**A/N: So with the trailer for Civil War out, I was able to make a lot of decisions on the tone of the plot and... THE TITLE FOR THE NEXT STORY. It's going to be called 'Through the Storm', and if you want a sense of the tone of the story, listen to the Jonas Brothers feat. Miley Cyrus' 'Before the Storm'. It'll give you a taste of what to expect. This is will be one of the biggest obstacles for them to overcome, and a lot of things will be questioned in their lives and their relationship.

Super short chapter. The shortest I've ever posted. Making it any longer would have made it forced, however.

Chapter 25- Tie Me To Your Apron Strings

"Please take me back tonight where I belong. I thought that I was right but I was wrong tears away from day to day. Bring back all those happy hours when you kissed me for e upon your knee. Tie me to your apron strings again, I know there's room."

~Tie Me To Your Apron Strings Again, Eddy Arnold


Natasha and Clint had returned Jamie to their apartment late the night before. All three of the Rogers were exhausted, each having an amazing night of sleep. Morning came way too soon, Jamie's frustrated cries piercing through the baby monitor, Bethany pulling herself out of bed before Steve could even consider it. She couldn't help but giggle under her breath as she casted him a gaze, his hair standing up and mouth hanging open with exhaustion. She had never seen him like that before, and it made her giddy to think that she had a hand in that.

She had time to dress Jamie and feed him breakfast and even brush her own teeth, Jamie balanced on her hip before Steve finally stirred. Bethany sat at her vanity, Jamie on her lap, watching as Steve moaned and groaned, struggling to get out of the bed through the mirror.

"There's no rush," Bethany promised him. "Sleep all morning if you want."

Steve let out a long and loud yawn, stretching his arms. "Already wasted too much time," he said, his voice quiet.

"It's only 9:30," Bethany said with a frown.

"Exactly," came his stubborn response.

"Did you hate it?" Bethany asked, as she handed Jamie his little baby brush, picking up her own and combing her hair. Jamie looked at his mother before following her movements on his own head. Slowly, the baby was starting to do things for himself, and he seemed to love the newfound freedom.

"No," Steve admitted, clearly thinking back to the night before. "Seeing you like that... I like to know I'm the only one who can bring you to those highs."

"I know," Bethany said with a chuckle. "That's why I did that."

"I'm not going to lie, you saw how much I... enjoyed your little show," Steve began. "But it was torturous in its own way. Consider us even."

"You're not just saying that right?" Bethany pressed on, putting down her brush. Jamie mimicked her actions, craning his head up to see what she would do next.

"No, I'm not," Steve promised, pushing off the bed and moving to kiss her softly. "And I wouldn't lie especially since you reminded me about the condom."

"I'm not planning on tricking you into having kids," Bethany quickly assured.

"I know," Steve promised. "But it was nice to know that even when I'm not thinking clearly, you are."

"I wasn't thinking that clearly, but I knew that we'd fight if I didn't speak up. I want you to be happy when I get pregnant again."

"Hey," he began, cupping her chin. "I would be happy. We'd be having a baby, Beth. Me not wanting a kid now doesn't mean I wouldn't be happy if it happened. I loved seeing you pregnant. Now, can I make you breakfast? French toast maybe?"

"I'm getting rewarded?" Bethany asked with a huge smile.

"Me making you food shouldn't be a reward. I want to help out more. Let me help out more," Steve begged, a concerned look in his eyes.

"Well, I'm not turning away food," Bethany said, her smile now threatening to split her face. "Hey, umm… Are we going to do that again?"
Steve seemed to think it over tentatively before letting out a heavy sigh. "Can I get back to you on that?"

"Yeah, of course," Bethany nodded, narrowly dodging her head from Jamie's hands, which were wildly moving up and down as he babbled to himself. "And there's always those other toys to play with, if the moment ever calls for them."

"I was worried that there would be something in that bag for me that I wouldn't like," Steve admitted, scratching the back of his head.

"Well, I considered that but-" her voice broke off as a loud crack sounded, followed by Jamie's piercing howls. Bethany froze after she turned her head, not able to comprehend what to do. Jamie was stronger than the average child, and his force had been brought down against a handheld mirror, the surface cracking and a shard catching his hand, slicing it open. The only thing she could do as Jamie cried and blood trickled down his hand was repeatedly say "oh my God".

Steve quickly pulled Jamie into his arms, rushing to the bathroom, yelling at her to follow him. At first, she didn't hear him, not reacting at all, but when he yelled her name one more time, this time with his Captain's voice, Bethany jolted back to reality, quickly joining them in the bathroom. Steve had Jamie's hand under the running water, and despite Jamie's continuous crying, the red soon became pink and then the water clear as all the blood was washed away, the slice stitching itself back together.

Bethany wanted to cry, but she couldn't quite pinpoint if it was for gratitude or knowing what this could entail. Jamie's face was red and scrunched up, mouth wide open as he let his cries be known to the world. Steve, knowing that Bethany could comfort him better than he could, placed Jamie in his mother's arms.

"Stop your crying," Bethany whispered, kissing the top of Jamie's head. "You're okay. You're okay."

But even the words weren't comforting to Bethany, so she had no idea how they could be comforting for him.

Carrying their laundry basket filled with sheets into the living room, Steve caught the end of Bethany's phone conversation with Kiley. "Alright, well you let me know then. Okay, bye."

"Everything okay?" Steve asked as she hung up, while placing the basket on the coffee table.

"She said not to visit her this week," Bethany said, her voice a little distant with thought. "I don't know if that's a red flag or not. She said I should spend the time with little worries focused on things here."

"Did she sound okay?" Steve asked in return.

Bethany thought about it for a moment before nodding, slipping her phone into her back pocket before joining him. She pulled a sheet out of the basket and the two of them began to fold it. "Yeah, she sounded fine, actually. But that only worries me even more. She was adamant that I stayed here. Did you call her?"

"I did, yes," Steve revealed. "I just told her that if she needs anything to call me instead of you, since you're so stressed out lately."

"You didn't have to do that," Bethany mumbled.

"No, you're right. I didn't. But I did anyways because I'm worried about you," Steve explained. "I'm your husband, it's my job to take care of you. I just want you to feel more at peace, and if I can take some of your worries away from you, I'm gonna do it."

Silence fell over them as they finished folding all the sheets in the basket before Bethany stepped up onto the couch and placed her hands on Steve's shoulders. "Thank you," she said seriously.

"Of course," Steve replied honestly, placing his hands on her hips. "Beth, I want you to be happy and healthy. Let me help you."

"You are," she promised him with a shy smile.

"Is there anything else I can help you with?" He offered.

She nodded, reaching into her sweater pocket and pulling out a long list. "Groceries? Please? I have some things around here that I need to deal with, and you know how much I hate using the service to order our groceries."

Letting out a long and teasing sigh, Steve took the list from her fingers. "Do you want me to take Jamie off your hands too?"

"No, I've got him, but maybe check up on Theo and Jen? I bet she's dying to get some fresh air, and this would be a good chance to do it? Maybe take Clint or Thor with you too?"

"I'll ask around," Steve nodded, placing his hands on Bethany's waist, lifting her up and placing her on the ground. "And no standing on the couch."

"You're no fun," Bethany teased, turning to walk away, Steve grabbing his opportunity and laying a firm slap against her ass. She jumped, turning back to him with a wide and shocked smile. "I stand corrected," she backtracked with a chuckle in her voice.

"Sam is supposed to come sometime later today," Steve revealed as Bethany picked Jamie up from his play pen, the little boy's hands gripping onto his Hulk toy. "But he has to leave Saturday night."

"Before the party?" Bethany asked with a frown.

"During," Steve corrected, folding the grocery list and shoving it into his back pocket. "Some family thing he has to do Sunday morning."

"Fair enough," Bethany nodded, taking her phone out of her back pocket when it vibrated. "I've been summoned to the lab. And told to also bring food."

"There's a big Tupperware of fruit in the fridge," Steve suggested, picking up the laundry basket. "Last I saw them, they were both stuffing their faces with Dr. Pepper and Doritos."

Following his instructions, Bethany took out the fruit, said a brief goodbye to Steve before heading up, Jamie babbling nonsense to her the entire time. "Any luck?" Bethany asked when she entered the lab, smelling a faint burning odor. "What's burning?"

"Nothing… Anymore," Tony claimed. "Food?" Bethany placed the Tupperware on a clear surface and pulled the lid off. "Ew, fruit?"

"Yes, fruit," Bethany scolded, picking up a blueberry and holding it out for Jamie. He opened his mouth for her, moving his neck forward to close his lips around it, giving Bethany his huge gapped-tooth smile and a laugh when he tasted it. To Steve's pleasure, Jamie loved fruits. Getting him to eat healthy was not an issue. They barely had to force or chide him into eating anything. He was always excited to try new things. Blueberries seemed to be his favorite out of everything, however.

"If the baby can eat it, and enjoy it, so can you," Bethany stated plainly. "Any progress?"

"Depends on how you define 'progress'," Bruce replied honestly.

"I… I define it the normal way?" Bethany questioned. "Why? What's going on?"

"Well, we figured out some ways to integrate the intelligence into the program, we just haven't had any success. And every time we're about to reach a success, the entire program crashes and wipes itself," Bruce explains. "Almost like it refuses to do this."

"Like it's consciously making the decision?" Bethany asked.

"No," Tony began, in that voice he used a lot before mocking Steve's intelligence.

"It's artificial intelligence," Bethany pointed out. "Theoretically, it should be aware of what's going on, right? Shouldn't that be a red flag?"

"Once we integrate it, we'll be able to control it," Tony said with a shrug. "We just need to force it in there."

"Have you never seen The Incredibles?" Bethany found herself asking, Jamie taking a hold of Bethany's shirt and pulling it. She took this as a cue to give him another blueberry, which she did. "They tried to control that giant robot thingy, but it took on a mind of its own. Or Short Circuit!"

"Johnny Five was a good guy," Bruce pointed out.

"Yeah, with homicidal tendencies," Bethany mumbled.

"That's not going to happen," Tony said with a wave of his hand. "JARVIS is keeping a close eye on everything. Stop being so negative all the time."

"It's called being realistic and prepared," Bethany corrected, spotting Cho outside the lab, gesturing for her attention. "Keep me up-to-date. And eat the damn fruit."

"Yes mom," Tony replied. Bethany only rolled her eyes, taking a handful of blueberries with her and meeting Helen outside.

"Have you seen this profile?" Helen excitedly began, holding the tablet open for Bethany. "Teagan Madyzee?"

"Doesn't ring a bell," Bethany said, offering the berries for Jamie, the boy's chubby little fingers taking one. "What's her idea?"

"She has ideas to modify your blood and DNA so that it can be adapted to heal and re-create vital organs. If she succeeds, compared with my regeneration cradle? We could offer so much to this world. I can only recreate tissue. This would be giving cancer patients and amputees so much more."

All while she was talking, Bethany was quickly reading the summary of Teagan Madyzee's proposal. When SHIELD fell, a lot of her medical files were leaked, and even when Tony worked to seal them, a lot got out for sale on the black market. While Bethany didn't think this was the case with the information and ideas that Teagan was proposing, what really stuck out Bethany was how Teagan theorized some ways to isolate the serum in her system, and possibly allow Bethany to age while still having her regeneration.

"We should definitely talk to her," Bethany nodded. "These are all theories, but her proposal is all things I've never seen before. But just because her idea benefits us the most, doesn't mean we throw the money at her."

"Understood," Cho nodded. "But I would love to work with her. Like I said, the regeneration cradle can only print tissue. She could open the door to so much more."

"You don't have to read through all of those, by the way. Take a break." Bethany told Helen, Jamie taking another blueberry.

"This is taking a break," Cho said with a slight frown. "Don't you like to read over scientific proposal for breaks?"

"No, not really," Bethany replied, Helen shrugging before walking away. "Alrighty then. Look at you, eating all those blueberries Jamie."

The baby looked up at her, his blue eyes looking up to her. They all assumed that Jamie's eyes would be blue, but now that the steel baby blue color had cleared up, his irises were the same color as Steve's, a beautiful crystal blue. "What about Momma? Can Momma have one?" Bethany asked, opening her mouth for a moment. Jamie took a blueberry and popped it into Bethany's mouth, the mom trapping his fingers between her lips for a moment. Jamie pulled them out, laughing like it was the funniest thing that ever happened.

"You're so silly," Bethany said, kissing his nose softly.


Now that Bethany had introduced Jen to Jamie, both Steve and Bethany thought it would be good for Theo and Jen to spend time in their apartment. Jen had been working on some plans with Pepper, before the redhead went on a work trip, on creating a temporary home for Jen and Theo to stay at until Jen finally got back on her feet. Bethany was still wary about Jen being around her son, but the woman kept her respectful distance, and with Steve, Clint, Natasha, Thor and Sam also in the apartment, she knew that Jamie was safe.

Jamie had some odd fascination with Sam that no one could understand. All the man had to do was look at Jamie and the baby would break out into a fit of giggles. Bethany and Steve had made the decision a few weeks ago that if anything were to happen to them, they'd want to leave Jamie with Sam. His loyalty and good heart made him an easy candidate, but compared to everyone else, he was the one who could best take care of Jamie. They weren't sure if Tony would step up to the responsibility, and it would just be a burden for everyone else. Seeing that Jamie was so enraptured with him only made Bethany rest a little easier.

"It's nice that the men are doing the cooking," Natasha said, sliding into the chair beside Bethany. Steve and Thor were working in the kitchen, Thor mostly just tasting everything that Steve was making.

"Yeah. He's trying to make life easier for me, even though I actually don't mind cooking," Bethany said with a chuckle, picking up her glass filled with gin and taking a sip. "But I don't mind seeing him in that apron."

Natasha chuckled. "It is a comical thing to see. So what's going on with you? How you feeling today?"

Bethany looked over to where Sam was playing with Jamie, the baby's face red from laughing so much. "It's weird. It's like the worst emotional rollercoaster, but it's not just anger and happiness. It's… being alone and helpless even if you're not."

"I know what that's like," Natasha replied honestly.

"I know you do," Bethany offered lightly. "How do you overcome that?"

"I still struggle," Natasha admitted with a light shrug. "Being on the battlefield, running a mission… all that helps. That scares you though, doesn't it? That the only way to feel normal is not be?"

Bethany took in a shaky breath, taking a heavy sip of her drink. For a moment, she could feel it taking a toll on her brain, but it quickly passed. "It's different now. I can't… kill. I see these people and I can't help but wonder about their life and their stories. Becoming a mother was the worst thing that could have ever happened to the agent in me. How can I recapture that feeling of being in control when I can't even complete a mission with no feelings?"

"You just need to find something here that helps you feel like you're continually in control and maybe it'll help you?" Natasha suggested.

Bethany smiled, thinking back to the night before. "I have some ideas."

"Oh, well that sounds promising," Natasha teased, her signature smirk gracing her features. "Are we still going to get our nails done tomorrow?"

"Of course," Bethany said after another sip. "If there's anything I learned from the 1940's styles is that red lipstick and nails will never go out of style."

"I'll drink to that," Natasha replied, lifting her glass up to touch Bethany's.

"So I think your son needs a break from laughing," Sam said, Bethany taking Jamie into her arms after she finished off her drink. "I mean, I get it. I'm a funny guy. But you'd think I was funny looking or something."

"Geesh, talk about being the last to know," Bethany teased with a wink. Sam laid a soft punch to Bethany's arm before being called over by Steve.

"Are you planning on just alienating her forever?" Natasha asked casually, looking over to where Clint, Theo and Jen were sitting by the window, looking at the cars below.

"She's in my apartment isn't she?" Bethany replied honestly. "You understand why I'm… skeptical, right?"

"Well," Natasha began, looking to her lap for a moment before continuing. "Not everyone who was behind enemy lines is the enemy."

Bethany sighed, seeing her mistake. "I'll give you that. But isn't everyone a little nervous when accepting someone back over?"

"Yeah, but you also need to treat them-"

"Tasha, I've been through all the variables," Bethany interrupted. "If it was just me and Steve, yes. I would be a whole lot more accepting. But it's not. It's my son. And those enemy lines were an organization that has threatened my son's life."

"You're right," Natasha said after a moment. "She knows that, though. I think she's really trying to give you space in order to earn your trust."

"Can we talk about something less depressing?" Bethany begged, wincing as Jamie lifted a hand up to touch her face. "Jamie, what are you doing?"

"Well, do you know what the men are doing with the sceptre? Or is that a depressing subject as well?"

Bethany shifted Jamie's position on her lap, one hand matting down his curls against his head. They only stayed down for a moment before springing up. "Just… running some tests. Seeing what they can do with it," Bethany offered. The look that Natasha gave her made Bethany's stomach flop. Her lie wasn't convincing enough. She was really losing her touch. She couldn't lie, she could barely flip like she used to, and she couldn't kill without feeling guilty.

Jamie babbled in her lap, looking up at her with those big beautiful blue eyes. He was intently telling her something in his own little language, a smile pulling at Bethany's lips. "Oh, now is that right? And then what happened?" She encouraged.

She was losing her past self. That woman who killed without thought, who could bend her body in ways deemed unnatural, and lie her way out of anything. Motherhood was changing her so much.

Natasha was right. That rush of being on a mission would never be replaced by anything, but as long as Bethany could find alternatives to that feeling, and maintain control over her life… could she really retire?

She didn't get that feeling that she used to get. Bethany would burst into Fury's office, or whoever was the director at the time and demand missions. She needed to fill the void of nothing. And when they had nothing to offer her, she would go to school, pick up a hobby, do anything to pass the time so she didn't have to think about everything she did. Her body and mind needed to constantly be focused on something.

I could retire, Bethany thought to herself. I think I could do it this time. I could actually do it.


**A/N: Just wanted you guys to understand Bethany's thoughts a little more before everything goes to shit :)

Cleo9427: "Huge" isn't exactly the word I'd use. I think you'll be surprised how they actually deal with it.

Twifan1987: Haha, yeah and Steve would have no one but himself to blame for that.

Anonymouscsifan: I don't think Bethany will ever admit how much she liked 1) him torturing her in Florida and 2) her torturing him.

Jo: With ease! That part came easy for me! I know Bethany's mind like my own at this point. I know exactly how it'll go down =)

FeliciaFelicis: Jamie was born almost 50 chapters ago! Haha. Almost a year ago too from when I posted that chapter. I was wondering where you were on that. Be honest; grammar and spell is really bad, eh? I went back and edited the first two chapters back in September, but I've been too busy to do the rest. It's my Christmas project however.

Wurlwind: I mean, she has a lot of GOOD legitimate reasons for thinking that Ultron was a good idea, and I won't let her forget them. Yay! I didn't fail with the smut, haha! Glad to know I could provide some good reading material.

ACBD: Yes, he'll be disappointed, but he'll also understand why. You'll see ;) Woo hoo for getting the blood flowing!