This happening has been on my mind for a while...don't know why!
I was currently walking into school with Edward. He seemed off today, very distant. He was giving me short answers and wasn't even holding my hand. When we got to the point where we separated for our classes I wanted to bring it up.
"Are you mad at me?" I asked staring him straight in the eyes. He didn't look angry, more nervous and sad. "No Bella…no of course not," he said quickly. "Something's wrong. I can see it Edward." He sighed. "I just want today to be over. After school I promise to be fine," he explained as he leaned in for a kiss. As his lips met mine it felt wrong. It felt needy like he was afraid that this wouldn't happen again.
As I pulled away I rested my hand on his cheek. "I love you…not matter what," I said feeling like he needed the reassurance. "I love you Bella, so much."
I made it through the first half of the day and was now on the way to lunch. I hoped Edward felt better.
I sat down at our table confused when I didn't see Edward there. I looked towards where the football team was and still didn't see him. "Have any of you seen Edward?" I asked Emmett, Rose, Alice and Jasper.
"Huh, no I haven't," Rose spoke up and looked around for him. I checked my phone for texts from him but came up empty. I waited through half of lunch before I stood up from the table and started to leave the room.
I heard someone jogging to catch up with me. "Bella, where are you going? I'm sure Edward is fine. He's probably in the gym or with a teacher or something," Rose told me as she walked next to me. "He hasn't even texted me, Rose. He doesn't do that. I just want to find him. Something isn't right. He's never done this," I said starting to get a little hysterical. I know I was probably overreacting but this is not normal of Edward.
Seeing that I was freaking out Rose grabbed my hand and started dragging me somewhere. "Where are we going?" I whined. "Janitors closet. I don't want you freaking out over nothing. We can talk there," she said quietly looking back at me concerned.
She opened the door and just stopped so I ran into her back. I heard gasps and shuffling. I should also mention I distinctly heard a male and female in there. "Bella," Rose said in a strange voice. "Get out of here. Meet me in the lunch room or bathroom or something."
"Rose, who is in there?" I demanded.
"Bella, just go. Please." She said as she turned around. When I met her eyes they were filled with tears.
"Rose," I sobbed out. "Who's in there?" I asked knowing the answer.
"Bella," I heard from the broken voice of the only person I didn't want to hear in this moment. Everything seemed to slow down. I watched as Rosalie put a hand over her mouth and let out a few sobs. I watched as Edward came up and stood next to Rose. I looked around them and saw Lauren adjusting her shirt with a smile on. I think he was talking but I couldn't hear anything. Though he did have tears in his eyes and I had no clue why.
"I…I can't," I managed to get out and spun around and headed towards the front doors of the school to leave. I wanted to be home where my mom would be waiting. She was coming home today and at the moment I just needed a mothers love.
My body wracked with sobs as I started walking. "Bella! Bella please," I could hear Edward but I couldn't turn around. I felt a tug against my arm and knew Edward had grabbed my wrist. "Let go," I whispered. I could barely speak, let alone speak to him.
"Bella please, let me explain. Just give me the opportunity to explain," he begged. He had turned me around and he was on his knees. "I don't really think there is anything to explain," I said turning back around trying to leave but he still had his hand wrapped around my wrist.
"Bells, please. Don't leave. Please just don't leave. Let me explain. Just don't do this," he was sobbing at this point. What he just said made me see red though. "Don't do this? I didn't do this Edward! This..." I said gesturing between the two of us, "is not due to something I did. You did this! You obviously made your choice so don't act like you don't want me to leave," I seethed at him all the while still crying.
I looked over to see that Alice, Rose, Emmett and Jasper were all looking at us completely shocked. Alice and Rose were blubbering messes, almost as bad as I was. I could also see Lauren standing separate from them with a smirk on her face.
"Bella, I love you. I'll do anything, just please let me explain," he looked up at me. "Anything?" I asked in a stained voice. "Yes, yes anything for you. I love you. I'll do anything."
"Let go," I said simply.
"What?" he asked confused.
I tugged on my wrist. "Let. Go." I could see the understanding flash across his face. It looked like it pained him to let go but I couldn't understand why. As soon as my wrist was free I turned around and left. From behind me I could hear Edward. "Emmett let me go! I need to get to her. Please." "Just because you're my brother doesn't mean I won't hesitate to beat the crap out of you. Let her go," he said menacingly. I ran out of the school and hopped in the car.
I drove home as fast as possible. When I pulled into the drive way I saw a strange car assuming it was the car my mom rented from the airport. My mom must have heard me pull up because by the time I was out of the car she was on the porch with a grin on her face.
When she saw me that smile instantly changed to worry. "Baby, what's wrong?" she asked me as I approached her. When I was right in front of her I completely lost it and collapsed on the porch. She followed me down and gathered me in her arms. She let me cry into her shoulder for who knows how long. Eventually she helped me get up and guided me into my bedroom. She laid me down, took off my shoes and then lay down next to me. That was the last thing I remembered as I cried myself into exhaustion.
When I woke up I could feel someone on either side of me but I didn't alert them to my consciousness. Out in the hallway I could hear my mother asking Emmett what happened today. "He…he broke her heart," I barely heard Emmett say. "My poor baby," my mother added.
Finally I opened my eyes and looked around to see Rose and Alice on either side of me with their heads against my shoulders. They must have dozed off but upon my movement they woke up and instantly looked at me.
"How are you?" Alice whispered. Tears came to my eyes as all of the emotions from earlier in the day came back to me. "Heartbroken," I croaked out.
The few days after that Tuesday were horrible. I couldn't eat and I would only sleep when I was exhausted from crying. Everyone seemed to be avoiding Edward, even Emmett and Jasper.
Esme came over yesterday and just held me while I cried. She reassured me of her love and how her son was the stupidest person in the entire world.
Currently I was curled up against Rose listening to the radio.
"What am I going to do Rose? I'm nothing without him," I confided in my sister.
"Bells come on. You know I would give up anything to go back and fix this for you but it's not as though you can't have a life without him. You're still you. Silly, wonderful Bella, my twin sister."
"I don't want to be the kind of girl that needs a man at her side to be happy. But it's not just any man, it's only Edward. Edward is the only one that will make me happy. He was literally the best part of me," I tried to explain to her.
"You were happy before you ever met him though."
"Yes but that was before I knew what utter bliss felt like. Before Edward came into my life I always felt out of step…like I was literally stumbling through my life. Everything was better though once we fell in love."
"Bella, I know you may not want to hear this but I talked to him today. I think that you should let him…" she began but I interrupted her. "Stop right there Rose. He chose this. I don't want to hear his reasoning or explanation. I will just hurt more."
"Bella," she tried again. "Please Rose…stop."
Don't hate me! I swear I have an explanation! I hope you liked it though? A little drama never hurt anyone :) Hopefully I will update in the next 2 or 3 days. Review!
