"We've got to get out of here!" Pandora said, getting to her feet.

Torch beams darted all over as guards ran across the grounds. Lights and sirens were coming from every direction.

"No, don't," the Doctor said, getting up and dusting off. "It's too late. What we've got to do is look like we belong. He put his sonic away and pulled out his psychic paper. "Here, let me help," he said and reached out, doing up her jacket zipper.

"Look like we belong?" she said in disbelief, holding out her arms. "There's no way they're going to buy that we belong here!"

"Never underestimate overconfidence. Now, let me do the talking, and just nod every time I say something brilliant," he said, then added, "but not too often. Quick. Take out your phone and pretend you're on a call." He hastily pushed buttons on his own phone at a frenetic pace, then shoved it into the front pocket of his hoodie.

The closest group of guards came running up then. Pandora rushed to surreptitiously pull her phone from her bag at an angle they couldn't see, then turned toward them with it up to her ear. "Stay where you are!" one of the guards yelled, shining his torch in their faces.

"Yes, of course we'll stay where we are, we're where we're meant to be." The Doctor said angrily, holding up his psychic paper next to his face. "I'm the Doctor, Chief Insurance Guarantor from Lloyd's, and this is my assistant Pandora. Looks like you lot have done a bang up job and we're stuck with the bill. What do you know so far?"

One of the other guards walked up and snatched the psychic paper away from him, examining it in his torchlight. "You got here quickly," he said.

"That's because we are good at our jobs. I'll ask again, what do you know so far?" the Doctor demanded, taking back his psychic paper and stuffing it in the inside pocket of his hoodie.

The guard looked flustered. "Well, not much. The alarms went off two minutes ago, and we're securing the perimeter. No one has gotten out, we're sure of that."

"I mean, what's been taken," the Doctor grabbed the man's torch and pointed it at the tag on his uniform, "MacLeod?"

"Well, like I said, we don't know much yet, sir. Something from the Queen's Collection most likely-"

"I know it's from the Queen's Collection, it's my alarm that was tripped. If you don't know anything, can you take me to someone who does?"

"Yeah," he stammered, starting to sweat. "Um, yes sir. I'll take you to our security room where we're looking over the video. They'll know something by now."

"Good, now we're getting somewhere MacLeod. Pandora! Tell them we'll have an update in two minutes. I need your observation skills. Lead the way, MacLeod."

Pandora said a few words in a hushed tone, then pretended to hang up. The guard turned and headed quickly toward the Palace. The Doctor and Pandora followed.

They got to the security room to find a pair of guards arguing over fault. They fell silent as the new guard entered with the Doctor and Pandora. "Chief Insurance Guarantor from Lloyd's", MacLeod mumbled, then stepped aside.

"Before the finger pointing starts back up, let's be very clear. You are most likely both fired already. The question at this point is who is criminally liable. And rest assured I will be paying close attention to your next words. Now, the guards outside are woefully under-informed. What do you know?" The Doctor glowered at them menacingly. "Impress me."

Pandora nodded sternly.

The two guards stammered and looked at each other for a bit before one of them finally said, "We know they were good. As I'm sure you know, the security system in that room was state of the art, and they knew what to bypass, and in what order. The laser grid was cut, but the signal never registered here. The temperature sensor registered a constant 72.13 Fahrenheit throughout the theft, the motion sensor never came on - we're looking into that still - and just look what we got on camera."

He motioned to the other guard, who pushed his rolling chair to a console and he pressed a button. A video feed of the main exhibit room came up and everyone crowded around. Nothing happened at first, but then a blob of static entered the room. The static moved slowly across the room to the central case, blotting it out entirely. A few moments later there was indistinct movement at the very top of the screen, black on black. Then there was a light at the top of the screen, and the static moved back off-screen. When it was gone, the case was missing as well.

The Doctor watched all of this gravely. "So you have nothing," he said dangerously. "I-" he started, but then his phone rang. He dug it out of his hoodie pocket and turned away from the display. "Doctor here," he said. "Heading north?" he confirmed, then looked at his watch. "Inform the police. We're on our way." He hung up the phone.

"It looks like a traffic cam just did your job for you gentlemen. I want that video enhanced. Forget about the staticy bit on the bottom, there's something hiding in the shadows at the top. Pandora, let's go."

They were unchallenged on the way out, and the Doctor hailed a cab off the Pond Gardens.

"That was brilliant, Doctor. I was sure we were nicked," Pandora said laughing as they tumbled into the back of the cab.

"Paddington Station," the Doctor said to the cabbie. "Well, it helps that we didn't take anything," he then said to Pandora rather more quietly.

"You set your phone to ring on a timer, right?"

"Yes," he said, and started biting his nails, deep in thought.

"So, who were those people?" Pandora asked.

"Well, the one was the Lady Christina De Souza, as I said. She's a thief, as well as minor royalty. She made it onto Interpol's most wanted list, and she's saved the world. The dangerous one though, he is a Time Lord, like me. He calls himself the Monk." He was silent for a while, but his face told Pandora exactly what the Doctor thought of the Monk. Finally, he added, "He's a meddler."

"What do you mean, meddler?"

"Well, I've told you what I used to do. I travelled through time and space seeking out the best of it and experiencing its wonders. Along the way, I would correct anything that was going atrociously wrong; save lives, topple the odd oppressive regime and the like. The Monk thinks that he and I are alike. He also travels through time and changes the course of events, but whereas I would do so for the benefit of the people living there, he alters the outcomes to benefit himself. He manufactures conflicts and disasters and uses the confusion to collect treasures that will just be assumed destroyed.

"He does it for vanity," the Doctor spat, "and for personal wealth." The Doctor was quiet for a while, as he sat biting his thumbnail and staring into space, then he burst out, "Most of the artwork still missing after Nazi occupation are in his collection. He once orchestrated a Norman invasion to try to throw the Battle of Hastings."

"So you two go way back then?" Pandora asked.

The Doctor ignored her. He spoke as if he didn't even know she was there. "I hold him personally responsible for the deaths of Lucy Miller, Tamsin Drew and my great-grandson, Alex. And how did he survive the Time War...?"

Pandora wanted to ask about the great-grandson thing, but decided now wasn't the time. "Okay Doctor, what are we going to do?" Pandora said.

The Doctor finally snapped out of it. "If the Monk is stealing something so brazenly, he must expect there to be a war or disaster to cover it up for history. I know this time period, and there was no such war or disaster in the UK. That means he must be planning to create one. Right now that's our main concern. What has he orchestrated, and how do we stop it? Once we know that... Well, the next bit is personal."

"Whatever it is, Doctor, I'm with you," Pandora said, laying a hand on his.

The Doctor smiled faintly, but pulled his hand back. "Next I need to give Christina a chance. I owe her that. But we'll worry about that in the morning. I can't imagine the Monk has completed his collection for now, and other targets will be too hot to hit tonight. Let's get some rest and meet at the library in the morning. We need to do some research."


The next morning, Pandora lit out early, leaving a note to thank the seamstress for the pasta, and making sure the window to the fire escape was shut tightly. She sat on a bench on Porchester to kill some time peoplewatching.

She'd nearly forgotten she had a phone until it rang in her shoulder bag, startling her. She dug it out and saw the caller ID read 'Spaceman' and had a selfie of the Doctor. He was calling from the library next block over, and it was just opening. She packed her things up, picked up her box and met the Doctor at the door.

The Doctor found a spot at a computer, and Pandora found an outlet for her tablet across the table from him.

"Okay," Pandora said as soon as she'd connected her tablet to the library's wifi, "what exactly are we looking for?"

"Recent news. Headlines. Anything out of the ordinary. Terrorist activity, bus bombings-" the Doctor looked around, then lowered his voice and continued. "Bus bombings, border incursions, recent earthquakes. It's hard to be specific, but the Monk could be behind any of it. Just let me know if something doesn't feel right."

Pandora pulled up a news site and started browsing headlines. "Tom Hiddleston is dating that singer from the States. Does that count?"

The Doctor's face slowly appeared around the side of the monitor wearing a disapproving expression.

"Kidding! Kidding," Pandora said. The Doctor went back to his research and Pandora lapsed into silence, scrolling through Politics and International.

Half an hour passed this way, when the Doctor broke the quiet. "Spending so much time with Obelix, I've been thinking about getting my own dog, but I can't decide on a name. What do you think about Sally?"

Pandora looked up from the story she was reading. It didn't seem likely the Monk was behind the Zika outbreak. "Um, what? Sorry, dog names? Sally?"

"No?" He looked back at his screen and clicked his mouse. "How about Maggie?"

"We're talking about a dog, right?"

Click. "No then? How about... Sadie?"

Pandora sat up a little straighter and her eyes flashed as she set her tablet down on the table. She had a look on her face that was equal parts suspicion and worry. "What are you doing over there?" she asked quietly.

She stood up and quickly moved around the table. The Doctor rapidly clicked the mouse several times. When Pandora got into a position to see his monitor, he was on a science news site, looking at recent trends in global weather.

"What do you mean, what am I doing?" the Doctor asked innocently. "What were you doing?"

Pandora watched his expression with obvious disbelief. "How about I sit on this side with you?" She reached across the table and slid her tablet over to her. She started scrolling through headlines again, but with one eye on the Doctor's screen.

"Be my guest," the Doctor said. He clicked on another article link. "How about Debra?"

Pandora set down her tablet again, exasperated. "How about Moxy? Or Shadow, or Winnipeg? How about something that sounds remotely like a dog name, not a person's?"

"Hmm. I'll think about it." The Doctor tried another site. Most of the stories were of a similar nature, but one caught his eye. "Wait a minute, that's not right." He clicked on the story and Pandora read over his shoulder. The gist of the article was that the most recent tracking data suggested a 14% chance of an asteroid called Apophis colliding with Earth in 2016. "Apophis won't even approach the Earth until 2029, and even then it won't hit."

He performed an internet search, and found several other articles saying the same thing, posted within the last couple weeks and quoting the 14% figure. "I've got to see this for myself," the Doctor said under his breath.

He hit some key combination to open a command prompt, which caused a dialog to pop up asking for the Administrator password. He started typing at lightning speed. The dialog disappeared and a terminal window came up. Before Pandora knew it a VPN window appeared for NASA's internal network.

"Whoa, Doctor, I don't think you should be doing that..." Pandora stood up and started looking around nervously.

"It's okay," he said absently, fingers flying across the keyboard. Odd symbols that weren't on the keyboard and mathematical formulae filled the screen. Dialogs appeared and disappeared.

She caught one as it briefly appeared, it said, "Aligning satellites..."

Finally the Doctor stopped typing and a graphic appeared on screen, showing arcs in various colors, then it overlaid another arc, section by section with a circle labeled '99942A' moving to appear at the end of each new section. In the upper right corner was a box containing a date and a percentage. It started with today's date and one hundred percent. As the date went up, the percentage went down. Three days later, the simulation ended with the circle intersecting with another arc in blue. The percentage read 68.

"What does that mean?" Pandora asked.

The Doctor pointed, speaking in low tones. "The blue line represents Earth's orbit. That circle there is us. 99942A is the near-Earth asteroid Apophis. 68% chance they collide in three days."

"But the article said fourteen percent!" Pandora whispered urgently.

"My calculations are more accurate. To get any more accurate than this we'd need to launch better satellites."

Pandora looked around the library again and leaned in closer, speaking in a low voice. "Okay, who do we tell about this? I mean, obviously not the general public because that would cause a panic, but there's got to be a Bruce Willis out there with drills and nukes, right?"

The Doctor looked up at Pandora, disbelieving. "You know that's fiction, right? And if they did nuke the asteroid, we'd just be hit by lots of little ones, which would hurt at least as badly."

"Then what are we going to do?"

"The asteroid can wait. We need to stop the Monk. He must have nudged that asteroid toward the Earth to cover up his thefts."

"His and Christina's," Pandora corrected him.

The Doctor lost his train of thought and started biting at his thumbnail again. "Yes - and Christina's." His eyes darted back and forth, though he didn't seem to be focusing on anything in particular.

"Change of search terms," he said finally, snapping out of it. "Let's see what's worth stealing if we've only got three days left to live."


The Museum of London is, unlike Hampton Court Palace, in an urban center, and easier to approach on foot. It is also much more modern, with modern locks on modern doors and modern surveillance systems built into the very design. This also meant that it relied more heavily on the automated security and so had fewer guards for the Doctor and Pandora to dodge on their way in long after closing that night.

The item the Doctor thought the Monk would be after was in the section 410 - 1558, which was a very wide date range in Pandora's mind, but the exhibit seemed no larger than any of the others. The Doctor had turned off any security instruments just long enough for them to pass by, then re-enabled them. There was no need to warn Lady Christina that they were here already. Pandora and the Doctor crouched in the darkness of the museum for hours, reminding Pandora of how they had crouched in the darkness of a young boy's room a month or so back, waiting for a monster to come out of his closet. The room they were in contained items from the Battle of Hastings, and the time period just before hand. There were display boxes containing ancient coins, scraps of cloth, metal stemware and cutlery, and illustrated historical accounts. Taking up the entire far wall was an annotated photograph of the Bayeux Tapestry, and in front of it, one large case, lit internally.

Pandora had to shift a bit, one of her legs had gone asleep from sitting on her box in the same position for so long. "Are you sure this is the one? Plenty of other exhibits had more valuable items," she whispered.

"Yes, I'm sure," the Doctor responded. He indicated the large case behind them boasting a single battered and rusted item. "This is the sword of Harold Godwinson, Harold the Second. Shot through the eye by an unknown archer in the Battle of Hastings, 14 October, 1066. I think the Monk's been after it for a thousand years. There's no way he's leaving it for an asteroid to vaporize in three days."

Suddenly the Doctor tensed at a nearby sound. He moved to stand directly next to her. "Stay perfectly still, and absolutely quiet," he whispered out of the side of his mouth. He fumbled around in the pocket of his hoodie and pulled out a small button that looked like a garage door opener. He pressed the button with a barely audible click, and a small red led began to glow.

A guard walked into the room, and shone the beam of his torch around. First at the sword that was its centerpiece, then around at the other exhibits at the edges of the room. He pointed his torch into the dark corners of the room, twice passing the beam directly over the Doctor where he stood, but apparently not seeing either him or Pandora still sitting on her box. He pressed a button on the side of a radio transceiver clipped at his shoulder and spoke into it. "Godwinson Room clear, heading into the Confession Chamber. Over."

"We're not calling it that. Over," said a voice on the other end.

The guard smiled, pleased with himself, and continued along into the next room. "Maybe not, but you should. Come on, Edward the Confessor?" His voice trailed off, and they could see the illumination of his torch bob and weave off into the distance.

"Let me guess," Pandora whispered. "Perception filter?"

"Not exactly. More of a psychic barrier," he said clicking it back off. "I didn't know what our surroundings would look like to put up a convincing hologram, so I built this little gadget instead. All it does is subtly suggest whatever inside the field is not even important enough to pay attention to, much less remember. Wouldn't work on cameras or the like though. Also eats through batteries like crazy. Those twenty-eight seconds are about all we're going to get out of it. Let's hope he doesn't come back this way."

Suddenly, they heard the wheezing, grinding noise from the night before. "They're not even trying the subtle approach," the Doctor commented. Pandora pointed to a section along the wall where a mannequin displaying period appropriate chainmail armor, helmet and cloak was slowing appearing out of nowhere.

"That's got to be the thing from last night, the, um, Tardis, but it looks so different," Pandora said, standing.

"Sorry, yes. Look, I don't intend to keep these things from you, but I just never seem to find the time to explain, and when I do have ample time, nobody believes me. This is one of the times when I don't have time. The short version is that Tardises can look different on the outside."

The chainmail on the side of the dummy hinged outward and Lady Christina stepped out. She was dressed much the same as the night before, but she was holding a device with a large screen, handles on either side and a long antenna. She swept the room with it and stopped when it was pointed at the Doctor and Pandora. "You were right," she said, looking back into the Tardis. "But no perception filter or anything. They're just standing right there."

She tossed the device back inside, and the Monk stepped out carrying it casually in one hand. "Well Doctor," he said with a smug smile, "I wish I could say this was a surprise."

"Hello Monk. I can see this regeneration is no leaner than your previous ones," the Doctor said.

The Monk patted his portly belly in a self-effacing manner. "It's no secret I enjoy the finer things. And the regenerations haven't improved your fashion sense. You were dressed as a cowboy, the last time we met as I recall?"

The Doctor flipped up his hood and straightened the hem of his hoodie. "Yes, well, thank you for that. Most people think I was playing at Byron or something. But enough of the banter. You are here for the sword and I can't let you take it."

Christina interrupted them. "Correction, we are here for the sword, and you can't stop us." She walked up to the case and stepped slowly around it, examining it in detail while ignoring the sword completely.

"Christina, stay away from the Monk. You don't know him like I do."

"Is that a fact?" she asked without looking away from the case. "I'm not really sure I know you either. Last time I saw you, you were fond of suits and overcoats and Chucks. And you were hot. What happened to you?" Finally she looked at him, but with a playful smile.

"I died. Rather a lot. But you have to trust that I'm still me inside, and you don't want to help this man. He will hurt you, and he doesn't care how many people die so that he can collect these baubles and trinkets."

He turned to the Monk. "How many people are going to die just so that you can hang a moldy old sword over your mantle?"

Christina spoke up again, her smile gone. "So you know about the asteroid. Then you know we can't save everyone, but we can prevent works of art and important pieces of history being destroyed."

The Doctor turned back to Christina. "But they shouldn't die. I've been to the future. Apophis never hits the Earth, not in three days, not in five hundred."

"But you're wrong Doctor. I didn't believe it either, even when the Monk showed me the history books from the 22nd century. I had to see it for myself. The Monk showed me. His Tardis hung in orbit around the Earth, three days from now, and I watched the asteroid slam into the Earth just South of Bedford." She walked over to the Doctor, standing very close and examining his face as she continued. "Everything north of Reading was a crater. The entire population of the U.K. and Ireland, wiped out in an instant. Millions more across France, Belgium and the Netherlands. Plumes of ash and dust were covering the rest of Europe, tsunamis were heading toward North America, and the death toll was only going to go up. I couldn't watch any more."

She stood and stared at the Doctor. Daring him to contradict her, even accusing him for his lack of sympathy. "That's what I thought. Now, excuse us while we preserve a few items of cultural significance for future generations." She turned to walk back to the case, but the Doctor caught her by the wrist.

"But the asteroid never should have hit the Earth," he said in empathetic tones. "The only way it could have is if it got diverted. Just a little nudge, just a slight gravity assist would have been enough at just the right moment. And that's just what the Monk does. He doesn't want to get in trouble with our people, so things can't simply disappear out of time. There has to be some sort of disaster, or a war, where things do tend to get lost or destroyed. So, he creates these conditions, and the Time Lords don't notice."

"But the history book-"

"So he diverted the asteroid, quickly visited the future, got just the proof you would believe and brought it back to the here and now. Probably with a list all prepared for items he wanted 'saved.' Am I right?"

"No," Christina said defiantly. "We worked on it together. Perhaps you've forgotten, Doctor, but I don't do the side-kick role. That's for him. It's my decision what we go after-"

"And was Godwinson's sword on your to-do list?"

"No, but I-"

"And at what future date did you two intend to return these 'items of cultural significance?'"

Christina raised her voice, "We hadn't gotten that far yet."

The Monk cleared his throat. "I am so sorry to interrupt, but all this is taking way too long." He walked over to stand next to the case containing the sword and indicated the device he was holding. "I was expecting you, and I knew you'd try to stop me, so I took precautions." He pressed a button on one of the handles. "I included a recall function on this device so that my Tardis would home in on its location." The suit of armor faded away with a wheezing grind, and the Monk waved goodbye with a self-satisfied smile.

"Monk! No, wait," Christina called out, but a large packing crate slowly appeared in the middle of the room directly around the Monk and the case containing Harold Godwinson's sword.

The Monk's laughter faded away as the crate appeared around him. Christina ran to it and pounded on the side. "Don't you dare leave without me! Let me in!"

The cyclic wheezing sound started again, and the crate slowly disappeared. The Monk and the case with the sword were gone.