I am sorry to all my readers for not completing my stories, I am aiming to finish all my stories in the coming weeks. This one is nearly finished, keep on reading to the finished story.

Chapter 42

Chakotay woke up the next morning to the sun shining through the small window in the guest room in Kathryn's large house. He rubbed his eyes and checked the time, it was already 9:30 in the morning. He had been so asleep he had slept in well past his usual time. With a sigh he stood up and wondered over to the small adjacent bathroom to freshen up. After he had done that he wasn't sure what to do. He had made no plans with B'Elanna or Tom and he had been told in no uncertain terms by Tom that she had allowed him to stay the night in her house if he stayed out of her way. He wasn't sure what he wanted now. Did he really want to make up with her now? After all they had been through she seemed so determined to push him out of her life, surely he should respect that.

She had been up all night fully aware he was staying in her house. Tom was right he did deserve to know, yet something in her couldn't face the rejection. She sat on the window seat looking out at the vast land beyond which she owned. Could she ever ask Chakotay to stay here and would he be happy? Would she ever admit her love to him and he reciprocate. She felt sad, something in her knew the pain and the anger she would see in his eyes if she told him the truth of her operation. Though her chat with Tom last night had made her see, she had to tell him. That way he would understand. She was going to do it, she was going to tell him about her son, about how she got well again. This wasn't going to be easy but then at least he wouldn't be hanging around pining after a lie. She had wanted to ignore it, she had wanted to pretend it hadn't been that way when she had gone to Trebus but she had felt such a lie then, she had felt the disgrace and shame of it then as he had held her.

He decided to take a walk through her gardens and then into the small town so he would keep out of her way as she had asked. He supposed there was a hotel or accommodation of some kind in the town. He would make arrangements there for a week or so, catch up with Tom and B'Elanna and some of the other Voyagers before returning to Trebus one last time. As he strolled through the gardens he smiled at how well kept they were. He was admiring an unusual purple flower when he heard a deep voice from behind tell him softly "it's one of Lon Suder's creations." Chakotay stood to his full height as he had been bent over to admire the flower. She stepped up beside him and without looking at him continued "Some survived the Kazon invasion, Kes kept them and then Nelix after her, I salvaged them before leaving Voyager." It was fact, she had said it so matter of fact but Chakotay knew it was her way of asking him to talk.

"It's beautiful." He offered in reply "Lon Suder would be proud to know his captain still cherished his work." Lon Suder had been a troubled member of the Maquis crew who had committed murder on Voyager, Kathryn had imprisoned him and during that time he had created new plant life as a hobby. Chakotay looked down on Kathryn and met her smile as she looked up him and smiled.

Still holding the smile she asked softly "Going anywhere nice today Chakotay?"

He watched her for a second and then replied "keeping out of your way as ordered." For his part it was meant as a joke but he regretted it straight away as her smile faltered and she looked away.

"I see" came her icy reply then before he could say anything else she looked back to him and asked seriously "I wonder if we might talk?"

Now it was Chakotay's turn to be surprised "talk?" he asked with a smile.

"yes" Katheryn replied firmly "its what people usually do when they want to sort something out."

Chakotay just snorted and told her "you Kathryn Janeway are infuriating" When she scowled at him he told her "I don't know where I am with you. Please just let's talk but this time lets be honest and real about ourselves and our feelings." Kathryn thought for a second, nodded and then gestured to a nearby bench.

Chakotay followed her and the two sat looking out at the flowers in silence for a long second before Kathryn took in a deep breath turned slightly towards him but not quite looking at his eyes and said seriously "allow me to begin..."