RACHEL'S POV

I wake up and I remember exactly where I am. I would've been surprised if I didn't spend a month in this room, in this spot. I know Noah and surprisingly Santana are worried about me, but today I can't go to school. I need to stay here, especially after Matthew's episode last night. Matthew. I sigh and look at the bed. It seems so wrong to see him like this, mostly because he is so full of life, always breaking any tension, making any of us feel better. The only friends he ever had was our group. I mean, there are a lot of us, but like me, Matthew didn't really click with anyone else. I knew last night that I wouldn't be going to school. I couldn't. It's also safer for me in here. By that I mean here I'm not as tempted to hurt myself. At school it sucks, but it doesn't affect me as much as Ari did yesterday. Some of my favorite memories are of Roo and I. You might think that we were in love or something. That's not the case with us. It's more of a family relationship between us. That's another thing that makes it worse. We fought, and it's all my fault for not listening to him.

~Flashback~

We were hanging out at the sports center that was across the street from the IDA. I walked up when Matt was talking to a couple guys I didn't know.

"All I hear is Rachel this, Rachel that. It's starting to get annoying." I could tell Matt was rolling his eyes.

Is he talking about me? He's my best friend, he wouldn't. Would he?

"Can't be that bad." One of the guys says. Who even are these people.

"Well it is. If I hear one more word all about her, I swear I'm going to explode."

"Nice to know. I guess I won't comment on myself anymore." I said, making my presence known. All three boys jump up and Matt spins around.

"Rachel! I wasn't talking about you!" He tried to plead with me, but his eyes were nervously jumping around, like they do when he's lying.

"Don't lie to me Matt! I trusted you! We've been friends forever! You're talking about me behind my back? Low, Matt. Real low." I run away, tears clouding my vision. I sprint across the street without looking.

Matt followed, but he wasn't as lucky. A car hit him and he flew back. When I saw him, I forgot all about everything that had just happened. I raced toward him. There was only one thought running through my head.

It's all my fault.

~End Flashback~

He's been in a coma ever since. Not many people know this, but my worst fear is that either he won't wake up, or that when he does, he's not going to want to see me, because it's all my fault.

MATTHEW'S POV (Who was expecting that ;P)

For the past few months, it's been an out-of-body experience. I watched everything. What didn't surprise me at all was Rachel's dedication to seeing me. What did shock me is the fact she blamed herself. I didn't look both ways before running. It's my fault, not her's. I just wish she wasn't so stubborn all the time. I wasn't even talking about her! I was talking about Gerald and Charles. They're always going on and on about her, and I was a bit annoyed. I kind of exploded on them. In true Rachel fashion, she comes at just the right moment. Years at McKinley have made her feel insignificant. Like everyone hates her.

That's not even close to the truth. However, we do only have a family relationship. And before you ask that's all either of us want. I just wish I could wake up and stop her from worrying. I almost did last night, and that's what that whole episode was. As soon as I heard her venting about what Ari said and that she might turn to a blade, that terrified me. She's been through hell everywhere except for when we were all together. She's always been strong. If I was under that much pressure and bullied that much, I probably would've killed myself. Rachel hardly shed a tear. That was probably a hint right there. She has this stupid showface where when she's feeling anything at all, she puts on her showface and bottles up all her emotions. When it gets to be too much, it all explodes at once.

I miss her, and I can't do anything about it. I need to wake up, to stop her from doing something she shouldn't. Like cut, drugs, anything that would help her block out her emotions. People compare Vocal Adrenaline to soulless automatons. It may seem like Rachel is one, but it's the opposite. She feels too much, so when she gets hurt, she's really hurt. I was glad when she took a call from what sounded like a friend last night. I tried to wake up, but my head suddenly got really fuzzy, causing the 'episode' last night. I smiled when she called me Roo. She hasn't done that in a while. Mostly because I've been in a coma.

"Come on Matty, wake up!" Rachel pleaded. I know she wanted me to wake up, so that she would feel better. That she didn't do more damage. I wish she could know that I don't blame her. Even if she ran me over, I couldn't blame her. She is and always will be my best friend. I'm also glad she finally stood up for herself at school. The only reason I know that is she came in normal clothes, and she looked happier then she did a week ago. She comes almost every day, hoping to see me awake, and I feel so bad that I can't physically be there for her.

My head started to feel fuzzy again, but not like last night. I opened my eyes after the fuzziness faded away.

"Roo! You're awake!" She shouted, hugging me so hard I lost air. I didn't care. I hugged her right back.