September 2016
"Yeah, we're home."
Rick had been struggling to tear his gaze from the spot he had occupied when Caleb Brown had blindsided them just a few months earlier, but hearing his wife's voice, he lifted his head.
"It helped not coming home to a mess," Kate continued, her voice low from their bedroom, and he pictured her cradling her phone between her shoulder and her ear. "So thank you for your help. I know you and Martha worked together to take care of everything while we were gone."
Ah, Lanie. She was talking to Lanie.
He had known that Lanie and his mother had taken care of cleaning the loft immediately after they'd left the city, but looking around, he realized that they had done even more over the summer. New pillows were on the couch, the window coverings let more light into the room, fresh flowers adorned the counter, and most importantly, there was no sign of blood or bullets.
"No, you don't have to do that. The housekeeper went shopping this morning, and I think we're just going to try to settle in for the night, get used to being back here. Thanks, though."
He heard her chuckle. "Yeah. I will, I promise. Even if it's late, I will call if we need anything. Okay. Yes. Goodbye, Lanie."
She emerged from the bedroom before he could pretend he hadn't been listening. She had changed her clothes, too, swapped t-shirts and ditched the shorts she had worn home from the Hamptons and pulled on yoga pants instead.
"What?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Castle shook his head, forcing himself out of the funk he had settled into as soon as they'd split up upon entering the loft. She was in a good mood, and he wouldn't spoil that because their house felt less than homey at the moment. "Nothing. That was Lanie?"
"Yeah." Beckett stepped closer, smoothing her hand down his arm. He caught her fingers with his, swinging their hands between them. "Just checking in. Espo texted, too. They know your mom and Alexis stayed in the Hamptons for a few extra days."
"I got a text from Ryan as we were parking. Wanted to see if we needed anything."
His wife's lips lifted. "Five bucks says they drop by tonight even though we said we were okay."
"Probably. We could always put a sock on the door to tell them we're fine, but busy."
Kate laughed, sweet and airy in the quiet of their home. The time away from the city had been good for them, but if he was honest (which he tried to be), he would say that re-establishing their intimate connection, both physical and mental, had been exactly what they had needed to recover.
"Very old school of you, Castle."
One shoulder lifted. "I like to stick with the classics, what can I say?"
"Okay, Mr. Classic. Why don't we eat something before we get too far ahead of ourselves?" She lifted onto her toes, swiping her lips over his with enough finality to tell him there would be no pre-dinner treat.
"If you insist."
She grinned, tugging him deeper into the kitchen. His heart stammered hard against his sternum, the nearly healed wound on his chest throbbing in response.
"Castle," Kate called. He felt her palm his cheek, turning his face away from the alcove under the stairs. "Hey, you okay?"
"Yeah," he said, clearing his throat. He was fine. There was nobody in the loft, lurking in the shadows to gun them down. "Yeah, I'm good. Just thought someone was at the door already."
Kate nodded, pressing her lips to the corner of his mouth. "Let's make pasta. From scratch. And your garlic butter sauce. Please?"
Well, that wasn't playing fair; she knew he couldn't resist her when she said please like that. Especially when she turned wide, innocent eyes on him along with the request.
"Okay. But only because you said please."
She grinned, dropping her eyes to make lazy trails down his chest. "If it helps at all, I fully intend to say thank you, as well."
He smothered a groan. Oh, it helped quite a bit.
"So, assuming Burke clears me tomorrow, I should be back at work in the next few days," Kate said, breaking off a piece of garlic bread and dragging it through the extra sauce in her bowl. "Want to come with?"
Her foot brushed Castle's ankle, and she delighted in watching him swallow hard. Playing with him was always fun.
"You mean after spending all summer together, you can still stand me enough to want me at work with you too?" he teased, wiping his mouth on a napkin. The meal had been rich, almost too filling, but such a worthwhile indulgence.
Kate knocked his shoulder with hers, settling against his side. "Mmm, well this summer we spent a lot of the time sleeping, so."
Castle chuckled. His fingers folded around hers, the touch both a comfort and a promise at once.
"I would be happy to come bother you at work again. Of course, I will have to check in at the PI office at some point, but I can do that whenever. After work, even, if you'd like to accompany me."
She nodded in easy agreement. "Though I'm not going to make out with you in the secret room if Hayley's there."
"You wound me."
She felt him go rigid at his own words. "Like you weren't angling for it, Castle," she murmured instead of drawing attention to the slip.
"Well, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. It's private, it's comfortable, it's -"
"Not going to happen. At least not this time."
"Oh, the sweet swell of hope," he teased, bumping her lips with his.
Kate grinned. Dork.
"Come on, let's leave the dishes for the night and relax."
Sitting at the breakfast bar had been her idea, a way of fighting the specter of Caleb Brown and that day, but she was tired; the trip home hadn't been long or particularly strenuous, but she was still wiped out and ready to sink onto a surface with a cushion for her back.
Her husband seemed to agree, sliding to his feet and scooping their dishes off the countertop, loading them into the dishwasher before she could protest.
"It was empty and there's still work to do," he explained, moving back to her side, ready to help ease her from the chair if she had stiffened up while they were eating.
She didn't nudge him away, but she didn't accept his assistance either. Instead, she stepped into him, bumping his chin with her nose. They were both strong and ready to push their boundaries even harder than they had been.
"You know, if you hadn't agreed to come back, I could've made it an order."
His hands fell to her hips, keeping her close as they made their way to the couch. They moved together, the dance well-practiced and easy, even after months of absence from their home.
"Why's that?" he rumbled, the corners of his lips twitching.
"Because someone is still short on their community service hours."
Even including the summer before she took over at the Twelfth, he was shy a couple hundred hours. Albeit they both knew the punishment was largely perfunctory, it wouldn't hurt to have the completion on file.
"Well, the captain's husband can't be delinquent on that, can he?"
"Mmm, probably not. Plus, if you wanted… after you serve your time, there might be another position open."
Castle's hand paused its lazy trail over her back. "I'm listening."
"I sneaked a peek at my work email earlier, just to make sure I hadn't missed anything about getting back. Most of it was junk, but I saw something about a civilian investigator position. Know anyone with experience in that area?"
Interest sparkled in his eyes. "I might know a guy."
"Good. I'll send you the email tomorrow. Now," she hummed, fishing his cell phone out of his pocket and depositing it on the coffee table beside hers before turning back to cup his face in her hands. "Did you put the sock on the door?"
Seeing Dr. Burke again for the first time in many months was strange, but more comforting than she had thought it would be. The therapist greeted her at his office door with a sincere smile and a warm handshake, expressing his happiness to see her well.
"How is Rick?"
Beckett smiled, settling into the chair she always occupied when she came for her sessions. "He's better. We spent the summer in the Hamptons. It was good for him. For me, too."
Burke nodded. "Glad to hear that. You look like the time away was beneficial."
"It was. Things had been… difficult before; I needed the break."
Her therapist nodded again, adjusting his notebook on his lap. "Now, I know we're here to clear you to return to duty, but if you don't mind, I'd like to treat this like one of our normal sessions and we can talk about your shooting as well."
"That's fine," she agreed. That might be easier, actually, since she hadn't seen Burke in some time; they wouldn't be diving into the shooting immediately.
"In that case, why don't we start by talking about what's changed since our last visit."
Okay, maybe not that easy.
"We might need more than one session for that," she drawled, drawing her legs into the chair under her, ignoring the way the movement tugged at the scar on her abdomen.
Burke's lips lifted a tad. "We'll take the time you need. Last time we spoke, I believe you had just found out you would be taking over at the Twelfth, correct?"
"Correct." It felt like it had been a lifetime ago, when her biggest concerns had been about her ability to lead effectively and making the transition from peer to boss. And then she'd had her first day, and Vikram had called, and everything had ended up in motion, rolling, rolling, rolling, until she and Castle nearly bled out on their kitchen floor.
"Kate?" Burke prompted, forcing her attention back to him, forcing her to take air into her lungs once more. "Talk to me about where your head is right now."
Her head dropped to her knee. "It's been a hell of a year."
"It has," he agreed, as patient as ever.
"I just can't help thinking that my first day as captain was the one that shaped everything."
Her therapist nodded, but offered nothing in return, leaving her to dig up the words she wanted to say, the explanation she wanted to give.
In the end, she started at the beginning. The phone call, the hit squad, LokSat, stepping away to keep her husband safe. Little by little, it all spilled out - even the explanation for why, through all of it, she had never once reached out to Burke himself.
"I thought it would be enough to keep people safe, to keep Castle safe, and still be able to end it."
"But you both were shot anyway," Burke observed, cutting right to the heart of things.
Beckett nodded, dragging her teeth over her lip. "We were. And Castle, Castle blames himself, I think. But it wasn't his fault, none of it was."
"It wasn't yours either, Kate."
That was going to take a little more convincing.
"It's still hard to reconcile," she said finally, looking up from her hands.
"It takes time. But just as you reassure Rick, allow him to reassure you. Reassure yourself." Dr. Burke made a note on his pad and changed the subject. "Tell me about the shooting and the days surrounding it. What do you remember?"
The first time she had met Carter Burke, he had asked a similar question, "What do you remember about your shooting?" and she had lied to protect the mangled, fragile thing she called her heart.
She told him everything today.
Beckett emerged from the doctor's office an hour later, wrung out but somehow lighter than before. She had another appointment in a week, but she was cleared to go back to work. Provided 1PP agreed, of course. Which meant she had another call to make.
Maybe she would do that over coffee with the man perched on the bench outside her therapist's office. He'd been hard at work with his latest chapter of Heat Storm when she left the loft earlier, but she couldn't say she was surprised to see him now.
"Hey, babe," she greeted, stepping close enough for their toes to touch. "You reached a stopping point?"
Castle hummed, pocketing his phone with one hand and linking his index finger with two of hers. "Better than that."
He didn't elaborate and she didn't push; he would tell her what he was up to when he was ready.
"Good. And since I suppose this means you're playing hooky this afternoon, can I treat you to some lunch?"
Her husband grinned, squeezing her fingers, burning away more of the weariness she always felt when she left a session with Burke just by being him. "I'd love that."
"'Kay. Where to? You pick."
Castle's head tilted in a moment of concentration before he got to his feet. "I have just the place."
He turned in the opposite direction from what she'd been expecting.
"No Remy's?" she asked, keeping pace with him, their fingers linked in the scant space between their bodies.
He shook his head. "Not today. Back to work treat."
It would be a treat, sitting at her desk with him, stealing fries from his takeout container after hers were gone. It would be like old times, just with a larger desk as their table.
"Can't wait," she said, knocking her nose against his shoulder. "So where are we going now?"
"Another favorite," he promised. His smile only widened at her huff of frustration. "It's a surprise, Beckett. You like my surprises."
Most of them anyway. Eventually.
When he led her to the unassuming storefront that housed their favorite Chinese restaurant, she had to admit it. She did like his surprises.
At least until they stepped inside, and the normally enticing scent of soy sauce and sesame oil made her stomach flip.
Well. That was new.
"You sure you're okay?"
It wasn't the first time Castle had asked, but she swallowed the rise of annoyance down. He was just concerned. He'd been so good about not hovering this summer - in part because he was recovering too, but she would give it to him anyway - he had kind of earned a little bit of helicopter husbanding.
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired." Her head lolled against the back of the couch, giving her a better angle on his face as he worked. "Aren't you tired? We did so much today."
His thumb swiped across the top of her foot. "I am, but you look - and don't take this the wrong way - you look exhausted. And you picked at your lunch. I know the doctor cleared you, but are you sure you're okay? It's not too much too quickly?"
"But I ate my dinner," she reminded him, lifting an eyebrow. "I was just a little keyed up from the conversation with Gates, that's all."
Her former captain had expressed relief over her recovery (Castle's too) and had agreed to allow her to return to work in two days, but Victoria Gates had also cautioned her about keeping a lower profile this time around.
"Hey, it's gonna be fine. You're a good captain, Kate. And you brought down a dangerous, powerful man, and got justice for not only your AG team, but also for countless others."
Beckett shook her head, reaching for him, whatever part of him she could touch. "We did. We did that."
Her husband offered her a soft smile, closing the lid on his laptop and stretching across the couch.
"Watch your shoulder," she warned, studying his face for signs of discomfort as he braced his hands on either side of her head. Her fingers connected with his chest, steadying him if he needed it.
"My shoulder's okay," he promised, dipping his head.
"Okay, good." Her chin lifted, lips parting in expectation.
To her surprise, he swiped his mouth across her forehead instead. Her temple followed, then her cheek, before finally his lips met hers.
"Come to bed, Beckett," he rumbled, brushing the tip of his nose over hers.
"It's eight."
"So? You did say you were tired."
"I don't want to sleep before the sun sets. It makes me feel geriatric."
His hand slipped over her side, warm through the flimsy material of her t-shirt. "Okay. I can work with that."
Curling her fingers under his shirt collar, Kate grinned. "That's more like-"
Her phone buzzed from the coffee table. Once, twice, three times in quick succession.
"- it," she finished with a sigh.
"You sure you want to go back to work?" he grumbled, though it was good natured. "Because I have a feeling we're in for a lot more interruptions like that."
Kate palmed his cheek, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to his temple.
"I'll put it on silent next time," she promised.
Squirming under his weight, she grappled for her cell phone, skimming the notifications - one email from Gates with a form she needed to fax, one game notification thanks to Castle's earlier fiddling, and a text from Ryan.
Glad to hear you'll be back in a couple days, boss. Javi's made a mess of your office.
