[The Super Adventure Club, day. The club is a rambling house several stories tall, and access to it is just one ragged rope bridge. The entrance to the bridge reads "Super Adventure Club." The boys approach it calmly and walk upon the bridge.]
Cartman: Hey you guys, you know what they call a Jewish woman's boobs? Jewbs. [they step off on the other side and approach the front door. Stan reaches over and pulls the rope that rings the house's bell. A black butler opens up]
Butler: May I help you.
Kyle: Ahh, hi, can we speak to the head guy or something?
Butler: Right this way. [the boys enter and the butler leads them to the ]
Head Adventurer: Now, the upper rim of Kilimanjaro should be quite a trek, and so we'll need to have a-
Butler: Excuse me, sir. These boys wanted to speak with you.
Head Adventurer: Ahh yes, splendid! Good afternoon, lads! I'm Head Adventurer William P. Connolly, Esquire! Welcome, to the Super Adventure Club!
Club Members: Tally ho!
Mr. Connolly: Indeed!
Kyle: Uh, hi. Our friend joined your club a while back, and now he wants to molest kids. [the members just look around]
Mr. Connolly: What? Well... well yes, of course! That's what the Super Adventure Club does!
Cartman: ...Huh?
Marksman: We travel the world and have sex with children!
Marine: Yes, what else would we do?
Kyle: Well, we thought you went exploring and like, hunting and stuff!
Mr. Connolly: Noo, no, that's the Adventure Club. We're the Super Adventure Club! [turns and approaches a world map from maybe two centuries ago] Next week, we'll be heading to the outer banks of the Amazon, where we will make camp and have sex with children of the Ugani tribe, then it's off to the mighty Himalayas, where we will climb K-2, and molest several Tibetan children on the east summit.
Kyle: ...Dude!
Mr. Connolly: I know, but it gets even better! From there we will kayak to the fruitful banks of the Mele River in Africa, where the secret and mysterious Hanimi people have children who have never seen a white man's erect penis. Of course, we're always looking for kids to have sex with on the plane rides over to these places, so how would you ALL like to join the Super Adventure Club!
Stan: NO!
Mr. Connolly: No? Oh really? Perhaps I should ask you again? [whips out a portable hypnotizer and makes some whistling sound effects] How would you like to join the Super Adventure Club? [more sound effects]
!Stan: [unaffected] No! [Mr. Connolly tries harder, even stepping forward...]
Kyle: Dude, what are you doing?!
Mr. Connolly: [looks at his machine] Oh well, it doesn't work on everybody. [hides it behind his back] Well, so long then.
Kyle: Just what the hell is that thing?!
!. Connolly: What? What thing? I don't see anything.
Kyle: HA! I knew it!
Stan: Knew what?
Kyle: The reason Chef has been saying those terrible things about us is because he's been brainwashed! By this - fruity little club!
Cartman: Oh, son of a bitch!
To Be Continued...
