be Garrus who would succeed her in a situation like this. When the shock wore off, he was able to find his voice.

"Lola's been shot before and we didn't have to put these emergency plans in action," said James. "Why's now different?"

"Because it is likely she will die from these wounds," said EDI and she almost sounded devastated.

"She's already died once and that didn't fucking stop her," remarked Jack, and though nobody would ever dare call her out on it, she was indeed crying evident from the mascara running down her cheeks.

James had to agree with her, Shepard had pulled through far worse than being shot with a polonium round. "I say we wait a couple of days before we make any decisions," he said sternly. "I don't think Lola's going to die so there's no need for anyone to take over her position."

"You're wrong, James," said Hannah, emerging from Liara's room. Her hair was mussed and her eyes were red and puffy but they were shining with a fierceness they had only seen in Elissa's. "The Normandy and her crew still have a mission to complete, with or without my daughter. You need to step up and assume your new role, you know she would have wanted you to."

"I can't," he argued. "The Normandy's Lola's ship, not mine. I can't just take her place even if she is critically injured, I still say we wait."

Garrus stepped forward. "James, I know your heart's in the right place, but you have to think about it. What if she doesn't recover? We'll be days behind schedule and it'll cost us lives, resources, and time, three things we can't afford to waste."

James sighed, he knew Garrus was speaking sense but he was too upset to think logically. "Would you do this, Garrus, if you were in my position?"

The Turian nodded. "While I wouldn't exactly be happy about it, I would take over, knowing my crew and the rest of the galaxy needed me. You need to do it, James."

Inwardly, James sighed, he knew Garrus was right and there was only one thing he could do. "If I do take over, temporarily until Lola's better, will you follow me?" he asked, turning to the crew.

"Of course we'll follow you, James," said Jacob sternly. "What makes you think we wouldn't?"

James smirked. "Okay, so you pendejos will listen and obey my every command? I kind of like the sound of that."

"Sounds like you're back to normal, Vega," chuckled Garrus. "What are your first orders, Captain?"

"EDI," said James, looking up at the ceiling, "set course for New Canton, I'll also need to send Hackett a report of what happened on Rannoch. I'm going to need every detail you have, EDI, forward it to my omni-tool."

"Yes, Captain," said EDI. "You might also want to speak with Joker, inform him of this change in command and tell him where we are headed."

He raised an eyebrow. "Why don't you just tell him?"

"Under normal circumstances I would," replied EDI, "but after some quick observations, I have deemed that you personally speaking with Joker is the best course of action. "

"Alright, I'll go speak with Joker," said James sternly. "The rest of you I would advise to return to your cabins and rest, I think we've all earned some."

Jacob stretched and yawned. "Truer words were never spoken. If anyone needs me, I'll be down in cargo with Brynn and Nick, Shepard was nice enough to have some beds and our stuff sent down there. See you at breakfast."

"I think we'll turn in too," said Tali and Garrus nodded. "We'll be in the armory. Good night everyone."

The others started to disperse as well, all eager for this hellish day to be over at last, not that he could blame them. He was looking forward to the moment when he could curl up into bed next to the woman he loved, but first he had a mission to complete, and it would not be a pleasant one. Cautiously he approached the medbay doors and pressed the button to open them, from his position he could see that Joker's shoulders were hunched over and his head was lowered. He walked over to where Shepard was recovering, the only sound in the room as he walked was the beeping of the machines attached to his fearless leader.

"Hey Joker," he said quietly and watched the pilot jump though he did not turn around.

"For such a big guy, you'd think you would make more noise," huffed Joker, clutching his heart. "What do you want?"

"I wanted to let you know EDI's piloting us to New Canton," said James and he saw Joker tense up, apparently he did not like having the ship's AI as the primary pilot.

"On who's authority?" he asked, a sharp edge to his voice.

James cleared his throat. "On mine."

Joker spun around, his eyes narrowed. "Who the fuck gave you control of our ship?"

James squared his shoulders, he was not about to be verbally assaulted by a grief-stricken pilot, even they were friends. "Lola did, she had the plan in place before this happened. If you don't believe me, just ask EDI."

"So Ellie thinks you're the man to take her place, huh?" sneered Joker as he crossed his arms.

"I'm not taking her place, Joker, this is just a temporary—" he started but was cut off.

"Like hell it's temporary!" raged Joker, jumping to his feet. "She's been injured worse than this and you weren't made Commander of the Normandy!"

James took a deep breath before he spoke again. "Look Joker, we need to get to New Canton and figure out where we go from there, and the Normandy needs-"

"The Normandy needs Elissa!" shouted Joker, his face turning a red color. "The Normandy doesn't need you, Vega! You should relinquish whatever bullshit command you've taken, you have no right to it!"

"The crew agreed that I should take the position, including Hannah," said James calmly though blood was thundering in his ears. He wanted to lash out at Joker but knew if he did, it would only make the situation worse.

Joker did not respond immediately, instead standing his ground and glaring at James. "So because everyone else agrees to usurp Ellie, I should too?"

"She hasn't been usurped, Joker," said James through gritted teeth. "As soon as she's recovered, she'll take her position as Commander back."

"Get out, just get the fuck out of here," snarled Joker and he sat back down in his chair next to Shepard's bed.

James decided it would be for the best if he did leave, he turned to go when he thought of one more thing to say. "Whether you believe me or not, Joker, I hope to God she pulls through this."

He did not stay to see if his words had an affect on Joker nor did he stay to hear whatever smart ass remark he had to add. To his surprise he saw Liara waiting for him, her normally serene features were drawn together in a worried expression, there was definitely something on her mind. "Hey, Azul," he said as he neared her. "Something I can help you with?"

"Yes," she said, "though I'd rather tell this to Joker as well, he needs to know. It concerns how Cerberus was able to find us on Rannoch when we and the Quarian government took every precaution to conceal our presence."

James considered her words carefully. "Alright, but I think we should wait until the morning, you know, when Joker's calmed down a bit and I'm not drowsy from painkillers."

"Of course," said Liara softly. "Good night, James. I will see you first thing in the morning."

James nodded and headed towards the elevator, eager to crawl into bed and sleep.


Elissa gazed at the Waters of Time, they fascinated as much as frightened her, she thought about touching them but was concerned about what she might see. "So I can choose whether I stay here with you and my other friends or return to the Normandy and my crew?" she asked, turning back to Thane.

Thane gave a solemn nod. "Yes, this is your choice."

"Why is this even up for debate?" she wondered aloud, knowing full well he could hear what she had said.

"Your heart is full of doubts, Siha," replied Thane. "Many times you have wanted to simply give up the fight and let yourself fall, but you always had a reason for staying in the world of the living. It appears now you have lost your way back."

She raised an eyebrow. "Okay, so I'm not a Spectre or a Commander anymore but that doesn't mean I don't want to live anymore."

"You misunderstand," said Thane calmly, "you still want to live but you have lost your reason for fighting to, the titles you were given gave you purpose, or so you thought. You have spent so much time with the titles of Spectre and Alliance Commander you feel that is who you truly are. You feel that unless you have those titles, you have no reason to be in the galaxy."

Elissa sighed. "I guess you have a point there, I really haven't felt the same since I was stripped of my Spectre status or my Alliance rank. I feel . . . hollow, if that makes sense. I used to think that my sole purpose was to defend and protect the galaxy, but how can I do that when I've lost the authority that allowed me to do it?"

Thane looked at her thoughtfully, a small smile appearing on his lips. "And you think saving the galaxy is all there is to you?"

"No . . . maybe . . . I don't know," groaned Elissa, resting her head in her hands. "It's all anyone seems to know about me." She paused and thought about her past. "I mean, yeah there was Elysium but no one knows the real details, even I lie about them to keep the memories at bay. And there was the Citadel three times if you count the Reaper war but no one cares about the tough choices I had to make. They don't care that I wake up with the images of dead Asari commandos plastered on my eyes or about the horrible nightmares that plague me every night. All the people care about are the victories and the legends, not about me."

"Is this true for everyone around you?" asked Thane.

She shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not sure, sometimes I wonder if my crew has stuck around so long because they want some of the glory. I know that's a horrible way of looking at it, but I can't really help it, after what Kaidan did . . . after what he said . . . it's had me second guessing the motives of my entire crew as far back as when we first joined up."

"That is a perfectly understandable response, Siha," said Thane assuringly. "Though I believe you should attempt to put more faith in our friends, they've had ample opportunity to betray or abandon you, yet each time they have returned to you."

"I guess you're right, Thane," she agreed, "not all of them are like Kaidan." She was quiet for a few moments, her mind still swimming with questions. "Thane, why did you say I only had a choice for now?"

"The longer you stay in this world, the less strength you have to anchor yourself to your body and whether you want to or not, you will pass on," said Thane sadly.

"How will I know that my time's running out?" asked Elissa, looking all around her for any sign that she might be leaving.

"When you are able to feel the stone you're sitting on, the sand beneath your feet and the breeze in your hair," replied Thane. "When you can feel this world as if it were the living one, that is how you know you're time is up."

She nodded a few times, testing to see if she could feel anything, as of right now she could feel nothing. "Can I admit something to you, Thane?"

He nodded, silently urging her to continue.

"I'm tired," she said quietly. "I've given everything I am to a cause I believe in, not allowing myself to falter, trying to fix every problem I've ever come across, and I don't think I can do it anymore. I think the galaxy would understand if I just let go."

"That, Siha, is where you're wrong," said Thane, much to her surprise.


James stood at the galaxy map, gazing at the Milky Way as it swirled around in front of him, he thought of all the times he had caught Shepard doing the same thing and teased her for getting hypnotized by the colors and slow movements. Now he could see why it sometimes appeared like she was, it had a calming effect to just be standing there, the galaxy looking at peace for once. He was still waiting for Liara to show up, wondering what she could have learned about Cerberus and why they attacked Sol base. Suddenly he heard the elevator open and footsteps coming up behind him, turning around he saw Liara with a data pad in hand, the same grim look she had had the previous night on her face.

"Morning, Azul," he said with a small smile. "Have you had breakfast yet?"

"Not yet, I just got up," she replied, stifling a yawn. "Shall we head to the medbay?"

He nodded and they went over to the elevator. "How'd you know I would be at the map?"

"That's where Shepard always went whenever she needed to think," said Liara as they entered the elevator. "She said it had a way of calming her mind in a way that even sparring couldn't, I guess you picked that up from her."

"I guess so," he said with a chuckle. "I still don't know how she does it. I've been in charge one day and already EDI's bombarded me with shit that needs my attention. Who knew Lola was responsible for the most mundane stuff like inventory and training schedules?"

"I did," teased Liara, making James blush. "Don't worry, I won't give away the trade secrets, you can keep those between you and Shepard."

James laughed. "Much appreciated, Azul. You're a true amigo."

The elevator opened and they departed. The mess was already full of crew members eager to be fed, it was loud of course, like it always was and the food smelled incredible but they had to forgo it for this moment. There were more important matters to attend to before having breakfast with his girlfriend and the crew. They quietly entered the medbay, the lights were still low and Joker was fast asleep at the end of Shepard's bed, his snores filled the room along with the intermittent beeps from the medical equipment.

"Do you want to wake him?" asked Liara.

James shook his head. "I'd rather not, we aren't on the best terms right now."

Liara nodded and walked over to Joker, shaking him gently by the shoulder. "Jeff, Jeff, it's time to wake up."

Joker shuffled a little, and James heard him groan but if he said any words, they were lost on him. It took a couple of minutes but Joker was finally awake enough to know who was in the room, and when he saw James, he did not look happy.

"Is this your way of ordering me back to work?" asked Joker bitterly.

"No, we'd never ask you to leave Shepard's side," said Liara gently. "I wanted to tell you and James what I discovered yesterday, it explains why Cerberus was able to find us on Rannoch."

"Alright, what was it?" asked James, leaning against the nearest wall.

Liara bit her lip, she obviously seemed nervous about her information. "It's not easy for me to say, please understand that. Do you remember that task Shepard gave Miranda shortly after she arrived back on the Normandy?" James and Joker nodded, and she continued. "Well, after Miranda was unable to come up with any leads, Shepard gave the task to me, though in secret. She swore me to secrecy, I wasn't allowed to tell anyone unless something happened to her."

"I guess that's why you're telling us now," snorted Joker.

"Yes," said Liara and she took a breath. "I was able to trace the source of the message Shepard received a few of months ago . . . and the sender was . . . is . . ."

"Is?" asked Joker and James in unison.

She released a shaky breath. "The sender is Miranda."

There was silence.

"How does that explain how Cerberus found us?" asked James, still not seeing the connection.

"Well, I traced the message to her omni-tool and activating it must've triggered a signal that went straight to Cerberus," said Liara quietly. "That's why she hasn't been wearing her omni-tool, using it would've enabled Cerberus to find us, and I guess they did when I traced her message."

Joker was fuming. "She was being tracked by Cerberus?! Do you know for how long? Or who it was that was looking for her?"

Liara shook her head. "I'm afraid I can't tell that without hacking into Cerberus' main computer but I can't do that until I get back to the new base Feron has set my network up at."

"Does this mean Miranda was responsible for the attack on Rannoch?" seethed Joker.

"In an indirect way, yes," replied Liara sadly.

"Indirect way my ass," he snarled. "If it wasn't for her, Elissa wouldn't be laying here dying!" He stood up and headed for the doors of the medbay only to have James hold his arm across the door in an effort to stop him.

"Out of my way!" Joker shouted and James glared at him.

"I'm not going to let you make a scene, this needs to be handled with discretion," said James calmly but Joker was not about to listen.

He ducked under James' arm and the doors opened immediately, he rushed out of the medbay, heading straight for Miranda. "You!" he yelled pointing directly at her as she ate her pancakes.

"What, Moreau?" she asked, putting her fork down.

"You're a dirty rotten traitor!" he shouted just as James and Liara came out of the medbay.

"Moreau, stand down!" cried James.

"Jeff, you need to calm down before this escalates," pleased Liara.

Garrus approached. "What's going on here?"

Joker was so angry he could barely see straight. "She's been hiding from Cerberus for God knows how long! Liara also traced that message Shepard got to Miranda and it set something off in her omni-tool that alerted Cerberus to where we were!"

"Calm down, Joker," said Tali gently. "Maybe Miranda didn't know about the trace."

He laughed, he could not help himself. "No, she knew, that's why she hasn't been wearing her omni-tool! Check with EDI, she'll tell you the same."

All eyes were on Miranda now, whom had shrunk very low in her seat.

"You knew?" asked Garrus.

Miranda looked up at those she considered friends and answered honestly. "Yes, I knew about the trace, I've known about it since it was put on."

"But I saw you using an omni-tool," said Gabby, hoping this was not true.

"It was a spare one I found, with limited functions," she said quietly. "Eventually I stopped wearing it altogether."

Joker rounded to James. "You had better do something, Vega."

James pinched the bridge of his nose, this had not been what he had expected to do on his first official day as Commander. "I can confine her to her quarters until Shepard gets better, but that's all I'm going to do."

"That's bullshit!" yelled Joker, his voice ringing in the mess. "She should be thrown in the fucking brig! You don't have the balls to do what you know you should!"

"I'm not about to throw my girlfriend into a nonexistent brig just to make you happy! These accusations have no credibility!" shouted James.

Liara stepped forward. "I'm afraid I am able to back up these accusations, James. I had EDI helping me and the data is stored in the AI core, it can be accessed at anytime."

Joker felt vindicated. "Garrus, you and Jacob throw Miranda into the AI core, where we used to keep Legion."

"Joker you have no authority—" started James but Joker cut him off.

"All Alliance personnel are authorized to respond to a threat of treason as they see fit," snapped Joker.

"And as the highest ranking officer, I have the final decision on these matters," sneered James.

"You and I are of equal rank, no matter what Shepard decided!" shouted Joker, pointing an accusing finger at James. "The only person who can officially solve this dispute is Hannah!"

As if on cue, Hannah rounded the corner, shocked at the spectacle she was witnessing "What's going on here?!" Silence followed her words.

Joker was the first to speak. "Cerberus's been tracking Miranda, something she knew about and neglected to tell us, she's also responsible for how and why Cerberus was able to find us on Rannoch."

Hannah looked at Miranda, her blue eyes burning right through her. "Do these accusations have credibility, Miss Lawson? Is there evidence against you?"

She nodded slowly. "Yes, ma'am, these accusations are credible."

"I see," said Hannah grimly. "I'm afraid I have no choice, Miss Lawson. In the name of the Systems Alliance, you are under arrest for treason and are to be detained until the acting captain of the SSV Normandy SR-2 is back to active duty." She then looked at Garrus, Jacob, and James. "Garrus, Lieutenant Vega, please escort Miss Lawson to the AI core where she will stay until further notice."

"How can we keep her there?" asked Garrus. "She can just get out."

"Leave that to me," said Joker sternly and the others nodded.

"Gentlemen, please take Miss Lawson to the core, now," said Hannah in a commanding voice.

Garrus and James nodded though neither of them looked happy to do it, they motioned for Miranda to walk ahead of them which she did willingly, her head hung low. Hannah and Joker followed the silent procession into the medbay, each of them looking over at Elissa as they passed her. They entered the AI core, the four soldiers stood at one end as Miranda walked to the area where Legion used to inhabit, when she sat down on the small bench Joker went over and activated a force field.

"What makes you think that'll hold her?" Garrus whispered.

"Do you remember when Shepard went to Omega with Aria?" asked Joker and Garrus nodded. "She came across these force fields that Cerberus had developed and she had EDI salvage the tech then integrate it into the ship. Trust me, if a powerful Asari biotic like Aria can barely make a dent in one of these, Miranda has no chance."

Miranda looked up at the four soldiers, she looked like a beaten animal but she did not get sympathy from any of them, not even James. Joker stepped forward, glowering at Miranda as if she were a piece of dog shit on his shoe.

"I want you to know, Miranda," he said in a deadly voice, "if she dies, it's all your fault."

With those words, he left the core and the others followed behind him, James was the last to leave and he gave Miranda a fleeting glance before closing the door.


Elissa absentmindedly brushed her hand across the stone beside her, instantly she felt the roughness of the rock on her skin. "Thane, I can feel the rocks."

Thane's eyes widened. "We are running out of time, Siha. You must make your choice."

"I-I-I don't know," she stammered. "While the real world has my friends, there's nothing left for me there, I've lost everything, Thane! I don't have my command, my Spectre status, and my friends are in danger because of me! I have no future if I go back! You said the galaxy would care if I died, but I think you're wrong, sure they'd mourn me but in a few years I would only be a story told to children at bedtime."

"Have you made your choice?" asked Thane calmly and she paused, not answering him right away. "Before you tell me or wholly decide with your heart, I want you to touch the water, since you can now."

Elissa was skeptical to say the least but Thane had never led her astray before, so she carefully put her hand on the surface of the water then pulled it away and watched as the ripples revealed an image. It was Joker, he was smiling and looked as handsome as always, she smiled as she watched thinking that this was a moment from her past when she saw him lift his hands and she saw a gold band glinting on his left ring finger. Curious, she watched with more interest and was surprised when two small children leapt into his waiting arms, they were all laughing and seemed very happy.

"Thane, is that . . . ?" she started but could not continue for fear of being wrong.

"Yes, that is your future if you return," he said kindly. "You will be a wife and mother, that much is certain, whether you are more I do not know. Would you be content to have those titles in place of your others? Could you go on with your life knowing that you might never be a Spectre again or a Commander in the Alliance Navy?"

"Is this set in stone or subject to change?" she asked, knowing better than to put stock in everything she saw.

"That all depends on the choices made," replied Thane. "But, this is the most likely outcome based on the decisions made so far in your life. Now, the time has come to decide, Siha. Will you choose to return to the world of the living, knowing your life will be different and might not turn out how you want or will you stay here with me and the others?"

Elissa thought for a moment, the prospect of staying here in this paradise was wonderful, she would be free of all her troubles and stresses. There would be no dodging bullets or angry organizations hunting her down, she would be free for the rest of eternity, able to be with those she's missed for so long. The idea filled her with peace, a feeling she had not experienced in a very long time. She looked up at Thane, her green eyes sparkling with joy.

"Thane," she said confidently, "I've made my decision."