A/N: I've taken far too long to update this story, but for the first time in quite a while I'm actually having a life, but I promise to update all of my stories more frequently. I have two more stories in the works at the moment, one of which is a babyfic *crosses fingers* Enjoy!

~oOo~

"Pancakes have arrived!" Andy announces happily the next morning, an IHOP bag held high above his head, "Good morning!"

"Morning." I smile, "Thank you. Where's Rusty?"

"He's in the other wing." Andy leans in and kisses my cheek, lingering for a moment, our faces close enough to feel one another's breath, "He wanted to meet other kids like him, help them learn to cope."

"He'll come down later though, won't he?" I question, getting lost in his mahogany eyes.

"He will. How are you feeling?" He asks, his face still inches away from mine as he reaches up and runs a hand through my hair.

God, did he hear what I said last night? Or is this him just being worried?

"Really tired." I admit, pursing my lips in a sad attempt to smile, "What about you?"

What about you? Sharon, what kind of a question is that? You love him and he's this close to you, just kiss him!

"I stayed with Rusty last night." His hand drops from my face down to the bag of pancakes, "I asked for strawberries on top, is that okay?" He opens the bag and pulls out a plastic container, fork, and a coffee, smiling brightly.

"You stayed with Rusty?" I question, sipping my coffee as he sits in the chair beside my bed, "Andy that's-"

"Don't worry about it." He reaches out and squeezes my free hand, "You know, those pancakes will be cold pretty soon."

"Oh, yeah." I shake my head and laugh lightly as I open the container, "Do you want some?"

"No, it's okay." He waves me off, "You need to eat."

"So do you." I reply through a mouthful of amazing pancakes, "How did you know I like strawberries on them?"

"Lucky guess." He shrugs as I continue eating, "So I suppose you'll want me to update you if we get any cases?"

"Please." I divert my eyes to the container of pancakes, his eyes fixed intently on me, "And I'll need to call Emily and Ricky later."

"Rusty already did." He says slowly, almost as if he's embarassed to tell me, "That was the first thing he did after I brought him to the condo."

"I can't believe they didn't book a flight and call me right away." I shake my head, a smile tugging at my lips. I can feel myself getting stronger, and that along with Andy's presence is lifting my spirits.

"I kinda told him to tell them to give you a few days, just until you were on your feet again." He looks away, his gaze fixating on the bedside lamp, "I didn't want them interrupting your rest."

"Wow, Andy, that's," I take a sip of coffe as I try to organize my thoughts, "that's really sweet, thank you for doing that. And for taking care of Rusty last night and the pancakes and-"

"I told you not to worry about it." He smiles, reaching out to squeeze my hand again, "I did all of that because I wanted to, I promise."

"But you have your life too and the last thing you need is to be taking care of me because I'm too stubborn to do it myself." I realize that I'm pouting and quickly smile at him, "And it doesn't matter that you wanted to, I'm not your responsibility and neither is Rusty."

"And Rusty wasn't your responsibility at one point either." He counters, a sly smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth, "What's your point?"

"I can take care of myself." I shoot stubbornly, closing the pancake container and placing it back in the paper bag, "You can have the leftovers if you want."

"You need to eat." He protests, taking the container back out of the bag and opening it again, "All of it."

"It's a lot of food!" I whine, forcing myself to take another bite, "If I eat so much that I get sick Andy, I swear-" My threat is interrupted by Andy's phone ringing.

"Yeah, what's up?" I can hear Provenza grumbling on the other end of the line and suppress a laugh when Andy rolls his eyes, "Yeah, okay I'll be there in a few." He hangs up the phone and looks at me sadly, "I have to go, duty calls."

"Duty calls." I repeat as he leans in, pressing a chaste kiss to the corner of my mouth, "Call me later, please?"

"I will." He nods before kissing me again, this time on the lips, "Rusty should be down in a little while, eat your pancakes, get some rest, and make sure you check in with Ricky and Em, okay?"

"I'll make sure of it. Thank you." I offer a small smile as he leaves the cramped room, trying to wrap my mind around the exchange that had just occurred.

~oOo~

Standing at the edge of the water, a gently breeze twirling my hair, I can't help but feel at peace. It's almost picturesque, the high tide and the waves reflecting the sunlight in shades of orange, pink, and purple, a flock of Pelicans diving in and out of the water. The waves gently lap at my ankles, the frothy bubbles clinging to my feet before slowly fizzling out.

Something on the horizon catches my eye, a dolphin or a fish maybe? Whatever it is, it's splashing frantically, the breaking waves tossing it around like a rag doll.

"Sharon!" A voice calls and I spin around quickly, scanning the dunes for the sound of the voice, "Sharon!"

"Where are you?" I yell, craning my neck, still unable to locate the voice, "Hello?"

"Sharon, help!" The voice suddenly comes into focus and I realize... No! It's Andy! I run out into the ocean, trying my hardest to get to him.

"Andy?!" I scream frantically as a wave knocks me down, my glasses flying off, "Andy!" I can almost reach him, "Andy hold on!"

"Sharon!" He manages to cough out one more time before the waves take him under.

"No!" I dive into the waves, the salty ocean water burning my eyes. I have to find him. Grabbing around frantically, I can't see anything. Coming up for a breath of air, I dive back down again. Calling his name under the water, I'm met by nothing but the sound of the ocean. He is gone.

~oOo~

"Sharon, Sharon wake up." I feel a gentle tug on my arm and my eyes fly open, a worried looking Rusty there to greet me, "Are you okay?"

"Honey I'm fine." I rub my eyes and push myself up in the bed, "It was just a bad dream, that's all. How was your morning? Andy said you were trying to meet other kids like you?"

"Well, sorta." He shrugs, "I've come to terms with the idea of my death. Some of them haven't, and because they haven't, they aren't trying to live while they still can. I'm trying to do everything I possibly can before something happens."

There he goes again, always the hero.

"You're going to pull through this, you hear me?" I argue, the oncoming tears evident in the sound of my voice, "You will."

"But if I don't, I mean, like, I've accepted that. And I want to spend whatever I have left helping other people."

"I'm so proud of you, Rusty." I reach out and grab his hand, "You've grown into such a brave, strong young man, and I'm grateful every day to call myself your mother."

He glances at me for a moment, his eyes reddening, "And I'm grateful to call myself your son. Now enough with the mushy stuff, okay? You need to call Emily and Ricky. Lieutenant Flynn told me to remind you."

"Of course he did." I roll my eyes and let out a light laugh, "Thank you for reminding me."

"No problem." He hands me my phone, "I'll give you a few minutes."

"No, no." I shake my head, unlocking my phone and dialing Ricky and Emily, "You can stay."

"Are you sure?" He looks at me hesitantly.

"Yes I'm sure." I smile, "Why wouldn't I let you?"

"Mom?" Ricky's voice interrupts me, "Mom, how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine sweetie." I grin, "I'm fine, honestly. Both of you are worrying too much."

"Not according to Little Brother and the Lieutenant." Emily chimes in. Rusty looks away guiltily and I reach over to pat his arm, "You need to take care of yourself Mom, or we'll come out there and do it for you."

"Yeah Mom, we will." Ricky threatens, "Little Brother needs you, you've gotta keep yourself strong for him."

"And you need to take care of yourself for you, Mom. Don't listen to Ricky." She laughs.

"No, don't listen to Emily." He shoots back, and I can't help but smile.

"I'll listen to both of you." I grin to myself, "You're both right."

"Mom, we can't both be right!" Ricky argues jokingly, "You know I'm the one who's actually right!"

"You're both right!" I laugh, "Sometimes I forget that you two are in your twenties. You argue like you did when you were kids!"

"And that's why you love us." Emily sings happily, "You can't deny it."

"You're right Em, I can't." I shake my head, "How long do you two have to talk?"

"I'm almost out of time." Ricky sighs, "I'm going to get a haircut."

"That'll make Rusty happy." I laugh, the boy in question looking at me confusedly, "What about you, Emily?"

"I've got all day." She answers, "We don't have rehersal today, so I'm just relaxing. But I do have some questions for you." She states, a mysterious tone to her voice.

"Like what?"

"Like what about Lieutenant Flynn?" She giggles, "He seemed really worried about you and he was taking care of Rusty and..."

"We're just friends." At least I think... I mean I love him but... We're not talking about that right now.

"Sure." She replies, disbelief in her voice, "So have you kissed yet?"

"Emily!" I feel the blush starting to burn my cheeks and I shake my head embarrassed.

"I... Need to... Go." Ricky says awkwardly, "I'll call again soon Mom."

"Bye Ricky, I love you." I smile as his line goes dead.

"So Mom, have you?" Emily questions again, "Because if Little Brother knows something, it's only a matter of time before Ricky and I find out."

"Not exactly." I admit quietly, "And even if we did, that's a part of my life I'm not comfortable sharing with you." Rusty glances over at me for a moment and shakes his head, standing up and quietly leaving the room.

"So you have?!" She exclaims, "Go Mom!"

"Emily Anne Raydor, stop it!" I laugh, reaching up to cover my mouth.

"Oh okay." She sighs, "But one more question, was it a good kiss?"

"We are not having this conversation!" I can feel my cheeks burning even hotter now, "Goodbye Em. I love you."

"Love you too Mom, say hi to Little Brother and your boyfriend for me!"

"He's not my boyfriend!" I argue.

"Sure he isn't." She laughs before hanging up.

~oOo~

Was Emily right? Were Andy and I slowly falling into a domestic routine? The closeness we had developed these past few months was undeniable, but doing this with him, now, it wasn't right. His lips grazing mine and the warmth of his hands felt so right though, and when he slept aside of me, his arms wrapped protectively around my waist, I felt safe. All I had ever wanted was to feel safe and secure, but a portion of that had always come with the knowledge that I was the Ice Queen, the cold-hearted FID bitch, and Darth Raydor. Those facades barely made an appearance recently, as for the first time in nearly twenty years, I was able to be Sharon. Sharon, who burrowed her feelings deep enough for no one to find. Sharon, who sat crying on the floor of her office in the middle of the night, riddled with anxiety and panic. Sharon, who whispered her deepest emotions as the man that she loves took her dying son home for the night. Sharon- who had fallen in love with the most unlikely of men, Andy Flynn.

The ringing of my phone startled me, and I barely managed to stifle the surprised squeak that threatened to escape my throat.

"Duty calls." Andy greets me, "How are you doing?"

I shake my head and smile, never in a million years had I expected Andy to worry like a mother hen, "I'm still tired but so much better. I'm going stir crazy in here though, I would much rather be at a crime scene, and you know how much I love them." I quip sarcastically.

"Trust me, bed rest is much better than our scene." He sighs.

"Oh," I breathe out, twirling the ends of my hair nervously, "It wasn't... Was it...?" I manage to mumble, unable to finish the sentence.

"It wasn't a kid, thank God." He lets out a deep breath, "But decapitation by machete isn't exactly aesthetically pleasing."

"Taylor's going to have my ass for this, isn't he?" I grumble, reaching for the remote for the bed and sitting myself up in a more comfortable position, "There's a maniac running around the city with a machete. Great."

"If you're that worried about being decapitated while you sleep, I could stay and protect you." He coughs, "If you want me to, that is."

I let out a light laugh and roll my eyes, "I highly doubt anyone is coming here to decapitate me."

"Oh, uhm, okay, I never asked then." He mumbles sheepishly.

"I never said I didn't want you to stay and protect me." I smirk victoriously, glad to finally have been able to put him at a loss for words, "I'd love it if you stayed with me tonight."

"Provenza's gonna kill me, you know that, right?" He jokes.

"Hopefully not with a machete." I laugh, "I've heard that's not much fun to look at."

"I never thought I'd see the day you joked about a murder. You really are going crazy, aren't you?"

"I told you so." I grin happily, "And Andy,"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for being there for Rusty and me. It means a lot."

"Don't worry about it. I told you you didn't need to worry about it."

"Doesn't mean I won't." I quip, "I'll see you later." I smile before hanging up the phone.