Disclaimer: I own it all! Everything, everything its mine MWAHAHAHAHA. Nah kiddin' it belongs to DC. But the plot it's of my invention, as you can guess, because well, you are in no? is what we do here. Anyhow, lights, camera, ACTION!

Capter 3: THE PLAN AND THE PLOT (and a verry angry clown)

He was ready for some mayhem. Cramped up in that aseptic asylum would drive everyone nuts! He already was nuts but whatever. With Harley gone he was left to his own devises and that was never good… to other people, for him it was fantastic. First that brilliant mind of his had thought of the way for getting up his inventory without it being blown by bats. He had to work on that but first he needed to find a place. He couldn't use the narrows, bat had the whole zone wired, he knew that because he once tried to wire it himself, what a nice surprise to find the B-man had already done so… and they say great minds think alike… so maybe something further south, by Gotham's City Stadium. He called Robert's Rogue RealStates and put an order. If batman knew how the some people had honest business partnerships with his Rogue's Gallery he would be surprised, well as honest as they could. They didn't pay taxes, or anything, and the things they sold weren't too honest some times. But they had books and everyone paid their pretty penny, so yah maybe batman wouldn't be too happy about that. That was the problem with batman if you asked him "he needs to smile more. I try time and time again to make him smile, even a little but he's just the brooding-self-sacrificing-tormented-hero-type" the place would really delay his planning but the guys at Robert's were fast, only a couple of days, so now the next problem. How to get all his toys out of the warehouses without the bat and his bat brats spotting them and him "I guess I could use public transportation, The-HeHe, but not school busses, he already did that once. Not funny is the joke was told twice. Maybe garbage trucks, or regular busses, or oh! Got it! Armored trucks" he could get those pretty easily and he'll even get them back when he's done. They won't even know they were stolen HAHA. Yes, yes. Now time for a break.

"Hello Boss" said smiley, it truly was a sarcastic nickname for the henchman was as serious as batman, well not quite as batman. But close. He was the only henchman he trusted with his moll. Not because of his lack of sense of humor, but because he was an ex-marine and a killing machine. He lost his mother and saw the killer rape her lifeless body when he was 12, so he liked to fuck men, men who raped women. Joker liked to hire fucked up guys to work for him, but he trusted none around Harley, Rocco being the other one he trusted the most, sure he was married and had a little girl of his own but he was a straight male so he watch him. But not smiley.

"Where is she?" he trusted Harley, but he liked to know what she did when she thought he wasn't watching. He popped some Oreo's as he went to the mini-bar to get some pop.

"I left her and Miss Isley at the mall over square plaza, disguised as civilians, sir" she was with the plant again so soon? Urgh. But, wait a second, at the mall? Disguised? HAHAHA what a gag! She never failed to entertain him. The mere mental image of Harley dragging around the Weed Lady in costumes was too much and he chuckled out loud.

"good, bring her home save Smiley" he managed to catch the man's "Yessir" before he hanged off.

So they had an interesting day so far, no doubt the dumb blonde would tell him everything. He cacht up with some e-mails and played some PlayStation before going over the Hench's quarters and sending some to get started on the surveillance of the trucks. Calling his tech guys and giving them instructions and sending the rookies for some Chinese take-out. When everything was settled he started thinking about the next big job, he wasn't going bankrupt over the move, but he was putting a pretty penny and also he needed the publicity. So a bank it was but maybe a little old a little tired… "Then why not Gotham's stock exchange…" oh thank you brain, you never disappoint my genius criminal mind it was big, more than big. It would take weeks of planning, even a month, and I'll need the tech guys more, maybe even some new ones.

"I can already imagine, my face plastered in all the monitors, my laugh echoing everywhere. They thought their money is safe because its al cero's and one's but when it all disappears and no way to track them oh it will be glorious. Bet a lot would even take their lives, well no fun if I don't pull the trigger or stab them but this is work and not fun. Not too many at least…" a wide grin crept up in his face, showing his platinum embellished smile and slowly a maniac laugh started to sound. Giving chills to every henchman that could hear it; it meant something other than terror to all of them: they got work. Or someone was out of work.

Joker was a very happy man, oh he was. All was coming along swimmingly in the first stages of planning. He never shared those plans and everybody knew better than to ask. He was eating some kung-pow chicken when he got a call from Smiley.

"Uh… Boss…" he heard from the line.

"What!" he snapped with his mouth full of noodles, he didn't like when people interrupted his self-congratulation.

"Uh... There has being a development Sir."

"What kind of development? Get to the point would you!" people could be so frustrating, he didn't care if they wanted to go to the salon, of they got arrested. Harley knew how to take care of herself most of the time. There he said it. And if she was sent to Arkahm then she got what she was coming to her. He would break her out, eventually… if he needed her.

"Miss Ivy and Miss Quinn, instructed me to go to the diamond district and before the got out of the car Miss Isley said I was the "getaway driver" they pull out some masks and guns and went inside the shop it's been… 2.5 minutes Sir!" THEY WERE ROBBING A STORE!? Oh he was mad now…

"If the aren't there at the 6 minutes mark you go" his voice was eerie calm, and Smiley knew that was the no-nonsense voice so he didn't argue. One was with the joker as long as he was and not learns a few tricks about the Boss.

"Ok Sir, 6 minutes Sir" Joker was tempted to throw the phone to the wall.

"Who does she think she is? Going around improvising AND WITH THE READHEAD FROM HELL TOO! She is associated to my name, she is mine. She is dead when she comes home. Dead"

He turned up the T.V and tuned in the local news station, eyes glued to the screen as he waited, five minutes, ten minutes, and finally when he was starting to lose his patience after fifteen minutes the put the latest news report.

"This is nick strongman for channel 4, at the scene of the crime where to robbers made a heist of approximately 2.5 million dollars' worth of diamonds. The two women haven't been identified as of yet, but according to witnesses the one was approximately 2.5 and a brunette and the second 5.4 and with short black hair, they had what appeared to be masks to conceal their identities and not confirmed but rumors said they were batman's and robin's masks, thanks Richard and we are back to the studio…"

HAHAHAAHA…. Masks? They wore masks and wigs? He didn't thought this little harlequin had it in her, of course she knew better than to show her face in public without him. And 2.5 million? Fweee, not bad for a play-date with the plant. Still she was getting some talk down when she got here. Just for good measure.

"PUDDIN' GUESS WHAT RED AND I DID TODAY!" he heard Harley screaming downstairs.

"Oh I think I have an idea doll face" he murmured darkly snapping his neck. A little discipline and all would be well again.

AN: Sooooo…. It starts to get darker, joker is dark, and it's crazy. Here we get to see a "domestic" side of the King and Quinn of Gotham. I won't sugar coat it. They DO have an abusive relationship. Joker beats Harley. Harley beats joker. But I like to think that in their own twisted way they love each other. And this chapter was pain in the backside. Joker is hard to write. And the plans won't do justice to his plans so let's just all pretend this is actually a good plan and bear with me, and my typos. I want you all to know that there will be some things in the future. Write as I update so I have nothing ready but have an idea of what I want: 1) bad-morally-ambiguous batman 2) marriage talk 3) accidental pregnancy aaaand 4)a cool Two-face that blows Pam's Mind. That's it for now. Don't forget to leave a review please (thanks to the ones that have already, you put a smile on my face) I know you are out there I can see you, quite literally I can see you reading and not reviewing and it breaks my little hart. But now good bye lovelies.

MadFoy.