Act 26: Catherine

I roll on my side and open my eyes when I reach out but feel an empty space next to me. "Sar?" I call in a whisper.

I finally come to my senses in regard of what happened last week and came to Sara's place to apologize and have that long overdue conversation. Things got back in order and we laid down just holding onto one another then the exhaustion of the week washed over us, sand we drifted into a much needed sleep.

The clock on her nightstand indicates that we're barely past two o'clock in the morning. I sit up and pass a hand over my face before standing up. I barely step a foot in the living room that I'm startled by Sara's voice.

"You're alright?" she asks softly.

She's sitting on the edge of her window, holding her knees to her chest, leaning against the glass.

"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" I walk to stand next to her. "I woke up and you weren't there," I rest a hand on her cheek and she leans into my touch. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She shakes her head and returns to her contemplation of the streets. I feel a pinch in my chest at her rejection. We were so good at communicating before last week. I know I hurt her when I called things off and when I wouldn't listen to her, I know that it did impact on our relationship; I can't complain because it's my mistake but still it pains me.

Sara has always been someone reserved and I finally had been granted access inside her fortress, now I found myself outside again and it sucks. I want to kick myself for letting my insecurity get the best of me, for ruining something good. It hurts even more to think that maybe I'll never gain her trust back completely.

I run my hand through her hair and then drop it, ready to accept the fact that she won't say anything to me. She looks at me when I break the contact, there's something akin to confusion and distress in her eyes. She looks away, hanging her head down.

"Whenever I had a nightmare, Charlie would say that I should try not to think about it when awake so as not to let fear overwhelm me," she confesses with a voice so faint that I have to strain my ears. "I don't talk about it because hey terrify me."

I've always known that Sara was the light sleeper but until now she had never mentioned having nightmares. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. Maybe my worries about being out of her fortress were groundless after all.

"Come here," I cradle her head and bring her against my chest, she wraps my waist into an embrace and hold tightly.

I run my hand through her hair in a soothing motion and kiss her crown.

"I've missed you so much…" she tightens even more her grip on me.

I close my eyes as my chest tightens at her words. "I've missed you too," I kiss her crown again.

I realise how lucky I am that we managed to sort it out, but I also appreciate the fact that if it hadn't been for overhearing her and Warrick I'd have basically tossed away our relationship for nothing.

"Would you do something for me?" she asks after a moment.

"Sure," I reply with no hesitation.

She disentangles herself from my embrace and stands up to walk to one of her bookshelves she takes a small, used book then hands it to me. "Read for me?"

I'm a bit surprised by her request but I don't question it though, I take the book with a grin and extend my hand out to her; once her hand is secured in mine I guide us back to her bedroom. We take our time to find a comfortable position. I kiss the top of her head which is resting on my chest, then I crack the book open. I'm surprised to find the two first paged filled with a neat handwriting, ink slightly fade with time. I feel Sara's fingers twitching slightly but she doesn't say anything, allowing me to read the notes.

It's a letter from her older sister, Eleanor. She explains to Sara why she's giving her the book, how it was also given to her when she was Sara's age, how Sara might take years to truly understand it all, how it is still her favourite book even though she's 16, how she hopes Sara will enjoy it as much as she does and how they could make it their thing to read it together. She ends wishing Sara a happy birthday followed with a tender declaration of love before signing.

I feel overwhelmed with love and extremely privileged that Sara would share such a thing with me. I realize that it is probably Eleanor's last gift, and I can barely fathom how precious it must be for Sara.

The words fail me also I just content myself with a lingering kiss on Sara's crown, then I clear my throat and turn the page. "The little prince," I start reading.

Sara reads a bit with me giving a voice to the titular character. Though the story is written as a childish tale, it's deep, funny at times, yet written with simplicity.

I know I can't help the few tears running down my cheeks when we reach the beautiful ending.

Sara lifts her head up and looks at me once the reading is over, probably to ask me what I thought about it. She doesn't need to ask though because I couldn't help but shade a few tears at the beautiful ending. She grins shyly then kisses my tears away.

She takes the book and put it on her nightstand, then she focuses on me again, capturing my lips in a tender kiss.

Maybe it's because we've been apart, went through emotional upheaval this whole week or because we've shared something so important to her, whatever the reason that simple contact has the effect of a tidal wave of feelings.

Our hands soon find skin, and we learn each other's body again, slowly, tenderly, like it was the first time. When we reach the apex of our pleasure together I can't help the tears running down my cheek.

For the first time I can affirm without any doubt – even though I'm not quite ready to voice it out loud – that I love her. I love Sara.

I'm in love.

Damn.


The book is 'The Little Prince' by Antoine Saint Exupéry.

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