His consciousness wavered between reality and oblivion as Sam had trouble keeping a grip on his mind. Everything he remembered, everything he had been a witness of, flashed by his mind and piled on one another with barely any thought of chronology. It was like half of a jig-saw puzzle had its pieces forced into place to create a warped image. Everything was clashing with one another in his head. The good and bad moments. The victories and defeats. The gains and losses.
'Welcome back, how was school?'
'Angels descending from the heaven!'
'I can't keep doing this, Sam.'
'Give me the Allspark and you may live to be my pet.'
'Feeling lucky?'
'Orion Pax. That was my name before I was given designation of Optimus Prime.'
The only thing keeping Samuel Witwicky sane were the moments when he was awake. Well, not entirely awake. But enough to tell when he was among the piles of memories and dreams and when he wasn't. No scenes or images played those times as he was basically stiff in a blind space. Of course he tried to move his body those times, but it seemed like their own separate will. And though he was awake, he just barely managed to hear the voices echoing from within the room he was in.
First time he heard someone talking, he was caught off guard, but quickly recognised who it was.
Orion could only stare in a dazed state at the comatose body of Samuel Witwicky. His arm hooked up with a few of Ratchet's equipments, his neck now wrapped in a thick cast whilst his body was covered by human-hospital clothes, half-hidden by a thin blanket over his body. The sight was ungrateful to anyone who stepped in with how pale Sam had grown in only a few short days while his body showed no sign of movement other than the soft lifting and dropping of his chest.
When the mech found him that night, the young adult had fainted, and had left the leader with barely any idea on what to do. Luckily, Bee had appeared and restored some sense to the Prime, Orion heading to his CMO's med bay while Bee called for the doctor himself. During that time, it felt like torture for Optimus to lay Samuel down and wait for the other two. And when the two had actually arrived, they were then ushered out by Ratchet while he went to quick work on Sam. It was a few hours before he returned, but word had spread and the entire base was wide awake at 5 in the morning. Especially Orion, who kept asking the same question on the scout.
"Is he done y-"
"Optimus, calm down. You've asked that about five times. Everything will be alright."
Even Bumblebee couldn't entirely believe in his own words. This reflected in how his hands shook the entire time he sat with his back to the wall. A small crowd grew outside the medical wing as the two were barraged with questions, half of them left unanswered while the rest were only answers filled with defeat in their tones. Since there were still only a few people on base, it luckily didn't grow too loud before Ratchet had stepped out. The mob moved and looked to the doctor, but was pushed back with relief that Sam would live.
Albeit, not all of the stress could be removed as an attacker was still at large. And yet for the past three days, where Orion would've usually been hunting down the assailant, it was Sam that was in the bed. So he stayed, watching over his newfound love like a nun to a half-dead god. Ratchet didn't mind as long as the leader didn't bother him while he had the usual check-ups a few times a day, but it did make him worry how each time he'd come in, Optimus was found the same way he was sitting like the last visit. And two of the three days that have passed, the medic almost thought that the Prime had a glitch in his head when the same question was asked over and over.
Today, was no different.
"… Is he going to be alright?"
Each time Ratchet replied, it was more or less the same answer, just differently worded. "… I don't know, Optimus. I managed to keep him alive, but it seems he's the one keeping himself asleep."
"He's been asleep for two days already." Orion's melancholic voice dragged out.
"Three days." Ratchet corrected, now pulling his undivided attention to the leader. "Primus, Optimus, you've been stuck in here well over enough. Don't you think it's time to get out?" The doctor just didn't like how his Prime could look and act so depressing at the time. What they needed was a leader to rally their hopes up and catch their attacker. Not a depressing sack weighing the air down.
From what Ratchet heard, the base had been completely searched and the numbers were counted by the Autobots. They had asked each and every soul on base to give their alibis and had kept most of them from leaving for any unexpected vacations. At least that way, if any one of them was the attacker, which all hoped wasn't, they couldn't escape. A disadvantage about asking the humans to do so was that it only served to build tension in the air between the two species.
The voices weren't that hard to match up as only two people could've been asking and answering those questions in such a gloomy tone. That and those two were probably the only ones who could save him from the brink of death. But the atmosphere they gave off from the tone was anything but pleased of the situation. If anything, it almost seemed like they were about to run out of energy at any moment and collapse. But Sam couldn't tell exactly from his semi-dazed state.
A sigh pushed out of the medic before continued without waiting for an answer to his previous question. "You should move onto more important things, like finding that attacker?" Ratchet suggested.
"I can't see anything more important right now." Orion sharply cuts in with a dark look. He stared at the medic with same look as Ratchet obliged to return it. After a minute, Optimus looked back to the hospitalised body with guilt written all over his face.
There was a… weird silence that followed. It wasn't the type of quietness you'd find during any awkward or embarrassing moment. Nor was it the 'silent fury' he thought it might've been. Sam couldn't quite put his finger on it, but it felt as if… Then the CMO spoke again, confirming what Sam was thinking briefly.
"… I sure hope you aren't blaming yourself for any of this."
"Who else is there to? I was the last to see him. I was the one who left him alone. I was the one who should've protected him!" The Prime inadvertently shouted. He calmed himself when he and Ratchet noticed the quicken sound of the heart monitor connected to Sam. The medic pulled up a few scans for a few minutes before stopping when the sound regulated once again.
Oh how Sam wanted so much to shout back at the mech for even conjuring up the stupid thought of it being his fault. Every part of his will and soul wanted him to open his eyes and push up to do so. Albeit, his body still refused any movement or order given by his brain. The only thing he accomplished was getting his blood rushing through and by his heart.
Ratchet set down the pad of reading in his hand for a moment to give the Prime an annoyed look. "Optimus, you have to understand that no one could've expected an attack. It was only for a few short minutes too. It was Primus' will that you had actually turned back when you did. Otherwise…"
"But did I really save him? He'll be in this state for who knows how long-"
"But he'll be alive. Which means that he can still return to us." Wasting no time, Ratchet reached for the heart monitor by his side and pulled it forward for the raven-haired holoform to see.
"You see this." He pointed towards the continuous movement of the flat-line. "That is his heart beating. It's beating and alive. Optimus, you saved him."
Silence dragged itself back into the room, now only the sound of the monitor ringing aloud. By that time, the Witwicky guessed he must've drifted off again as the beeping began to fade away into the silence, like how he was fading into his mind set. Then began the second wave of memories to rush into his mind. Though this time, the scenes and image mostly focused on him, Optimus and Ratchet.
'Sam… Run…'
'You're Optimus Prime. You don't need me.'
'Don't you want to be able to say you had the guts to get in the car?'
'You can call us Autobots for short.'
'There are some things you just can't change.'
'Please don't leave us.'
Sam didn't really pay much attention to the memories, having very little reason to return to the past. So he stayed unmoving and thought nothing. He didn't wait too long as he felt himself drawing back to reality, though his eyes were still drawn closed, two new pair of voices rung out. Again, having lived with these people for the last two months or so, it helped him determine a few identities immediately.
"… You don't think he'll stay like this forever, right?" Arcee asked, her voice showing little to no motivation. She sat rigidly in her chair where Optimus would've been sitting. Luckily, they had finally managed to drag the Prime out of the room to catch up on some well-needed rest. Though, the process of doing so was difficult as they were dealing with Optimus Prime, Ironhide and Bumblebee did it easily with how little strength the holoform had to fight back.
And though Arcee sat up straight, it sounded as if the only thing keeping her awake and moving was…
"We can't think like that. Sam is stronger than this. We just have to hope like the last few times that he pulls through again." Bumblebee scolded, who had positioned himself just at the entrance of the room, choosing to stay standing when there were spare chairs lying around. His arms folded over the other to show his concern, if not his expression.
During that sentence, the scout brought up the word Sam was just thinking of. Hope. Was there even such a thing for him right now? Sure his mind was alright and intact, but his body would've been another thing. He couldn't tell how much time had passed, but he guessed that it had probably did a number on his body. If it keeps up, is he going to be forgotten and rot away? If he did wake up, could he have been paralysed? And what's stopping Elita from doing it again? He wouldn't be able to do a thing like last time, eventually resorting to Orion for closure and safety.
…
Why does his life always screw with those around him?
"Anyways, how is Optimus dealing with this?" The femme ventured, looking up from her seat.
Bee winced at a memory. "Not so well. They've had to rebuild his office twice already. Not surprising. I mean, we still haven't caught the attacker yet, and it's already been a week. I'm wondering how the base is going to hold up if this drags out any longer."
"We shouldn't joke about that. We were all rooting for the two to be together, and it did happen. It's just hard to imagine how something so terrible could follow so quickly."
"I'm not saying I hate the idea of the two being together. But that's the thing. Ever since we found Sam like this, Elita has been the one that's comforting the Prime."
A slight gasp followed the revealing information. An action Sam wished he could've done. There were many things Sam wanted to point out from the brief exchange between the two Autobots, but he'll stick to the main points. Firstly, they had to rebuild his office? Twice at that? Actually, now that Sam was thought about it, the mech would've been holding up better than Sam if their roles were reversed. He'd have probably destroyed the base now if he was alive and walking when Orion is damaged, or worst case scenario, dead again.
Next note he'd have to remember, how'd they find out that they'd gotten together? They were entirely alone for the confessions that night and he'd doubt the Prime was one to brag. That just made Sam suspicious of who'd been watching them that night then, for they would've also been the one to tell the rest.
Lastly, Elita's comforting Orion! Okay, maybe he was exaggerating it quite a fair bit. Sam made the prediction that if everyone knew about their relationship, then surely news must've reached Elita by now. In which point, she must've lied to Optimus about being 'okay' with their new relationship. Only way to stay on base and attack him again… he guessed. Speaking of which, why hasn't she attacked yet? He was basically defenceless laying there. Unless he was under constant surveillance, which wouldn't be surprising since it is the Autobots he's been living with.
"Bee! Elita is just trying to help!" The femme barked, just high enough to show her serious side without disturbing the human.
"… Well, I have my suspicions on who the attacker was."
"Bee!" Arcee shouted, standing up quickly as her chair slid a large distance from where she sat. Her glare intimidated the Seeker as he caught an idea of what was about to happen next.
It took Sam by surprise when he was pulled out of the world once again, but he guessed he didn't need to hear any more than he already has. But still, he wished to know a little more on what Orion's going through, even though he'd probably end up blaming himself for causing such pain. Sam had hoped for the leader to manage at least a little better without him, but he couldn't blame the Cybertronian for being who he is… So why was it so frustrating to hear that Elita was the one comforting him? Optimus was at least bright enough to know how well this is all playing out for Elita, right? But Sam knew that was wrong, Orion would always look for the good in people, rather than focus on the evil behind their intentions.
At that thought, Sam knew he was afraid. Afraid if it all played out in the end with him back at the start of the entire ordeal. Alone and watching Optimus far from his reach. Where Orion would return back to Elita, and forget all the things they shared that night. It'd be stupid for Sam to think that they'd stay together after an entire year. It was basically hopeless. I mean, who'd want to stay in a relationship with a lifeless, decaying body? He wouldn't blame Orion for the decision if it comes down to it. Only be hurt by the choice.
'When have you ever had to sacrifice something in your perfect little life?'
'You wanted the real deal? Wake up, you're in the middle of it.'
'The Autobots? So they need you the minute they can't handle it alone?'
'Sometimes you get to the end of the rainbow, and the leprechaun 's gone and booby-trapped it.'
'This is not up for discussion! You're my son! And we're all going together!'
'Your leaders have spoken. From here on, the fight will be your own.'
Those last few memories left a bitter taste behind as they appeared. Seems like it was only getting worse the more waves that appeared. Just more evidence how life had been terribly cruel to him. And it seemed like he was in such a similar situation only months ago in his apartment. Lifeless and without hope to keep on going. Only this time, he didn't think even Bee's talking could get him out of the dark right now. He realised this when he returned back to his body and noticed the change.
It was Elita. Sam could just tell that she was in the room with him. For one, someone was sitting on his right side and dipping the bed a bit with their right. As well as that, the air felt off and the pain of over a thousand blades were directed at him. Her icy cold glare running down his soul like a snake to its prey. The Witwicky did what he could to persuade his mind that it was just his imagination that brought about the presence. But he couldn't deny it when something grabbed his wrist with the same strength as the night of assault.
Then the femme's voice came out as harsh as he action. "I'm amazed you had managed to survive after that little meeting. And it is luck that you are being watched to this second by cameras. Only," Sam felt the air thicken and his stomach drop during the short pause. "They can't hear me, only see what I'm doing."
The young adult felt his breathing quicken even in his comatose state and his heart monitor beep a little faster. The fear that clawed at the back of his mind resurfaced while he tried to maintain control over his body and not make it to obvious that he could everything in his paralysed state. He had only hoped that Elita hadn't noticed the sudden change in breathing and pulse.
Elita noticed the sound of the human equipment quicken and grew erratic, looking back to the asleep being with disgust. "If you think that you can win Orion by pretending to be in recharge, then you are seriously mistaken when I'm around." The grip around his wrist tightened Sam wanted to scream bloody murder from the pain. Yet, he couldn't do anything but allow his heart to race. And in a second, the pain stopped and only left a sting where the hand was. Then she spoke again. "Well, it doesn't matter if you're awake or not. I won't just let you take my Orion."
This time, Sam forced himself to fall back into his unconscious state, using it as the only simple way to forget the pain dealt. Physical and mental. But he knew it would only return the moment he woke up, as did the feeling of numbness through his entire body. It didn't help that a new fear was being built from Elita's sheer presence, rivalling that of Megatron's. But no one could blame him right? She had tried to kill him, as did the Decepticons over the years. And the thing is, she almost pulled it through. Elita brought him to the brink of death itself, unlike his time in Egypt where he had literally died. Realising that, Sam didn't know how close he was to losing everything in a minute.
It had hurt to think back to that struggle, but he remembered something that happened quite common to those at near-death. One moment he was struggling with the hold, the next he was within his head, watching as the people important in his life flashed before his eyes. First it was the soldiers who he had befriended, William and Robert included. Then the Autobots, excluding an obvious two. Next were his two friends, Mikaela and Leo. Orion was the last, having stand in the foreground in front of his two friends.
'You're going to have to let me go, Dad.'
'Ron… Ron, let him go.'
'What I'm trying to say is, pull yourself another miracle.'
'So his sacrifice would not have been in vain, hallelujah!'
'… Then I'm sorry. It seems I can't stop loving you myself.'
Sam barely even listened to his memories as he again returned to the white expanse within his mindset. Exception was, the only one standing there this time were his parents, grand smile plaguing their faces… Maybe joining them on the other side wasn't so bad. They were the only ones that truly loved him until the end. And there's no chance of them or him ever leaving for a new family. So why bother staying in this world where everything he does goes so wrong for everyone around him? Where there's the chance of the Autobots abandoning the Earth. Where there's the chance of Orion abandoning him. They'd all understand, right? For him to be with his parents?
Sam focused on how his parents looked. His mum had her hair return to its original vermillion colour that attracted Sam to it as a child. Her smile as radiant as the morning sun when she'd greet him with breakfast or pull him out of bed. His dad had his hair return to its former dark grey, his skin having more colour to it than the last time they talked and his smile reflected his passionate attitude towards his family. Judy then reached out both arms, Ron offering a hand out as well, as both invited their son to fall back to them.
A great burden lifted off of Sam's shoulders as he watched them do so, the finer details now becoming apparent. The smell of his mum's flowers mixed with his dad's usual cologne. The combined smell was unique and reminded him of the transition between the seasons of Summer and Autumn. Samuel took a step towards them, a hand of his own already out to reach for them.
But something stopped him and made him turn around.
With his eyes still closed, his ears listened out for the faintest sound of another presence. Yet, nothing alerted him of anyone else in the room. Only still and serene silence. Until a small shuffling caught his attention. Then, something wrapped around his hand. It was warm yet rough. Large, yet gentle. Sam felt fingers tangling with his own as it quickly pieced together who it was. But there was something wrong. If it was who he though- no, who knew it was, then why is the hand trembling?
A second hand came down and held onto the first, the shaking lessening by only a small portion. Then something heavier rested on all of it. And whatever it was, water was running down from it. Sam honestly couldn't distinguish what the object for the next few minutes, but as warm air slapped his wrist, it finally clicked and made sense. A voice came which defied what Sam has ever heard before from them. He knew the person personally, and yet he could say he has never heard so much defeat within one voice.
"… S-S-Sam…" Optimus whispered, biting his lip while uncontrolled tears ran out of his eyes. He's seen humans experience such actions like this before during moments of great and joy or grief. It was different from Cybertron, where they didn't give any physical means of grief, but rather gave out an EM Field that reflected their emotions. So it took him by surprise when fluids generated out of nowhere the previous week. Albeit Ratchet explained it as a normal reaction, the Prime could not say he enjoyed knowing the information when his spark ached during the moment he grieved.
Orion tried speaking again, trying to control his emotions this time to form a proper sentence. "… S-Sam… P-P-Please, d-don't leave m-me…" He took a breath. "… I… I c-can't lose a-another person d-d-dear to m-me…" Another large exhale of air. "… S-Sam… I-I love y-you… always w-will…" There was a small pause as Optimus lowered his head even more, resting it open his hands that had encased Sam's own limb.
Two weeks ago, everything should've been fine. He should've guided his love into his room, checked that he was safe and sound, and stayed guard for the night. No, he should've done it the moment Samuel was on base. But because he didn't, he has to sit on a stool beside his love, where he laid half-dead and silent. It was all his fault. And it still is if he can't even find the one who attacked Sam.
"… I-I'm sorry… I'm s-sorry. I'm sorry…"
Sam turned away from the bright light and looked behind him, finding something he wished he would never have to see in his life. On both knees, Optimus Prime clung to Sam's other hand like both of their lives depended on it, his tears dropping onto the ground and a few being caught on the young adult's palm. He was trembling and mumbling incoherent apologies while his eyes refused to meet Sam's. A wave of guilt and regret barraged the Witwicky as he observed the ruined form, unsure of what to do. He couldn't just leave them, him, behind like this. Especially not in a way he'd ever want to see the leader.
Samuel managed to pry his eyes away for a moment, looking back to his parents, having now retracted their arms. Still holding the same expressions, Sam switched his gaze between the two sides and noticed something as he did. The more he debated to reach further for his parents, the more Orion began to fade and become transparent. And it was vice versa when he swayed his mind to continue his life with Optimus, the more his parents became transparent within the light.
So he tried as much as he could to reach for his parents, but refusing to release the form holding onto his hand. And when he noticed Orion began fading again, he stopped. Sam knew what he had to do at this point. Make a decision and choose. Just like how he had to make a choice at Mission City on what to do with the Allspark that time. How he had to make the choice of stepping into a warzone to revive Optimus. How he had to make the choice of fighting for Chicago, especially when no one else could.
… Like how Optimus had to make the choice of returning to Elita, or begin something new with Sam.
The answer was simple and it was staring him right in the eye. And as his final choice being made, one last memory flashed before him.
'Sam, forget about the past. I won't be dying any time soon. Not when there are still so many things holding me to this world. Including you.'
Something in those words struck a chord in Samuel. Things 'holding him to the world'? Sam knew how it was to lose such things. Many times. And he was certain that the Prime had gone through the same thing many times over as well. But compared to how long each race's life span is, he had to think for a moment on how much did both lose. How much more were they willing to lose? Better yet, how much more can they lose? Could he do a few years, centuries even, without him? But from what he heard, the leader has been going through in the past few days, how hard would it hit him to hear that Sam passed away in his sleep?
How would Sam feel if he heard Optimus died in battle? Alone and without anyone there to see him go?
…
His mind didn't need to second doubt itself. He lowered the hand raised out towards his parents and in an instant, wrapped both pair of arms around the crouching form. Little by little, the trembling stopped and the figment of his imagination had fallen into a quiet sleep, resting his head under Sam's chin. He would've allowed the planet to burn just to be with his parents. But for Orion, he'd give up the world, his world, Earth and beyond.
And as Orion's semi-transparent figure slept, Sam gave one last glance to his parents, thinking that he'd have gone insane for a moment and imagined what he was seeing. They were smiling. Even brighter than any time he's seen before. While their bodies were soon lost, it didn't stop them from giving one last wave of a goodbye to their son.
Movement stirred the Prime's attention. At first, he thought it was just himself, trembling on the chair. His next thought would've been that Ratchet had returned to drag him out like the last few times. But no, the movement was gentle and smooth like water. And it came from the hand Orion had refused to let go even in his sleep. Eyes grew wide as his processor kicked in and brought his head up and out of the little recharge. Orion brought his gaze up to the human's head, where something miraculous had just occurred.
Samuel fluttered his eyes open, using most of his strength to keep them open. While his willpower and eyelids fought against each other, his pupils adjusted to the light and went to work searching for him. Then, they made the first visual contact they've had since two weeks. Orion looked to him with large eyes, as if a God- or Primus, he guessed- had just descended. Sam noted how the leader's hair was ruffled while his face was stained with trails of tears, almost resembling himself during the time he wanted to leave the base.
Orion barely caught himself as he stood up from the seat with his hands pressed down on one side of the hospital bed. Orion prayed many times over in his processor, becoming a sort of a mantra, that it wasn't just a dream. It wasn't just his imagination bringing the human back to his world. That it was really Samuel Witwicky himself that had just opened his eyes and was now staring directly at the holoform.
He wanted to say something, but his mouth was left ajar, just trying to find the right thing to say in a situation like this. The young adult noticed this as well and had saved the mech the favour of doing so when his hand lifted up from Orion's grip. It was weak from the lack of energy within him, but he still managed to land it on the leader's cheek. And now that he thought about it… what should he say himself? 'Hey Orion! Just woke up from what was almost death! Wanna' continue where we left off?' That'd be an idiotic thing to say in such a tense atmosphere.
The Witwicky thought for a second before prying his dry mouth open and carefully speaking, unconsciously coming out as a whisper.
"Morning… Orion."
Finally, for the past two weeks since Sam was hospitalized, a smile broke out on the Prime's lips. His head leaned towards the palm on his cheek while small tears of joy escaped his eyes.
"… Good morning, Samuel."
