Beloved.

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Hearken to my voice, as you always have, as you always will.

What lies between us...is that which transcends thought, which defies logic, which circumvents entirely the depth of your fragile, fleeting emotions. You know the folly of the attempt. Of trying to articulate the sublime agony of your feelings, trying in vain to interpret the shuddering trepidations of your heart. Oh you know it dearest- know it truly, deeply- for what it is.

But yet again, you cast your eyes willingly to the darkness. Yet again, you will not hearken to the truth of my words. Yet again- you will not acknowledge the strength of these hands, which yearn to do nothing but embrace you. You comfort yourself in the depths of your being, armoring yourself with lies, with reason...when I am here. Yet again- you think of nothing but the dark of a night long ago, when I took you, and brought you close to me.

That beautiful, wondrous moment...it was then.

It was then that you glimpsed, for the briefest of moments, the depths of my being. And frightened- you refused to look again. Oh dearest- if you only knew how it pained me- to be thus abandoned, to be thus disregarded. Even though I understand you truly, fully. In all things you refuse to acknowledge that for us, for you...normalcy no longer exists. Think what you will, believe what you like. But you cannot disregard the dark of your thoughts, the black of your desires, once so clean and pure-

I know.

I know how you have wondered. How you have dreamed darkly in quiet agony, of all that I am. But truthfully, dearest- you needn't wonder, you needn't fret. I am here if you wish it. I am here if you would but speak. I am here. For you and you alone. Dearest- you know that in the black of my being, I long for nothing but the murmur of your breath as you part those succulent lips- and finally- say the words I have been waiting for, longing for. And yet you still hesitate. You still cower before me as if I am stranger, as if you have never longed for the heat of my touch, for the comforting warmth of my smile. As if I was never all that you had wanted, had needed, had hungered for.

Beloved- don't look at me like that- with those beautiful eyes like the moon, tight with fear. Beloved...you know that despite all things, beyond all things before I am the creature you fear, the being you loathe- I am the one that you love, have loved since your heart first beat to the sound of my voice. Oh Beloved-

-and yet how sweet I find the fear in your eyes, the tremble on your lips. Oh dearest...how I delight in the pale of your skin...how I long to trace, to caress the delicate lines of your silhouette with my hands, my lips...beloved...how wondrous you would taste...how beautiful you would be, breaking, falling too pieces, in my arms, screaming wordlessly, endlessly with the pleasure that only I could give you-

Oh Beloved- have I not said it enough? You know how I hunger endlessly, ceaselessly, for the sweet of your skin.

But not yet, not yet. But soon- soon...

But you need not fear. The scalding heat of my eyes, the dark depths of my being, the desire that is always there for you and you alone...despite all things...I am what I have always been, and will always be.

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Yours.

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The promise.

Solemnly murmured, always desired. 'Don't worry. Someday, somehow-' The sweet, gentle heat of his eyes, the warmth of his hand. The delicate sweetness of his lips. 'I will set you free.' She would never forget it. His voice...then it had been deep, infinite. 'I intend to finish what I started.'

-And no one could ever quite seem to recall when Naruto had made himself known to them. Her quiet inquiries after entering the Academy had resulted in confused murmurs, quirked brows and empty expressions. And they would say- 'Eh...Naruto..? Ah! You mean that one? Hmm...I'm not sure...'

She could see the empty wheels behind their blank eyed gazes, could feel as always, the goosebumps making themselves known on her skin- 'Didn't he enter the Academy with us? He is in our class-' 'Yes but weren't there a lot of odd rumors around him-? Or maybe not-?'

-the hairs rising on the back of her neck- 'Did he get held back?' 'No- hasn't he always been around-?' 'But isn't it odd, that he's here when he has no lineage of his own, no family?'

-and the reminder of his laughter, echoing through the marble halls. 'Maybe it's really not that strange-' 'Naruto does keep things interesting-' 'But- I'm not sure-' 'Sorry, I don't really know-'

And despite the rumors about his lack of lineage, he had never lacked for company. He kept equally rowdy, equally boisterous people near him. He was always around others who lived as wild and recklessly as he did. He preferred the rough, but good natured Kiba Inuzuka- the always slothful Shikamaru Nara...he joked fondly with both the fun loving Sakura and Ino- who both only seemed to seek his company because he had an odd friendship with the always reserved Sasuke Uchiha.

It seemed at once that he had many friends but at the same time, as if he had none. ['The way Kiba would shrug his shoulders when she had overcome her reservations to quietly ask him- 'Eh? You're asking about that bastard? Ha! How long have I known him eh? Who can fucking remember! You're asking the wrong one girlie. If you want to know the answer to that-'] But she was a coward. She already knew the answer. She already knew the truth. 'What...is it I was seeking? What is it I was asking for? I...I don't know...'

Shikamaru was impossible to find. He attended even less infrequently than Naruto did, pardoned somehow due to the staggering extent of his genius. Both Sakura and Ino would laugh off her inquiries, as if the very thought that she held him in any kind of regard, and was interested in him in any form was preposterous- ['You're really asking about Naruto? That knuckle head?! Come on now Hinata! Who would have thought the Hyuuga heiress would have such a sense of humor-' 'What is there to know about that failure? He barely pays attention, scrapes by on all of his exams- only the gods know why Sasuke tolerates that idiot-']

She did...not speak to Sasuke Uchiha much. It was hard to find him, to make her way through the crowd of people who always seemed to flock, innately to his side. He was not one for idle talk or chatter. They called him a genius, and he stood on the strength of his own merit. He was flawless in his execution, his perception of assignments and tasks. He was...different from her. He accepted the burden of his lineage with steely eyed grace. According to many this was accounted for perhaps, by a tragedy some time ago...where his entire family had been cruelly slain by the previous heir.

It had been a ghastly, horrific event, one whose memory still echoed throughout the far flung reaches of society. No one would dare speak on it aloud- but even amongst her clan the foul rumors still persisted- 'They say the eldest Uchiha went mad!' '-he spared none but the youngest heir-' and deeper, darker- '-the eldest was a genius, a prodigy- but he did have a score of peculiar talents, and always...an unusual interest in the study of demons-' -but they would not speak more of it, frightened at the thought that such rumors might be true...and she...dared not believe them, dared not even dream of it. Because she knew.

She understood truly- what such a thing would mean. She understood truly...the dark of his laughter then in ways she would never admit.

But in the same fearful, frightened way she refused to acknowledge the truth of herself, and her own vow...she refused to see it in others. Against herself she cast aside the horror of her thoughts, of her truth, buried them deep beneath her longing for that time long ago, when that wild haired boy had took her hand...

But Sasuke...was the only one who Naruto would seek in the white walled academy, the only one he would willingly find beside herself. And he- '[-had kept his expression placid, cold and closed off as it always was. He seemed to think little of her question, to think nothing of the suddenness with which she had asked him about his frequent companion and sometimes friend. He had cold black eyes, which always stared at everything around him as if he refused to acknowledge anything, not even himself. But he answered her honestly. 'If you want to know that you should ask him. I don't know any more than you do.'-]

And she...remembered when he had first made himself known to her, when he had first reached out a hand to her. Since then, her entire life it seemed, was one carousel of colors, of thoughts and feelings all formed around the warmth of his smile. It seemed as if he had always been there- watching, waiting- to grab her hand in his. It seemed like he would always be there- laughing, smiling, and living with such wild strength. But she hadn't allowed herself to forget.

She remembered that Neji...had found them after the vow.

Wild haired boy with the golden hair and dark haired treasure, shyly kissing beneath the big oak tree to seal the depth of their bond, their promise to one another. She would never forget the cold, icy fury that had raged behind his eyes when he had found them. She would never forget the way he had charged Naruto, had struck him, violently, powerfully, with all of the force he could find. The sound-! He had raised his fist again and again- and with all of the force he had- lowered them. She had screamed- not because of the absurdity, or the intensity of the violence- she had screamed because there it was again. The dark of Naruto's shadow, black as pitch on the ground beneath them. And she was the only one who knew.

And Naruto...had only laughed. The same wild laugh as always. But beneath that was something she had tried not to see, something she had willingly forgotten, the truth she refused to acknowledge.

Even though Neji did not know the truth- he had never seemed to forgot that moment. Even now she knew that memory was always prevalent in his mind, mocking him, taunting him with its implications, with the reality of the future wife who could not- would not- love him. She knew it had struck a bitter blow to his pride, to his very sense of self. That he, such a superior, powerful being- could not enrapture her with that cold superiority that had led all others to fall at his feet. To think that such a quiet, weak willed woman would not truly belong him to no matter what duty mandated. She could feel the weight of it every time he watched her with his icy pale gaze. He had told her father of her meetings with the wild boy with neither clan nor family to call his own- and that had been the beginning of the end for her first love.

After that year and its disastrous ending when they had parted, she had spent many years enduring private lessons and discipline at the direction of her father. Completely isolated from all others save the clan, in some hopes that such exile would inspire in her more complete understanding, more willingness to heed to their warnings, their instruction.

Truthfully she knew why her Father had acted so harshly- it was dangerous. Such a lofty dream, an ideal as foolish as freedom. Many times her father would oversee her learning, coldly reminding her again, and again, and again. 'You must serve your purpose. For the good of the clan. This is your duty. This is your birthright.'

And she...had not seen him again until she had been of age to formally attend the academy. She had been shocked, mystified- and despite all things, despite the distance of years and silence that had stretched between them, it was him in the flesh as he had always been in the sweetness of her memories. The too short boy of ten had grown. But he was still there as he promised- waiting for her.

She had been strongly cautioned not to seek him, not to speak with him, not to engage him under threat of severe punishment. She had been explicitly and tirelessly informed, strictly warned. With Neji being ever close by- and always, without fail he would find her alone, in passing, fleeting moments.

There was much that had not changed- the mischievous twinkle in his eyes, the tilt of his smile, the same odd markings on his cheeks when he stretched them in laughter. She had not been able to fight it. Much had not changed. It was the same old longing that would lead her gaze to rest fondly upon him as he lay sprawled out in slumber across his desk. The same way she would always be listening for the bright tone of his voice, his laughter. The same heat that would find her cheeks at the thought of him. The same familiar beat of her heart at his approach, his nearness, the sound of his voice. Without fail it was the same childlike, innocent, pure hearted love. She had not been able to shake it, to forget it, to cast it aside.

But-

She had understood as she had grown, as she had blossomed with understanding, with awareness with each passing year. As she had learned, had studied all there was to know about those strange powerful beings...demons. Year by year without him by her side, without the warmth of his hand- she had understood. This love...was foolish. This love...was wrong. This love...would end her. Because of the promise, because of the vow...'That which lies between us...I'm still the same coward I've always been. I'm...frightened. Of that vow, that promise...' But she had been reading the book. He had already told her. 'You can no longer be redeemed. You can no longer be saved. Beyond all that is precious, beyond all that is sacred-

He was still waiting for her answer.

All this time he had been waiting, watching, patiently biding away his days until the time when she would hearken to him. He had not come for her, had not truly sought her. There had been passing words, taunts, gestures. His laughing eyes would follow her as hers followed his. He would walk through her shadow just to watch her squirm. He would be waiting for her, always with a ready smile, an easy laugh. But he had not...come for her.

Because for him...that simply wouldn't do. It had to be her. She had to seek him willingly, of her own will. He knew that out of the fragile weakness of her heart, out of the depth of her love, out of the weakness of her spirit and resolve- once more- she would hearken to his voice.

She had never once thought her father, Neji- had known- that they suspected the reality of the nature of their relationship, but his words brought full circle the horror that maybe...they did.

What if her father had always known it? Had he always felt it just like she did? 'No- I won't believe it. I cannot! If he knew- if he truly knew the horror of what I have done- he would not allow me before him. He would cast me aside, would leave me bitterly to my fate. He would exile me from the clan. This is Naruto-kun who has said this-' -maybe his words meant nothing.' Or they may mean everything' -she knows how mocking his smiles could be- 'My father cannot possibly know-' -but those blue eyes could see through everything and everyone. 'But if he knows...oh Mother-' The thought was too terrible to finish, to complete, not even in her mind.

-because before him, not even her thoughts were sacred.

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He was still standing before her, laughing.

Despite all things he taunted her, mystified her, laughed with her as if he cared not for the secret she tried so hard to hide. As if he did not know of the truth she tried to bury in the pit of her being. She had not been able to understand then in her youth, to fully realize its horror then. But now- in this moment, it was there again, right in front of her eyes.

She feels sick, pale, haggard with the reality of it, finally placed before her.

"Hey Hina-chan." He comes back to himself suddenly, his voice cheerful, mischievous again. The bright light of his eyes is glowing painfully, wonderfully beautiful in the gloom of morning. She is acutely aware of her own pounding heart, sinking into the pit of her chest. She wonders at the sound of her blood, roaring in her ears. She feels stripped of thought, robbed of feeling- but she can feel it coming, feel the terrible finality of reality coming to take her away. She can feel it coming, like a foul black tide, threatening to overwhelm her. What he wants- is you. 'But you always knew that didn't you? Haven't you read those words for yourself? Deny it all you want, ignore it like the coward you are- but you knew-'

"It was here wasn't it? That we met?" he added suddenly, his eyes bright and twinkling. He said it nonchalantly, as if he did not know of it, as if it were a passing, fleeting memory. She knew that his kind did not forget. It was the same old Naruto-kun as always, the one she had always known, making light of everything.

"Don't you remember that night?" Coaxing, laughing at the memory. He smiles. But again there is something in it that startles her. She realizes in this moment that she understands him in his entirety- that his face is as clear and unforgettable to her as her own. And she remembers her mother's words again.

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[Don't cry love, don't cry. Haven't I told you? If you're ever sad, if you're ever lonely-]

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[-come here and speak. And maybe, just maybe...one day...]

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[-your angel will answer you-]

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The forest in the dark of her memory is a foreboding, all encompassing stretch of darkness, towering far overhead into starless night. She runs it seems, through a never ending stretch of overgrown trail, her eyes blinded with tears. Where she is going- she doesn't know.

She wanders as if in a dream- stumbling pathetically over the dark underbrush, tumbling harshly to her knees. She lies there sprawled across the forest floor- feeling the hot tight warmth of the tears she wants to shed knotted deep in her heart. She rolls over onto her back, sightlessly surveys the dark of the sky overhead. She reaches her hands upwards, noting how small, how insignificant they are in comparison. They are small, pathetic things. They are incapable of everything, had failed her time and time again. These hands...had not even been strong enough to hold tightly to the hands of the person she had loved most in the world.

She was the one who had let her slip away into nothing- she was the one who had been incapable of saving her. In the end, she had been everything her father had always told her. Worthless. Weak. And that is when the tears come.

She chokes back a sob- fights it- covering her face with her arms to scream wordlessly against her skin. It was no use- she was too young to realize the truth of the world in which she had found herself- but she could feel the weight of it. She could hear the words of her father. Curt, cold, and heavy with disappointment.

She was inconsolable, still overcome with a sorrow so potent, so tangible that it seemed to rest heavy over her entire being. She could still remember with wordless horror the moment when she had entered her mother's chamber. She had found her Father there for the first time in the entirety of her existence. But that wasn't what stopped her. It is the pale, peaceful form of her mother lying in her bed, eyes closed as if in slumber. Even in death she was a beauty- a delicate, wondrous creature- but her father's gaze is hard, bitter as it rests on her form.

'And this...is the price of such foolishness, such weakness...I wish to see her no longer. Do away with her.'

He states curtly, and the servants cover her form in a blanket of white. He turns and finds her then. She is silent, incapable of words- but there are the tears, bitter and warm in her eyes. She trembles at the doorway, cowering from the reality of the moment she can feel but cannot understand. But he reaches to neither console nor comfort her.

'Just like her mother. This one- I can do nothing with her. As expected...she is no use. She is-'

-But she can't finish it. She dares not. Now more than any other day of her fleeting existence- she feels the weight of the bitter look of contempt in his eyes. There are the precious, faded memories of the woman who had given birth to her... she was still haunted by the sweet of her scent and the calming sound of her voice. But to her clan...she was a burden, a reminder of her mothers weakness. She feels as if she is more shadow than girl. As if to them she is barely worth noting. As if she should not, could not exist.

She had no one...and she had run to the only comfort, the only solace she had ever known aside from the comforting warmth of her mother's presence. The meadow- was filled with that sweet smelling memory, and the haunting reminder of her mother's words. But at this she could no longer fight it-against herself she sobbed loudly, recklessly into the palms of her hands. She feels it again, more pronounced than before- the true weight of her clan, bearing down fully upon her. And she is to weak to fight it, but understood with a child's understanding that she never would. And-

'-Whhhhhy are you cryiiiing-?'

-a voice speaks to her.

She pauses at this, stunned into wordless silence. It is as if it is coming from everywhere around her- and then, as if it is echoing in the very pit of her being. Abruptly, startled, she sits up, hurriedly wiping her tears and blinking to clear her vision. She staggers shakily to her feet in embarrassment- had her father not told her to never show such a shameful act to others? Had he not warned her that punishment would be swift and merciless for such weakness? But no matter how she anxiously scoured the darkness- she finds no one at the end of her gaze. 'Where? Who?' She sucks in a shallow breath, turns on her heel to survey the enclosed clearing but still...there is no one there-

But again, quietly from the formless darkness, she hears- 'Whhhhhhy...are yooooou crying?' The voice is curious, coaxing, gentle- but...odd- 'Is it...the voice of...a man? A...woman?' Or...more? She cannot distinguish the toneless murmur of the words- but against herself- against all of the training that had been so forcefully ground into her, against all of the times she has been told, cautioned, and warned...after all the hours of meditation spent strengthening her mind, her resolve- it all seems to leave her.

Her father's warning. Neji's scolding. Her tutor, chiding her once more. Only her mother's words are there, echoing in her head. [If you're ever sad, if you're ever lonely...]-Against all of these things- she answers.

"- B-Because…I...I am a-alone." She admits, chokes on the truth of the words, feels them as surely as if she has always known it. Already...resigned to this fate. "N-Now...t-there is no o-one...there is no one h-here for me." She answers honestly, fighting back cold tears.

The voice- seems to echo, to sigh, to murmur in a thousand hushed whispers around her. As if in that one moment, there is many lowly murmured voices, all fighting to be heard, to be chosen. And then out of the swarm of murmurs- there is one- clearer, stronger than all the others. It grows in volume, becoming clearer, and it seems as if the other voices fade away into nothing immediately before it, while this one grows stronger, louder- 'Oh? Is that all?' It states curiously, darkly- and then before she can grasp it- it changes. It becomes a bright, merry voice, speaking as if with a smile- '-But that is not true. After all-' -there is a peal of bright, childlike laughter that makes her shudder. 'I am here.'

"Y-You?" She questioned softly, hesitantly. Her eyes are cast around the darkened gloom, as she turns on her heel again, surveying the night and the dark dim of the forest around her. But...there is no one there. There is nothing but herself, and the dark far flung shadows of the trees encircling the meadow. "A-And w-who…W-Who a-are you?" But this time she is rewarded with silence- there is no response, no answer. She casts her eyes around, curiously, wordlessly- but there is nothing. Is she dreaming? Is this real? But she turns- and finds him.

The boy suddenly standing before her startles her with his nearness, so that she gasps, stumbling backwards, away from him. His small stature mirrors her own- but his wild hair is bright and gold, a beacon in the shadowy dark. He smiles a pleasing, toothy grin. He has large, bright blue eyes, skin bronzed by a midday sun. She gasps anew at the sight of his eyes as if they have robbed her of breath, cowers shyly for a moment away from the startling clarity of them, and the intensity with which they stare without fear into her eyes. In the dark she could swear he glowed- the night wind around him feels hazy, warm...but his form- seems to waver- like a mirage, like a far off vision...but maybe...she is imagining it?

"W-Who…w-who are you?" She mumbles out quietly in shock, not understanding in this moment fully the reality of what she has done- but he only smiles.

He knows.

"See? Didn't I tell you? You're not alone." His eyes are warm, inviting. His smile is soft, gentle. It surprises her, one unused to either attention or affection, startled by the warmth she finds in the depths of bright blue eyes.

"I'm here. And I've been waiting for you." He states clearly, in a voice unlike any she has ever heard. It is startling in its strength, its confidence. It is filled with something she does not have, has never had- resolve. Everything he says, he says as if it is absolute truth. It is overwhelming, all encompassing- the brash, unforgiving strength of his being that she can feel, as if it is coming from his form in waves. She believes him in this moment. She believes completely that he has been waiting for her and her alone.

"And I'm your friend aren't I?" He murmurs cheerfully, the words said easily, his smile blindingly bright. She stares at him in wide eyed fascination and wordless awe. His whole face brightened with the force of his grin, as if he were lit from within. In this moment he seems to her a dazzling, otherworldly creature, one far removed from the cold blandness of her own existence. In this moment- she is star struck, surprised that such a bright, powerful being- was talking to her with such fondness.

"M-My…f-friend?" She states with some difficulty, her brow crinkled with confusion and disbelief, still trying to place, to understand the odd boy and his connection to her. She knew even in her youth that she was not worth much, that her value has already been measured and marked as insufficient. But the boy before her is blinding, dazzling with promise. It seems to her that already she is unworthy, that already she had done him some disservice by keeping herself in his company. But for the first time...she feels as if she is finally, truly being seen. To others she was a frail slip of nothing, an odd child easily overlooked, easily forgotten.

But in this moment, for the first time- she feels as if he sees her, as if he knows her...But she has no answer. She is too young to understand, to fully articulate the depths of these complicated feelings. What it is she needs to ask, what it is she needs to say- she is too young to realize the truth of this moment.

But he does.

"Yes. Your friend." He states fondly. "I came here just for you." And slowly he reaches for her hand, and takes it in his own. He grabs her hand easily, so gently it is as if has always done it, as if he always will. Their hands fit together with such completeness that she does not hesitate to grasp it back. She does not think. It is the most sublime, otherworldly feeling she has ever known- that single moment when his hand grasped hers. It was as if before he touched her he had been merely a shadow, a hauntingly bright visage, a dream she had been dreaming all of her life. But the moment he touched her hand- she felt the reality of his warmth, his touch, solidifying in her own. It was in that moment- for her- that he became real.

"A-Ano...m-my n-name is...H-Hinata." She states quietly as she surveys him, compelled, bewitched, transfixed, by the storm brewing in blue eyes.

"Oh! I know." He states with another wide, blinding smile. "And what is mine?" He asks her carefully, gently. Again she is transfixed, in awe of the swirling storm in his eyes. "Y-Your...n-name?" She asks him quietly, confused by the question he has placed before her. "Well yeah!" He states with another bright smile. "I do need one don't I?" He adds with a laugh.

"So tell me Hina-chan- what is my name?" He asks her again, gently, more coaxing than before. She does not think to wonder at the oddness of his inquiry. She does not think to wonder why he has no name of his own. She does not think to wonder why he asks her- she thinks of none of those things. Suddenly it comes to her in this moment, makes its way to the forefront of her mind, as if it has always been there. His name. As easily as if she had said it a thousand times before.

"Y-You...Y-you a-are...Naruto." She states quietly, suddenly. His gaze grows thoughtful at this, curious- he purses his lips, scrunching his brow in thought- before abruptly he smiles again, humming pleasingly beneath his breath. "Hmm? I like that! I really like it!" His voice is boisterous, joyous with pleasure. Against herself, she feels the heat rise to her cheeks, somehow happy that he is pleased. But even so, not even once does she stop to think-

"It's a good name isn't it?" He added, and she could only nod dumbly, hurriedly in reply. It fits him, somehow- the wild mane of gold, the rough warmth of his hand- the bright light in his eyes and the odd marks on his cheeks. But he smiles, throwing to the night wind all thought from her mind, dispelling all of her concerns, all of her childish fears with absolute ease. He squeezed her hand in his own. His grip is warm- comforting in its strength.

"Well come on Hina-chan! Let's go play."

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And she- had followed him then.

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And in many ways...she had been following him ever since.

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[Oh Mother...can you hear me?]

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[I did as you bid of me. I went. And...I...spoke.]

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[But oh Mother...I...I didn't know it then.]

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[That what I would find...was no angel.]

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[It was-]

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The callous strength of his smile.

"My cute little Hina-chan- you were such a darling then weren't you? Poor girl who didn't have anyone in the world to call friend. You didn't know.. you couldn't have known then- but you know now don't you? Hopefully all of those long winded windbags at the Academy have been good for something eh? What of them? All of those lessons? Those private tutors? Haha! Really makes me wonder! How many times has your father told you this one before?" He pauses suddenly in the midst of his cheerful words, abruptly making his face stern, solemn as he opens his mouth and says-

"-You must steel your heart. You must strengthen your resolve. So that we will not fall prey to the same weaknesses, so that we will not succumb to that far reaching darkness that lingers at the edge of the world between our realm and- them."- it is the voice of her father. Curt. Cold. Filled with that same callous disinterest, that same icy distance. As if there were an entire world between them.

In this moment she is standing before him- acutely aware of the blood coursing through her veins, the goosebumps, the heat running down her spine. And there is the same familiar sickness, the same weakness, the same unexplainable longing. He knows. As he always does, as he always will. She feels fully the agony of her torment. She is sick with horror, with fascination, with the realization once more that this between them is-

"It's almost funny...don't you think Hina-chan?" His smile is mocking, taunting now. Cold with power, the understanding of a being who saw the world before him as nothing more than a passing amusement. She doesn't think he means to show so much of himself so soon, but it was one of the faults that he had taken from her. He was always a little too eager now, a little too excited, a little too brash-

"They really think they know so much about everything don't they? All of those stupid reports! Texts! Rumors!" She had never considered the absurdity of it until this moment, never considered the reality of how it must have been for him, how laughingly pathetic it all must seem to him- but he seems to enjoy it, his own taunting words.

"In their cute little white walled Academy- teaching their cute little lessons. They really, honestly, and truly believe that they understand anything at all! When they couldn't even begin to imagine! Oh Hina-chan." He turns to her again, petulantly, pouting as if she were trusted confidant, as if she were the only one who could understand him, could understand this.

"In the end...they don't know much at all do they? Don't you think it's funny Hina-chan?" She stares sightlessly, wordlessly into those laughing blue eyes, the ones she had dreamed of all of her life, and had always adored.

"-Here I am! In plain sight. And the only one who knows...is one who will not speak." His voice grows gentle, fond, sweet again- as he cast that same far flung gaze over her. It is one of the few he has reserved for her and her alone. Back then- she had not understood it. And even now, after all of this time, she still does not. Is it pity? Is it sorrow? Is it understanding? Is it...love? She cannot decipher it, cannot fully grasp nor answer the question always there on the edge of his gaze. But his gaze is soft, haggard, almost pained when it finds hers.

But the truth is it is something far more frightening, something deeper, darker than all others. Something she dares not think of, dares not acknowledge even when he had already told her once. It is something far more complicated- or maybe far more simple. It is Desire-

"...And if she spoke who would hear her? Who would hearken to her voice? In the end...she knows that I am the only one who is listening. She knows that I...am the only one who will answer. The only one that can comfort her. But ah...she..."

His gaze delicately, fondly, traces the outline of her form, with a heat that she cannot match, refusing in this moment to acknowledge it. His expression is curious. It is open, pained in a way she could not understand. There is a look of sweet, bitter agony etched into the lines of it. In this moment he truly seems to be all that he claims to be- that the sweetness of the words written in the book had promised her. His rugged cheeks are flushed, warm, his blue eyes tormented. "N-N-Naruto-kun..." She stammers out, cut to the core by the pained expression on his face. She feels her own face flush, burn with something far too potent to be shame. 'Again- the truth is-' "S-Stop it- y-y-you k-know t-that y-you c-can't mean t-that. Y-You d-don't-" She cannot finish it, cannot finish the bitter thought- abruptly- she wants to cry again, to scream again. "Y-Y-You are t-trying to c-confuse m-me...a-again- y-you are j-just t-telling me what I w-want to h-hear. T-Those w-words are n-not y-yours- they a-are-"

But he stops her, with a drop of his head. And with a breathless, quiet murmur that makes her heart pound- "Oh Hina-chan...you still...think that huh? Didn't I tell you? You are the only thing I want. If I could be for even a moment the one you had longed for, had waited for...if I could truly...just be the boy you loved so deeply, and the boy who loved you...for you my cute little Hina-chan, for you- the most precious thing in this world- for you I was willing to be whatever you wanted. For you- I didn't mind pretending. If it was for you-"

-It is with unabashed adoration with which he lovingly traces the outline of her delicate pink lips. He licks his own as he if he wants to taste them. He takes her in, breathes deeply- as if he is basking in the sweetness of her scent. His eyelids droop heavily, lazily, over his darkened eyes- it is a hot, hooded, sensuous gaze. It is gaze that she knows can make her blood sing, makes her feel as if her skin is warming, heating beneath it. For a moment- he just watches her- watches with the same unspoken longing the way the dim light of morning caught in the dark of her hair, brightened the pale pallor of her skin. He watches her. If she were to be honest with herself- the need she knows is there- frightens her. She feels her face flame as she looked away from his eyes- but she can feel the force of them still-'N-No- y-you c-can't b-believe t-this. Y-You can't trust this- the truth- the truth is-' She stammers out the words before all courage, all heart left her- but even so- always- they are too late.

"N-Naruto-kun... I-I t-told you- I-I'm s-sorry! I-I know...t-that I was the one w-who c-called you h-here- t-that I-I was the one w-who g-gave you f-form. But N-Naruto- I s-still...I s-still c-can't answer you!"

She stands there, weak, weary from the force of the words, the pained tormented expression on her face mirroring his own. She watches him anxiously, fearfully- but it's too late. He lowers his head, and golden bangs hides his eyes from her-

-and He smiles.

The air is shifting again. She feels as if her entire form has been cast in shadow, as if she is drowning again- but this time she is wide awake, watching him fearfully with every passing moment. Moment by moment- she feels her blood chill, the very deep, dark essence of her spirit shuddering with revulsion at his closeness. She can feel him. Just below the surface, just below the edge of that smile, skirting on the edge of blue eyes- is him. As if he is always there, on the edge of her vision, a shadow just out of reach. She fights back the cold edge of panic, of horror threatening to make itself known in her wide eyed gaze- but she can feel her blood chill, as if her blood has turned to ice- feels the goosebumps, the same odd heat, the same odd tremble.

'T-This...this is not Naruto-' She thinks with the same sickening fear as always.

Not 'Naruto'- the boy she knows, had known, and is still struggling to understand.

Not 'Naruto'- the sweet faced boy from her memory, the boy of the mischievous smile.

Not 'Naruto'- the boy who goaded her with his taunts, with his laughter.

Not 'Naruto' - the one she had named.

And above all- not the boy who could gently, easily, take her hand. But that was where she had blurred the line. That was where she would forget, where she would lie to herself, time and time again. She would tell herself that they were not the same, that they could not be the same- because she did not want to think of it, to face it. That the truth is-

She knows he is 'Naruto' for her sake and no one else's. He is 'Naruto' for her and her alone. Because they both know that she is not strong enough to handle the truth. That had long gone without saying- but as always he has changed his mind again, in that same reckless way as before. She can see it again- how the blue of his eyes bleeds red. How his gaze, deepens, darkens-

"Oh Beloved...despite everything...you refuse to see me, refuse to acknowledge me. I am...what I am. For you. And haven't I told you? It's already too late. They...tried to warn you. They tried to caution you. They tried to stop you. But in any form, I am here. And I...am yours." She can't breathe. She can't breathe. She is sick with horror, remembering once more her weakness, her failings. It is his voice. No longer the lilting, jaunty, joyous voice of the boy she has loved, and still does. This voice is from the blackest of pits. This voice is meant for darkness, for agony, for torment. This voice was meant for things far beyond the scope of her imagination, her understanding. This voice- is sinful.She shudders, trembles at the barely concealed threat of it. The threat and the promise. 'Oh Mother-' He speaks as if he wants to devour her whole, as if there is nothing sweeter, nothing more beautiful than the look of absolute horror on her face as he takes one languid step towards her. "Too late! Too late!" Through a bitter smile laced with fang. This is Naruto no longer. This is the reality of her deepest, darkest fears, standing before her, drawing near to her with the blazing heat of his skin-

"Your first mistake- was answering me." He stated as he circles her slowly, dangerous slowly, taunting her with the overwhelming heat that wafted from his form, as if the very air around him burned. There is a scent- like sulfur, like ashes, like flame. Her blood is ice cold- but she can feel the sweat beginning to form on her skin, matting her bangs to her forehead, curling the small damp tendrils at the base of her neck as he skirted through her shadow.

"Your second- was giving me a name, giving me a form. Giving me an anchor to this world." The markings on his cheeks deepening, darkening, jagged like old wounds. She feels as if every ounce of her body is a tremble, is ablaze- 'Mother-' She wants to cry again but cannot, wants to scream again but cannot, wants to run again but cannot- even though she can feel him-

"And your third- Well you know that one now eh?" She swallows harshly, the cold lump of fear lodged in her throat. Back then- she had never checked his shadow. But he lets her see it now, in the dim rays of morning as he stops before her, revealing the tall, proud lines of his back. He finally, truly- let's her see. Her eyes lowers hesitantly, with a quiet dread, a potent and intangible horror, to the ground beneath her feet.

And there it is -coming to life beneath her- the shadow of a man- shifting, morphing- revealing fully the massive, towering pitch black form she has always feared. It covers the entire meadow in darkness, blacker than the space between the stars. She feels as if she is standing, stranded in a sea of shadows.

It is a black beast made of nightmare, of something so foul and unspeakable that she can neither give it place nor name. It is the shadow of a creature she could have only imagined in a fantastically horrific dream- a creature made from pure darkness- stunningly beautiful almost, in the extent of its abomination. One moment it appears almost wolflike. In another, there is the whirling, serpent like shadows of tails, being cast wildly against the walls of the forest- and there is the open, wickedly fanged, grinning maw of the beast as it smiles-

"Oh Hina-chan...I have had many names." He admitted truthfully to her. The weight of the words hangs there, darkly, between them. She cowers before him in this moment, frightened of all that had still gone unsaid. "But yours…" -sharp blue eyes flash in the dark of the morning. He smiles.

"None has ever been as precious to me as yours."


AN: A little more of the story unfolds...

I am very excited about where this is going, and can't wait to unveil more in the next few chapters. Hope you all are enjoying the journey as well. Again if anyone knows a good beta reader, it would be greatly appreciated as I can tend to be unnecessarily long winded. And I enjoy hyphens far more than I should, bugs my english prof to no end haha. Also thanks so much for all of the follows, favs and reviews! please don't hesitate to send tell me what you think, I enjoy reading you guys thoughts. See you all next week.