"You aren't assigning any books?" Hermione asked over the lunch table. The students had just received their supply list for the new school term and were surprised, and happy for some, that there weren't any books relating to alchemy at all.

"Nope, everything's up here," Edward tapped his head. "Besides, you'd need an entire library books if you wanted to truly learn about alchemy. There aren't any 'alchemy for beginners' books."

Everyone looked relieved. Except for Hermione, who was mildly disappointed. She loved books.

"But I thought Alchemy was an optional subject for sixth and seventh years?" Ron asked. Ginny stopped in her mimicking of Ed, a 'tell me it isn't so' look on her face.

Ed shrugged. "Dumbledore hasn't told me anything yet. But there shouldn't be an age limit for learning." He took another bite of Mrs Weasley's delicious roast chicken. Didn't beat Winry's apple pie, though. Nothing did.

"Yes!" Ginny pumped her fist. "Still a chance!"

"So what are you going to be teaching?" Fred asked.

"Just the basics, really. Stuff that every alchemist should know."

"Like...?" George prodded.

"You ain't getting a head start."

"Damn it!" both cursed at the same time.

"Are you going to be teaching about the alchemical symbols?" Harry asked. Ed still couldn't figure out the boy's deal. First, he came in spouting knowledge on stuff Ed's never seen before, then goes on to forget everything completely? And now he's curious about learning alchemy, which he already knew, or didn't know? It didn't make any logical sense.

"Maybe. If you exceed my expectations, it's possible you may get to learn how to use basic transmutation circles," Ed told them. Then he laughed. "I wouldn't bet on it, though."

"Circles? Aren't we going to just clap our hands and, woosh!?" Ginny asked, demonstrating to Ed his own transmutation technique.

"Nope," Ed shook his head. "That's an... advanced technique. There's no way any of you are going to be able to do it."

"How d'you know?" Ron asked, defiant. "You haven't seen us in action yet."

"Don't need to," Ed confidently stated.

"Then how'd you do it?" Fred questioned.

"Lots of studying," he lied. "And talent."

"We could be talented too, you don't know," Harry spoke up, to the nods of the rest of the room. "'Sides, you're only fifteen, how much studying could you have done?"

"We- I started when I was four." Ed hoped they didn't notice the slip up. They didn't, instead just looking shocked. "Mom said I had an unnatural talent for it," he found himself saying.

Then, everyone heard a loud wailing from the floor above. The cry stunned most in the room, but Edward was not one of them. Sprinting full speed out of the kitchen before anyone could react, he leaped up the stairs two at a time, and dashed down the hall, skidding into the room that the wail was coming from.

Molly laid on the ground, trying to crawl away from the mangled body of Ron, sobbing as she did so. She clutched her wand, pointed it at Ron's body, and yelled, "Riddikulus!"

A quick crack, and the body morphed into one Bill Weasley, still as equally mangled as the previous body. What the fuck?! Ed couldn't help but think.

"Riddikulus!" she cried out again, choking on her tears. The body shifted from Bill to Fred, and she cried even harder. "Riddikulus!" Fred now. Then George.

No... Ed watched in disbelief. His brain clocked into overtime. This has to be just an illusion, a trick... He crouched, grabbing the sobbing Molly by her shoulders. "Don't look at it, Mrs Weasley!" he urged.

She remained transfixed in her sorrow, and cried 'Riddikulus' once again. Harry appeared last, the lifeless green eyes staring directly at her.

Ed cursed inwardly and stepped forward, ready to transmute his signature blade from his automail arm. Harry's body spun and morphed once again.

The body was now hideous, black and unrecognizable. It stared at the blonde, head twisted upside down, arms and legs twisted and broken beyond belief, and massive bones protruded out of what would be its chest. Harry, the real living one, appeared in the doorway at this moment, looking horrifically between Mrs Weasley, Edward and the monster on the ground.

Ed was frozen in place. He couldn't tear his eyes away from this creature from his darkest nightmares. "Ed-" the thing began to croak.

"No!" Ed clapped his hands and slapped them onto the ground. Blue lightning coursed the room, and the wood around Edward began to shoot forth and engulf the thing, enclosing it in a tight, wooden dome. He remained in that position, looking straight down at the ground, cold sweat forming around his head. That nightmare was over. Acutely aware of the weight of his pocket watch, he staggered to his feet, as Lupin, Sirius and Moody stomped into the room.

All the voices in the room were muffled as Ed's brain absorbed the shock of seeing that thing again. Memories of that night surfaced; the dreadful eyes staring right into his soul, the pile of clothes where Alphonse once was, the sudden pain of his missing leg.

The way it cried out his name.

No. An inner voice whispered. That was not her. You saw it for yourself.

Edward tried to force out a laugh. "Yeah, I dug it up..." he muttered.

And you saw it transform.

"Yeah..."

So it's not real.

Ed remained silent.

So what the hell are you afraid of?

"Edward!" the blond snapped back to reality, Sirius waving a hand in front of his face. "I think he's in shock," he told Lupin and Moody.

"Huh?" Sirius looked back at Ed when he made that noise.

"You alright, kid? Heard what I said?" Sirius asked, staring into Ed's golden eyes.

"Yeah, yeah," Ed shook the man off him. "I am shocked, or something."

Sirius glanced at Lupin and Moody, then shrugged. "Good enough, I guess."

"What the hell is that?" Ed demanded, regaining some of his composure. His pep-talk monologue helped. Moody's eye swiveled to the wooden dome.

"A boggart." Lupin answered. "A creature that takes the form of your worst fear."

Edward glanced at Moody, confirming the fact that the latter saw what happened with his magical eye. "So, what, it just looks into my brain and picks it out?"

Lupin nodded. "We think as much. Never got around to asking one how it works."

The boy managed a weak smile. "So what was it?" Sirius asked. "Harry told us it was some horribly disfigured body but was still alive-"

"Sirius!" Lupin scolded.

"What? You can't tell me you're not a little bit curious?" Sirius defended himself. Moody stayed silent throughout, both eyes intensely studying Edward.

"My mom." The two adults ceased their arguing and looked at the boy. "She was killed in a terrible accident," he told them. It was half-true. If you looked at it from a very specific angle.

"Sorry..." Sirius apologized, lowering his head.

"Don't be," Ed told him. He stared at the dome. "How do we kill it?"

"Well, you can't-" Sirius tried to say, but Lupin stopped him.

"Leave it to me." Sirius gave a puzzled look at Lupin, and the man shook his head every so slightly. Ed nodded, taking his place where the wood shot out from the ground, Lupin standing in front of him, wand at the ready. With a clap, the dome started to unravel. Ed locked eyes with the creature for just a brief moment, before the boggart morphed once more, into a glowing sphere hanging in front of Lupin. With a firm 'Riddikulus!' and a sharp wave of his wand, the orb vanished.

Ed slowly walked past Lupin, toward the spot where the boggart was. The adults in the room hesitated, then decided Ed could use some time alone. Thanks, Edward mouthed. The uneven stomping of Moody paused for a split second before finally leaving the room.

Ed knelt down, palming the ground. Worst fear? No, that wasn't why the day was so haunting.

It was about Al.

It was always about Al. The price Ed paid was nothing compared to Al's. And yet Al still treated him like a brother. How? Why? And how could he be so insistent on getting his body back only and only if Ed could do the same?

"How can I repay you, brother mine? How can I expect you to forgive?" The words flowed out of Ed, uncontrollable.

"Clinging to the past, I shed our blood, and shattered your chance to live..." Harry and the rest poked their head out, wondering how Ed was doing.

"Though I knew the laws, I paid no heed. How can I return your wasted breath?" The group, hearing this, knew they shouldn't be here. This was private, but they were entranced by the melody.

"What I did not know has cost you dear, for there is no cure for death." Edward continued. His pocket watch seemed to get heavier as regret and sorrow surfaced.

"Beautiful mother, soft and sweet. Once you were gone we were not complete." He felt a tingling sensation in his automail. "Back through the years we reached for you. Alas, 'twas not meant to be..."

Harry felt someone tug at his shirt; Hermione urging them to go. But Harry couldn't. There was a beautiful sadness in Ed's voice that Harry felt connected to. "And how can I make amends? For all that I took from you?"

"I led you with hopeless dreams. My brother, I was a fool."

The cold, wooden floor was Ed's only companion that night.