Chapter Ten:

Like I thought, the explaining took a lot longer than I had hoped. Who would have figured that Kirito was such a fiendish thing? Truly.

"Listen, I am Prince. Why don't you understand this?" Asuna tossed her head and glared at me. We had decided that it would be best to go home, being Asuna's home. I think that they didn't actually think I would follow them, but since Asuna had already invited me into her house, I had no issues entering. You see something they don't tell you in the show is that players can not enter private rooms or homes. At inns, they can listen through the door and such, but at residences once the door is shut, you can not hear or see anything. Unless you were invited in in the past. So me walking into Asuna's house should have been enough proof that I am Prince. But Asuna refused to admit it.

"I wouldn't have been able to enter your house if I wasn't." Ignored. Asuna picked up a knife and went to cut up the meat, but I grabbed her arm. I shall now tell you all a secret, I can cook. Nothing fancy like gourmet, but I can do home styled. My Evil Lego Ambassador of an aunt, ah it's been awhile since I last said that, never cooked me anything, so I always had to make my own food. And we all know I love food, so I taught myself how to cook things other than a PB&J when I was much much younger. Mostly because I wanted to eat food that looked like the stuff in anime and cooking shows.

"Let me do this. I can cook better than you without a doubt." She was about to retort, most likely to tell me how much of a moron I am and that there's no way I'm better than her, but I hip-butted her out of the way with a small grin.

"Seriously Asuna, calm your titties, and let me do one of my few physical talents. Well, actually there are a lot more than a few. I am a Jack of all traits, master of none after all." I hummed a tune, which shall remain nameless, and flipped the knife. It was a serrated bread knife. Serrated works well with cutting slimy meat, but the beefy looking thing in front of me had barely any fat in it. So I put that knife away, and pulled out a carving knife, that is literally what it is called. Hey, hold your horses. The only reason why I know what kitchen utensils are called is because Mrs. Landlord carved open my brain and dumped all her kitchen knowledge into it. I quickly set to work slicing the meat into thin strips, and then put that aside. Next I grabbed some Asuna's soy sauce, labeled soy sauce, a pineapple, believe it or not, some salt, garlic, cream, and chili. I mixed that together to make a hoisin sauce and then fried the meat strips in that. I chopped up leeks, placed it in with the meat, and then cooked up some linguini noodles. You put a tiny bit of oil in the pot before the water boils so that the noodles don't stick together. But too much oil and the noodles end up super gross. Talking from experience here. After everything was nice and cooked, I dished it out on three plates and then grinned. Kirito was drooling, but Asuna looked pissed as hell. She just can't handle my fab-ness.

"Thank you for the meal." I clapped my hands together, and then picked up my fork. Fully intent on eating the food I prepared, but the feeling of having eyes bore craters into my soul quickly destroyed my appetite. I slammed my silverware onto the table and stood up. I did the dramatic point the finger thing and huffed.

"Asuna! If you do not stop the sexual harassment I shall force a kiss upon those pitiful lips for a second time! I do not care if you haven't kissed Kirito yet. I will defile your body till not even Satan would want it! Do I make myself clear?" Both Asuna and Kirito were holding onto each other in terror. I sighed and then sank back into my chair. Before I left, I was the dramatically animated one. Doing all the poses, and the speeches, but now it looks like my place has been stolen by the two love birds in front of me. Sweet, another thing I am easily replaced in..

"I give up. I don't have the mentality to be able to convince rock-headed people like you of my identity. I'll leave then. Maybe Aki will accept me," I sniffed dramatically, and walked over to the door, somehow managing to bump into more things than seconds I have lived. I tossed the door open and leaped super dramatically out the door.

"At least, Aki loves me!" Just as I was about exit through the door, oh how I love that sexy door, Kirito grabbed ahold of my waist and we fell to the floor in a heap. I blinked my eyes open and was greeted by Kirito's dark gray ones. Talk about a reacquiring action. Kirito pulled away, and I tried to sit up which was difficult considering Kirito was straddling me. Now, let me explain in detail what happened next, and I am doing this because of a terrible trait I picked up while abroad. Pervertedness. I smoothed back some of my hair and placed my hand on Kirito's upper thigh. I leaned forward and tilted my head to the side.

"Kirito, you're not hurt are you?" He blinked a few times and he went pop. Like pop, sudden blushing.

"Ah, I-I'm fine." He gulped, and pulled away from me, but I caught his hips in my hands and pulled him back to my chest. I glanced over his shoulder to see an angry but shocked looking Asuna with a sword in her hands. I grinned at her and slipped my fingers under Kirito's shirt, to which he shivered.

"You're so cute, Kirito, like a frightened little rabbit." Secretly I was screaming at myself to stop before I went to far and got safe-zone killed by Asuna. Which is totally possible! I saw it happen to Klein by none other than Asuna.

"Hey Prince, let me go, okay?" I, stupidly I might add, ran a hand through Kirito's hair and gently kissed his neck, which caused another shiver. Asuna raised the blade above her head but then stopped. I quirked an eyebrow at her, and then gripped Kirito's blushing face in my other hand. Asuna turned away from us and then her shoulders sank. But being the total jackass that I am, I didn't notice this as her sign of defeat and continued to sexually harass Kirito. And then I kissed him. It seems like all my kisses will lead me to regrets, and nothing more. Kirito did the manly thing in this and fainted, and Asuna Mach-7 smashed the wall next to my head. I just grinned stupidly at her.

"Well, at least, we now know who's the dominate one in the relationship. Before it was sort of wishy-washy, but now we know that Kirito is just a boy toy." Asuna glared at me with tears dripping down her face and then dashed off into her bedroom. I stared after her in surprise before looking down at Kirito. He was mumbling something about two guys kissing being wrong and how he was taken by Asuna, and that there was no way he was leaving her. I tsked at him, if he was really that loyal to her, he better start showing it, because pretty soon his harem is going to grow another two. Well, one if I can help it. There is no way I'm letting Shion fall prey to this guy. And Leafa or whatever her name is, I should save her too. Kirito just isn't suited to real life. With a long, very tired sigh, I stood up and slowly dragged myself over to where Asuna was crying in her room to apologize. Of course I left Kirito all spazzed out on the floor, it's not like you can blame me or anything. He was asking for it! Last time I saw him he was complaining about me to Agil, and now he doesn't recognize me! I knocked on her door.

"I'm coming in." I opened the door to see the foolish girl crying her eyes out on her bed. I let out another sigh, also something I do more than I like. Like, seriously. Sighing, yawning, sweat dropping happens way-way too often. I walked over to her and sat down on the not squishy bed, and leaned back with my hands placed behind me.

"Listen Asuna, I know you love Kirito. And I know, for the most part, that Kirito loves you. And I know that you know that I'm Prince, but you're refusing to admit it because Kirito is attached to me. But it's not like he actually likes me, it's more out of obligation than anything else. And I don't care for Kirito like that, sure I acted like it once in awhile, but that was just joking around." She didn't stop crying, but I got the feeling that she understood. I sat up properly, and pulled her into a hug with my chin on her head. Having my fully grown body back was nice, not that it looked the same, but I was back to being manly and tall.

"I'm sorry that I'm so biased against you Asuna. It's just I don't particularly like how you treat Kirito." She tilted her head up and glared at me.

"I treat him like I love him!" I snorted and pushed her head back down.

"You act like the aggressive possessive older sister. You get angry over nothing, you flaunt your skills, which are beneath Kirito's, you treat him like a trophy boyfriend, and less like a lover. When Kirito is with you his badass personality disappears and he acts like a weak loser. It annoys me to no end. You should act how I do with Akihiko!" At this Asuna cried even harder than before, and managed to completely ignore that last sentence, thank all the deities out there. Wait, I'm practically a deity so what am I saying?

"But I love Kirito and all he talks about is you. Always Prince this Prince that." I smiled slightly at the thought of Kirito checking up on me in the middle of a romantic moment with Asuna.

"Kirito would go through hell for you, he wouldn't for me. Act more confident, but less aggressive, then I will give you my blessing." For the rest of that night, Asuna cried her heart, her insecurities, her feelings and just about every other thing out there dry. Needless to say, my shoulder was soaked to salty water and snot. I will have no qualms throwing that away, though. Honestly, I would say that Asuna and myself got much closer in our relationship, but I don't know if she will take my advice, or forget it. I do hope she takes it, otherwise I will have to kill her. Asuna ended up falling asleep on me actually, right in the middle of my amazing speech I might add. So I tucked her into her bed, and then went and got Kirito who had passed out from over thinking. After he was safely delivered to the stiff bed of Asuna, I went back into her dining room and cleaned everything up. Now, just to clarify, when I touch objects now, they have a real life-like properties. Like they don't go shatter, you actually have to clean stuff or make it, the weapons actually draw blood and so forth. After I finished that small task, I left Asuna's house and just walked. It had been such a long time since I just got to walk around without worrying about something. I didn't have to worry about pineapples, or aliens, or being stuck in a video game. I was free from intelligence for the rest of that night. But of course, nothing good ever lasts. That and I have the worst luck. I had somehow wandered back into Akihiko's waiting arms, which were incredibly warm and comfy. Why do I think this you ask? I have no bleeping idea. Anyway, I found myself strolling down the halls of the what's it called guild and then bumped into Akihiko. Who just so happened to be the same height, if not a few inches taller than me, although I would bet my left kidney that I still look like a girl next to him. Not like that would be a bad thing with him, just saying. He's not the kind of person to be overly manly in public.

"Well well well, I was beginning to think you had died." I, for the first time ever, snarled at him. How could he give up on me so fast? Speaking of fast, talk about my heart's erratic beating, so not a good side. But can you honestly blame me? Akihiko is like, the once in a lifetime friend you'd go gay for at the slightest sign. Plus it's been so long since I last saw him and we all know that I have gotten rather attached to the man. Although, personally, I think the real reason as to my dramatic heart beat was because of where we were in the story. Almost to the end, which means no Akihiko anymore. Wait, what am I thinking? I can just bring him back to life. Go me.

"Like I would just die off, you forget who you're talking to." He smirked at me, and slipped an arm around my waist. I am a man now, so if it was anything other than friendly I'm afraid I might die.

"Of course, how could I forget that I am with the amazing alien." I humphed but then slapped my hands together in moderate shock.

"That's right! I haven't told you what happened yet!" Akihiko raised an eyebrow at me curiously.

"I've actually been meaning to speak with you, Prince. Come with me." He turned on his heel and walked off towards the private quarters. I stared after him for a few moments and then pushed my body into a jog to catch up with him. The damn man had such long legs, it was like a penguin walking around with a giraffe. Me being the giraffe, heh heh, yeah um. Moving onwards. Akihiko slowed down a little bit after watching me struggle, and then stopped at a door. I hadn't even caught up to him at that point. But no, he just stops. 'Oh it's okay Ted, I'll flaunt my height around you, don't worry you fucking gremlin pop-tart.' Which doesn't even make sense since we were like, the same bleeping height now, like what the fudge ducks Aki? You got legs that stretch when you walk?, Nah, just leave the fucking gremlin poptart, strawberry flavor, by the by. I ran straight into Akihiko's back. Mother of apples, I literally just called myself a fucking gremlin pop-tart in my head. Twice. Alas, I had not the chance to rethink my thoughts, for Akihiko, the bain of my manhood, grabbed my arm and pulled me into the room. Then I slapped myself.

"No Ted, bad. What is with my brain right now? I don't see Aki for a few weeks and suddenly I'm like this?"

"Prince, I am right here." I ignored this and continued talking to myself like the idiot that I am.

"It doesn't matter, just slow down evil Ted." I tossed my hands into the air in frustration. "Breath, just breath. Now, let's backtrack so I can filter out these emotions. We all know that I liked Akihiko Kayaba before this all happened, as in me dying. Then after I met him in that inn, we not only got along better than I had with anyone else, I also told him things that I never told anyone, as in Kirito. I grow attached to the man over the course of who give a shit how long, seriously I don't remember, and then I just disappear for several weeks and don't get to see him. Like damn, of course, while all this was happening I thought I was in love with someone, who turned out to be my younger self. Why don't I remember that happening, though? I must have erased his memory without knowing. Wait, I actually remember erasing my memories, so why and I asking myself this? Humm, if I was to be honest with myself, I'd say that the feelings I developed for myself were just misguided emotions which should have been directed elsewhere. But now that I am free from that stupid thought, my feelings are all over the place, yes that must be it." I was interrupted, very rudely I might add, by a voice in my ear.

"Although I am fascinated to see where this leads, we have important matters to discuss." I nearly jumped out of my skin.

"What the Cruickshank Aki!?" He merely smiled at me and waved at a small table with chairs.

"Take a seat please." I tsked to hide my embarrassment and sat down with a thump.

"Do you want to go first, or shall I?" He smiled again and remained silent. Jerk, how could this happen to me? Oh wait, I can just wipe it from history, yes to over powered characters.

"Okay, so I found out what I really am. Apparently there are five planets including Earth, and I'm from the oldest, which houses the most powerful beings around. Which is pretty rad, but I am half human. This explains why I only just awoke to my abilities, but basically, I'm outside of all laws! And I totally left this game for three weeks, although it only seemed like a day to you guys. My body changed to my 'Invion' version, so yeah. I don't know this just seems weird now. To cut the story short, I'm half alien, and I have unstoppable powers. They literally can do anything, unless I make a contract. Something about after we make a contract, we have to keep it till the day we die. Which is like, never. So yeah." Akihiko sighed and rubbed his temples.

"You would make a very terrible informant. That is interesting though, and it ties into what I had wanted to say to you." He rubbed the bridge of his nose and let out another sigh, this one deeper and slightly depressed.

"I am afraid that Kirito and Asuna will be wanting to leave the guild soon, and that Kirito will discover our secret." My inner self-started the fangirl dance. 'He said our secret~' Shut up pervert Ted.

"I am going to reveal the floor boss's room in a week's time.I believe that Kirito will uncover my identity then." Here he paused to stare at me sternly.

"Ted, I would be very grateful if you would remain out of this fight." I crossed my arms and frowned.

"Yeah I understand. Is that it?" He smiled kindly at me.

"Were you hoping for something else?" I rolled my eyes and tried not to start pitching a hissy fit. That would just play into his demonic idea, never trust men with long hair. They are always planning something, wait…..That includes me, and we all know I am far too much of a benevolent guy to do something like plan everyone's imminent demise. Aki sighed, and then ran a hand through said long hair. I followed his movements and then slapped my hands on the table as it acquired to me.

"You lousy little piece of shit. You're planning on dying aren't you?" I glared at him as he shrugged. The damned bastard was going to die, I had forgotten that. In the end of the middle of the first season, when everyone escapes SAO, Akihiko Kayaba dies somehow or another. Like I would allow that to happen. Aki stood from his seat, and gently placed his hands on my shoulders with a smile.

"You know Ted, if you were a woman, I think that I would have fallen in love with you." I raised my eyebrows in surprise. Sooooo many things I could say.

"So," Akihiko placed a hand over my mouth at lightning speed and shook his head.

"Although you are the only friend I have had in awhile, I do not trust the words you were about to speak. Just please, don't make this moment awkward." I frowned at him and then sighed through his hand.

"Might Isefwe fhshre hfemmpt." Before Aki could ask me what I had said, which trust me on this, it was good. There was a loud knock on the door, and Torig, was that his name? The secretary guy who asked me to marry him, I should do something to him before I forget…. Yeah, well that guy was at the door with a stern expression.

"Sir, Kirito, and Asuna wish to speak to you and the council. The others have already been called." I slipped my arms around Aki's waist. To the innocent bystander, it looked like we were embracing. I pulled away and playfully smacked Aki's shoulder, with enough force to damage his HP if we weren't in a safe zone, and giggled.

"Oh Aki, you goof, I thought you said that I get you for the whole evening~" He rubbed his shoulder, even though we can't feel pain in this damned game, and glared at me. Ouch, didn't think his glare power would be on so high after such a childish prank. Torig blushed, and looked away from us with a small frown. Obviously, he did not recognize me. Well, now that I'm in my true glory, darkened skin, longer white hair, extremely pale eyes that look gray and not blue anymore, a more manly (fu fu fu) body, and I'm taller, woot! It's no surprise that Torig didn't realize who I am. In fact, the guy that I stayed with since arriving didn't know who I was.

"Aki, before you go, how did you know it was me?" Aki smirked at me, and then brushed past me to the door. Before be could leave, I raced after him. Hah! Didn't think that I would stay did you? That's lame! I can chase after whoever I want, plus there is no reason for me to stand there dramatically while Akihiko escapes with my information, also dramatically. I do like that word you know, it can mean so many things. Drama queen types, the dramatic flip of the cape, the dramatic flip of the hair which means something entirely different, it gives words a whole new meaning and definition. I do love words, they are so pretty, and you can weave them however you wish. Ahem, off track, again…

"You better tell me or so help me I will go NPC on your ass." The leader of the guild, I keep forgetting the name, don't blame me! Ahem, cough, the leader of the guild glanced down at me, the smirk still there, but kept walking at a very fast pace. Even at my new height, I was having trouble keeping up with him. Poor Torig was practically sprinting after us.

"NPC? I don't see how that could be an insult or a threat." I raised an eyebrow at him and grabbed onto his arm so I wouldn't have such a hard time keeping up.

"Obviously, you have never read ½ Prince. Where do you think I got my name?" Aki stopped at the doors to the meeting room, and then placed one hand on the doorknobs.

"I thought you got it from your last name?" I shrugged my shoulders at him and pushed one of the doors open as he opened the other.

"Nah, that was just a plus." He chuckled and walked over to his seat while I stayed in my spot. Kirito and Asuna were already there and were even holding hands. Ew. I glanced out the windows. Seems like I had been wondering around all night without even realising it. Wait does that mean I skipped breakfast? Ah hell nah! My poor breakfast baby…..

"Hey, don't think you can get out of this, Aki. I will seriously go NPC on you, and since I am the ultimate being, you won't be able to stop me." He chuckled loudly this time, and Kirito glanced at me confused. The little black swordsman cleared his throat in an attempt to capture our attention, but it didn't work. Haha, it never works when I'm around! …. Ignore that rather narcissistic sentence.

"Will you let me deal with this first, at least?" I snickered, and then placed my hands on my hips.

"Hah! You kid yourself, mister. The answer, or I shall sit on you while going NPC on you." The fact that he didn't get the NPC reference just made it all the more beautiful. He sighed, although there was a small smile on his face, and patted the table next to him. I glanced around the room, silently taking in the fact that we were completely ignoring everyone else, and walked towards Aki, and then sitting on the edge of the long table in front of him. My back was to him, so I turned my upper torso to look at him, and then jumped. Aki had leaned forward to the point where we would have kissed if I was shorter.

"It was, well firstly, the expression on your face. Everyone else here is so worn from trying to leave, or figuring out how to live here. But you don't seem to care at all. Your face is always so carefree. Second, no one else would ever come tearing down the hall at a breakneck speed at me. Third, no one else would ever look like you in real life, have you seen yourself, Prince?" I shrugged my shoulders again and shot a glare at the lovers in front of me. Humph, so I have a singularly unique personality that's impossible to not recognize, and yet, yet the two lover birds in front of me failed to do so. Hmm, the game is afoot…. Or however Sherlock said it. Do they even have Sherlock in this time? Holy shit, I forgot that I am in a totally different time! What if they don't have pizza anymore? Would they still have junk food right? It's only been ten years or so. Would everything be the same?

"Prince, now that I have answered your question, may we get on with this meeting?" I pulled myself from my thoughts, and stared at Akihiko. After a few seconds, I nodded my head in a bored manner, and sauntered over to Kirito. I gave him a pat on his shoulder, and looked at him from the corner of my eye as I passed to the door. Kirito had an expression on his face, one that has always stayed with me. It's one that I honestly never thought I would see pointed in my direction. He looked betrayed. It hurt me to see Kirito like that, and it didn't even make sense to me for the longest time. Actually none of this has ever made sense to me. Only weeks ago I was living a normal life, going about my day without a single care to the world. Then I die, end up in not only a different dimension, but also a videogame, meet the main character and become best friends with him. Find out I'm an alien, become best friends with the main villain, get dumped by hero best friend for some girl, meet my dad, go to my dad's world, then come back and it's like BAM! Not that it wasn't like BAM before, but now it's even worse. Sometimes I wonder if this is all but I dream I'm having.

I let out a quiet sigh before leaving the room. I didn't look back as I walked down the halls, nor did I speak to Bach when he started following me about. Well, at first. I mean, it's Bach. We went through everything together, well no but still. It's Bach, and I have been so mean to him lately.

"Okay, what do you want?" Ooh, not the best way to start.

"Are you really Prince? The little dorky kid?" I rolled my eyes at him like a mature adult, well more like gasped in shock and horror, and then grasped at my heartless chest.

"Little dorky kid? Did you just, I can't even. You know, I thought about hanging out with you, talking about my powers and shit, but no." Bach glanced around nervously, and then placed his hands on my shoulders. Whoa, I'm taller than Bach….. I'm- I'm taller than Bach! I'm taller than Bach!

"Ted, listen. About your powers….." He sighed loudly. He looked worn, tired.

"Let me guess, your planet wants to use me as a weapon to defeat your enemies, and they're going to try and guilt trip me into it by saying they gave me another chance at life." He raised his eyebrows in surprise.

" 's it exactly. Being half human, you can break contracts. Well, that's what I've been told. As long as you don't use any Invion powers, the contracts don't apply to your human genes. You are literally the perfect weapon." I laughed, and patted his shoulder.

"Don't worry Bach. I don't owe them anything, I was an innocent casualty, although I didn't exactly die since I can't die. So they really can't make me do anything." Bach's expression didn't change though. I frowned down at him, have to get used to that.

"Listen, Bach, my dad taught me everything I need to know. Well, the basics that I needed to know. I sort of got the hang of it all now, and it's totally cool. I might not be the strongest of my race, but I can keep myself from being brainwashed by a power hungry empire. I really don't feel like I owe you guys anything, and I couldn't care less about this war." Bach's shoulders sagged, and he glanced around one last time. When he looked back up at me, I just sort of feel apart inside. Before I left, Bach was like a stone wall to me. He was unbeatable, in a way, and I felt like I could always rely on him for something. But this Bach looked so defeated. He forced a smile on his face, and clapped my upper arm in an attempt to cheer me up, or more likely, cheer himself up.

"I'm proud of you, Ted. You've really changed over your time here, and I couldn't have done better myself. Unfortunately I have to return to my home, they revoked my punishment and they want me on the front lines. They said if I can't convince you to join, then I am to kill you….. but, we both know that's not possible." I puffed my cheeks out and crossed my arms as I thought.

"What if you tell them that you killed me while I was sleeping, and so caught me unaware? The game is almost over, I mean Kirito knows that Heathcliff is really Akihiko Kayaba already, so this world should end soon. I could, you know, fake my death. Change my appearance a bit, get rid of this hair. Then you'll be all good." He forced another smile on his face, and took a step back from me. I felt compelled to ask if I smelled or something, but my smarter side smacked me upside the head.

"Thanks Ted, I really am thankful. I guess this is the last time I'll see you?" I grinned back at him.

"Yup, have fun storming the castle!" He deflated some more, and I got a strong feeling I screwed something up.

"Ted, I uh.. I want to tell you something before I go, but you have to promise me that out will never, for as long as you live or are remembered that you will never meet, seek out, or communicate with anyone outside the Invion and Human races." I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Alright, I promise." This time when Bach smile, it was real. But I knew right away that something wasn't right.

"Ted, Theodore Valiant Prince, I am in love with you." And with that, Bach disappeared from my life with a sudden light and the soft smell of honey and coffee.

A/N: Here is chapter ten, as I said in the special these chapters are horrible and I am truly sorry. Please bare with me till the end.