Chapter Six — Amicable Exhibitionism

"Show me."

"Show you what?" Abed said. He must have known what Jeff had meant, but at the same time must have thought that Jeff couldn't possibly have meant that.

"I've never seen a dick as big as yours and I want to see it. So I dare you to show it to us."

Abed was reluctant to obey, just like before when he had to remove his pajama pants during Strip Poker, or when he had to show his ass to the passersby on the street.

"I showed you mine," Jeff said, while wondering if the hesitation Abed demonstrated now was caused simply by his tendency to imitate the behavior of the people around him, or if Abed authentically felt the wish to keep his intimacy intimate. But in the next moment, Abed pulled at his tighty whities and exposed his genitals to the curious gaze of Jeff's and the longing gaze of Troy's.

"Wow," Jeff said, admiring the flaccid thing that lay on the floor more than he dared to admit. "And you're not even hard.—In your place, I would probably use every chance to whip it out and boast with it." And after a few seconds, he added, "It's alright now, Abed. You may, uhm, ‚whip it in'."

Abed grabbed his penis and was about to restore it to its place, when he suddenly stopped his movements, contemplating the object in his hand. "You know ...," he slowly said, as if deeply immersed in thought, "there's one more thing I always wanted us to do."

Jeff cast an inquiring glance at Troy, but his friend could neither avert his eyes from Abed's dick nor answer Jeff's questioning gaze.

"What I'm going to propose now might sound strange to you," Abed went on, "and I hesitate to say it out loud because its mere proposition might damage our friendship."

Jeff waited for his friend to go on, but it took a few more seconds of silence before Abed felt ready for that. "Many guys, even the best of friends, wouldn't probably ever think of doing this together, although almost everybody does it, many talk about it and it's a perfectly natural thing to do. But since it concerns a very intimate matter—"

Abed had more to say, but Jeff had guessed what Abed intended, so he took this burden off of his shoulders by interrupting him and saying, "You want us … to jerk off together, right?"

Abed looked up, nodded, and said, "Yes." And he hurriedly added, "But if you don't want to, please forget I ever said it."

Jeff hadn't ever done this before—in his current state of drunkenness, he would have told them before, when he was asked about the gayest thing he'd ever done—and he certainly wouldn't have done this now, had he been sober.

But he wasn't. On the contrary, he was very drunk.

And Troy and Abed were his best friends. It had been a long time since he had friends he trusted as blindly as he trusted those two.

And they had already seen his dick, and he had seen a lot of inches from his friends.

And then Jeff remembered something Abed had said earlier that evening, about friends you feel so comfortable around that you feel comfortable enough to do rather strange things with them, like playing Strip Poker without women or like playing Twister or Truth or Dare. Or like jerking off together.

So Jeff was barely surprised when he felt his own body's standing up to to take off his underpants and heard his own voice's saying, "I'm in. After this evening, that's no big deal anymore."

He had already put his thumbs into the fabric, ready to strip it off, when Troy suddenly, and with a surprisingly sad voice, said, "Abed, I ... I can't."

The smile on Abed's face died immediately and was replaced by a shameful staring at the floor. He covered his penis and said, probably feeling like a pervert, "That's alright. I understand that. This is not something everybody is comfortable with." But then he looked at Troy and said, "Though I thought that it would be Jeff who wouldn't want to do it.—We two, Troy, we're so close to one another—"

Troy interrupted him, explaining, "I want you to know, Abed, that I do want to ... that I dreamt of doing things like this with you ... But I ... But it's ... You want us to do this as friends ... I want us to do this as ... as ..." He sighed. "It's difficult to explain ... Even if I was sober, I probably couldn't say it properly ..."

Jeff was surprised by Troy's reluctance. He had thought that Troy would love to do this. In fact, he had always thought that the two had already done this a few times. After all, the two were not only best friends, but also shared one bedroom, one bathroom, some strange interests and obviously had no problems talking about their penile measurements.

So ... why was Troy so hesitant?

Was it because of himself, because of Jeff? Did Troy not want to share this intimate moment with an intruder like him? Was Troy ... simply jealous? If that happened to be the case, all Jeff had to do was leave. Jeff would have to suddenly 'remember' an important meeting or something in the morning and all problems would be solved, everybody would be happy.

But then he thought of something else:

Abed had said that he wanted to do this as friends. And maybe this was the problem. Maybe this was something Troy could not do as friends, but only as lovers, or at least if Abed knew that Troy considered him as more than a friend. If that happened to be the case, then they couldn't share in this activity: If Troy told Abed that he loved him, it could seriously hazard their friendship, as Troy had explained before. But otherwise, if Abed were to remain ignorant of Troy's tender feelings, he would have to believe that his best friend considered him a pervert. That might have the same dire consequences.

So Troy had to act carefully. And seeing how Troy babbled unintelligibly, Jeff knew: If left alone, his two friends would not be able to avoid this iceberg. So he had to take the helm and steer them carefully into the only safe direction, to the place where Abed knew about Troy's love.

Jeff 'Cupido' Winger moved from the couch and sat down on the floor to be on the same level with them. "Troy, may I?—Abed, I have on Truth to ask from you. Even if it is not my turn."

"Uh, yeah, go on," Abed said, obviously confused by how this evening had developed after his suggestion.

"You said before, that your greatest fear was something happening to Troy, or him leaving you."

Abed looked at Troy, who returned the gaze. "Yes, I did."

"I ask of you now: What would you do if he left?"

"I don't want to think about that," Abed said, now fixing the floor with his eyes.

"You have to."

"I ... I … I don't know. I don't want him to leave. I don't want anything bad to happen to him. Troy's my best friend. I'd rather have something bad happen to me than to him." After a pause, he added, "I don't have nightmares about me dying—but of him."

Troy seemed disconcerted by this, but Jeff calmly said, "Wow, that's—in a morbid way—very romantic.—You know, Abed, if you left Troy, it would hurt him just as much."

"That's ridiculous, I wouldn't do that. I wouldn't wanna hurt him."

"No matter what?—What if he said he no longer liked Kickpuncher? What if he said he preferred the American Inspector Spacetime?"

Abed and Troy exchanged glances, then looked, both appalled and disgusted by the sheer absurdity of the idea, at Jeff.

"He would never say that," Abed said. Then he paused, and, slowly turning his head to Troy, added, "But even if he did, I'm sure he'd have sensible reasons. It wouldn't change a thing."

Jeff was very glad to hear that. Sentences such as these had to convince Troy that he could profess his love without having to fear permanent damage to their relationship.

Abed looked at Jeff, inclined his head and said, squinting, "What are you getting at?"

His remark was ignored by Jeff, who said, "Troy, you heard him. He wouldn't leave you, even if you became a fan of that-which-must-not-be-named." He added with a smile, "If there's anything you wish to tell him, I'd say: Go ahead."

Troy nodded, smiling in return thankfully at Jeff, then looked at Abed, wet his lips with his tongue and began, "Abed ..."

Jeff wanted to get up, "I'll leave you alone for this," but he was stopped by Troy.

"No, please stay, I might need your help.—Abed ... There's a reason why I didn't want to do this with you ... yet ... There's something I needed you to know before." He took a deep breath, paused, exhaled and took another deep breath before saying, "We've been best friends for years, and you've become an important part of my life ... more than that ..."

Abed suddenly turned his head away, looked at the floor and interrupted him, saying, "You love me, don't you?"

Troy, taken aback, answered after a moment of silence, "Yes, I do. … More than anything."

Slowly looking farther away from Troy, Abed said, "I don't— I'm sorry, I don't love you."

For a few seconds, nobody said anything. Jeff heard the heavy breathing of Troy's.

"I've been suspecting for some time now," Abed went on. "And I had thought—and I had hoped—that you wouldn't ever tell me." He sighed. "I said before that I don't want to ever hurt you, but now you force me to. I can't requite your love, Troy." After a moment of silence, he added, "I can try and I will try to make you happy, but only as a friend."

Troy somehow seemed prepared for this answer. He stood up, sat down next to Abed and put an arm around his shoulder, gazing at the averted head of his friend. "Don't worry about that. I don't ask you to love me back. I only wanted you to know."

Abed suddenly started smiling, turned around and looked into Troy's eyes.

"Just as you felt that I love you," Troy went on, "I felt that you don't love me. I didn't expect you to love me back. But as long as we continue being friends, that's more than I could ever ask for."

Then something happened that Jeff considered to be one of the most beautiful things he ever saw:

In the exact same moment, each laid his left hand on his own chest, while stretching out his right hand. And they did their special little handshake.

This scene raised in Jeff an irresistible urge to say 'Aw!'. So to suppress that sound, he said jokingly, "And now I dare the both of you to kiss," causing the both of them to twitch and look at Jeff. But then they looked at each other and Troy whispered, "Just this once."

Abed looked blankly at Troy, thinking, then nodded slightly. They both inclined their heads slightly to the right, slowly bent forward, closed their eyes—and for the fraction of a second their lips met.

Jeff envied Troy at that moment immeasurably. He could but imagine the happiness his friend must have felt. Troy's heart might have been broken now, but he had been prepared for it. And Abed would help him mend it. This result was most satisfactory, although Jeff had hoped—though considered it very unlikely—that Abed would love Troy as well and would have just needed a little nudge to realize this.

Suddenly, Jeff felt like the third wheel. His two friends probably had some things to discuss—and maybe some other things to do, whatever they might be—, so he got up and said, "You guys probably want to spend some time alone."

He was about to go to the bedroom, get his clothes and leave, when he was stopped by Abed. "Why? I thought we were going to masturbate together?"

"You still want to?" Troy and Jeff asked at the same time.

"Why shouldn't we?" Abed said.

Troy explained his reasons. "Well, now that you know that I'm gay ... wouldn't that feel awkward? I mean, it would be somewhat unfair, 'cause I'd enjoy this WAY more than you.—You guys would do this as pals who are comfortable enough around each other to do these things. But for me, this is gonna be some kind of orgy. And with Abed being around, it just gets hotter for me."

"I don't mind about that," Jeff said. "Just don't get too bold," he finished, laughing.

"I don't care either," Abed stated. He added, directed at Troy, "The more you enjoy it, the more reason for me to do it."

Troy now had a broad smile on his face, in his mind probably rubbing his hands.