Chakotay just watched her looking so broken. She saw the pain and regret in his eyes and she tried to reassure him by placing a hand on his chest. "Chakotay I love you" she admitted "I always have" her eyes were blue, bright and honest as she told him "more than life it's self." It was breaking her to refuse him and they both knew it. She longed to marry him but so much of her was so hurt, she didn't want to let her self be that hurt all over again. Nor did she want to hurt him. Starfleet had always destroyed them.

"So marry me" was all Chakotay responded to her deliration of love, he wasn't going to back down now.

"It is never that easy." She sighed. When he went to reply she raised a hand to get him to stop talking as she reminded him "Chakotay I agreed to marry you seven years ago" his face contorted in a look of pain as she reminded him of their failed engagement. "I gave you my heart then and I meant it. But that's just it Chakotay, at the first sign of trouble we gave up on each other." Her voice was soft not accusing but she was sad and unsure. Her mind was split, she wanted to say yes, fall into his arms and never look back but another part of her was reserved, jaded and hurt by the years that had gone between them.

"We were young then"

With a snort she replied "I am not sure age has anything to do with it."

"Kathryn we had only just returned to the Alpha Quadrant. We didn't know how to be here let alone here together."

She began pacing the room as she asked "Do we now?"

"Kathryn?" He asked her confused.

She stood still running her fingers over the metal bar that had been put in to run along her wall when she was injured and said stiffly "I spent the better part of the last seven years in the Alpha Quadrant in this room sulking and feeling heartbroken like a lost teenager sitting up here commanding my Voyager family." She snapped. When she glanced at him and saw he was looking at her sympathetically she growled "don't pity me Chakotay" then she quickly continued "you haven't been much better Commander, over in Trebus, I reckon you've been just as sulky, just as heartbroken" then turning from him she added "and perhaps a little angry because you believed I terminated your child."
He felt the pang of shame, since learning of Kathryn miscarriage their child on his first visit to Earth after leaving seven years ago he had been ashamed that he had spent five years believing she had terminated their child. "Now I know the truth." He told her seriously.

"yes" she said simply with a pained regret "now you know" her voice was sad, low and flat.

"I wont leave here until you agree to marry me." He told her firmly.

"and if I don't?"

Chakotay just smiled his dimpled smile at her and told her simply and firmly. "You will"

Drawing her brow together she placed her hands on her hips and said "your serious about this"

"I am serious about my love for you"

Turning from him Kathryn began pacing again. She couldn't think what else to say. He was determined and if she was honest she couldn't imagine him simply returning to Trebus without her. Folding her arms and lowering her head she stood with her back to him and said simply "Ok." It was sad and it was quiet but it was true and it was determined.

"Ok?" He questioned confused.

"alright" she said just as flatly and just as quietly.

"alright?"

Turning to him, arms folded and a crooked smile she asked in her firm command tone "Are you just going to repeat everything I say."

"no"

She smiled at him and then told him sadly "There is something you need to know"

"what?" he asked worry setting in.

"You wont like it." She told him her eyes watching him closely.

"What?" he asked again.

Rubbing her stiff neck again she told him "Now I am well again Starfleet has offered me a commission again." Her eyes lowered and she didn't look at him unsure how her returning to Starfleet would effect his desire to marry her.

Chakotay looked surprised but asked calmly "deep space?"

"no" she shook her head with a smile and told him "not at my age" then with a slight tilt of her head she looked ad him and said "vice Admiral. They contacted me yesterday."

Chakotay showed no emotion as he said "you agreed." It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

With a slight nod of the head and a smile on her lips she told him "I was temped to but no not yet."

"was?"

She gave him a full smile as she stepped right up to him and looked up into his face where he looked down at her "It depends what a certain Commander is doing with his life?" Chakotay didn't even try to hide his look of surprised as she said those words. Reaching up and resting her hand on his cheek she met his eyes with tears in her own as she asked him softly "would he marry a Starfleet Admiral?"

Chakotay looked at her seriously, his heart was pounding as he met her eyes. Reaching up he took her hand in his and removed it from his face as he said "He would marry Kathryn Janeway" then with his dimples flashing at her he told her "and would be proud if she were a Vice Admiral."

Raising her eyebrow at him she told him seriously "It would mean long work hours"

With a hearty laugh he shook his head and asked her "when has it ever not been with you?"

Pursing her lips into a slight smile she narrowed her eyes and shook her head at him and said "It could mean regular visits to the Deveron System to support the rebuild efforts." With that her eyebrow raised and she searched his eyes for his response to her words.

His dimples flashed at her as he wrapped his arms around her and leaned in slightly towards her face and whispered "I am liking this already"

Looking up at his face she chuckled and told him "I thought you might." Then almost bursting out laughing she added "It would also mean I get to kick Commander Paris up the ass for real."

"Would it mean an Admiral's uniform?"

Looking at him confused and pulling away she drew her brows together and told him "Yes" as though this were obvious.

He laughed at her confusion and told her "I always loved you in that uniform."

Her hands went on her hips and her left eyebrow shot up as she snapped "excuse me?"

"You looked sexy"

"Thanks" she said huskily with her brows drawn together and shaking her head she added "I think."

She then turned from him walked to the other side of the room and began typing things into her replicator "what are you doing?" Chakotay asked her stepping up behind her as the blue light shone and she reached out to retrieve the two glasses of sparkling liquid.

"champagne" She beamed at him spinning round to face him and handing him one of the glasses. He took it from her, he was confused now. "I propose a toast to our engagement" She added raising the glass towards him.

"You didn't say yes yet." He reminded her with a dimpled grin. She was an infuriating woman at the best of times.

"I did" she pointed out firmly lowering her glass and adding "I said ok" she shook her head at him with the hint of a smile on his lips.

"Saying 'ok' sadly with your back to me is not how I pictured you agreeing to marry me."

"Oh?" she asked teasingly "So how did to picture it?"

"I was stood here" he told her stepping up to her and almost towering above her, she could feel his warmth he was that close "You were here" he reached with his hand to tilt her chin up gently so she looked up at him her, eyes searching his lovingly as he told her "You looked up into my eyes and said yes"

"yes" she said simply with little emotion in her voice.

"with a little more passion than that." She growled knowing she did that on purpose.

"passion?" she asked seductively in a deep husky voice. The air between them as warm and Chakotay found himself once again annoyed with her.

"forget it" he hissed. Then almost in shock he looked at her and added quickly "saying 'yes' not the engagement" she looked sternly back at him as she spluttered "I mean 'ok' is fine" still she looked annoyed "I-"

"Chakotay shut up" she laughed moving even closer to him and looking lovingly up at him as she said in a deep husky voice full of passion and love "Yes Chakotay, I will marry you" and before she could say anymore he leaned in and invaded her lips with his own.