Notes: This chapter turned out a lot longer than I was expecting, but I'm glad that it's given more characters a chance to shine because of that. Arianna and Tony in particular are proving quite an interesting part of the story, considering I hadn't initially intended for them to be involved as much as they have been.
"I think this is all o' it," Crow called, as he placed a porcelain figurine of an elephant into the bag he was carrying, being careful not to damage it amongst the other items already in there.
Badger had to confess that he'd never understood what Mr. Shackwell had seen in the porcelain ornaments. Or any of the other tat he'd bought at the market, for that matter. When Crow and Badger had first come here earlier that week, the knick-knacks overran every space in the living room, doing nothing more than gathering dust. There was so much packed into this single room that even the stock horde in Crow's bedroom might have been given a run for its money. And on top of that, most of the other rooms in the house all contained traces of the unfortunate purchasing habit as well. It was no wonder that Louis's family eventually saw this as so much of a problem that they had to get away from it.
"Still dunno 'ow I feel about all this..." murmured Badger. He was tying up his own bag by the door, ready to leave.
"It ain't ideal," Crow confessed, not for the first time this week, "But Louis practically gave us permission when 'e left. I reckon 'is mum'll be glad to see the back o' this lot as well."
"I suppose. But all this stuff 'ad t' mean summit t' Mr. Shackwell, reet?" debated Badger. It was a weak point in an argument that he knew he'd already lost, but part of him was simply searching for any reassurance Crow could give him about what they were doing.
Crow sighed; "Nothin' 'ere meant anythin' to 'im, I can promise ya that. People like Shackwell don't work that way. They want the thrill o' the auction an' they can't stand not 'avin' somethin'. But when they get wot they want, it's just a token to show that they've won. They'll just put it away an' move onto the next thing. I know 'cause... well, I'm kinda like that myself. Only I've made it work for me inna way that Shackwell couldn't."
A nod from Badger as he processed exactly what Crow was saying. In truth he'd never thought about it like that and certainly wouldn't compare Mr. Shackwell to Crow on any level. But apparently Crow did and knew a lot more about what was going on in the man's head than Badger. Although that did raise another question.
"Um, Crowlo...? I know we doun't like t' talk about this and it's too late now anyway, but... um, why did you let 'im keep comin' to the auctions if you knew 'e were like that?" Badger asked, "I-if you doun't wanna say I'll undehstand, like..."
"Nah, it's okay," assured Crow, "I guess all o' that did 'appen before ya joined the Black Ravens, didn't it?"
"Yeah," echoed Badger.
Although he was one of the earlier members of the group, Badger knew that Crow and Roddy had held a few small auctions to test the waters before he had joined. Back then it seemed as if the two best friends had tried out a lot of different ideas to see what would work. Ideas that the Black Ravens now took for granted. You could even still find a few of the early prototypes for the Black Raven outfit itself if you looked hard enough in the underground store room. And by the time Badger joined, Louis's dad was already a common face amongst the stalls outside of the auction room. His presence had been what had led Louis to find the group in the first place, if Badger remembered rightly.
"We all knew it wasn't the best choice we could o' made," Crow continued. Which was putting it lightly; "Back at the start we didn't know Louis as more than just some kid whose family moved 'ere when the factory was lookin' for workahs. So when Shackwell took interest in our auctions, we 'ad no idea 'e was Louis's dad. It was just me an' Rod back then, so we took any customahs we could find."
"Then Lozza came lookin' fer 'im," Badger prompted. He knew that much, since by the time that happened Badger had joined the group as well. "But that doun't explain why you kept doin' it."
"Louis's dad was already in pretty deep at that stage. I know now that it was wrong, but back then I was more concerned that 'e might put a stop to us if we suddenly banned 'im for no reason," admitted Crow, "So Louis an' me made a deal – that the money 'is dad spent would go back to 'im, as long as 'e 'elped us. On top o' that, 'e got to make any extra money from workin' at the auctions, so it's not as if it was a bad deal, even if it was a bit undah'anded."
"So we neveh made owt on the tat we sold t' Shackwell?" Badger checked.
"Eventually we would. Once 'is dad lost interest in the trinkets, Louis would slowly smuggle 'em back to us an' we'd just 'afta be careful 'is dad didn't see 'em back at the auctions," explained Crow, "Back then I thought that'd 'elp the money problems we'd accidentally caused Louis's family. But it seems they were much biggah than that..."
"If it 'adn't been at the black market then 'e would of just wasted moneh somewhere else," Badger soothed.
"Yeah, it did seem like 'e 'ad a bad problem," agreed Crow, "I only 'ope that they can 'elp 'im get ovah it back in Livahpool."
"So do I..." mumbled Badger, as he peered haplessly around the now much more sparse living room.
"Well, don't wanna seem insensitive, but we should get a move on," prompted Crow, "Gotta get all this stuff ready for the auction tonight."
"Comin'," Badger called.
He picked his bag back up and followed Crow out of the room. All the times they'd broken into the house they'd done so through a small window around the back, which they would carefully close behind them when they left. Even if they did want to create the illusion that the Shackwells' home had been robbed by opportunist burglars while they were away (although technically that was entirely true...), they didn't want anyone else to genuinely break into the house. So they'd been careful to keep all of the doors locked and the house otherwise secure, save for that one window. Badger reasoned that only a local would know about the back window anyway, so it was unlikely that anyone other than them would see it. Or see the Black Ravens' occasional visits, for that matter.
All the same, he felt better when they were back out onto the streets and making their way to the underground base. What they were doing still seemed wrong, despite having Louis's blessings to do it, but he could put it behind him easier outside of the house.
Especially since the Black Ravens had so much more to focus on amongst their business right now.
Badger's idea had been a booming success, to put it lightly. The second set of auctions during the week had attracted almost more business than they knew what to do with and had put them back on a track that Badger was starting to worry they'd never see again.
At first he'd been concerned that the existing customers from their more upmarket auctions might be offended to discover that the Black Raven had extended its hand to a lower class of buyer, but it had turned out that the opposite was the case. Crow had spun his words so that they knew the better quality merchandise was reserved for them. Their single weekly auction was a special one that made them elite. And there were few things in life that rich customers loved more than being told they were selected to be seen as a better class on people, Scraps would say. In this case Badger might have to agree with him, given how much their wealthy punters had lapped this up.
The end result was that everyone was happy. The Black Ravens were happy to be back at work for real, the rich customers were happy that they could now think of themselves as being better than the others, and all of their many, many new customers were happy to be here at all. If they weren't careful, the black market auctions might end up becoming as much of a tourist draw to Misthallery as the Golden Garden itself was.
But with all of this recent success in mind, the group had needed to work a lot harder than before to keep up their stock levels. Crow's words were that an auction should never be cancelled for fear of low stock, because that might create a bad image. They wanted everyone to think that the Black Raven had an inexhaustible supply of rare goods to generously provide the guests with. Which was all fine and well, but it was turning out to be a lot to keep up with.
As if to prove this point, Scraps almost pounced on the two of them when they did get back down to the base.
"Anything decent at Louis's house then?" he pressed.
It was unusual to see Scraps here instead of scouring the piles of junk for potential items to sell. That must mean the the turn up of new items was proving to be even lower than expected. He certainly appeared to be worried enough for this to be the case.
"Nothin' we 'aven't sold before," replied Crow, as he put his bag down on the table, "But at least that means we'll know wot to charge for 'em when we sell this stuff again. An' maybe we can challenge ourselves to make a bettah price this time."
"Hmm," Scraps dismissed. He wasted no time in going through both Crow's bag and Badger's when it was put down along with the first. After a few moments of critically inspecting everything, he shook his head; "It's going to be a poor auction tonight."
"Can't we dip into our reserve stock?" offered Crow.
"We've already emptied all that," grumbled Scraps, "Do you think I wouldn't have done that first, before saying there's a problem?"
"I suppose so," Crow sighed, "An' there's definitely nothin' to be found around the streets?"
Scraps grinned in an almost sinister way; "Roddy's out double-checking, much to his annoyance. But if I can't find anything then I doubt anyone else will be able to either. We're just going to have to wait a while for the piles to build back up.
"Maybe so, but I ain't cancellin' tonight's auction," insisted Crow, "We'll make do with wot we 'ave. It just means we'll 'afta spread it out an' make a bit more o' a show outta drivin' the price up for each item."
"I can help you with that."
The three of them turned towards the curtains in time to see both of the Barde siblings come through. Arianna was the one who addressed Crow and seemed to regard him critically as she approached.
"Are ya sure? It's been very kind o' ya to 'elp us out so far, but if ya get fed up o' doin' it we'll completely undahstand," reasoned Crow.
"No, it's all quite thrilling really," Arianna assured him, "If I place lower bids earlier on it'll mean we can space out each item more. And if things start to look too abysmal, then I can sweep in with a high bid to shock them."
"That sounds like a good plan," murmured Crow. Although it seemed to Badger as if he had his reservations, "Just don't 'buy' too many o' the goods, since we don't get money from ya bids."
Arianna tutted, "If you do a good enough job convincing the crowd this stuff is worth it in the first place, then I won't have to step in to save your face. It's all down to you, Crow."
"Th-the Black Ravens are a team," Badger cut in, "It's down t' all of us."
"Badger's right," piped Tony, who seemed keen not to start an argument between his friends, "As long as we all do our parts, we'll be fine."
"Then we'd all best get ready if we want to have this auction at all," instructed Scraps. He hadn't stepped in sooner, since petty arguments weren't something he was interested in, but cutting into work time was the line where Scraps started to care.
"Scraps is right," agreed Crow, "If all o' ya start settin' up the 'all, then I'll go fetch Roddy, Gus an' Marilyn."
With that he headed off, giving not so much as a backwards glance to the four of them. It made Badger nervous when tensions got like this. Because while there had so far been no real problems with having the two Bardes here, Crow and Arianna did seem to test each other's nerves. It wasn't too much of a stretch to imagine that cross words might cause problems some day and it wouldn't be good if that occurred while the Black Ravens so desperately needed their friends' help.
Though on the other hand, he might merely be worrying about nothing. Having the two of them work together like this could be just the ticket to burying any grudges between them and could help all of the group become better friends with Tony and Arianna than they were before.
These two notions went back and forth in Badger's head as he quietly carried on with the preparations. He was so distracted by his own concerns for his friends that it felt like no time at all before they were all gathered and waiting for the customers in the auction hall to take their seats.
"Looks like a rowdy bunch tonight," Roddy observed, after sticking his head around the curtain, "I know we've been more open about who we're letting in, but I can't help feeling that we might have gotten a bit far ahead with some of those faces."
"If things get outta 'and then we can sort it," promised Crow, "Unless ya scared, Rod?"
"Me? Scared? As if!" snorted Roddy, "It's you I'm worried about. You're such a little thing after all, aren't you?"
"Watch it," Crow warned. There was a definite frown visible before he covered his face with the Black Raven mask, "I know what I'm doin'."
"We don't doubt that," chuckled Marilyn.
She was sat near the back, with Badger next to her. In truth, the auctions were Badger's least favourite part of being a Black Raven, given that large crowds made him nervous. Marilyn was such a confident person that being around her at times like these made him feel better, even if he did feel a bit bad that it stopped her from taking a more active role in the auctions. She would assure him that she didn't mind, but given Marilyn's expertise in handling customers at her parents' stall, Badger couldn't help but assume that she could have given even Crow a run for his money with working the crowd if she ever did get up on the stage. Whenever Badger brought this up though, Marilyn would merely smile and say that she didn't like showing off as much as Crow did.
"Thanks, glad to see that someone 'as faith in me," concluded Crow, as he made some final adjustments to his outfit.
"Just get out there and give us a reason to," Roddy demanded. He was grinning though, so his words were clearly in jest.
"I always do," assured Crow.
With that, Crow made his way out into the auction hall. They all knew that their Crow was now gone until the end of the evening and would be replaced entirely by the Black Raven. It was a role he took so seriously that sometimes it felt like a transformation. After a few years of this, they'd all gotten use to it and barely even noticed any more. But it seemed as if the appeal had yet to wear off for their honourary member, Tony, who was almost glued to the curtain as he watched the Black Raven with eager eyes.
"I don't know how he does it," proclaimed Tony, wistfully, "It's almost as if he's a different person out there."
"He's had a long time to practise," Gus answered.
Badger could tell that Gus was quietly quite happy that Tony seemed to have replaced him as being the most naïve member of the Black Ravens. Back in the old days, even though Socket was the youngest of them all, his mechanical skills made him swiftly become respected amongst the group. Whereas Gus, the next youngest after Socket, seemed more child-like in comparison, given his eagerness to please, love of sweets and general clumsiness. Although Badger had begun to notice changes in Gus over the last year, having a bright-eyed new member like Tony around definitely did drive home just how much Gus had changed from the kid he was before.
"You can still see the signs of Crow if you look hard enough though," Marilyn added, "Sometimes it feels as if Crow might become the Black Raven one day."
"Only if we let him get too far ahead of himself," growled Roddy, who didn't seem to be too eager for that to happen.
Badger looked at Roddy and found himself suddenly reminded of their conversation from before he'd gone to Northumberland with Crow, Louis and Gus. Back then Roddy had told Badger it was down to him to look after Crow while Roddy couldn't. But did that still apply now that they were all back together? As much as Badger wanted to think that he had gotten to a place where he could be more open with Crow compared to before, it did seem to have slipped back into being Roddy who was keeping an eye on him, not Badger.
"Shh! The bidding for the first item is starting!" Tony hissed, which sharply ceased further discussion on the matter.
For a moment, Badger felt that he could now get settled until the auction was over. Now that they'd had a fair few sessions amongst the new crowds, it was clear that the plan had worked and there was less need to keep an eye on the numbers as there had been to start with. They all knew it was going to do well. So Badger would have been happy enough to sit with Marilyn at the back, occasionally helping Gus lift some of the heavier goods through, should the need arise.
But tonight he wasn't given the chance to do that.
He happened to be looking in Tony's direction in time to see all of the colour drain from the younger boy's face. In that second, it seemed that each of the others in the store room got to their feet as one and dashed over.
"Oh no..." Tony whimpered.
By the time they were level with him, it appeared that a small drama was unfolding out front. A tall, heavy-set man was looming over Arianna from within the audience and appeared to be challenging her bid.
"I saw you here last time!" the man boomed, "And the time before that! You always bid on the first thing that comes up and you spend way too much money!"
To her credit, Arianna didn't back down or even seem imposed by this person. She blinked up at him and kept her frown in place, as if he was nothing more than an ant disturbing her afternoon picnic.
"Am I not allowed to come here as often as I want and spend as much as I wish?" she challenged.
"If you're so rich, then why are you at this auction and not the other one?" questioned the man, "I bet this is a fix!"
"My regulah puntahs 'ave the right to go to whichevah auction they choose," Crow assured, from the front of the hall, "An' I don't appreciate the accusation. Now sit down, sir, or I'll 'afta escort ya out."
"You're not answering me because you know I'm right!" the man roared, "I could come here every time and she'd always win the first damned lot! This is a set up and if I'm made to leave, then I demand that this brat leaves with me!"
"Ya can't-" Crow started, but he wasn't quick enough on the uptake.
The enraged stranger grabbed hold of Arianna's wrist. From behind the curtain, Tony screamed so loudly that it startled most of them, combined with a few people in the nearby rows, into a state of shock.
But not Roddy. He grabbed the nearest Black Raven outfit, threw it on and charged out into the auction hall. Before Badger or even the aggressive man knew what was happening, he'd roughly prised the fingers off Arianna's wrist and shoved the man away.
"What do you think you're doing, attacking a young lady like that?" demanded Roddy, not even trying to mask his own voice with that of the Black Raven's right now, "I don't care what you think we're doing, nothing is reason enough to hurt someone!"
"I-I-I wasn't... 'attacking' her..." debated the man, "I was only... um..."
It seemed that, regardless of his intent, the crowd was against him. The whole room was filled with muttering now and those who sat close to the scene seemed to be edging away.
"No matter, I feel that ya should leave now," insisted Crow, who seemed to have recovered from his lack of composure, "We will not extend our 'and o' welcome to ya in future. Now please remove yaself from this room, so that our good customahs can carry on with wot they came 'ere for tonight."
"Not tonight..." Roddy protested. It felt like his voice carried over the entire hall as he spoke, "...They all go tonight. There's no auction tonight now."
A silence passed across the room after that, as all eyes fell upon Crow. Even Roddy's gaze was fixed on the leader, Badger noted, as he looked between them both. The two figures in their Black Raven robes stared across at each other, their faces unreadable beneath the masks.
But ultimately, it was Crow's will that gave out.
"I fear that my friend is correct," he said, addressing the auction hall at large, "Carryin' on would upset wot our good-natured auctions are known for. The Black Raven extends it's deepest apologies to our loyal customah for the distress that 'as been caused. She may come through to back room an' choose any o' the wares that we planned to sell tonight for 'er own takin'. To the rest o' ya, I also apologise an' 'ope that I will see ya again soon, at our next auction per'aps. Upon which time we will know who not to invite any longah."
As he spoke, Roddy was already leading Arianna down the aisle towards the store room. Although she must be shaken from what had just happened, as far Badger could tell she kept her composure well, seeming to not react at all while the crowd's eyes were upon her. It might be a terrible thing to think, but Badger supposed that she must be use to questioning eyes being upon her from the time when Misthallery believed her to be a witch. All that negative attention must harden a strong person like Arianna towards such matters.
However, as soon as she was safely back with the others, Tony grabbed her in a tight hug and sobbed loudly into her shoulder.
"Are you all right?" he wailed, "I-I thought that guy was going to... to..."
"I'm fine," assured Arianna, softly stroking the back of his hair, "There's no need to worry about me." She then turned her attention to Roddy, who was pulling down the hood of his Black Raven outfit; "...Thank you for what you did back there."
"Think nothing of it," grumbled Roddy, as he took off the mask, "You're one of us now and we look after our own."
Despite his dismissal, Badger couldn't help but feel that Roddy took care of them all more than he got credit for. It was no wonder that Roddy had viewed himself as being the one to catch Crow when his more risky schemes fell apart and saw that role as being so important that he needed to briefly assign it to Badger when he couldn't do so himself...
...And speaking of risky schemes falling apart, Crow pushed his way through the curtain to join them.
"That's the last o' them out through the door," he informed, "But I don't trust 'em to get out on the streets without makin' a fuss. Gus, Scraps, if the two o' ya don't mind, could ya go an' make sure they know they're bein' watched? Just... don't get into 'arm's away while ya at it."
"In that case, I'll go with them," announced Roddy. He reached for the mask that he'd only just taken off, "Nothing's gonna get outta hand on my watch."
"If, um, if ya sure," mumbled Crow, "Though we should talk latah..."
"There's nothing to say," Roddy growled, "I trust you to make the right decision on your own."
With that, he left the room. Soon enough Gus and Scraps pulled on their own Black Raven outfits and followed along behind him. Once the three of them were out of sight, Crow slumped heavily onto one of the wooden crates they kept for storage.
"Tonight's been a mess..." he sighed, "I'm so sorry, Arianna, really I am."
"It's all right, we knew the risks when we got involved in this," Arianna replied.
"Um, I don't think I did..." gulped Tony, his eyes still wet with tears as he addressed Crow, "...I thought you were all so cool. And... and I still do, but... w-well, I don't think I want to carry on with this if Arianna's going to be in danger."
"It's fine, Tony," Arianna insisted.
"But it's not!" argued Tony, "That guy grabbed you and I don't even know what he was going to do to you! If he'd hurt you, after everything else you'd been through, if... if I'd lost you because of something like that then... then..."
"None of us would let that happen," soothed Marilyn, speaking up after a prolonged silence, "You saw how fast Roddy got out there. He's like our grumpy guardian angel and I can promise you nothing bad will happen on his watch. We've been getting arrogant lately, I'm sure we can all agree on that. But we've had our wake-up call about carelessness and I'm certain that we'll all take better care in future because of it. Even so, I know how shocking tonight must have been for you both, even if you're good at not showing it, Arianna. So perhaps it would be best if you go home, get some rest and then talk about this seriously with each other. You're not tied to the Black Ravens and if either of you feel that this isn't right for you, then we won't hold you back. We're your friends first, after all."
"Thank you, Marilyn," concluded Arianna, with a small smile, "We'll follow your advice and get back to you all as soon as we can."
"Take as much time as you need," Marilyn assured, "Now, I think we should all head home for the night."
"You lot can, but I'm gonna clear up 'ere," informed Crow.
"Do you need a 'and?" offered Badger.
"Nah, I think it's best all o' ya get a good night's sleep, like Mal said," Crow dismissed. It was a polite way of saying that he needed time on his own and Badger knew that; "Just let mum know that I'll be late an' she doesn't need to wait up for me."
"Will do..." whispered Badger, feeling a little dejected.
Marilyn put her hand on Badger's back and led him out of the room, along with the Barde siblings. The four of them made their way outside in a contemplative silence and Badger didn't doubt that Tony & Arianna were probably waiting until they were back home before they could talk openly about this evening. The two of them had been cut off from society for such a long time in the past that they must deal with some matters together better than they could with others, even now that it had been a few years since the spectre incident had been brought to an end.
As for Badger, he felt that Marilyn was the only person he wanted to talk to right now, so he was just as glad as they were when they'd waved the two of them back off towards Barde Manor.
"Think they'll be all right?" he checked, once they'd disappeared into the garden that led up to their home.
"Yeah, I doubt there's anything that'll hurt them this close to where they live," answered Marilyn, "Besides, all of the tourists are staying at the hotel further down, so they probably wouldn't wander this far at night."
"I suppose yer right," agreed Badger, "...Um, Marilyn?"
"Yes, Badger?" she prompted.
"Do you... well, think that... i-it's my fault what 'appened?" Badger pressed, letting his nerves show properly for the first time that evening.
Marilyn raised an eyebrow at him, but didn't appear to be all that shocked by the question. She'd known Badger for a long time and knew exactly how paranoid he could be in regards to blaming himself.
"Did you threaten Arianna? No. You didn't even invite the guy that did. And if you had done, well, you can't predict how he would have reacted," Marilyn countered, "No one could have known that. Especially since he'd already been to a few auctions without any trouble. All tonight means is that we'll know for future to be better prepared."
Badger wasn't convinced by this though; "I were the one who gave Crow the idea for expandin' our auctions to more people, though. If it weren't fer me then... then..."
"...The Black Ravens might have already ended," finished Marilyn, "You came up with that idea because we'd lost our spark. And it's a good idea that does work. We've just had this one blip because we've been eager enough to rush into it without as much planning as we could have done. But we'll learn from this. Next time will be better."
"Crow might not want t' do a next one," Badger debated. He was letting all of his worries bubble up to the surface now. "He might think it's too dangerous and go back t' onleh doin' the one auction fer the rich folk. Then... then we'll fall back int' our slump and Crow might... leave..."
Marilyn stopped suddenly. She folded her arms and stared at Badger.
"What will you do if Crow leaves?" she demanded.
"I dunno...!" Badger wailed.
"Has all of this been about coming up with ideas to make sure Crow doesn't go? Have you been pushing the auctions to give him a reason to stay?" Marilyn went on.
"No! I wanted t' 'elp everyone!" cried Badger, "B-but also... yeah, I little bit..."
Getting it out in the open made the whole matter feel a lot worse to Badger. Because in truth, he had been very much concerned about finding a way to stop Crow from leaving. The fact that his solution ended up helping all of the Black Ravens simply made it easier for Badger to distract himself from what he'd been trying to do initially.
He watched as Marilyn's expression softened. She unfolded her arms and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. When she next spoke her voice was softer, but the words she said didn't worry Badger any less.
"We all know how much you care about Crow," Marilyn promised, "But you can't keep chipping away at bits of yourself just to keep Crow whole."
"I can't lose him..." whimpered Badger, before he could stop himself.
"You will if you carry on like this. And I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but you need to see that there's only so much you can do to keep him here. Crow will leave one day, I'm almost certain of it. And if you keep trying to stop that from happening, you'll only hurt yourself more when it does," Marilyn said, seeming sad to have to put it into words.
"Crow's bin so 'appy with the new auctions..." mumbled Badger, "If they keep gan like this, if we can work out the problems..."
"Then it will become usual eventually," assured Marilyn, "It's not the auctions that are the problem, it's Misthallery. Crow found his passion in life early on, but now he's mastered doing it in this small town to the point that there aren't enough challenges here for him. He could live comfortably by doing this for a long time if he wanted to and the Black Ravens could become a definite part of Misthallery's tourist trade, but Crow won't be satisfied with that. He wants to push himself further. And you can only trick him into thinking he's doing that here for so long until he realises that he's not."
"I weren't tryin' to trick him..." Badger whined, not even attempting to stop the tears from welling up in his eyes.
"No, you were trying to fix the problem, because you can't imagine a life without Crow," Marilyn clarified, "But all you're doing is hurting yourself and none of us want you to do that, especially not Crow. So you need to come to terms with it, Badger. If you want to stay safe in Misthallery forever, then you need to accept that one day you will be without Crow. You need to become strong enough to live without Crow."
Badger thought about everything that Crow had done for him. About how Crow had found him as an awkward loner, who was barely brave enough to say more than a few words to anyone, and moulded him into the Badger who used his skills at running and maths to help out with a team of people. Because of Crow, Badger now had a group of friends who he wasn't scared to be around. He could now see that it didn't matter so much that he couldn't read or that he was scared of strangers, because he had so many other abilities that made him Badger. He also knew that right now, without Crow, he wouldn't even have a home to go to. Not with his dad being in hospital.
No, Badger couldn't imagine a life without Crow.
But then again...
...Back when Crow had left for London, at what felt like the start of all this, Badger had been faced with the prospect of a life without Crow, even for a short amount of time. He'd decided to himself back then that he needed to become a bold new Badger, who could manage just fine without Crow. That plan had been... less than successful. He still felt as if he was the same Badger that he'd always been.
However, this idea of a new Badger made him realise that what Marilyn was telling him had already been in his mind. He'd been aware of it this whole time and everything else had just been an elaborate method of blocking it out.
Marilyn was right – if he wanted to stay in Misthallery, then he would have to prepare himself for the possibility of a life without Crow eventually.
All the same, that wasn't Badger's only option, was it?
"Y-yeah, yer right," he stammered, as all these thoughts rushed through his head, "It's not fair on Crowlo or me or any of you lot if I keep doin' this."
"Please don't be hard on yourself though, Badger," insisted Marilyn, "Your idea for the auctions has helped us a lot. We might be able to keep going in a way we couldn't before. I just don't want to see you torn apart by whatever Crow chooses to do."
"I promise that I woun't," assured Badger, as he came to a grim decision in his mind, "I'll make meself readeh. And if I'm not, then I'll deal with that when I get there. But, eh, I reckon we've all 'ad a long night tonight, 'aven't we? Probably should get back before the crack of dawn, shouldn't we?"
"That sounds like a good idea," agreed Marilyn, even if the concern hadn't yet left her voice, "I'll walk you back around to Crow's house."
"Thanks, Mal... fer all of this," Badger mumbled, "Dunno who else I could of talked t' about it."
"Don't think anything of it," hummed Marilyn, "And if you ever need any more advice, then I'm always here for you."
"I'll keep that in mind," Badger replied.
The two of them walked the rest of the way back to the market with no more discussion of Crow after that. But Badger knew that the Black Ravens would all have a lot on their mind right now, not just him with his problems about Crow. There was Tony and Arianna, who would have to come to a decision about if they wanted to carry on with this, Crow who needed to decide how the auctions would proceed, and Roddy, who apparently trusted Crow to make the right choice regardless. With so much uncertainty, Badger imagined that all of them would be doing a great deal of fretting before the next meeting.
But for now, there was little more that any of them could do about any of it. They would regroup later, hopefully refreshed, and make their decisions from then. Until that happened, Badger would simply wait and try to put his own complications in order.
