Woo! Chapter 3! This story is also cross-posted on AO3 for those of you on there, too. I want y'all's feedback! Tell me how I'm doing.
The first section of this chapter is a flashback, so it's all in italics. Any other italicized words are typically used for emphasis or showing the thoughts of a character. Chopper-speak is bolded. Any speaking through the Force or a bond is italicized and underlined.
So, basically, if it's in italics then = in someone's mind.
Personal headcanon for this chapter: The crew (esp Hera) call Ezra "loth-rat" as a term of endearment. (Except for when it's Chopper, because he never says anything nice).
This is the chapter in which the title and the song lyrics will make sense. ;) Good luck!
Enjoy!
*flashback*
"Kanan?" Ezra lightly knocked on the door to Kanan's room on the Ghost. Kanan cracked open one eye from his meditating and looked up at his Padawan. The Force around the kid was practically crawling with unease and curiosity, and with a quick glance at the clock, Kanan assumed Ezra had had another nightmare. He beckoned Ezra to come take a seat next to him, and the teenager sat down quietly in front of him.
"Something on your mind?" Kanan opened his other eye and settled back, waiting patiently as Ezra squirmed a little bit.
"I was looking at your holocron at some of Master Skywalker's lessons," Ezra began. He squirmed around some more. "And he was talking about some sort of bond between Master and Padawan where you can hear each other's thoughts."
Kanan's stomach sunk, already knowing where this conversation was heading. "And you're asking... what exactly?" He said slowly.
Ezra looked up. "Why don't we have one of those?" He blurted out. "Do we not have a strong enough bond? Are we even a real Master-Apprenticeship?" He quickly covered his mouth over the last question and looked up with horror at the slip. Kanan looked taken aback.
Stupid, Ezra cursed himself mentally.
Kanan remained silent for a moment and then took a deep breath, trying to think of the best way to explain this.
"What Master Skywalker said is right - some Jedi did have bonds like that. Some Masters used it to teach their apprentices certain lessons, and it was incredibly valuable in communicating over long distances, depending on if the bond was strong enough." Ezra opened up his mouth to say something, and Kanan held up a hand to cut him off, mustering up the strength to continue with the hard part.
"You're wrong, Ezra, we do already have a bond. Granted, it's weaker, which is why we can't hear each other's thoughts, but it still exists. You can feel it, if you reach out for my presence through it. Just because we can't communicate telepathically doesn't mean we aren't a 'true' Master/Apprentice duo." He tried to grin reassuringly at Ezra. Ezra was still looking at him, slightly frowning.
"Well, how do we make it so we can do that? Do you know how great that would be on missions? Or if we-"
Kanan held up his hand again, a pained look on his face. "It's... It's not like that. A bond like that takes years to mature. Even Master Skywalker and Ahsoka didn't have a bond as complex as that."
Ezra still looked confused. "We've been together for almost two years, though, haven't we?"
Kanan took a deep breath, mentally praying to anyone who was listening that he didn't hurt his Padawan's feelings with this. "Ezra, the reason I haven't fully extended our bond yet is because I haven't done it yet."
The hurt flashed across Ezra's face and shone in his eyes. Almost immediately, the teen threw up his mental shields, as rudimentary as they were. "Are you ashamed of me or something? Is it because I didn't grow up in the Order?"
Kanan was affronted. "No! That's not what I meant at all." He held up both hands in a pleading way. His eyes were completely sincere, and Ezra slowly lowered his shield, waiting for him to explain. "What I mean is... I'm scared to."
Ezra blinked in confusion. He'd never Kanan looked so ashamed. "You're... scared to? What's so scary about that?"
Kanan pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. This really wasn't how he pictured his night planning on going, this bringing up of old, not-so-fond memories.
"When a bond breaks, it's one of the most painful feelings a Jedi can experience, especially depending on the strength of the bond. When I because Master Billaba's Padawan, she created our training bond; and when she was killed by the clones, it was one of the worst things I've ever felt." Kanan rubbed a hand over the side of his face and looked over at Ezra. "I want to protect you from that, in case anything ever went wrong on a mission."
Ezra was frowning slightly, deep in thought. "I don't think you'll have to worry about that."
Kanan raised an eyebrow. "Oh? And why is that?"
Ezra's frown faded into a cocky grin. "Because we're too good for anything bad to happen."
Kanan blinked in surprise and tried unsuccessfully to stop his laugh. He put his hand on the side of Ezra's head and gently pushed him away. Still giggling, Ezra got up to his feet and turned to go back to his room.
"Good night, Master," he said. His curiosity and unease had diminished greatly in the Force, leaving behind trails of general satisfaction and faint traces of disappointment.
Kanan took a deep breath and closed his eyes, stretching out his bond towards Ezra. He threw all of his feelings regarding Ezra - the pride and awe of how much of a fast learner, the slight fatigue of putting up with his non-stop antics, the assurance that he would do whatever it would take to protect and care for him, and how much he wanted to him happy - and threw it into the bond, deepening it immensely. He reached out within it.
Good night, my Padawan.
The look of absolute delight on Ezra's face made it all worth it.
*end of flashback*
TIME: roughly 192 hours (8 days) before the destruction of Alderaan
LOCATION: Rebellion HQ on Alderaan
"Captain Syndulla, Master Jarrus, it's a pleasure to meet you again." Bail Organa smiled warmly at the two as they approached and held out a hand. Hera shook it, and Kanan followed, bowing a little in respect. Chopper followed along behind them, whistling
something spitefully about how he didn't get a welcome. Hera ignored him.
"Likewise, Viceroy Organa," Hera said respectfully. "And please, just Hera is fine."
"In that case, call me Bail," he said. The polite look upon his face faded into one of concern. "However, I'm sorry to inform you that this isn't merely a trip for pleasantries; we have a slight... situation on our hands."
Kanan raised an eyebrow over his blindfold. "Do we need to bring in the rest of our crew?"
The Viceroy hesitated. "Not quite yet. Just Young Master Bridger. And he's currently with Leia, so I can call them both in. She probably needs to get going on her mission, anyway."
He pulled out a communicator from his pocket and flipped it open, pressing a button. A tiny, giggling image of his adopted daughter popped up. Only one side of her hair was twisted up into a bun, the other half lay straight down her back.
"Leia, is Padawan Bridger still with you?" Bail asked.
"Say no," the muffled voice of the teen in question said. Leia giggled again, and Hera covered an amused smile. Kanan smacked a hand over his blindfold and groaned in exasperation.
"Ezra," he began. Hera chuckled under her breath from next to him, but immediately stifled it with a glance from the Viceroy.
At the sound of his master's voice, the teen immediately popped in the picture beside Leia. He put one finger on the side of Leia's head, and she began twisting her other bun around it tightly. "Kanan! Er, Master. Is there a problem?" He noticed Hera
standing next to Kanan, all traces of amusement hidden, and he grinned sheepishly.
"I'm sorry, Father." Leia said, finishing pinning up her second bun and pushing Ezra's hand away and then shoving him offscreen. "Yes, I'll bring him. We're on our way." She glared at him before immediately facing her father and giving the crowd a winning
smile. She pressed a button, and the image flickered away.
Viceroy Organa turned towards the couple. "Teenagers," he groaned comically.
Kanan couldn't agree more.
Ezra and Leia walked down the hallway in companionable silence. Ever since Leia had helped out the Ghost crew by giving up three ships on Lothal a few years back, she and Ezra had kept in touch and had remained pretty close.
"Do you have any idea what this mission is about?" Ezra asked his friend curiously. Leia looked over at him, running her fingers over her buns and tucking in any stray strands.
"Yours or mine?" She said with a grin. Ezra rolled his eyes. "I'm afraid mine's classified, Bridger. Although..." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "If it's a success, everyone will know what happened anyway."
"Then what's the harm in telling me?" Ezra said, shoving his hands in his pockets and leaning slightly forward. "Ooh, but what if it's not a success?"
Leia glared at him but held up her hands. "Fine. The only thing I can tell you is that it has to do with the plans for the Death Star." Ezra's jaw dropped, and Leia shot him another look. "That's it."
"How come you always get the cool missions?" Ezra whined. Leia jabbed at his side, but Ezra whirled back before from a tingle of warning in the force.
"Our ideas of 'cool' are very different," Leia said. She came to a stop in front of a conference room. Inside, her father was busy discussing something with Kanan and Hera, so she turned back around towards Ezra. "Besides, you haven't even heard the mission
report." Her eyes twinkled. "You may like it yet."
Ezra groaned. "You say that every time. Raising my hopes just to crush them later."
Leia smiled and put a hand on his arm. "May the force be with you, Ezra. Be safe." She used her other hand to press a button that opened the door. She pushed Ezra in.
"Hey!" He cried out.
Leia ignore him. "Father, I am preparing to get R2D2 and C3PO to leave. I also have the plans."
The Viceroy nodded his assent. "Good. Be safe, Leia. I love you. Say goodbye to your Mother again before you go."
"I love you, too." She said. "Good afternoon, Master Jarrus, Captain Syndulla." She waited for their nod back and turned, pressing a button to shut the door behind her.
"Mr. Bridger," Bail Organa said, waving a hand to several empty chairs besides the others. "Please take a seat." Hera smiled knowingly over at him as he slid down into a chair next to Kanan. He looked over at her and grimaced. An unruly tuft of hair on
his forehead bounced, and she made a face.
Ezra tilted his head to the side in confusion, and she mimed licking her hand and petting down a piece of hair on her forehead. Ezra's cheeks flamed, but he pressed it down and tucked it back.
"Hera," he mouthed. "I'm not fourteen anymore."
"I know," she said fondly. "But you'll always be my little loth-rat."
The Viceroy cleared his throat, and both Hera and Ezra snapped to attention. Apparently he'd already started discussing the mission.
"Sorry," Hera said, cheeks pink with embarrassment.
Kanan raised an eyebrow under his blindfold. "Is there something I'm missing?" He swung his head in Ezra's direction.
"Let's just get on with the assignment, shall we?" Bail Organa's infinite patient expression was beginning to fracture on his face.
"Anyway, Ezra, as I was saying and telling your Master and Captain before you came in, we've been getting several strange signals traced back to Malachor in the last few weeks."
Ezra's jaw dropped. "Malachor?! But... that's impossible! The only person never confirmed to get off was..."
"Fulcrum," Hera finished, eyes wide.
"Ahsoka is still alive?" Ezra gasped. "We thought she died! There's no way she survived that fight with Vader." He turned to Kanan. "Right? We couldn't have just left her there."
Kanan stroked his beard, deep in thought. He pursed his lips. "Ezra, think about it. I never felt her death confirmed in the Force. And I'm guessing that you never did, either. Your bond with her, while silenced, I don't think was broken. There's a slim
chance that these signals are actually from Fulcrum."
"We have to go get her!" Ezra said, standing up and gesturing wildly, just nearly avoiding smacking Kanan in the face. "It's my fault we left her; it's my responsibility to go get her back!"
"Ezra, this might not be real. This could very well be a trap by the Empire," Hera said. She shook her head, lekku twisting. "I don't know if this is smart for you to go on."
The Viceroy sighed. "We figured it may be a trap. However, Fulcrum has important intel and knowledge about... key aspects of the rebellion and its participants that could seriously be put to use right about now. On the off chance that this isn't a trap,
we really need her." He hesitated for a moment, taking in everyone's facial expressions before continuing. "And we - Mon Mothma, some of the other leaders, and I - have chosen Ezra to go alone for this."
Ezra's eyes lit up. "Absolutely!"
Hera smacked her hands on the table. Kanan looked appalled. "Absolutely not! Viceroy, he's only nineteen!"
The Viceroy smiled patiently. "Exactly, Captain, he's nineteen. He's of the legal age, both on Alderaan and on Lothal. He also has Jedi training and has spent years surviving and thriving on his own."
Ezra winced. "I don't know if you should call it thriving, so to say..."
The Viceroy ignored him and continued. "Plenty capable to go do a search and rescue mission, don't you think? And if this really is Fulcrum, don't you think she be more likely to listen to and approach Ezra if he's alone, rather than with a huge group
of people?"
"But what if it isn't her? What if this is a trap?" Hera argued. She glanced over at Kanan and gave him a sharp jab to back her up.
The Viceroy's expression shifted just a teensy bit. "Then it wouldn't be the first time Ezra has escaped the Empire on his own." He sighed. "Look, in any other situation, we typically would not send out a teenager to do the job unless it was absolutely
necessary; as a parent, I completely sympathize with you on this. But in this case, Ezra is our only hope. He's in training to become a Jedi, he's elusive, sneaky, innovative. I believe that he can do this."
Hera frowned, disagreement clear on her face. "Kanan?"
Kanan's mouth twitched into a straight line. "I don't agree with this any more than you do, Hera, but I do think Ezra could handle it. If I had continued to be Depa Billaba's Padawan, I could have potentially already been doing missions on my own. Some
nineteen year olds were even knighted during the Clone War."
Ezra fist pumped the air. "Yes!" He jumped up and starting running around and circles, whooping with excitement.
Hera looked up at the Viceroy and saw new found hesitation and regret of his decision in his eyes. She shrugged. "I warned you."
Zeb swung out of the Phantom and landed lightly in front of the crew. Ezra was shifting nervously back and forth, flipping through the report he'd been given regarding the signals. The landing strip they were on was overrun by attendants and rebel pilots
doing maintenance on their ships. They ran around the Phantom and its crew like they were invisible.
"Alright, kid, I think you're set. You've got enough fuel and food to make it there and back three times over." He leaned in so only Ezra could hear him. "And I put in some extra credits for ya to do what ya want with. Don't tell Hera." He winked and
then resumed at a normal voice. "Your lucky Stormtrooper helmet's on the kitchen table." Ezra's eyes lit up.
"I hope you didn't stink the Phantom up already," Ezra said, teasing. Zeb ruffled the hair on his head and pushed him away, snorting.
"Good luck, kit." He said, briefly resting a hand on top of his head.
Sabine pushed in and shoved Zeb out of the way. "Alright, alright, big sister coming through. It's my turn to tell the kid bye." She put a hand on his arm. "I put some paper and pencils for sketching next to Zeb's helmet." Ezra opened his mouth to say
something, and Sabine rolled her eyes. "Yes, I left you an extra blue this time."
"Thanks guys!" Ezra said, beaming. He reached out to throw an arm around each of their necks but was immediately knocked back by Chopper running into his legs.
Oi, Loth-Rat! Finally CaptainHeraSyndulla has gotten my messages and has decided to send you away.
"Aw, quit it, Chop; you're just bummed that the Viceroy said you were too untrustworthy to go on this mission. What's the word he used? 'Unpredictable.'" Ezra snickered as Chopper beeped indignantly. "Yeah, yeah, I'll miss you, too."
You are misunderstanding me again, human. You need to get your brain reevaluated.
"Alright, alright, go along now Chopper." Hera walked up next, patting the top of Chopper's dome and shooing him back. The droid rammed into Ezra's legs again, more gently this time with a pointed look from Hera, then wheeled off to go mess with Zeb.
Hera smoothed down Ezra's hair, and he squirmed to get away. "Your hair! It just never stays down," she said in amazement. He groaned.
"I don't know why everyone's acting like this," he said. "This isn't the last time we're ever going to see each other."
"You're just so grown up," Hera said. She pressed her palm to his cheek for a moment. "Kanan and I are both very proud of you, and we know your parents would be, too." His eyes filled, and she pulled him in for a hug, pretending not to notice when he
sniffed and wiped his eyes.
Ezra could feel the pride and worry flowing through the Force, and then something seemed to shift in her Force signature, and he jerked back.
Hera leaned back too, confused. Ezra looked at her with wide eyes. "Hera, don't panic, but I think there's something... different about you..."
Hera's look of confusion immediately turned into one of amusement. "Ezra, do you think you can keep a secret?" He nodded, and she leaned in close to his ear. "I'm pregnant."
Ezra blinked. "Wha-what?" He looked at her, then over at Kanan from where he was talking to Sabine, then back to her. "Seriously?!"
She laughed. "Apparently, human/Twi'lek hybrids are common, just rare. I called Rex and he said he could give me the contacts of another family in our situation."
"That's awesome!" Ezra said. "What did Kanan say?"
Her happy expression sobered a little. "I haven't figured out how to tell him yet. But if you're able to sense a change, then I'm sure he'll be able to."
"I'm happy for you," Ezra said. "You two will be great parents."
Hera smiled. "I don't know, I think we already did a good enough job with you and Sabine." Ezra grinned back.
Kanan walked up behind Hera and cleared his throat. "Hey, do you think I'll have time to talk to my Padawan before he has to leave? Because he seems awfully popular right now and I'd hate to be a distraction." He said, the corners of his mouth twitching
up into a smile. She snorted and whacked his arm gently.
"I'll leave you two alone." With one final glowing smile at Ezra, she left to go talk to the others.
Kanan put a hand on Ezra's shoulder. "Ezra, I know that this mission may have gotten your hopes up about Ahsoka being alive, but don't let it bias you. Trust in the Force; if you get to Malachor, and you have a bad feeling about it, it may be a trap.
This may be all some elaborate scheme by the Empire to lure you away for capture. Be careful."
Ezra bowed slightly. "I will, Master." Kanan tilted his head forward in response. Ezra waited a moment for him to say something else, and when it didn't look like Kanan would, his shoulders drooped a little. He turned to board the Phantom.
"Wait," Kanan called out. He rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. Ezra paused, a hopeful expression on his face. "If you need anything, just call us. I know it's a four day journey out to the Outer Rim from here, and the Viceroy said to use your communicator
only in emergencies, but we can be there as fast as you need us." Kanan said. Ezra nodded and smiled to himself as he turned around again.
Kanan didn't need to say 'I Love You' to show he cared. He shared it in other ways instead.
"And Ezra?" Ezra stopped and turned around. Again. Kanan finally smiled. "May the Force be with you."
In a flash, Ezra ran back down the ramp and threw his arms around Kanan. Kanan grunted and staggered back in surprise, but returned the gesture, holding him a little tighter than expected, like he didn't want to let go.
When Ezra finally got onboard the Phantom and sat down in the pilot's seat, he looked out the window down towards his crew. Hera had stepped up next to Kanan with a hand on his arm, and Sabine was standing to her right. Zeb was on Kanan's left. And Chopper
was waving his arms in goodbye at Hera's feet. Ezra flicked on the engines and looked at his family one last time before flying off.
He didn't know that this was the last time he'd ever see them.
The four day journey to Malachor was long, boring, and lonely. Ezra missed the companionate feel of the Crew on the Ghost; eating old stormtrooper rations by yourself wasn't as fun as throwing them at Zeb. He spent most of the trip out there either sleeping,
meditating, or going over the files Organa had given him.
The last page in the file was a handwritten memo from the Viceroy saying something about how the Empire was probably too busy with their other more immediate plans than to take time out to check out these signals. Ezra vaguely wondered what their 'other,
more immediate' plans were and if that's what Leia's mission was about. He wondered how that was going for her. Hopefully she was having a slightly more entertaining time than he was.
When he finally came up upon the black husk of a planet they called Malachor, the temperature in the Phantom dropped several degrees, and the hair on the back of Ezra's neck stood up. He shivered. This is the one place he never wanted to ever return to.
He turned on the scanning sensors Sabine let him borrow and sat back while it scanning the planet for a count of life forms; better safe than sorry when dealing with the Empire.
He leaned back in the chair and shut his eyes. The scan would take at least half of a standard hour, and Kanan was always up his butt about taking some time to meditate.
Ezra focused on his breathing, slow and deep, and began his descent into the Force.
At first it started out peaceful, and then he started getting flashes of the last time he was on Malachor. The exertion and effort it took to raise the walls in the temple. The soft, red glow of the holocron. The look of terror on the Inquisitor's face
just before Maul killed her. The echo of Kanan's scream of pain when Maul burned his eyes out. The glint of Vader's helmet as how towered over him. The swirls and hums as Ahsoka's white sabers hit Vader's red one. His final glimpse of Ahsoka throwing
her hand out to send him back. The steely gold glint of Maul's eyes.
With a gasp, Ezra's eyes flew open. He gripped his armrests tightly and jumped up. He panicked and swung his head side to side trying to figure out where he was. When he realized he was on the Phantom, he tried to let out a slow breath. He slowly loosened
his grip one finger at a time and leaned forward, head in his hands.
BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.
Ezra looked up. The scanner's results were back in: only one life form was on the planet. He shook his head and did his best to push the unwanted memories from his mind. He could focus on that later; he had a job to do. He tilted the thruster forward,
moving in towards the atmosphere.
"Well, here goes nothing..."
A dead flashlight, an empty rations pack, and five hours later, Ezra flopped on the ground at the entrance to the Sith temple, utterly discouraged. It was a lot easier trying to find one ex-Jedi with five other crew members all split up in different directions
than just searching by yourself.
In the last several hours, he'd trekked all over the underground catacombs, the surrounding 2 miles radius of the temple, and even the upper levels of the temple which he could climb into. Still no sign of Fulcrum. Either she was hiding from him, or he
was missing something.
He groaned, turning his supply bag over and shaking it out. A blaster, knife, holopic, and several empty wrappers fell out. He flopped on his back.
WWKJD? What would Kanan Jarrus Do? Ezra's motto for every tough situation in life. He rested his palms over his eyelids. Use the Force. Of course.
Ezra screwed up his face in concentration. Reaching out his hands in front of him, he focused on broadcasting his message through the Force to as wide of a radius as possible.
Ahsoka.Ezra opened his eyes. He could feel the vibrations of the message through the Force, but felt no response. He closed his eyes and repeated the same action again. Ahsoka, can you hear me?
Ezra? A familiar voice rang out amongst the silence.
Is it really you? Ezra said, almost in disbelief.
"It's really me," a voice said, amused. Ezra shot up and grabbed his lightsaber off his belt. A familiar Togruta was standing on the steps below him, both hands raised carefully. She was eyeing his mess of a bag with distaste.
Ezra immediately sheathed his lightsaber, his mouth hanging wide open. "I... We... We thought you were dead!"
Ahsoka shrugged and gave him a mysterious little half smile. "Details. I think we need to talk."
"So..." Ezra said, frowning. "What you're saying is that you've been in exile for the past 4 years? Seriously?!"
Ahsoka looked mildly uncomfortable. After Ezra had taken her back to the ship, they'd went on their way back to Alderaan. Ezra gave Ahsoka some new clothes, some food, and an actual bed and waited while she took a shower before they talked. Viceroy Organa
was thrilled to have received Ezra's message that Fulcrum was still alive, but he was still concerned that there might be another trap involved. He promised to pass on the message that both were safe to Kanan and Hera for him before signing off.
"Exile is a... touchy subject among the Jedi." She smiled to herself like there was a joke. When she saw Ezra wasn't laughing, she hastily continued. "I don't expect you to understand," she said. Ezra could feel the guilt radiating off of her. She closed
her eyes, struggling to come up with the best way to word it. "It was for your own good; I was trying to protect you from Vader. He figured out my identity; he would have been able to track me down again. That would have put the whole Rebellion in
danger."
"The Rebellion could've helped you! Put you in the WitnessProtection Program! Hell, sent you to Tatooine for all I know! But you just sat there for years and did nothing! You didn't even let us know you were alive! We mourned for you!" Ezra
looked at her, feeling completely and utterly betrayed. Sure, he was glad that she was alive, but that emotion had been quickly overpowered by the anger he felt as they'd started talking.
"I spent most of the last several years meditating; Ezra, the reason I've come back now is because I can feel that the Empire is about to do something big." Ahsoka spoke urgently, eyes silently pleading. "We need to prevent it before it happens."
"How do you know it hasn't already happened yet?" Ezra said pettily, crossing his arms and leaning back.
"You can feel it, can't you?" Ahsoka asked. "The Force has been giving off subtle warnings for the past several weeks. It's gotten really bad in the last few days especially, and I expect it to only get worse. Whatever the Empire is doing, I suspect they've
already started." Ezra remained silent, staring down at the floor of the Phantom in thought. She waited for his response, but Ezra only frowned more and pursed his lips. He avoided her gaze.
Ahsoka sighed and rubbed a hand over her eyes. "When you're ready to talk, I'll be here."
Ezra snapped up and looked Ahsoka straight in the eyes, face hard and determined.
"I'll never be ready to talk to you."
TIME:24 hours (2 days) before the destruction of Alderaan
LOCATION:Travelling through hyperspace
Yeah, it was a lot harder to avoid Ahsoka than Ezra thought it would be. The Phantom wasn't actually that big, and they were stuck together on the way back to Alderaan for two more days. Ezra had already done all minor repairs he could do in Hyperspace
and cleaned the ship from top to bottom. And he wasn't allowed to use any more communications to talk to any of his friends because the Viceroy was worried it would get hacked and tracked by the Empire. (And also because he had probably gotten irritated
with the... relatively high number of video messages Ezra had sent him of him singing a popular Cantina song over the course of the past 48 hours). Plus, Ezra's willpower of staying mad wasn't the strongest, and he knew that's what Fulcrum was banking
on.
Ahsoka hadn't really tried to force Ezra to talk to her since their disagreement. She kept mostly to herself by meditating, only bothering to ask him questions before she used something. Ezra wondered why she'd spend more time meditating when that's all
she'd done for the past few years. Even though it wasn't as teched up as the Ghost, the Phantom still had holo-net. They weren't Neanderthals.
Ezra sighed and leaned back in his chair. According to the clock, it was getting kind of late, and he still hadn't eaten yet. He bounced once, twice then stood up and stretched.
He walked into the kitchen area and began rummaging around in the cabinet for something other than stolen rations. He grinned when he found a bruised and slightly squishy Meiloorun fruit, but picked it up anyway and bumped the door shut with his hip.
He turned around to go sit back down; Ahsoka was already there, leaning casually against the wall and inspecting a wrapper. Ezra took a deep breath and pushed his shoulders back, planning on walking by without another word.
Don't talk to me, don't talk to me, pleaseeee. Ezra silently begged, his resolve already crumpling.
"How's Kanan?" Ahsoka said suddenly. Ezra's shoulders dropped, and he paused from the doorway.
Karabast. "Blind." He turned his head to the side. "But then again, you were actually there for that." Well, if she was going to try to guilt trip him, he was going to do it right on back.
Ahsoka let out a sharp breath. She looked down at the ground. "What about Rex?" She swallowed nervously.
Ezra stood for a moment, debating what to tell her. He looked at her; she honestly looked nervous and afraid for what he might say.
That didn't surprise him. He always suspected that there was slightly more to their relationship than he were told. He and Sabine had had a running pool on it. You know, before Malachor and all.
"Rex is alive," he said slowly. "He thinks you're dead, and he misses you. He cried for days, whenever he thought we couldn't hear him." Ezra swallowed. "But we could." Ahsoka's face crumpled, and she turned away briefly. When she looked back at him,
her face was emotionless.
"Do you know if he's on Alderaan?" She said, failing to stop the hope shining in her eyes. "Does he know about this?"
Ezra let out a deep breath. He shook his head. "I don't know. It's been a while since I've heard from him, actually. Viceroy Organa sent him on some extended mission a while back. That's as far as my clearance goes." He paused, a memory jogging his mind.
"Actually, I think Hera talked to him the other day. So wherever he is, he's okay." He lifted his head back up and continued to walk back into the cockpit.
"Thank you," a small voice said from behind him. Ezra paused and twisted his head to the side. He nodded and shut the door.
TIME: 1 hour before the destruction of Alderaan
Location: Travelling through hyperspace
Ezra woke up with a gasp and immediately screwed up his face in pain. Ever since Ahsoka had pointed out the warning tremors in the Force, he'd been feeling them more and more.
Groaning, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Rubbing his eyes and yawning, he made his way through to the cockpit and checked the charts.
Only 1 more hour until they made it back to Alderaan. Great.
Another wave of pain flashed through the Force, and Ezra grimaced. He gripped his side until the ache faded, and decided maybe talking to Ahsoka about this was okay. He needed answers. He twirled around in the chair for a bit, trying to build up the will
to go talk to her.
He finally got up and stuck his head through the door. Ahsoka was meditating in the supply room, but she opened her eyes and looked at him when he came out.
"They're getting worse." She stated, reading the expression on his face. She didn't even bother to ask. She rested her hands on her knees. "I can feel them too, you know."
He sighed and leaned against the door frame. "And? I mean, what's your plan? You've dropped off the face of the Galaxy for the last four years! Things have changed, Ahsoka! The Empire's grown stronger. Like, a lot stronger. You can't just run in
lightsabers a blazing." He was waving his arm around to dramatize his point, and his voice had gotten louder and harder with each passing sentence.
She looked up at him sadly. "When did you grow up so much? Look at you; you used to be this impulsive, over-eager little Padawan. But now..." She left her point hanging.
Ezra bit the inside of his lip and mentally screamed. He hadn't grown up that much. "Like I said, Ahsoka, things have changed." His voice was calmer now, and he glanced back in at the time.
30 more minutes. He didn't know how much more of this he could stand.
He turned back around to tell her that she needed to gather her stuff up and get ready to get off of his ship, thank you very much, when he felt the Phantom rattle with an energy wave of some sort.
"What the-" he turned to run into the cockpit but immediately felt immense pain strike him through the Force. He staggered back and grabbed a table, hunched over in agony. But Ahsoka wasn't fairing much better; she was gripping her meditation mat with
her left hand so hard that her knuckles were turning white, and her other hand was placed over her heart. Her eyes were screwed tightly shut.
Ezra squeezed his own eyes shut and sunk down against the wall. This pain... this torture... it was horrible. It felt like millions of people were just... gone, just like that.
And then it got worse.
The mental bond he had with Kanan shattered. The bond that had sparked the very first time they saw each other, back when Ezra was still living and stealing from stormtrooper on the streets, which had then grown over the years through crisis after crisis
and mission after mission as they began to care for each other, something so otherworldly and special and just right that even Zeb looked amongst them with jealously.
The blow from this shattering knocked all the air out of his lungs, and he gasped like a fish out of water. It was ripped from his mind in an instant. The slight hum of his mind that was just Kanan was gone, leaving nothing but a gaping, raw wound
in its place. There wasn't even time to protest.
This must be what Kanan meant all those years ago, the worst pain a Jedi could ever feel. And Ezra cried out, because he knew that only one thing could cause their bond to break like that.
The agony of it all made his mind woozy, and when the darkness came in and swallowed him up, he welcomed the release.
When he woke up, Ahsoka was piloting. Her face was devoid of all color, and her hands were shaky as she slowly steered the Phantom amongst huge scatterings of rubble and rock. He vaguely noticed they were out of hyperspace and filed it away. His mind
was still blurry and unfocused, reeling with the aftershocks.
Ezra looked down; he was in the co-pilots chair; Ahsoka must've dragged him there after he passed out. He rubbed his aching head and purposefully avoided the festering wound in the back of his mind.
"Wha-what happened?" He said. He meant to sound strong, but his voice cracked halfway through, and Ahsoka saw him for what he truly was: just a sad, scared little boy. He could see the look of terror on his face reflected in her eyes. "We need to get
to Alderaan. Something happened. Kanan-"
Ahsoka shook her head, and Ezra trailed off slowly. "Ezra... We're here."
Ezra looked out the window. There was nothing there but rubble - there was no planet.
"What are you talking about?" He scoffed, growing angry. "There's nothing there! Where is it?" He looked down at the map on the controls.
LOCATION: CORE WORLDS: ALDERAAN
He looked back up at the rocks, and it hit him. The empty space, the dust, the remains. The silencing of millions of voices, the sudden breaking of Kanan's bond.
Kanan. Hera. Zeb. Sabine. Chopper. No, no, no, no no!
Ahsoka watched all of this unfold on the teenager's face - the confusion, the understanding, the horror, and the grief - until he buried his face in his hands and wept for those he had lost.
She wept too, for the millions of people whose souls cried out; of the destruction of such a beautiful planet and culture; of those she called friends; of the annihilation of a complete and utter planet. Her breath shuddered as she realized the
gravity of the situation.
Oh, Anakin. What did you do?
Chopper
.
.
.
Sabine
.
.
.
Zeb
.
.
.
Hera
.
.
.
Kanan
.
.
.
Alderaan
.
.
.
... Please don't kill me. R&R.
