AN: After 84 years here is the final chapter! Forewarning it's the longest part which is why it took forever. You might even want to re-read the last chapter...i know i needed to. Anyways towards the end I didn't get to triple check for errors so feel free to point them out. And the rating did go up for this chapter but it's really only for one scene. I hope this chapter was worth the wait and I would love to hear your feedback!


"While I was sleeping!" Raven exclaims almost knocking over her drink. "Now that's just cruel. I had to watch you make heart eyes at her all night and you don't even have the decency to kiss her while I'm awake and can tease you about it."

"The way I hear it Lexa kissed her. So I think we get to tease Clarke anyways. We told you, you had nothing to worry about," Octavia says smacking Clarke on the shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Clarke waves Octavia off, "oh but Raven that means you owe me five bucks," she punches the buttons on her controller franticly but her person on the screen dies by zombies anyways.

"What?"

"You bet me 5 dollars I'd kiss her first."

"That was a mistake," Octavia says reviving Clarke's character.

"Hey, Clarke can be pretty forward."

"I'll give you that. Except when she needs to be forward she acts like she's never been with a girl before."

"Okay, true."

"I'm right here," Clarke scowls, character on the screen dying once again.

"So, you going to ask her out?" Raven asks watching the tv screen.

"Uh, I don't know."

"You should. This is what you've been waiting for right? A sign that you can go for it. I say go for it."

"I suppose."

"You better, or we're going to do it for you," Raven says taking the controller from Clarke.

"Fine." Arguing with them was pointless. And really she had no reason to worry. Lexa would say yes. Right?


"You moved again," Clarke says looking up from the sketchbook on her easel.

"Sorry," Lexa replies making a few more marks on her painting. Then returns her body back into the correct position.

"Thank you," once Lexa is standing still Clarke raises her charcoal pencil up to take a few measurements, "I swear I'm almost done. Then you can paint freely."

"No rush," Lexa answers. As stiffly as she can manage she sets her brush down. "I'm basically done anyways."

"Mkay," Clarke mutters. Working on the paper in front of her fiercely. Charcoal stick now in between her fingers, Clarke was working on pressing more darks into the paper. After a few minutes of scraping she's relatively satisfied. Eyeing Lexa's face Clarke forgets for a moment that she's drawing. "Hey Lexa?"

"Hm?" Lexa looks at Clarke from the corner of her eyes.

"We should go out on a date."

Lexa turns to fully face Clarke, eyes wide. Clarke maintains their eye contact. Waiting for Lexa to respond. Searching Clarke's face, Lexa's fingers begin to play with the end of her shirt. Looking away first Lexa asks, "You have anything in mind."

"My first thought was the movies, but we've kinda already done that. So maybe just dinner somewhere off campus," Clarke looks at Lexa a little longer, this time studying her nose before returning to the paper.

"There's a nice Indian restaurant Anya and I like to eat at sometimes."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. It's only like 10 minutes away from campus."

"Sounds perfect. What are you doing Friday?" Clarke can't keep the grin off of her face.


The taste of curry on Lexa's lips was kind of a turn on. Pushed up against Lexa's car Clarke makes a mental note to tease Lexa more often. Not only is it fun. But Lexa can be surprisingly impatient. They barely got out of the restaurant before Lexa's lips were on her skin. Opening her mouth she let's Lexa suck on her bottom lip. Hands moving to Lexa's butt, she grabs it, bringing their hips together. A small moan escapes from Lexa. Her hands come to Clarke's face. Pulling her closer while kissing her gently. With a final quick kiss she groans as she begins to separate from Clarke. "We should probably head back now."

"Or we could kiss some more," Clarke grins. She puts her hands in Lexa's back pockets. Trapping the brunette against her body. "We can kiss more later," it sounded like Lexa was trying to convince herself more than Clarke. Eyes focused on Clarke's lips, thumbs gently rubbing Clarke's cheeks. "Want to stay over at my room? I'm pretty sure Octavia is going to be out with Lincoln."

"Or you could come to my place," Lexa replies licking her bottom lip nervously.

"Really?"

Lexa nods.

"Okay. Take me to your house," Clarke grins, quickly moving to get in the car.

Pulling up into the driveway the first thing Clarke notices is the amount of cars. "How many people live in your house?"

"Officially there's five of us," Lexa puts the car in park, "But there are usually other people over." With the engine shutting off Lexa practically sprints out of the car in order to open Clarke's door for her. Clarke isn't even out of her seatbelt when her door is swung open. Trying to contain her laughter, Clarke giggles, "Thank you." Lexa only nods. Clarke doesn't miss the glow of pink on her cheeks. Following Lexa to the garage Clarke appraises the house. It seems like a decent size, judging from the outside. Maybe she'll have to look into getting a house next year instead of an apartment. As the garage door opens fully Clarke can't help but snort, "You guys have beer pong at the ready?" Gesturing towards the table with red Solo cups laid out in a triangle at both ends.

"Echo's doing," Lexa says with a shake of her head. Opening the door to the house she lets Clarke enter first. Pressing the switch to close the garage door. As soon as Clarke enters the kitchen she can hear a tv and multiple female voices shouting. The nudge of fingers at her back pushes her forward again. "Don't worry they're better than they sound right now," Lexa smiles. Walking passed Clarke's still hesitating form Lexa is the first to walk into the living room. "Who's losing?" she asks the group of three. With smug pride in her dark eyes Indra states, "Who do you think?"

"They're bullshit refs! That was so a face grab. Tell your fucking team to learn how to play the game," arms crossed Anya continues to glare at Indra.

"I could say the same to you. The point of the game is to make touchdowns not turnovers."

"Fuck off."

"Who's this, Lexa?" The dirty blonde sitting closest to Clarke brings all eyes to the fidgeting blonde.

"I forgot you were going out on a date," Anya says grinning.

"A date?" A dark eyebrow lifts in Indra's surprise.

"This is Clarke," Lexa ignores both Anya and Indra's comments, "Clarke you might remember Anya. These are two of my other housemates, Indra and Echo."

"Hi," Clarke replies attempting to keep her voice steady. Three pairs of eyes were studying her. None of the three offering any greetings besides Anya's nod of acknowledgement. "She's the cute painting one right?"

"Echo!" Lexa growls, shooting Clarke a glance.

"Just making sure," she holds her hands up in surrender but the grin on her face contradicts her apologizing tone.

"We'll be in my room," Lexa grabs a smiling Clarke's hand pulling her towards the stairs.

"Don't think because we're watching the game you two can be loud up there. I would prefer not to hear you, so at least try to be quiet Lexa."

"Anya! Please!" Lexa practically squeaks face turning crimson. Dragging Clarke up the stairs three barks of laughter follow rushed footsteps.

"I'm sorry about them," Lexa says once her door is safely shut.

"No worries. At least I know I'm not the only one with embarrassing friends. I feel like that was worse for you than me," Clarke walks around Lexa's room. It was fairly big. Bigger than Clarke's dorm room, for sure. It was also incredibly neat. Not one article of clothing left on the floor. Looking around Clarke feels like she needs to clean her room more next time Lexa comes over. "I'll kill them later," Lexa states putting her shoes away in her closet.

"As long as I'm not an accomplice," Clarke grins. Walking over to Lexa she takes her hands into her own before leading them over to Lexa's bed. Grin growing on her face she asks, "So…about that kissing more later?"

"Really Clarke?" Lexa laughs. The blonde's answer is to pull Lexa down by her arms, grinning into the start of many kisses.


An alarm that is not her own, startles Clarke awake. Quickly sitting up her eyes blur as she searches for her phone. Hearing a disgruntled groan that is not from Clarke's own vocal chords brings a grin to her lips. Instantly remembering where she was. She got to sleep next to the adorable brunette who was currently reaching out blindly for the offending mobile device. Laying back down Clarke inches her way closer to Lexa, who after finally hitting snooze let her head drop back to the pillows. Kissing Lexa on the cheek she asks, "When is your first class?" Eyes popping open, it takes a moment for Lexa to remember why someone else was in her bed. But when her sleepy brain connects the dots a smile is on her face, even as she answers, "8:30."

"Oh no. I'm sorry."

"No it's okay. I actually like early classes," sitting up, a hand runs through dark hair.

"Weirdo."

"I get to end my day early."

"Yeah, but's its 7 am right now. The time for sleep." As emphasis Clarke snuggles back down into Lexa's bed. Laughing Lexa gets up saying, "Maybe for you."

"And you?" Clarke tries to keep her face innocent as she lifts the covers from the spot Lexa vacated. Silently asking her to lie back down. "I wish, but I have to take a shower," Lexa smiles not missing Clarke's pout. Watching Lexa move about the room gathering her clothes for the day Clarke sighs out a, "Fine."

"When is your first class," Lexa chuckles standing by her door.

"Ten."

"That's not bad."

"Nope."

Lexa nods awkwardly for a moment before saying, "I'm going to take my shower now. I'll be right back."

"Mkay," Clarke mutters burying her head in Lexa's pillows. Sighing Clarke was content being wrapped around Lexa's scent. It didn't take her long to drift off.

"Lexa can you give me a ride to—oh shit—you're still here? I figured when I didn't hear moaning last night she took you home." Turning in the bed Clarke could only lay there wide eyed. Brain foggy from her return from sleep. No comeback was making itself available.

"We don't all bring people home just to sleep with them, Anya," Lexa's voice carries from outside the door.

"I don't know why not. Hey can you drop me off at work on your way to class?"

"Sure," hand brushing back damp locks of hair Lexa walks over to her dresser. The room is silent as she brushes her hair back. As she ties her hair up into a messy bun, barely looking at Anya she asks, "Did you need something else?"

Anya gives Clarke a good stare before answering, "Nope," and then walks out of the room.

"Is she always this…curious…about if you had sex," Clarke murmurs finally deciding that she needs to get out of Lexa's insanely comfy bed.

"I may have learned that her and Echo have a bet going on."

"A bet?"

"Yeah, apparently they've bet on how long it's going to take us to sleep together," Lexa attempted to hide her blush by pretending to rummage around her room for her notebooks (they were in her backpack, where they're supposed to be).

"Oh," Clarke looks around the floor for her shoes, "So what? Did she bet that we were actually going to do it last night?"

"Anya gives us a week. Echo says a month. And Indra doesn't care," Lexa replies turning her head briefly towards Clarke but looks away quickly. Chuckling Clarke eases her way behind a fidgeting Lexa. Snaking her arms around her waist Clarke asks, "And you?" Heat swims up from the spot Clarke's arms are in contact with Lexa's body, all the way up to Lexa's cheeks. "Excuse me?" She squeaks out.

"How long do you think it'll take us?" Clarke nuzzles the crook of Lexa's blushing neck.

"What? I…we…"

"Haha, relax. I'm just teasing you," Clarke kisses Lexa's crimson cheek, "Hey, do you think you could drop me off too?"

"I should tell you no," Lexa grumbles while letting Clarke take her hand. Grabbing her backpack she's lead out of her room by the blonde. "You aren't mean enough to make me walk back when I don't even know where I am, are you?"

"I guess not," Lexa replies trying to ignore Clarke's massive grin.

"Good. Because that would be terrible."


"Did you work on your painting this weekend?" Lexa asks. Clarke pulls a headphone away from her ear, unable to contain her grin. "Yeah. I started on this layer up here. With the thicker paint. And now I'm working on down here," her hands gesture to the stated areas.

"It's looking good. It's getting darker, figuratively and literally. But it fits."

"Yeah," Clarke stares at the painting for a few seconds before looking around the studio for Dante. He was talking to another student on the other side of the room. "How's yours? Miss I want to be ahead of everyone and start my next painting."

"There's nothing wrong with trying to do my best."

"Except it makes all of us look like slackers," Clarke hits Lexa's nose with her hopefully clean brush. Clean or not Lexa's jaw drops before she quickly snaps it shut, giving Clarke a glare. "There better not be paint on my face now."

"There's not."

"I don't believe you."

"I'm not lying," Clarke replies teasingly.

Lexa simply continues her glare. To which Clarke smiles innocently before stepping back to her easel. Before she can think better of it Lexa smacks Clarke on the butt. Quickly making her escape while double-checking no one saw her action. "Ow!" Glaring at the retreating figure Clarke vows to get Lexa back.


"You and Lexa do it yet?"

"Really O?"

"What? I need to know." Back against Clarke's side Octavia's legs were in Raven's lap. They were having a Netflix binge night. Walker grunts and rasps the background noise to their sudden conversation. Along with the chewing of popcorn as Octavia throws a handful into her mouth.

"She raises a good question. I mean, you two have been inseparable lately," Raven adds.

"Not to mention you're always touching. Like always. Get a room."

"You're one to talk. What about you and Lincoln? You guys are pretty touchy," Clarke shoots back.

"Yeah and we also have sex. Awesome. Amazing. Great sex." She gets an impish look on her face.

"Please don't share anymore details. Besides, just because we touch a lot doesn't mean we have to be having sex."

"Clarke. Octavia and I have caught you two with your tongues literally down each others throats multiple times."

"Way too many," Octavia adds between bites of popcorn.

"So, as your loving and concerned friends. We need to know if Lexa has been scratching your itch," Raven snorts.

"Okay, first, don't say that ever again. That was disturbing. Second, we haven't done anything," Clarke pouts, "At least not really."

"What's taking so long Griffin?"

"I'd figure you'd be in the studio all over each other when nobody's there." Clarke nudges Octavia away with a shrug of her shoulder. Octavia in turn sticks her tongue out.

"I would never have sex in the studio. That's just gross. And it's not like we haven't tried to go all the way. We have. It's just…I don't know…either we get interrupted or…one of us gets nervous."

"Nervous? You guys make heart eyes each time you get a glimpse of each other. You two have nothing to be nervous about."

"Yeah…I just. I really like her you guys. Like a lot."

"Aaaaw. Our Little Griffin is falling in looove," Raven makes pinching motions with her fingers like she's going to pinch Clarke's cheeks. Turning away so that Raven can't see her fiery blush, Clarke grabs a few pieces of popcorn before throwing them at Raven saying, "Shut up."


Sitting on Lexa's bed Clarke scoots closer to the girl who was determinedly trying to finish her branding project. One hand pulls the shoulder of Lexa's shirt to the side while the other hand inches it's way around Lexa's waist. Clarke's fingers begin to play with the end of Lexa's shirt. Lightly teasing the skin underneath. Lips soon brush an exposed tanned shoulder. "Clarke," Lexa exhales, "I really, mmnm, I really need to finish this before we leave."

Bringing her kisses up and behind an adorably small ear Clarke whispers, "I'm not stopping you."

"You are…distracting me," despite these words she rolls her head to the side. With a grin Clarke nips at Lexa's pulse for a few seconds. Earning another moan deep from Lexa's throat. Removing her lips completely Clarke tries to conceal her massive grin. Fingers pulling away as well she says, "Fine. I'll stop."

With an indignant grunt Lexa stares back at Clarke's cheeky face. "You better not."

"I thought you wanted to foc—

Clarke's play of innocence was interrupted by a pair of lips covering her own. Lexa pushes her laptop to the side before turning around fully. "I can focus later." Long fingers wrap themselves in blonde hair, pulling Clarke closer. Moaning Clarke opens her mouth, tongue grazing Lexa's bottom lip.

Lexa is soon being pushed back. Barely caring about her head bumping the corner of her laptop. "Clarke," Lexa breathes out. Green eyes shut tightly as attention is back on the smooth skin of her neck. Clarke can't help but pull flushed skin between her teeth. Sucking hard enough to leave a mark. And another. Then another.

The flat of Clarke's tongue leaves a thin trail of saliva connecting each mark to the next. Breaths quickening Lexa can feel her underwear dampen. Her moans turn into whimpers. "Clarke. Please." Lexa's hips rise desperate for contact.

She pushes a hand beneath Clarke's shirt. Impatiently sliding around the cup of Clarke's bra in order to pinch at a hardened nipple and encourage Clarke further. "Shit," Clarke gasps. Eyes squeezed shut she tries to regain her senses. All of which are suddenly torn between her sensitive nipple and the pulse of heat between her thighs.

Sitting up both girls groan at the loss of contact. Looking into deep forest green eyes Clarke adjusts herself so she's straddling Lexa's waist. Grinding her hips down, she grins at the tortured expression on Lexa's face. Bottom lip caught between her teeth, Lexa breathes out another moan when Clarke circles her hips again. "Why are you going so slow?" Lexa asks unhappily as her back makes contact with the bed again. Laughing Clarke leans down kissing Lexa's cheek. "You are very impatient when you're turned on."

"I wonder why," she quips back sarcastically. This causes Clarke to laugh harder. Kissing Lexa on the lips and then on the tip of her nose. Building up a rhythm with her hips Clarke is content slowly torturing Lexa. Enjoying the little noises the brunette makes while trying to simultaneously express her discontent with Clarke's pacing.

Knowing the blonde could tease her forever Lexa removes her hand from under Clarke's shirt. Instead pulling the garment off of the blonde completely with minimal difficulty. Kissing Clarke's chest she unhooks the lacey bra before pushing it to the side. Feeling as well as hearing the catch of Clarke's breath, Lexa chuckles around the hardened nipple between her teeth.

"You've made your point," Clarke says before pushing their lips back together in desperate kiss. Long fingers tease Clarke's stomach. Sending little bolts of electricity from Lexa's fingertips to Clarke's skin, which then zip around the tightening coil in Clarke's belly.

"Damn it Lexa. We're wearing to many clothes," Clarke hisses.

Laughing Lexa doesn't disagree. Removing her own shirt she's about to help Clarke with her pants when there's an insistent pounding of a fist against her locked door. "I was trying to be nice and let you two finish but since you are TAKING SO LONG Lexa get your horny ass out here and drag Griffin with you. We were supposed to leave 15 minutes ago!"

Letting out a frustrated groan Lexa cries, "Fuck!"

"Is what we aren't going to get to do," Clarke mutters unhappily. Head leaning on Lexa's shoulder.

"Don't make me kick this door open! I don't care if you two are naked. I'm starving," Anya adds.

"We'll meet you downstairs Anya," Lexa answers. Giving Clarke a kiss on the lips she sits up. Looking around for the shirt she only just took off.

"For someone betting on when we'll have sex she sure does love to interrupt us."

"Well she already lost her bet of a week. So now she's punishing us," Lexa scowls.

"Really?"

"It's probably half the reason," Lexa watches Clarke pull her shirt back on, wishing it could remain on the floor.

Grinning Clarke teases her shirt back up, the skin of her stomach exposed to Lexa's gaze again, "You know, we could just ignore Anya and finish where we left off."

"As much as I would like that," Lexa's eyes are focused on the tantalizing skin before her, "Really. Anya would throw a fit on purpose. Killing both of our libidos."

"I liked it better when you two weren't dating and Lexa and I actually got to EAT real FOOD on TIME," each raise of her voice was punctuated with a kick to Lexa's door.

"Told you."

"She's acting really childish," Clarke pouts, dropping her shirt. Closing her laptop Lexa brings it with her as she slides off her bed. "She's only acting this way because I promised to pay for her drinks tonight." Setting the laptop on her desk she grabs Clarke's hand. Opening her door they are greeted with an eerie smile on Anya's thin lips.

"I'm glad you two are finally ready," she wraps her arms around Lexa, "I'm ordering the most expensive drink on the menu to make up for how long you two made me wait."

"You are not. I shouldn't even pay for you anymore," Lexa grunts.

"But you're going to because I'm the one who helped you pass your art history exam." When they reach the living room Anya releases Lexa before grabbing her jacket from the couch. Slipping it on she adds, "I'm driving," opening the kitchen door she unlocks her black Camaro waiting in the garage, "Lexa you are not allowed to sit in the back with Griffin. We are not having a repeat of last time."

Rolling her eyes Lexa gets in the passenger seat.

"Maybe if you'd let us finish for once we wouldn't have to continue in your car," Clarke replies as she reaches to open her door. Anya snorts. There is a click of the locks seconds before Clarke can pull on her handle.

"Real mature. Anya, open the door."

Anya starts the car.

"Anya!"

Rock music is turned up before Anya shifts the car into reverse.

"Damn it Anya!" Clarke crosses her arms. She steps away just incase Anya actually starts to drive. Clarke hears the locks click again and wastes no time hopping into the back seat. "Thank you Lexa," Clarke chirps giving Lexa a kiss on the cheek before sticking her tongue out at Anya.

"It was worth a shot," Anya replies before pressing the button to open the garage door.


"Tell Anya to drive like a sane person," Clarke says with a laugh, phone held between her ear and shoulder. Grunting she attempts to stuff a final pair of shoes into her suitcase.

"I can tell her. But that doesn't mean she'll listen. Don't worry Clarke. We've made this trip multiple times." Clarke can picture the grin on Lexa's gorgeous face.

"I know. But I'd appreciate it if she brought my girlfriend back in one piece," Clarke was smiling. She didn't think she'd get tired of being able to say the word girlfriend.

"I'll relay your concerns," a trunk slams shut in the background, "You drive safely too. Don't let Octavia's music cause your ears to bleed."

"Haha, she's already been warned about her music choices."

"Hey! My music is fine! Tell Lexa to mind her own business," Octavia says from her bed, "Raven likes my music."

"Raven can't say no to you," Clarke laughs.

"I know," Octavia grins cheekily.

"Yes!" Clarke cheers when the suitcase finally zips closed.

"Did you remember your toothbrush?"

"Shit. Why didn't you tell me sooner." Clarke unzips the bag just enough to be able to squeeze her tooth brush into the side. She walks into the bathroom.

"I can't believe you're still packing."

"Hey. I'm finished as soon as I stuff this dumb toothbrush away."

"But imagine if you had done this all last night, and not hours before Raven comes to pick you up."

"Quiet. Not all of us are as punctual as you."

"That you are not."

"Rude." Zipping it shut again, Clarke sighs, "Now, I am officially packed."

"Congratulations."

"Shut up. Have you started driving yet?"

"You tell me to shut up and then ask me a question. You are sending mixed signals here Clarke."

"Don't be an ass," Clarke joins in Lexa's laughter. Wishing the girl was there so she could punch her in the shoulder for that comment.

"Yes, we're driving."

"Okay. Well then I'm going to let you go, so you can keep an eye out on Anya," Clarke laughs.

"Alright. I'll text you or call you when I get home."

"You better. Be safe."

"We will. You be safe too."

"We will." There's a pause for a moment. Clarke bites her lip, three words bubbling up and begging to be said. She can practically taste them. Hearing Lexa's exhale through the phone she settles with, "I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"This week needs to go by quickly."

"It will."

"It better. Bye."

"I'll talk to you later…bye."

There is silence on the phone as neither girl speaks, but neither hangs up. Clarke can faintly hear Anya speaking in the background but the words are muffled. With a sigh Clarke finally pulls the phone away from her ear, hitting 'end call'.

"Could you two get any more gross?" Octavia grins walking passed Clarke.

"Hey. That was nowhere near you and Lincoln's hour long 'no I love you more' nights."

"That only happened once. And I was a little drunk. I can't help it if my affectionate side is awakened under intoxication."

"It's happened twice. And you were not drunk the second time."

"How would you know?"

"It happened in the middle of the day." Clarke gets a Snapchat notification and unlocks her phone.

"Day drinking is a thing Clarke."

"Alright O." Smiling down at her phone Clarke reads the words 'She's making fun of us' accompanied by a picture of Anya making a kissing face. Taking a picture of Octavia when she's not looking Clarke types 'so was she' before hitting send. There's a chirp from Octavia's phone. "Raven's outside! She says 'You bitches better be ready. And yes I mean Clarke'," Octavia exclaims grabbing her bag.

"Seriously. I'm not that bad," Clarke replies with a roll of her eyes.

"You literally just finished packing."

"But I'm finished," Clarke replies standing up.


Singing along with her music Clarke tries to keep herself in the zone. The painting was becoming more and more difficult to continue as time went on. She was seriously debating scrapping the idea altogether. The class' encouraging and supportive words to her cryptic descriptions of it during their "in process" critic are the only reason she hasn't repainted the whole thing. That and the semester will be over in a couple weeks.

"Clarke!"

"Hey!" Earphone ripped from her ear Clarke gives Octavia an angry glare.

"Maybe if you'd answer me for once instead of singing your heart out we wouldn't be in this position."

"Fine. What?" Clarke answers with a roll of her eyes.

"I don't appreciate the attitude," Octavia crosses her arms.

"I'm sorry. Yes, Octavia?"

"That's better," she grins, "Did Raven tell you about her party?"

"The Christmas one?" Clarke sets her paintbrush down.

"Yup."

"She mentioned that she wanted to throw one but not much else."

"Okay," Octavia looks down at her phone for a few seconds, "Well the party is a sure thing but Raven still wants some ideas from all of us. Like do we want to do a Secret Santa? Do we want it to be an ugly Christmas sweater? Stuff like that."

"How would Secret Santa work? I don't think everyone who shows up will be bringing gifts."

"They will if it's invite only and a gift is a requirement for entry."

"I guess," Clarke replies. Picking up her paintbrush she dabs it into her dark blue paint before pushing it into the canvas. "So does she have a day for this party."

"Friday or Saturday before finals week I think. Kind of a last weekend to party before we die thing," Octavia walks back over to the table where she had previously been sitting, "So you have to think of something fun. It'll make it easier to convince Lexa to hang out with us."


Clarke tried to sneakily eavesdrop on Lexa and Jasper's conversation. She was 90% sure he was going to tell Lexa the most embarrassing things he could think of about her. "Yo Griffin. I'm not holding this hat all day. Pick your name now or you're out of Secret Santa."

"What? I'm listening," Clarke replies, attention back on Raven. Who gives her a look before shaking the Santa hat in front of Clarke's face. Giving the brunette her 'you love me' smile Clarke reaches her hand into the hat. "You know, trying to oversee every conversation she has with everybody defeats the purpose of bringing her here to meet all of us."

"No it doesn't. She's still meeting you all. I just gotta make sure none of you embarrass me."

"It's a given, we're going to embarrass you."

"I know," Clarke pouts.

"Hey, if she can handle all of us and all the dirt we tell her about you, maybe she's the one," Raven teases.

Clarke gives her a glare. Trying to ignore the butterflies the words incite. Looking down at her folded piece of paper she opens it saying, "Or I just have to keep her away from you delinquents."

"We are not delinquents…what are we talking about?" Octavia asks coming up, "Oh! Who'd you get?" she attempts to look down at Clarke's paper.

Quickly folding it and shoving it in her pocket Clarke answers, "You guys are definitely delinquents. And nice try but I'm not telling."

"Come ooon, I'll tell you who I got."

"I think you're missing the point of Secret Santa O," Raven says.

"You only gotta keep it a secret from the person you got," Octavia waves off.

"Maybe in Octavia land," Clarke says, eyes searching for Lexa.

"Octavia land is the place to be."

"Did everybody pick from the hat?" Raven asks the room. There was still a piece of paper waiting all by itself. "Oh…I didn't," Lexa says stepping away from Finn. Clarke can't help but give them a questioning look. More than a little curious about what they could possibly have been talking about. Finn gives her a half smile before walking away. "Who'd you get Lexa?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

"That's why I asked," Octavia says in a duh voice before stage whispering to Clarke, "I'm not so sure she's as smart as you say she is." Grinning mischievously Octavia pulls Raven away with her. She can ask Jasper who he got. Before a grinning Lexa can comment Clarke blurts out, "So who'd you get?"

"If I'm not telling Octavia, I'm not telling you," she chuckles.

"I could help you figure out what they'd want."

"That's okay. I think I can find out on my own." Clarke nods her head in concession. Awkwardly trying to think of something else to say.

"So, you tell people I'm smart? If I remember correctly the other day you said I was a 'doofus'."

"You are a doofus. Who else can quote a deep sea documentary because they watch it constantly?"

"It's a great series okay. Who even uses the word doofus anymore?" Lexa replies grinning.

"I do," Clarke sticks out her tongue.

"Hey, either of you up for a round of Mario kart?" Monty asks coming up, controller extended.

"Count me in," Clarke answers taking the controller before grabbing Lexa's hand and pulling her to the living room.


Upbeat Christmas music was leaking out from Raven's house at a concerning volume. Parking her car across the street from the house, which had lights strung up from the steps to the roof, Anya snorts, "This party is definitely going to get busted."

"You'd be surprised what Raven can get away with," Clarke replies giving Lexa's fingers a tug. Not wanting to release Clarke's hand Lexa grabs their gifts from the floor of the car with her free hand. Passing Clarke's to her before grabbing her own and exiting the vehicle. "Can't wait to see her talk her way out of this sound complaint," Anya says locking the car. She walks ahead of them to the house. Lexa attempts not to cringe as they walk up the steps. "I don't think Mariah Carey is meant to be listened to at this volume. All of their eardrums must be shattered inside the house."

Clarke's response is just a laugh as she pulls Lexa forward.

Once inside they are quickly greeted by everyone, red and green plastic cups are shoved into their hands before they can even reach the kitchen. They're told to leave their gifts on the kitchen table for later. Which Anya comments is a stupid place to leave them, because of the drunks who will go searching for their gifts. Raven's response was, "Who invited you?" Anya presented her gift, to which Raven stated, "If it's not for me you can't stay." With a roll of brown eyes, Anya placed the gift on the table, took a green jell-o shot, and left the kitchen.

Pressed up against the door Lexa gasps, "We should probably make our way back to everyone." Her fingers are wrapped in Clarke's hair. Tugging when soft lips move across her skin. They lasted an hour downstairs. Dancing and drinking. When Lexa's eyes began to darken Clarke knew they needed to escape. To get away from everyone.

They were hidden in Raven's room, which she conveniently forgot to lock. Clarke finishes sucking a mark onto the skin of Lexa's stomach before responding, "We've only been gone for a few minutes. I doubt they've even noticed." She kisses up Lexa's chest. Moving around the bra. She smirks when a gasp is produced from a kiss under Lexa's jaw.

After another tug on her hair from Lexa, Clarke happily moves forwards to capture Lexa's kiss swollen lips again. Lexa flips them over so that Clarke's back is against the locked door. One hand leaves Clarke's hair to grip at her hips. Pulling their hips together as she slides a leg between Clarke's. The resulting moan is what she needed to slip her tongue into Clarke's mouth.

Rocking their hips together the buzz in Lexa's body is less from alcohol and all from Clarke. The warm tension in her stomach created from arousal but also more. She gives Clarke a softer kiss. Letting their lips brush together and tingle. She rests their foreheads together and slowly opens her eyes. Green eyes mesmerized by the face before her. Clarke's eyes are shut tight. Her breathing ragged. Lexa is amazed that the beautiful girl she's touching, the girl she's making moan and curse, is hers. She increases the pressure of her leg on the warmth coming from between Clarke's legs.

"Lexa," Clarke breathes, "Fuck," she opens her eyes. Dark eyes meet Lexa's, begging more than her words of, "Please, I need more."

Body stilling, Lexa asks, "Are you sure?"

"God yes," Clarke answers. Arching as she pulls Lexa back to her body. She was getting close. She could feel it. She is wet and her clit is pulsing. Having Lexa stop right now, was the opposite of what she wanted. Blinking to try and clear her head, she finds Lexa's hands and intertwines their fingers. "But only if you're okay," she says looking Lexa in the eyes. Watching her face for any hesitation. For any sign that the brunette wasn't as sober as she previously thought. Her left hand drops Lexa's, reaching up to gently trace her thumb over Lexa's bottom lip. Slowly working it away from biting teeth.

Lexa's eyes grow soft, like a gentle breeze. She gently pushes Clarke back against the door again. Eyes slowly scanning Clarke's face. Double-checking that this was okay.

Clarke didn't want to put a name to the emotions that watered Lexa's eyes. By the hitch in her own chest, and the feelings circling through her own body, she knew it wouldn't remain nameless for long. She's not sure when her gaze turned to Lexa's lips, but when slender fingers graze her cheek before wrapping behind her ear, her eyes jump back to Lexa's. She only manages to look into the darkened green eyes for a few seconds before hers are closed. Moaning into the kiss that is somehow gentle, yet hard at the same time. Lexa's tongue is against her bottom lip. Tasting and teasing. Pressing into the seal of Clarke's lips until mouths are opened. Kiss becoming the wet meeting of tongues and teeth.

Clarke's head is knocked back against the door once she feels fingers push passed her jeans and slip through the waistband of her Christmas underwear. Blunt nails lightly scratch at the top of trimmed curls. "Fucking shit." Blonde head knocks against wood again as she hooks her leg around Lexa's. "Lexa. Lexa please don't tease me," she gasps out. Fingers trace her outer lips with possibly the only intention of driving her crazy.

"Okay," Lexa kisses into the skin of Clarke's flushed neck. Moaning when she feels how wet Clarke is. One finger easily slips inside, and Lexa's body shudders with Clarke's. Her eyes nearly roll at the feeling of her finger being hugged by pulsing inner walls. With a breathy pant of Clarke's name, index finger joins the middle as she waits for Clarke's body to adjust.

Never wanting Lexa to leave her body Clarke's arms wrap around Lexa's neck. Pulling the girl forward like there was any more room left between them to be filled. When Lexa begins to steadily pump in and out, Clarke is sure the only reason her body isn't on the floor is because she's sandwiched between Lexa and the door.

Clarke's encouraging moans and pleads, keep Lexa going.

As her fingers move faster and her arm steadily starts to burn, Lexa's mouth is back over Clarke's. Muffling her favorite moans as they become too loud to keep their presence hidden away in Raven's room.

Fingers pull quiet painfully at the baby curls of Lexa's neck when Clarke breaks their kiss to say, "I'm so close babe. Mmm, faster."

Gentle kisses are pressed continuously around Clarke's face and neck, as the blonde shudders. Her body quickly forgetting it's need to stay upright as it become lost in the feelings of pleasure. Lexa's other arm wraps round Clarke's waist to hold the girl up. Smiling into Clarke's neck as Clarke begins to laugh. "Fuck Lexa. I think you turned my legs into jelly."

"Maybe that was my goal."

"Well you did it." Clarke let's out a small gasp as fingers slip out from her vagina.

"Good." Lexa's eyes close with a moan as she licks Clarke off of her fingers.

"Shit. That's hot."

Foreheads pressed together Lexa laughs opening her eyes again. Tracing her fingers over Clarke's bottom lips she sighs contently.

Clarke kisses Lexa's fingertips. Tempted to suck them into her mouth.

Suddenly there's the sound of the doorknob. Clicking as it's turned back and forth. Clarke and Lexa jump apart as if the door had actually opened. The turning stops and instead a pounding on the door starts as Raven's voice is heard, "I swear to GOD if you two are having sex on my bed I'm killing you both using my ruined sheets."

Clarke laughs at Lexa's frantic look. She tosses Lexa her shirt. Then kisses the brunette once more before double-checking their appearance, and buttoning her pants back up. With an intake of breath Clarke opens the door. Raven gives one glance at their disheveled appearance and tomato red faces. Rolling her eyes she chuckles, "It's time to exchange gifts, love birds. Sorry I had to interrupt."

"We weren't on your bed," Lexa blurts out, face growing another shade of red.

"Good to know. Glad that I don't have to go on Santa's naughty list for murder. You two on the other hand…"

"Gifts right! Let's go," Clarke shoves Raven back down the hallway.

Clarke is thankful that everyone sitting in a circle on the floor is either tipsy or drunk. As Clarke and Lexa trail behind Raven, like teenagers being escorted by a teacher to the principle's office, they're the last two to get their gifts and sit in the circle. There are oohs and giggles from the group of friends. But less teasing than Clarke anticipated. Everyone more focused on the gifts in their hands.

"Let the gift exchange begin! Since I'm the wonderful hostess that I am I'll start off," Raven says. She stands up and walks over to Harper. "Merry Christmas Harper!"

"Thank you."

As Raven goes to sit back down Harper gets up and goes to Clarke.

"Here you go."

"Thanks," Clarke takes the gift and sets it next to her before getting up. She goes to Murphy, Murphy to Octavia, and Octavia to Monty. She makes sure to wink and tell him that her gift is "epic" and he's going to love it. Monty laughs his thanks before turning to Finn. Finn goes to Lexa and Lexa gives her gift to Monroe. Monroe throws her gift at Jasper with a "think fast". He fumbles with it. Drunkenness no help for his coordination. With Monty's quicker reflexes the gift is saved from the floor. With a cheer Monty and Jasper hold the gift in the air to show off their success. Jumping up to his feet Jasper walks over to Raven. With an exaggerated bow that nearly knocks him over Jasper presents, "the last gift to the wonderful hostess."

"Thank you," Raven laughs taking the gift.

"But not actually the last," Anya holds her gift out to Raven without actually looking at the brunette next to her.

"You actually got a gift for me?"

"Couldn't show up empty handed right. Plus it's your house. Who else am I going to give the gift to?"

"Thanks. Sorry I don't have one to give back."

"No worries."

"Can we open our gifts yet?!" Octavia asks fingers already starting to rip at the paper covering hers.

"Yes Octavia. Everybody can start opening their gifts."

The room was then filled with the sounds of the shredding of paper and excited laughter. The chatter in the room soon escalates as gifts are revealed. The range of reactions going from Monty's excited squeal at opening his gift. The game case for Pokémon X in his hands. Nearly tackling Octavia as he spews out thank yous and Merry Christmas'. Laughing Octavia say, "I told you it was epic. Expect to lose next time we battle". Then there was Murphy's disbelieving chuckle at the yellow SpongeBob mug in his hands, filled with stickers and fake tattoos. The next time he catches Clarke's eyes he gives her a nod in thanks. The most violent reaction is Raven's. Who punched Jasper in the gut for his gag gift (lump of coal soap).

As Anya's car pulls into the back parking lot of Mark Hall Lexa nervously picks at the wrapped gift in her lap. Unbuckling her seatbelt Clarke leans passed the middle to kiss Lexa on the cheek before turning to Anya, "Thanks for driving me back. Raven texted me and wants you to know she's going to get you a gift that beats yours."

"She can try," Anya smirks.

Looking back at Lexa, Clarke asks, "See you tomorrow?"

"Actually I was wondering if you would mind if I stayed over?"

"Of course I don't mind!" Clarke grins, excitedly fumbling her way out of the car. Almost forgetting her new set of stick charcoal in the back seat. She grabs it quickly before rushing out to open Lexa's door for her. As Lexa gets out the car she turns back to Anya, "Text me when you get home."

"I will," Anya smirks, "Have fun with Blondie. I know she's going to love her gift."

"Bye Anya," she replies closing the door. Face burning she follows Clarke into her dorm.

Once behind the closed door of Clarke's room Lexa grows increasingly nervous. Clarke moves straight for her backpack, putting her new art supplies away in the front pocket. When she stands up to put her shoes and jacket in her closet she notices Lexa is still standing by the door. With an arch of her eyebrow she says, "You know you don't have to wait for permission to get comfortable."

"Yeah. Yeah, I know," she inches her way towards Clarke's bed.

"What's up? Are you okay?" Clarke asks eyeing Lexa. She is acting weird. Is she regretting asking to stay over? Before Clarke can work herself up into a panic with different excuses Lexa is standing in front of her. Blush turning the tips of her ears pink.

"I'm fine. Promise. I um…it's just…"

As Lexa stumbles Clarke finally notices the small wrapped gift being toyed with by nervous fingers. Blue eyes glance back up to Lexa's face.

After straightening her chest Lexa breathes, "So I actually got you a gift as well."

"Really? I got one for you too," Clarke laughs. It's relieved laughter. Lexa was scaring her for a second. Clarke goes to her dresser to go get her hidden gift.

While her back is turned Lexa lets out a huge sigh of relief. They hadn't discussed exchanging gifts for themselves. But Lexa knew she had to get Clarke something. Something more than the simple gifts that were given at the party. (Excluding Octavia's gift to Monty. That one was hard to beat.) As nervous butterflies start flapping their wings in her stomach Lexa can only hope her gift isn't too much.

"I know we still have a while until Christmas, so I don't know if you actually want to open it now or wait," Lexa says trying not to rip through the wrapping paper as her fingers continue to pick at the taped triangle.

"Open them now. I want to see your reaction to mine."

Nodding Lexa hands Clarke her gift in exchange of her own. The room feels like it went up a few degrees. Clarke doesn't know why her hands are shaking as she tries to open her gift. Eyes nervously glancing at Lexa every few seconds to see how close the brunette is to revealing her present. She's distracted however when she opens the lid of hers to see a small tube of Phthalo Blue oil paint. She laughs lightly. She can't believe Lexa actually got it for her. Then she sees the chain that's also in the box.

Looking up blue eyes meet green. Lexa had paused. Hand still clutching wrapping paper, mid rip. Her eyes are wide and searching. Attempting to catalogue every nuance of Clarke's reaction.

Pulling the necklace out Clarke places the box on her dresser. Using both hands to hold it up. Her eyes water looking at the three layers. The top is a beaded with small black beads which are separated by stones that look like the moon phases. The middle is a silver chain with the infinity symbol in the center. The final is again beaded, this time the black beads are broken up by the planets of the solar system (Pluto included).

"Anya wanted me to tell you some cheesy line about how you're my universe or my eternity but I told her I wasn't going to say that. It's not…I mean…I saw this necklace and I thought of you," her fingers fidget with the present in her hands, "It made me think about how quickly we began to orbit each other. Like, my life doesn't revolve around you per se. But our paths crossed and now I'll happily continue to follow you. Like, um, like how one moment you were just this girl sitting next to me who cursed at her computer screen and the next you're Clarke, my girlfriend. Who I spend countless nights in the studio with and then I still can't wait to see you again the next day."

Lexa's cheeks were burning. She didn't mean to let that all spill out from her mouth. But once she started she couldn't stop.

"I love you."

"What?" Lexa nearly drops the gift in her hands.

Clarke slides herself into Lexa's arms. Kissing Lexa like this is the first time she ever has, and as if she never wants to stop. When she finally does she hold Lexa's face in her hands as she repeats, "I love you." There's no time for her to second guess herself because it's Lexa who brings their faces back together to kiss Clarke again. The kiss breaks because they're both smiling too much. "I love you too," Lexa grins.

"Good," Clarke sighs.

"Good," Lexa kisses Clarke, hands pulling their bodies together, "Would you be insulted if I said this is better than opening your gift?"

"I'd say yes just to tease you. But your gift was way better than mine. I love you is my new gift," she laughs.

"Well now I have to open yours."

"You better!"

"Ha-ha what happened to I love you being my new gift?"

"I mean, I still want you to open it…Lexa…did you drop my gift?" Clarke moves away from Lexa's body to look at the partially unwrapped box on the floor.

"I'm sorry!" Lexa's blushes picking it back up quickly, "I must have forgotten about it when we were kissing."

"You're lucky you're cute," Clarke playfully glares.

"Sorry. I love it."

"I doubt that. You dropped it."

"It was an accident!"

"What if my gift is fragile?" Clarke tries to keep herself from laughing.

"I was caught up in the heat of the moment. I can't be responsible for my appendages when you say I love you and then kiss me!"

"Did you just call your hands appendages?"

"No…" Lexa's face was scarlet.

"I love you, you doofus. Open your gift before you do something else I can tease you about."

"Okay," Lexa quickly pulls off the last piece of tape keeping the wrapping paper on the box. She opens it, pulls the tissue paper out, and immediately starts laughing. "Clarke!"

"I told you yours was better!"

"Clarke I can't believe," she was laughing to hard to finish her sentence.

"You're laughing because you like it, right?" Clarke pouts, crossing her arms.

"It's the best gift I've gotten in forever," she grins kissing Clarke's cheek.

Inside the box was a set of four miniature Yankee Candles. What made them great was that Clarke had created her own labels for each candle. A dark purple, maybe black, candle labeled "Studio Nights" had the image of an easel and a studio stool. A light blue candle, which was probably one of the ones with ocean or beach in its original name, said "Squids Live Here", with an adorably drawn cartoon squid. Then there was a dark green candle that said "Kiss Me" with a picture of Clarke pursing her lips, and holding mistletoe over her head. The last candle might just be her favorite though. A white candle with the words "How I Feel When Anya Drives" and an image of a (fairly detailed) skull and crossbones.

"Clarke this is amazing," Lexa laughs, pulling the blonde into a hug.

"You're welcome."


Clarke was alone in the studio. And for once she was glad. Hot, stinging tears were falling down her cheeks. No matter how quickly she wiped them away, with paint stained fingers, they just kept falling. It didn't help that she couldn't stop staring at the painting sitting in front of her. Thick, swirling globs of black, blue, brown, and grey paint made a tornado of colors. Colors that swallowed parts of the shadowy figure on the right side of the canvas. Between these thick strokes of paint would be thin and thick lines of red and orange. Looking like cracks of scalding, molten lava breaking through the charred outer layer. The parts of the silhouetted figure's body that wasn't completely camouflaged stood out against the reddish orange background. When you looked hard enough this background revealed hints of a cityscape.

Wiping her brushes on her towel Clarke quickly gets up from her stool. Suddenly needing to be as far away from the painting as she could. Flashes of memories assaulted her mind like an angry slideshow.

R u still in the graphic design studio? She sends the text while walking out of the studio. Leaving the door open just a crack so she wouldn't have to punch in the code to unlock it later.

Yeah. What's up?

I'm coming over.

Okay. I'll open the door for you.

thanks

Technically non-graphic design majors aren't "supposed" to be in the graphic design studio. Some unofficial official rule set in place by somebody who thought just because they got a refurbished studio space with fancy, clean computers they could separate themselves from all the other art majors who are stuck with old tools and medium crusted fingernails.

Clarke has only ever been in the design studio twice before. The first time was a complete accident. And one of the most embarrassing moments of her life. (How does one trip into a classroom? While a class is in progress! Clarke will never understand.) The second time was with Lexa a few weeks ago when the brunette was panicking about her final project. She needed a second opinion to agree with her that she didn't know how to create a proper logo or matching product design or website template. She should drop the graphic design major right then, altogether. Who cares if she only has one year left?

Clarke was able to convince her that although the design could use some adjustments, it wasn't in fact the worst design on the face of the whole planet earth. (Lexa may have been running on 3 hours of sleep that day).

A shaky breath is released from Clarke's chest as she approaches the studio. Already she can hear a song by the Broods slipping through the studio doors. Lexa must be the only one in there tonight. She opens the door and closes it quietly. Easily finding Lexa in the middle of the room, face two inches away from the computer as she squints at the screen. She makes her way next to the brunette pulling out the cushioned rolly seat next to her. "Hi," Lexa smiles.

"Hey," she tries to give Lexa a convincing smile but she knows it doesn't work.

"Are you okay?" Lexa turns in her seat to face Clarke completely.

Sighing Clarke scoots her chair closer to Lexa's and lays her head on her shoulder. "My painting is basically finished. I don't want to look at it anymore."

Lexa hums in response to the answer. Giving Clarke a soft kiss on her head before saying, "Want to see what I'm working on?"

Clarke nods.

After Lexa went through all of the files she was currently working on for her final project, telling Clarke what she liked and what she was struggling with on each of them, it only took about thirty minutes of silence before Clarke was muttering through sniffles, "My dad was an engineer. And not just any engineer, he worked for NASA. He was amazing. He was smart. And then he died. He was an astronaut. He got to go to space. He risked his life numerous times getting on those shuttles. He was fucking amazing. But then he died three years ago—today—because of an accident," taking a shaky breath Clarke presses her face into Lexa's shoulder. Trying to press the tears that wanted to spill back into her eyes.

"It was so fucking stupid. He was an astronaut and he didn't even die in space," huffing Clarke sits up. Fingers clenched into fists, nail biting into her palms. "It was some fucking accident at work. He was helping one of his coworkers with their machine, and fell from the ladder. Landed wrong. And that was it. He was gone," she sighs, "I was so angry. I'd make drawings about it. And when I finished I'd rip them up. Burn them if I was really mad. I did that for the longest time. Until it became just so exhausting that I was sick of drawing altogether. I literally threw out all of my art supplies. It's why I started out as pre-med."

Lexa felt like her chest was burning. She's not sure she's taken a breath since Clarke started talking. Clarke shifts a moment before looking Lexa in the eyes. Her blue eyes red rimmed and watery. "This is the first painting I've made about him in little over a year and I just…I just want to punch a hole through it."

Lexa wraps an almost dry sobbing Clarke into her arms. Kissing her cheeks and forehead. Lexa is quiet while she holds Clarke. Listening to her girlfriend's ragged breaths, mixing with the quiet words coming from new song that has started. After a minute or so Lexa gives Clarke's forehead another kiss.

"When I was a child me and my best friend Costia made up our own world. We even made up a language. Well, we made up some words really. Not a full on language. But I was the commander, or Heda, and she was my Keryon, my spirit. We ruled together bringing peace, first to our stuffed animal kingdom, and then to our dolls. We kept this a secret between us for a long time. A surprisingly long time," she laughs, "Anyways, if you can picture it, I was a bossy child. I believed that I was meant to be a leader. It was my birthright. I knew what decisions needed to be made. So most of my family thought when Costia called me Heda she was just saying 'leader' wrong because of her speech impediment. They thought it was cute. It wasn't until Costia and I started dating that they learned about the language."

"Sounds like you were a handful," Clarke says with a sniffle.

"Maybe just a little bit," Lexa grins. She looks Clarke in the eyes while wiping away the last of her tears. After a shaky breath she continues, "When Costia died I absolutely hated the nickname. I didn't deserve it. I didn't protect her. My Keryon was gone so Heda was dead."

Clarke's eyes snap to Lexa's. Both girls try to keep themselves together. "It took a long time for me to accept that I couldn't have done anything to save her. And I'm not telling you this for you to feel bad for me. Or to take away from your pain from your father's death. But once I let myself grieve, and forgave myself, Heda didn't sound so bad. It made me think of the all the times she'd call me Heda. How much fun we had, and how much I loved her."

Clarke takes Lexa's hands. Kissing her palms. She wipes the tear sliding down Lexa's cheek.

"You love making art. And you love your dad. You're allowed to be angry and sad. But maybe…if next time you try and make art that's happy. That celebrates your father's life. Maybe some of the weight will be lifted off your chest too when you think about him."

Clarke pulled Lexa by her neck to smash their lips together, catching Lexa by surprise. The kiss is hard. Painful in it's beginning. But after Lexa's grunt of pain, Clarke softens. Apologetically kissing Lexa's lips. The kisses taste like salt. With stuttering breaths Clarke pulls away whispering, "I love you."

"I love you too," Lexa kisses Clarke's cheek.

"I've always been so angry about it. I've never really thought about making positive art for him," Clarke intertwines their fingers, "But he deserves some happy art."

Lexa nods agreeing.

"Maybe I'll redo my beach painting. But put him in it."

"I think that'd be a nice painting," her thumb traces the back of Clarke's hand.

Sighing Clarke leans on Lexa. The twisting of her stomach lessened. Coming up to see the brunette was a good call. Closing her eyes Clarke lets Lexa's presence soothe her now that all her tension has been aired. Her body content feeling the rise and fall of Lexa's breathing.


"I'm bored," Octavia groans, flopping over on her bed.

"Studying isn't supposed to be fun," Clarke laughs.

"Says the art major with only one exam and one paper," Raven snorts.

"Don't hate. Besides I had a painting to finish, and two other drawing projects to complete. My finals cause just as many sleepless nights as yours do. If not more!"

"Fine, fine."

"I think it's time for a break!" Octavia jumps up. Walking over to Raven and closing her book, then walking over to Clarke. She attempts to shut Clarke's computer but Clarke pushes her away, "If you close this before I can save my paper, and I lose any part of it, there's going to be one less person living in our apartment next year."

Octavia sticks her tongue out. "Save the paper, then close your computer. We need some healthy distractions."

"And what would those be?" Raven asks walking over to their refrigerator and pulling out an Arizona green tea.

"Anything!" Octavia laments, "Netflix, video games, gossip! Give me something besides geology."

"How is that class anyways? Haven't heard you talk about Bangin' Professor in awhile," Raven asks between sips.

"Bangin' Professor is an asshole grader, that's why. Can you believe I had a D in this class for half the semester? It's geology! He may be hot but giving me those grades he was receiving glares from me 90% of the time."

"O, 80% of the population receives glares from you 90% of the time," Clarke says finally closing her computer and giving their conversation her full attention.

"80% of the population is fucking stupid."

"True that," Raven sits down on the bed next to Clarke. There's a chirp from Raven's phone. Both Clarke and Octavia watch as a smile grows on Raven's face while she reads the message. She types out her response, presses send, then looks up to meet two gazes. "What?" She tries to say nonchalantly. Shoving the phone into her pocket.

"Who was that?" Octavia grins mischievously.

"None ya."

"Raaaaven," Octavia whines before sitting in Raven's lap. She wraps her arms around Raven's neck to trap her even more.

"Just someone from a group project okay."

"Are they cute?"

Raven rolls her eyes.

"What? Me and Clarke saw that smile on your face. Right Clarke."

"There was a smile."

"See!" Octavia moves out of Raven's lap but keeps her hold around her neck.

"So what if I smiled," Raven tickles Octavia's waist.

With a squeal of laughter and a, "Stop," Octavia flees to Clarke's side. "Sooo, is this mystery group project buddy a friend or a friend," Octavia waggles her eyebrows.

"I repeat, none ya."

"Clarke, make Raven tell us!"

"O."

"Don't take Raven's side! When's the last time we've been able to tease Raven about someone? We have the right to know if our favorite genius is making a new 'friend'."

"I'm sure Raven would tell us if she was starting anything with anyone," Clarke looks at Raven pointedly.

"Not of it was serious," Octavia mumbles, "Well if Raven won't spill then Clarke it's your turn. How's Lexa?"

"If you want people to spill so badly why don't you just talk about Lincoln instead? But Lexa's good. She's in the studio right now working. She's um…she's going to come pick me up when she's done."

"Oooooh. Going to get some late night studying done tonight. And by studying I mean—

"We know what you mean," Clarke interrupts pink coloring her cheeks.

"Why didn't you go in the studio with her?" Raven asks.

"She's in the design studio."

"So?"

"Clarke's been kicked out of the studio she wasn't even allowed to be in in the first place."

"I wasn't kicked out!"

"Mmhm," Octavia gives Clarke an 'I call bullshit' look.

"It was just suggested that I spend less time in there."

"After what happened again?"

"Clarke what did you do?" Raven laughs.

Clarke pouts, pushing Octavia over before getting off of the bed. "I may have spilled my coffee one night…on a desk…hitting two keyboards…and ruining one of them…"

"Only you Griffin, only you."

"Tell her why Clarke," now the shit eating grin was back on Octavia's face.

"It was an accident O, that's why."

"No, no. I think Raven wants to hear the real answer."

"Yes Raven does!" Raven's grin became identical to Octavia's.

"Ugh! Fine. We were making out okay. I got a little distracted and forgot my cup was behind me."

"What happened to no sex in the studio?" Both Raven and Octavia were laughing. Raven barely able to get the question out between laughs.

"I hate you both," Clarke grumbles walking over to the refrigerator. She pulls out a frozen meal from the freezer section. Under her breath she adds, "The design studio is clean."

After the laughter had subsided and the room was filled with the sound of the microwave humming and popping food, Octavia finally started gushing about Lincoln. The wonderful dates he's been taking her on. How much she really loves him. And the sex. Going into more detail than Clarke would like to hear about her TA, who she still had to see during their final critique. But this brought her to her next question, "When is Lincoln graduating?"

"Next year, thank god. I don't know what I'd do if he was graduating this year. But we've kinda talked about it already. And we've concluded there's no use really worrying about it right now. I mean he's got to think about jobs and possibly moving. But first he's got to focus on his thesis and graduating. We're going to make this work anyway we can, and right now that's focusing on the year and a half we do have. What about you and Lexa?"

"What about me and Lexa?"

"She's a junior right? She'll be graduating next year too."

"Shit, I didn't think about that." Clarke's lungs skip a breath at the realization. It never even occurred to her that Lexa would be graduating before her.

"Isn't she like a triple major or something? That's a lot of classes and credits. She might not be graduating on time," Raven points out.

"Double major with a minor," Clarke replies. She doesn't even taste the spaghetti as she chews it. She needs to talk to Lexa about this. She thought winter break was going to be a challenge. How is she going to go a year or maybe even more! Oh no. If Lexa graduates a year earlier what if she's planning to go to grad school in a different state? Or gets a job across the country! Why hasn't Clarke thought about this before? Their relationship was just beginning. It can't end so quickly.

"Easy there Clarke. I didn't mean to freak you out," Octavia taps Clarke on her forehead.

"What?"

"Me and Raven can hear your brain going into panic mode. Calm down."

"Yeah, like O said about Lincoln, there's still a whole year and a half you still have to be all lovey dovey with Lexa. Don't worry about it right now."

"Right," Clarke breaths, "You're right."

"Of course we are," Raven answers.

"Okay was this a long enough break for you Octavia?"

"I suppose."

"Okay then, back work for us," Clarke goes back to her laptop. She stares at the words on her screen until they blur. She needed to talk to Lexa.


Sighing contently Clarke lets her finger continue to trace shapes on Lexa's bare hip. While Lexa trails lazy kisses across Clarke's body. Following the small path of marks she left earlier. Each peck leaving a burst of warm fuzzies in Clarke's belly.

Clarke giggles when, after having traced a heart into Lexa's skin, she feels one of Lexa's kisses become more of a press of a smile into her side. Lexa crawls her way back up Clarke's body, giving her a final kiss on her lips before nuzzling into the crook of Clarke's neck.

Enjoying the weight of Lexa's body on top of her, Clarke pulls her closer. Loving the feeling of their bodies pressed, skin to skin. Feeling Lexa's easy breaths on her neck makes Clarke just want to kiss Lexa again and again and never stop.

"Oh, I forgot to ask earlier, how were your finals today?" Lexa asks after a few seconds of silence.

"Meh, okay. I only had my drawing critique. It took FORever. How were yours?"

"The communication exam was difficult."

"Really?"

"Mhm."

"I'm sure you did better than you think. You knew all your flashcards yesterday."

"Maybe." Lexa wasn't convinced. She fumbles for a second to find the sheet before pulling it up to cover their bodies.

"What about your business class final?"

"I do feel good about that one."

"Good. " Clarke kisses Lexa's forehead. Lexa's eyes drift closed as she cuddles into the blonde's body even more. Just when blissful unconsciousness pulls at her mind, she hears Clarke whisper, "Hey…Lexa?"

"Mmm?"

"Are you going to be graduating on time?"

Brows furrow, "I still need to speak to my advisor. But I think I need to take an extra semester. Why?"

"I was…I was just thinking…about us," Clarke moves her hands to Lexa's back. Rubbing up and down. Whether she's trying to soothe Lexa or herself, she doesn't know.

"What about us?" Lexa makes a move to sit up, but Clarke tightens her hold. Keeping their bodies pressed together. Lexa can feel and hear when Clarke takes a deep breath.

"You're a year above me. You'll be graduating before me. You'll be…leaving," Clarke mumbles.

"Does that change things?" Lexa is able to pull herself far enough away to look Clarke in her nervous blue eyes.

"Does it?"

"No. Not for me." She takes Clarke's face in the hand not supporting her body. Thumb caressing a smooth cheek, "Clarke, I love you. We're going to make it through winter break. Then we're going to come back to school. You're going to spend the next semester making amazing art. And I'm probably going to work myself crazy, worrying about what I'm doing next. But we're also going to be together and discussing our future together. I'm not worried. And if it makes you feel better, remember that I have a car and only live a few hours away. I can drive here and visit you whenever I want to."

"Okay. Alright. Yeah. I'm sorry. I was just being stupid."

"No you weren't," Lexa presses their lips together, "You weren't being stupid. We'd have this discussion eventually."

"I guess," Clarke looks away. Eyes trying to make out the ceiling in the dark. She feels a leg slip between hers, before arms wrap around her body, and she's flipped on top of Lexa. An urgent kiss muffles her noise of surprise. Her hands instinctually grab onto Lexa to pull her closer. Deepening the kiss. It's when she feels the hands on her waist, stilling her hips, that she pulls away. Both girls were breathing heavily. Chest rising and falling, bumping into each other.

Clarke looks into Lexa's eyes and loses her breath all over again. She doesn't think she's ever seen Lexa's eyes look this way. Pupils are blown and the green is basically black. But if Clarke had never heard Lexa tell her she loved her, this would be the moment. This would be how she'd know. Lexa's eyes held all of her emotions. Right now, it was pure love. It was soft and warm. Lexa was looking at Clarke like she had finally found the thing she'd been searching lifetimes for. She found it and she doesn't want to let it go. They plead with Clarke to believe that distance couldn't separate them. Not if she could help it.

Suddenly overwhelmed, Clarke feels the sting of tears forming. She sucks Lexa's bottom lip in for a kiss before releasing it. Dropping her head she kisses Lexa's jaw, then under her ear, and then her neck.

"Clarke?"

Clarke presses a kiss to Lexa's chest. As a tear finally slips out and over her cheek, Clarke lays her head down. Ear placed over Lexa's rapidly beating heart. Intertwining their fingers Clarke sighs, "We're going to be alright."

Lexa gives their fingers a squeeze. Smiling as her eyes close once again. Relief filling her body at Clarke's words. Lexa's tired mind was no match against Clarke's breaths lulling her to sleep. Similarly the "lub dub, lub dub" of Lexa's heart pulls a smiling Clarke to sleep at well.


"I'm really impressed with your work Clarke," Lincoln says rocking their bodies lightly. Clarke was being squeezed into his broad chest. Strong arms holding her tight and making her feel safe. She now understands why Octavia is always wrapped up in his arms.

"Thanks," she sniffles.

"You're welcome. Don't hesitate next semester to show me your work or ask for advice."

"I won't."

Lincoln releases her. Wiping the remaining tears from Clarke's face. Clarke was the last person to go for critique. She was fine until people started commenting on her last painting. Most of their comments were positive but also inquisitive. She didn't was to delve deep into an explanation (and she didn't, not really) but seeing Lexa's understanding gaze along with surprisingly both Lincoln and Dante's comprehending looks, she couldn't keep herself quiet as together as she wanted to. A least the tears held off until Dante's timer went off, signaling the end of their final exam time.

Smiling Clarke adds before Lincoln can walk away, "This is between me and you. But you could probably win the best hug award. Seriously. I feel so much better. You might just be my favorite hugger."

"I take pride in my hugging skills," Lincoln laughs, "Buuut I think if you want to keep it a secret, you're going to have to stop complementing me now."

He turns Clarke around. Lexa was standing a few feet away, a box of the addictingly delicious frosting covered sugar cookies in her hands.

"You got them?!" Clarke asks practically running over to Lexa.

"Yup. Myles didn't want the extra."

"You're the best girlfriend ever!" Clarke exclaims opening up the box and taking a cookie. She moans after her first bite, "This makes all two hours worth it."

"Hearing Dante complement your growth and say that he believes your true skill exists in you painting with your emotions wasn't worth it," Lexa chuckles.

"This cookie is melting in my mouth right now. Dante could have told me I flunked this class and eating this cookie would be worth it." Lexa can only roll her eyes. She offers a cookie to Lincoln but he declines saying, "I wouldn't want to take any of them away from Clarke."

"You're such a good person," Clarke says taking the box away from Lexa and walking over to where her paintings were still sitting on their easels.

"So when do you leave for break?" Lexa asks.

"The grads final critique is tomorrow morning. So I'll be finished then, but I'll be staying a little longer to spend some time with Octavia. How about you two?"

"This was my last final," Clarke replies through a mouthful of a second cookie.

"Clarke is leaving with Octavia and Raven tomorrow. I'm actually not leaving until Saturday morning. My friend Anya has a late final tomorrow night and doesn't want to drive home in the dark."

"That's not too bad."

"Nope."

"Lincoln we have to have all our stuff out of here tomorrow right?"

"That's correct."

"What about if I'm coming back next semester? Can I leave my stuff in my cubby?"

"Uuum, I want to say yes. But I'd ask Dante. Speaking of which I need to talk to him before he leaves. I'll see you two later."

"Okay, bye Lincoln," Clarke answers.

Lexa says her own goodbye as Lincoln rushes out of the studio. Lexa walks over to where Clarke is still moving her paintings around and sits on Clarke's stool. Taking the second to last cookie from the box she says, "I think you can leave stuff here if you're coming back."

"Cool. Well then Lexa, do you want to do me a huge favor and help me take some of the smaller paintings back to my dorm?"

"Sure."

"Thank you," Clarke hands Lexa a painting, "Hey, is Anya coming to our group dinner tonight?"

"She said she was going to."

"Good," Clarke picks up her toolbox, and another painting, then starts walking out the door, "Is it just me or have Anya and Raven been acting weird around each other lately?"

"Weird?"

"Yeah. Like they really need to just bang each other OR they already did and now don't know what to do about it."

"Raven and Anya? Are you sure you've got the right people?"

"Positive."

"Anya hasn't said anything to me about it," Lexa mutters.

"Watch them at dinner. I bet you'll see it." Toolbox away, Clarke closes her locker. Snapping the lock in place. She shifts the painting in her arms while she starts walking down the hallway. Lexa follows her. "So, where are we going for dinner again?"

"The Café of Lights," Clarke wiggles her eyebrows.

"Did you pick that?" Lexa grins.

"I may have reminded everybody about the bomb ass dessert selection there."

"I'm sure you did," Lexa laughs.

"Besides, it's gotta be good luck for us to go there after our finals right? That's basically when you realized I'm the coolest person ever, am I right?" Clarke says playfully bumping shoulders with Lexa before they start walking down the stairs.

"I'll agree with good luck. Not so sure about coolest person ever," Lexa laughs, "If I remember correctly you were just as nervous as I was. We barely talked the first five minutes."

"Yeah, but after that. I showed you my bar trick!"

"Getting a coin in the cup was quiet impressive," Lexa teases.

"I thought so," Clarke puffs out her chest jokingly. She deflates and adds, "If you told me back then that we'd actually start dating, I'd probably have a heart attack."

"Same," Lexa opens the car door for Clarke, before taking her painting to put them both in the trunk.

"Think we're going to have any more classes together?"

"Hm…maybe. I'm done with my painting requirements though so probably not that."

"Good." Clarke turns on the radio after Lexa gets in the car.

"Good?" Lexa grins, pulling out of the parking space.

"Mmhm. Maybe in our next class you'll actually be bad at something so I can actually help you."

"You helped me build my canvases this semester."

"That's not good enough. You had to help me like every day in that dumb Photoshop class."

"True. But without it we wouldn't have started talking. So really it was a good thing." They stopped at a red light and before Clarke could get her response out Lexa kisses her gently. As she pulls back she say, "Now I get to kiss you everyday, and there's nothing else I'd ask for."

"Touché," Clarke replies with a slight blush on her face.