Me (TheNorwegianAuthor or TNA): Dear Reviwers, I LOVE YOU!
Salazar Slyherin: You are such an embarrassment...
Godric Gryffindor: Merlin, Salza, you act as Helga...
Salza: STOP CALLING ME SALZA,!
Helga Hufflepuff: WHAT DO YOU MEAN `ACT LIKE HELGA`!?
Godric: Why not?
Salza:...
Rowena Ravenclaw: Now TNA, get on!
Me: Okay, Mother!
Rowena:... Why do you Call me mother?
Salza: Because she thinks you act like an -
Me: Anyway, This is Chapter Three!
I would just like to tell "Guest" that, no, Jamie is not going to be a superior, ultra-awesome, universe-ruling god...
She gonna get some... you can`t Call it Powers, but... perks by being heir of hogwarts...
Jamie is gonna be OOC, but she gonna have faults, like everyone else...
She will think over situations more, and not be as rash as Harry and she will defintly be more cunning and sneakier.
Like Sirius Death, she would have opened the package he told her to open if she `needed him`, insted of going to Dumb-bitchs Office.
The escape of the Brazilian boa constrictor didn`t get me as long a punishment as I thought.
I was allowed out of my `lovely` cupboard as the summer holidays started.
Dudley had already broken his new video camera, crashed his remote control airplane, and, first time out on his racing bike, knocked down old Mrs. Figg as she crossed Privet Drive on her crutches.
I felt bad for poor ol`Mrs. Figgs, who was knocked down by that oversized pig of a human-being.
How the heck she survived Dudley landing on top of her was still a mystery to me.
I wondered how the Dursleys managed to explain to the School why I wasn`t there for over two weeks.
I didn`t mind School being over, it meant that I didn`t need to play dumb.
The first time I did better than Dudley at School (The first day), I got a beating for `Using my Freakishness to do better than sweet, little Diddykins at School`...
If that was the case, Dudley could realy have use of some Freakishness too..
I usally had to get C`s, cause there was NO FREAKING WAY that Dudley got anything above a C-... at a good day.
But even if the School was out, I didn`t escape Dudley's gang, who visited the house every single day.
Piers, Dennis, Malcolm, and Gordon was all big and stupid, but as Dudley was the biggest and stupidest of the lot, he was the leader.
I know, that was an obvious fact!
Dudley's favorite sport: Jamille Hunting.
That was why I liked to be in the forest, wandering around, practice my Powers, read in the clearing (I just borrowed Dudleys unused books without giving them back), swim in the little pond - I always seemed to dry when I got out of the water - and pretend that the Dursleys didn`t exist.
My Powers had just increased since I discovered them. Especially after my 9th birthday.
I could change my apperance (But I never told the Dursleys - it came in handy to look as Dudley at times...), put down the electricity in the whole Privet Drive, Open and Close Locks, Sometimes even breath underwater and fly (But not every time I tried), And, as I found out two weeks ago, talk to snakes...
As I walked trough the Forest I thought about next term, ` At September I was going to secondary school and, for the first time in my entire life, Dudley wouldn`t be at the same School! Diddykins had been accepted to Uncle Vernon's old private school, Smeltings.
Piers Polkiss was going there too.
I was going to Stonewall High, the local public school.
Dudley thought this was very funny.
Me to, thought it was funny.
Now Dudley wouldn`t get to complain to his Mummy when the Teachers gave him bad grades or scolded him.`
I recalled a memory from yesterday:
"They stuff people's heads down the toilet the first day at Stonewall," Dudley told me, smirking uglily. "Want to come upstairs and practice?", WOW, He must have practiced that setence for at least an hour!
"No, thanks," I said back. "The poor toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it – it might get sick." Then I ran away to the forest, before Dudley could work out what I'd just said. (Which, by the way, was true - the poor toilet had never had such a horribly thing down in it).
Back to present!
I sighed as I closed my book and walked to Privet Drive 4.
Aunt Petunia and Dudley had gone to London to buy Dudley a Smeltings uniform. Leaving Unvle Vernon to get me over to Mrs. Figg's before he left to work.
Mrs. Figg wasn't as bad as usual. She had broken her leg - AGAIN - when tripping over one of her thousands of cats - she didn't look quite as fond of them as last time I met her.
I was left watching TV with a bit of chocolate cake. That was the first time I ever tasted chocolate cake, or any form of Chocolate and cake, and the experience was ruined by the dust at the top of the cake.
When I got home again, Dudley played model for Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia in the living room shoving his brand-new Smeltings uniform.
Smeltings' boys wore maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers, and flat straw hats called boaters. Appealing!
They also carried around knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other while the teachers weren't looking. This was supposed to be good training for later life - YEAH - GIVE THE PIG BOY A STICK TO HIT OTHERS WITH!
As Dudley showed his new knickerbockers, Uncle Vernon said gruffly that it was the proudest moment of his life. WHAT LIFE?
Aunt Petunia burst into tears and said she couldn't believe it was her Ickle Dudleykins and he looked `so handsome and grown-up`. I didn't trust myself to speak at that momment. Two of my ribs might already have cracked from trying not to laugh or puke, I didt know which one.
The next morning when I went to make breakfast, the Kitchen was stinking.
The smell was coming from a large metal tub in the sink. I went over to take a look.
The tub was full of what looked like dirty rags swimming in gray water.
"Whats that?" I asked Aunt Petunia, pointing at the tub.
Her lips tightened as they always did if I dared to ask a question.
"Your new school uniform," she said as if it was obvious.
I looked down in the bowl again.
"oh, I didn't realize it had to be so wet. And won`t the elephant miss it`s skin?" I said sarcasticly.
"Don't be stupid," snapped Aunt Petunia. "I'm dyeing some of Dudley's old things gray for you. It'll look just like everyone else's when I've finished."
I seriously doubted this, but it was best not to argue.
I sat down at the table and tried not to think about how I was going to look on my first day at Stonewall High – like I was wearing bits of old elephant skin, probably.
Dudley and Uncle Vernon came in, both with wrinkled noses because of the smell from my new `So-called` uniform. Uncle Vernon opened his newspaper as usual and Dudley banged his Smelting stick, which he carried everywhere, on the table.
We heard the click of the mail slot and the flop of letters hitting the doormat.
"Get the mail, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon from behind his paper.
WHAT - DUDLEY DO SOMETHING?
RUN, HELL IS FREAZING OVER!
"Make the Freak get it."
Ah, I was overreacting.
"Get the mail, Freak.",
"Make Dudley get it", I tried.
"Poke her with your Smelting stick, Dudley."
Ah, the kindness of Family!
I easily dodged the Smelting stick and went to get the mail. Three letters lay on the doormat: a postcard from Uncle Vernon's horrible sister Marge, who was at a non-deserved vacatio on the Isle of Wight, a brown and yellow envelope that looked like a bill, and – a letter for ME.
I picked my letter up and stared at it, my heart twinging like a gigantic elastic band.
No one, ever, e-v-e-r, wrote to me. Who would? I had no friends, no other, living, relatives – I didn't go to the library, so I`d never even get rude notes asking for books back. Yet here it was, a letter, addressed so plainly there could be no mistake:
Ms. Jamille Lily Potter
The Cupboard under the Stairs, 4 Privet Drive
Little Whinging
Surrey
The envelope was thick and heavy, made of yellowish parchment (Who would use parchement in the 21st Century?), and the address was written in emerald-green ink.
There was no stamp.
Turning the envelope over, my hand trembling, I saw a purple wax seal bearing a coat of arms; a lion, an eagle, a badger, and a snake surrounding a large letter - H.
"Hurry up, girl!" shouted the O`so nice Uncle Vernon from the kitchen. "What are you dong, checking for letter bombs?", He chuckled at his own joke.
Yeah, very funny Uncle Vernon!
I quickly put the letter under my shirt, then went back to the kitchen, still thinking about my letter. I handed Uncle Vernon the bill and the postcard, Uncle Vernon ripped open the bill, snorted in disgust, and flipped over the postcard.
"Marge's ill," he informed Aunt Petunia. "Ate a funny whelk..."
I did a little happy Dance inside me - that old hag was ill, and I got a letter!
Could this day be better?
I ran out of the house screaming, "I`m coming back later!", laughing happily, while bounching to the clearing in the forest.
I have a poll at my profile - Who should be Jamilles`s friends at School?
Please vote!
