AN: Information on Letopolis from Stargate Wiki. Apophis' attempt to take if from Heru'ur's is my idea. Okay, quit scratching your head at this apparent tangent and go read. It'll make sense soon.

***SG1***SG1***

Pulling off his boot, Jack let it slip through his hands and thunk to the floor to join its mate. Rubbing a hand over his face, he refused to think about the last time he had been this tired. Unbidden, the memory of being on the mountain several weeks ago with Sam asleep against his side popped into his mind. Snorting, he was thankful that was the memory rather than anything else from the mission or its aftermath that could have appeared in his mind. Turning off the lamp and easing himself back onto the bed with a groan, he had just closed his eyes when a knock on the door echoed in the silent room.

Growling, he turned on the light as he rolled to his feet. "What?" he snarled, yanking open the door to glare at the person on the other side.

"O'Neill," Teal'c said in greeting. "I wish to speak with you."

The seriousness of the Jaffa's features halted any comment that Jack was going to make. "Yeah, sure," he said, stepping back to allow the big man to enter. Closing the door, Jack leaned against it, noting the tension in Teal'c's form as he stood in the middle of the room. "At ease, Airman," Jack quipped, moving past him to sit on the bed. After a few moments of silence, he tipped his head, asking an unspoken question.

Running his eyes over his comrade, Teal'c read the fatigue and impatience in his features. He also saw the curiosity. When he began to speak his voice was low. "Many years ago, when I was a young warrior, Apophis attempted to overtake a planet that had been taken from Bastet by Heru'ur. Letopolis was rich in trinium and Apophis knew that if Heru'ur was successful in establishing his base there, it would become a formidable stronghold he could use against all of the system lords. It was a prolonged engagement and many Jaffa were lost on both sides," he began, sadness echoing in his voice. "Myself and three other warriors were all that escaped from the forty Jaffa Apophis sent to the planet."

Jack winced at the magnitude of the loss, knowing what Teal'c must have been feeling.

"One of the other three who survived was a warrior named Ja'cal. He had seen many battles in his life and he had taught me much. I would not have survived if not for his assistance that day. This battle disturbed him more than any other. While he did not state this, I sensed in him a great reluctance to continue to serve Apophis. Shortly after the battle on Letopolis, he died when he broke cover to protect another Jaffa," Teal'c stated. Turning his gaze to O'Neill, he added, "He did so needlessly."

Jack froze at the words, remembering the growled threat from the Jaffa when he had tackled him and forced him to cover. Drawing a breath, he only got out 'Teal'c' before the big man interrupted him.

"I have no desire to tell SamanthaCarter that such an event has occurred with you," he said solemnly. "Nor do I wish to live with the loss of another brother in that manner."

Slowly standing, Jack took a couple steps to bring himself before the Jaffa. "I don't want to die," he said softly.

"Yet, I do not believe you wish to fight more battles either," Teal'c countered, locking eyes with Jack.

The truth of Teal'c words flashed across Jack's face before it was replaced with fatigue. "No," Jack breathed, turning away to move back to the bed. "I'm tired," he threw back over his shoulder. "The fighting, the loss, the damage," he stopped, shaking his head. "That mission with Carter," Jack tapered off, looking down at his hands. Clearing his throat, he added, "Sometimes the price is too high."

Cocking his head, the Jaffa asked, "Then why did you request to rescue SG-3 when you did not need to?"

Shrugging, Jack looked away. "To see if I could," he murmured. "Couldn't let my last one be PX9-493 being as it was such an abject failure and all," he said, a tinge of forced humor and derision in his tone.

"Then you are leaving the SGC," Teal'c stated, drawing the only conclusion he could from Jack's words.

Running a hand over his face, Jack sighed. "I don't know," he said flatly. "Look," he added, standing up with a wince. "I'm really tired right now and can't be held accountable for what I say. But, I know I don't want to die, okay?" Moving over to the door, he laid a hand on the knob. "Can we talk about the rest later?"

Tipping his head in agreement, Teal'c headed out. Stopping in the doorway, he added quietly before leaving, "Bringing Major Carter back from PX9-493 is not a failure O'Neill."

***SG1***SG1***

Easing down onto the stool by the infirmary bed, Jack gave Daniel a smile. "Hey. Doc said you were awake."

"Hey yourself," Daniel answered back, his voice groggy. "Everyone else okay?"

Jack's nod assured him they were. "Nelson's critical," he amended. "Three's already headed home for a few days of rest."

Daniel let a sigh of relief pass through him. "How about you?" he asked after a few minutes of silence passed.

"Tired," Jack winced. "Getting too old for these 48 hour work days." Waving off the alarmed look he was getting, he added, "I grabbed a couple hours while you were sleeping. Heading home, but wanted to see how you were doing first."

Raising the small red button controller for Jack to see, Daniel quipped, "Janet's got me on the good stuff."

Glancing up at the IV pole and the bag of morphine connected to the regulating pump, Jack smirked. "Noticed that."

"You call Sam?"

Shaking his head, Jack clarified. "Hammond did. I got to talk with her during it." Jack looked away before he added, "She wasn't happy you got shot."

Daniel watched Jack avoid his gaze. "You mean she wasn't happy you went out on a mission."

Eyes darted back. "She's worried about you and Teal'c, too," he said, an edge of defensiveness in his tone.

"Jack."

Daniel's exasperated tone caused Jack to close his eyes briefly before he brought them back to the archaeologist. "I've asked Hammond for some leave. A couple weeks," he said. Looking back down, he added, "I need to figure out what I'm going to do." A flash of emotion passed over his face with a sigh. "If they don't bring frat charges," he clarified.

Daniel swallowed, looked up at the ceiling. "Think that's a good idea? Being by yourself?"

Tapping the bed as he stood, Jack gave him a tight smile. "I'll be okay. Have a couple calls set up with Rogers anyway. Still have to do those. I'll call ya, okay?" he added, starting to move away.

Daniel's call stopped him. "You know it's not your fault I got shot, right?"

Turning back, Jack nodded at him. Starting again, he threw over his shoulder as he moved away, "Teal'c's gonna bring a phone in later so you can call Carter."

***SG1***SG1***

Sighing, George tossed the file he had been reading on the stack of completed reviews. Picking up Jack's service file, he opened it and stared at the picture in it wondering how the man had come through so much and still be alive and relatively sane. A knock on the door brought his attention away from the file. "Colonel," he said, acknowledging the officer and waving for him to enter. "I thought you'd be catching some sleep by now. What can I do for you?"

"Sir," Tom French said, easing into the room. "Slept some," he acknowledged. "Having a little problem unwinding," he added ruefully.

Nodding, Hammond gestured for him to have a seat. Waiting until the officer had eased down, he asked again, "What can I do for you?"

"I just wanted to," Tom began, pausing to look down before squaring his shoulders and looking back toward the General. "Thank you, Sir, for sending others to get us."

A small smile pulled on George's face. "It wasn't an option not to, Tom," he said. "Not when we knew you were alive and waiting."

"Yes, Sir," French acknowledged. Looking away for a minute, he licked his lips. "Sir, I shouldn't be saying this, but..."

The troubled look passing over the younger man's features brought a frown to Hammond's face. "Colonel?"

"There was a third report submitted to the Pentagon."

"A third report?" Hammond repeated carefully. Running his eyes over the officer before him, he leaned back. "About me, my command abilities," he surmised.

"Yes, Sir," French said quietly.

Hammond nodded slowly. "I see." Letting out a slow breath, George let his features soften. "This isn't my first rodeo. My ability to make decisions about the operation of this base and my officers was bound to be questioned by recent events." He lifted his hand and allowed it to drop back to the desk. "We'll both have to wait and see what they decide about that won't we."

"Yes, Sir," Tom breathed, looking Hammond in the eye. "Sir, for what it's worth, if they decide anything but that you are one of the finest the Air Force has, they are complete fools."

"Thank you, Tom," George said, a flash of embarrassment at the praise passing through him. "If there's nothing else, I've got to finish this report so we can hopefully put this sordid mess to rest."

***SG1***SG1***

"Besides the rape, what do you remember the most?"

Sam swallowed at the question. Shifting in the chair to buy time, she glanced briefly at the doctor before focusing her gaze out the office window.

Her uneasiness brought a small smile to Tiffany's face. "You know anything that you say here is confidential, right?"

"To a point," Sam countered. "You can't promise that." Shaking her head, she looked away and licked her lips. "You work for the military. If you learn of a breach of regulations you have no choice but to report it."

Slowly nodding, Rogers toyed with her pen. "Was there a violation of regulations?" Looking up at Sam, she changed the question. "I asked Colonel O'Neill if he had raped you. He said he didn't. Do you disagree?"

"No." The answer was firm. "He wouldn't do that."

"You're sure?" An answering nod and blue eyes latching onto her's made her shake her head in agreement. "Okay. So what then?"

"I," Sam paused, licking her lips. "I forced him to place me, my well being, above others."

A slow nod met her words. "When he killed to protect you or when you asked him to kill you?"

A flinched passed across Sam's face. "I wasn't strong enough to do it myself."

"To kill yourself?" the Doctor asked. Sam's countenance told her she partially correct. "To stop it?" A shrug met her question. "To cope with what had happened?"

"I still can't." Sam's voice was husky, thick.

"No one can," Tiffany pushed gently back. "Something like this, no one can be expected to do it alone."

Watching as the color seeped back into her fingers after she forced them to release their grip on each other, Sam said softly, "I remember feeling the fear ease when I was pressed against him. That," a frown shifted across her features, "I would be safe as long as I held onto him."

"That's understandable," Rogers said gently. "You've watched each other's backs for years."

"Is that all it is?"

Stillness settled over Tiffany at the emotions hidden in the five quietly spoken words. Realizing she needed to say something, she licked her lips. "When something big happens to us or around us, to survive it, we instinctually rely on what has gotten us through other times," she said, her voice carefully modulated. "On what we know to be inherently true."

"That the Colonel has a duty to protect his team." There was a tinge of bitterness in Sam's tone.

"Yes, but in this case, that's only part of it," Rogers countered.

A frown crossed Sam's features. "Part?"

A small smile pulled on the corner of Tiffany's mouth. "You needed comfort, both physically and emotionally. A man can do a lot more than a Colonel can in that situation."

"So you're saying, what? That I would have reacted like that to any man who had been in the room with me?" Sam asked, her eyes troubled.

Tiffany shook her head. "No. In fact, from the reports from others there, you did not react well to the presence of other men. I'm saying that Jack comforts you, not Colonel O'Neill. You need him. You rely on the man, not the soldier." A snort met her words.

"And we're right back to the beginning of this conversation," Sam said. Looking down for a moment, Sam brought sad eyes up. "Please don't report this, punish him for my weakness."

Leaning forward, Tiffany made sure she looked Sam in the eye. "It's not a weakness to need someone."

"Yeah, well, in this situation, I think the Air Force will disagree with you."

***SG1***SG1***

AN2: Okay, confession time. I have been a couple chapters ahead of you in writing. Lately real life has been kicking me and I am now behind. I'm going to try my best, but the next chapter may not be ready next week. So, keep your fingers crossed. I'll get it up if at all possible. Thanks for your continued support on this story. It means a lot.