**A/N: Wait, what's THIS? A CHAPTER? DESPITE ME SAYING THERE WASN'T GOING TO BE? You'll see that I gave up on the smut and that the chapter is super short in response. And my betas are amazing and sent it back to me in record time. Also, I got my tickets for Civil War today (finally, but the first person in my town to get them so yay!) and Hayden Panettiere is back on Nashville feeding my feels. So here you go :)
Chapter 44- Cast Aside These Broken Hearts
"Take my hand, I'll show you something. I can't keep these feelings that I feel inside. I've changed my mind. Oh tonight, oh tonight. I feel, I feel alive. If these dreams take us nowhere then darling that's alright. We can make a new start, cast aside these broken hearts. Love songs were never meant for us. But tonight feels different, yes it does."
~Tonight Feels Different, Riley Smith
With the final death count in regards to Sokovia in, Maria and Bethany headed to D.C. to do some business. They had a lot of contracts and deals to settle with multiple government bodies, including a very long discussion with the President. Bethany didn't really want to be involved in all the processions, but she knew that someone from the team needed to be present to defend their side of the story. They didn't exactly trust Thor to be their voice, nor Tony. Natasha had been their voice for the fall of SHIELD, so they agreed that she was off the hook. Bruce was still MIA, but even if he wasn't, he wasn't on good terms with the government as it was. Clint was back at the farm, patiently waiting for Laura to give birth, although Laura had admitted to Bethany that she was less than patient at this point and was ready for it to be over. Bethany sympathized with her completely, remembering her own pregnancy and how it was actually a blessing that Jamie was born a month early. Since Vision was new to the team, and he wasn't even considered human, it was agreed by all that he shouldn't step near Washington until they figured out everything they could. For similar reasons, including being a HYDRA experiment, Wanda wouldn't be going.
All of that left Bethany and Steve. And in all fairness, Steve had gone to Washington the last time, even though they had specifically requested for Bethany to go. She had just given birth however, so Steve had faithfully taken her place. Steve had offered to go, but Bethany knew that it was only fair that she'd go this time. She had a relationship already established with most of the politicians, even though they weren't always good ones. She knew how to work most of them in the most professional manner.
This benefit hadn't made the visit any easier. Bethany hated what she was wearing, but Pepper picked out what she called a 'power outfit' but really just made Bethany feel ridiculously unattractive. But Pepper reminded Bethany that it was what she said that mattered, not how she looked. Even Steve had said "it's not that horrible," which confirmed Bethany's observations.
Their program was officially approved, despite the fact that they would have operated anyways. However, Bethany knew it would make Steve feel a little better knowing that the government, as of now, approved of what they were going to be doing. All things said however, they had a lot of concerns, especially due to Sokovia. Maria and Bethany had sweet-talked their way out of everything they could to end an overall successful day. It was long and tiresome and Bethany couldn't wait to just hop on the quinjet and go home to her family. They were going to move into the Facility the next day and Bethany knew it was going to be just as exhausting.
Maria had one more stop in regards to borrowing Rhodey from the army for the team, so Bethany excused herself to do her own errands. It had been months since she had seen either Peggy or Sharon Carter, so since she was in Washington, it only made sense that she spent a few extra hours in town to check in on her former best friend and someone she could very easily see becoming her future best friend, if they spent more time together.
Visiting Peggy was becoming too painful for both Steve and Bethany. Her memory was slipping away with each and every day, and Bethany wanted to spend as much time with Peggy as she could. Some days, Peggy would call Bethany to talk. Sometimes Steve. The couple liked those days, since it meant that Peggy's memory was with her. But Sharon had told Bethany that some days, Peggy didn't even know who she was.
"Look at his little duck waddle," Bethany mused, showing Peggy a video of Jamie walking around the apartment, his big diapered behind seemingly shaking as he took his steps.
"Oh, and look at those curls," Peggy chuckled. Today, Peggy was doing good. She had a giant smile on her face when Bethany came in and asked how Steve was doing. A nurse had told her that if Bethany had come an hour earlier, it would have been a completely different story.
"Despite the curls and the lips, he's all Steve," Bethany said proudly.
"How are you two? I saw the news about that place… what was it again?"
"Sokovia," Bethany replied. "And yeah, we're actually doing really good. I'm sure you don't want to hear all the lovey-dovey details."
"Look around," Peggy said with a chuckle. "It's better than the boring six walls around me."
Bethany frowned, looking around the room. "I'm sorry, six?"
"We're in a cube," Peggy laughed, a memory sparkling in her eyes. "Now spill."
"I don't know if there is something to spill," Bethany admitted. "We have a house being built for us in a semi-secluded area. It's not exactly the suburban dream Steve and I had a few years ago, but I'm really looking forward to it. It has a swimming pool, fire pit, beautiful balcony looking out over the property."
"Wow, you really went all out," Peggy replied softly. "You both deserve it."
"Thanks," Bethany whispered as Sharon popped her head into the room.
"Bethany, it's so good to see you," Sharon exclaimed as the two blondes met for a hug.
"You look good," Bethany noted when they pulled apart.
"You look…" Sharon began before eyeing Bethany's clothes and trailing off.
Bethany moaned, rolling her eyes. "Pepper thought the outfit I picked out originally was too sexy, even though it was completely conservative. Boobs weren't on display and the skirt wasn't too tight, but apparently it was still alluring. So she came up with this, since she knew I wanted the politicians to take me seriously."
"Yeah, but you might have gotten more if you dressed a little provocatively," Sharon said with a wink before carefully moving to sit by her aunt's side and attend to her.
The two women slid into a booth at a burger joint, Bethany shaking her head with amusement. "Still searching for that perfect cheeseburger?" Bethany teased.
"Not everyone can settle with a McDonald's burger and be happy," Sharon replied with a smirk.
"You sound like Steve," Bethany chuckled. "So what? I like their food. Sue me. Just because it isn't the healthiest of options doesn't make it taste any less good. It probably makes it taste better, let's be real."
"Steve and I beg to differ apparently," Sharon teased, opening the menu the waitress had handed them.
"If we ate the way he wants to eat, it would be all health super foods and nothing else," Bethany explained. "And you know how much I enjoy my junk food. Luckily, Jamie loves fruit and vegetables at least. Okay, enough husband and baby talk. Steve told me to take the night to relax, and I plan to do that."
"And that means no family talk?" Sharon teased.
"I don't get out very often," Bethany explained. "And even when I do, it's with Steve. It's nice to just be Bethany for one night, you know?"
"Not exactly," Sharon replied honestly. "But we can talk about work, if that's better? What were you in Washington for? Or am I not allowed to know?"
"No, that's part of the reason why I wanted to talk to you," Bethany admitted. "We're… reorganizing the Avengers. Making it a little more like SHIELD, but with the original values and focusing more on the bigger goal of saving people. Since I know that those things are important to you, I thought I might as well offer you a place. If you say no, I get it. But the job will never be off the table in the future."
Sharon closed her menu, Bethany slowly opening her own while Sharon mulled the option over. "I like where I am now," Sharon began. "It's not like SHIELD and I feel underappreciated sometimes, but I feel like great things are in store for me. Plus, if you ever need someone on the inside to be on your side, you can always count on me. I can get you meetings or convince some colleagues if need be."
Bethany nodded softly, giving the blonde a smile. "Like I said, the offer will always be on the table. But I'm glad that everything is working out for you."
"Did you get a lot of people to join so far?" Sharon asked as Bethany just decided to pick fries. She wasn't in the mood for burgers.
"According to Maria, yes," Bethany said with a nod. "I've been really busy lately, so me helping her wasn't exactly all that helpful, but everything seems to be going on pace for success."
"Are you going to be working there? Be an agent, or an Avenger?" Sharon asked curiously.
Bethany let out a soft sigh, closing her menu. "I'm going to be helping, but not as an official employee. I don't want to be sucked into that fully again. Popping in to help with recruits on occasion, give tips in the lab. It will give me more time to come have the occasional dinner with you."
"Ooh, sounds fun," Sharon said excitedly.
"You'll need to come see the new house too," Bethany continued. "Beautiful pool to have parties in. I wish it was ready for the Fourth of July, but looks like it won't be until August. But we'll have some end of the summer parties. If, you know, you aren't busy working all the time."
"And you definitely need to come here as well," Sharon insisted. "Aunt Peggy is lonely. The doctors say that she still has some time, but I'd hate for her to pass away feeling lonely and abandoned. I'm there as often as possible, but with work-"
"I know Steve wants to visit her soon," Bethany promised. "It's just… it's especially hard for him. If Pegs is having a bad day when I visit, she almost always knows exactly who I am. But for Steve, it's not the same. But he wants to."
"I think we have a year left, tops," Sharon confided. "So, don't let him wait too long."
Bethany looked down at her menu again, thinking that over. Their entire life seemed to be dictated by waiting. This was just another thing to add to the list.
"Well, I'm glad you at least had a good evening," Steve said as he dried his hands with the towel before hanging it back up and crawling into bed next to Bethany. "You definitely deserved a night away."
"What do you think of Sharon?" Bethany asked randomly, her fingers playing with the duvet.
"I don't really know her that well," Steve admitted.
"We were neighbours," she reminded him, laying her hands flat against the sheet. "We played Scrabble with her, and Wii bowling."
"But she was undercover," Steve reminded her, turning onto his side to face her. "I don't know how much that was her or just her cover."
"You should get to know her," Bethany pressed on. "I think you'd like her. You two are cut from the same cloth, in a way."
"Why does it seem like my wife is trying to hook me up with someone?" Steve asked slowly.
Bethany chuckled, turning on her side to mimic his position. "I'm not. I'm too possessive and jealous to share you anyways. I just really like her and I'd like to spend more time with her. I've known her since she was a little girl, but she's never really questioned me. She's always accepted who I am and that's really nice. I like knowing someone will always accept me."
Steve opened his mouth and Bethany knew fully well that he was about to state that he would always accept her, but he knew that the statement wasn't necessarily true. "You offered her a job, right?"
"Yeah, she turned it down. For now," Bethany replied. "Although, it could be very beneficial having someone like her on their side. She'll help us if we need anything, that I'm positive about. How was your day?"
"Pretty good," Steve nodded. "Got most of the stuff shipped out to the Facility. I tried to get Jamie to say Daddy today, but still no luck."
Bethany chuckled, curling up to her husband. "Babe, just because he said 'yes' when you told him to doesn't mean he'll do that for every other word," Bethany informed him.
"I can dream, can't I?" Steve asked, kissing her forehead. "Our last night here. You excited for our next adventure?"
"I am, actually," she replied, her fingers drawing lines on his stomach. "Moving onto our fourth home together. And the fifth. I'm more excited for the fifth."
Steve's laughter rumbled in his chest. "I am too. This is going to be good for us. Having a place of our own, building a sense of normalcy, even if it won't always be like that. By the way, are we bringing this bed with us? Tony wants to know."
"We have our mattress from the apartment in Washington," Bethany reminded him. "All that furniture is being shipped to the Facility and then we can pick what we want to keep or give away. But when we move into the house, everything will be new. I have my eyes set on this giant bed. It'll cost us a small fortune to have them ship it from Europe, but it's beautiful Steve. I saw it and immediately was lost in dreams about all the stuff we could do in that bed."
"I had to awkwardly explain to Tony why our tub is shattered," Steve added sheepishly. "I almost added that he's lucky it was just the bathtub."
"Wanna have some fun?" Bethany asked, pulling her head off his chest to look at him, her eyes laced with desire. "Maybe break the bedframe to show Tony just how lucky he was that it was just the tub."
"And the bedframe," Steve added, holding onto her hips tightly before flipping them over so he would hover over her.
"Mmm, this is just what I need after the day I had," Bethany mumbled as Steve leaned down to kiss the column of her neck, one of his hands moving down her hip and grabbing her upper thigh tightly, holding it to his body so his hips could press up against hers.
"I think you need a massage," Steve whispered against her ear, sending shivers up and down her spine. "You're so tense. Let me turn your body into goo."
Bethany smiled at his words, but more importantly, his tone. He was almost begging her to let him kiss every part of her body and work her body until it forgot how to move. Like she would ever need convincing for that. "I think I have some massage oils in the bathroom still," Bethany added, knowing that it was her responsibility to pack up the closets and bathrooms, and she had only finish half of each. The pressure of Steve's body disappeared as he went to the bathroom, rummaging through the cabinets, coming back with his arms full of more than just massage oils. He placed them on his pillow, not giving Bethany the chance to look at the collection as he quickly pulled off his shirt and laid it over them.
He looked at her, a deep sense of arousal in his eyes, before resuming his position, kissing her neck slowly, moving down her collarbone and back up, Bethany barely noticing as Steve pulled the little shorts she was wearing off her hips until his fingers brushed against her bare core softly, letting the tip of his nail drag across her clit. Her body arched towards his and he continued to slowly and softly work every single one of her nerves before moving off of her. The absence of his body made hers feel abandoned and cold, but he leaned down towards her ear and quietly told her to flip over. She followed his instructions, feeling him gently settle on her legs in a sitting position.
Bethany closed her eyes as she waited for Steve to rub the oils through his hands, warming them up before placing them on the flat of her back and working them deeply into her muscles. He didn't shy away from using strength to massage her in the least, it giving her a twinge of pain but followed by an amazing wave of relief. He grabbed her shoulders, gripping at the tightness and slowly working it out, moving down farther and farther. He massaged every square area of her back, turning Bethany into a weak pile of jello, her muscles so thoroughly worked through.
"Relaxed?" Steve whispered in a sultry tone.
"Very," she mumbled, a small grin on her face. "My body is in that waking up mode where reality hasn't set in yet."
Steve hands moved down her body farther, working at her legs. He separated them and Bethany's smile grew when she realized what Steve was doing. His body adjusted and she could feel his breath against her inner thigh, moving upwards in a languish speed. Her body let out a sigh of relief when his lips softly closed upon her swollen cunt, his kisses being light like a butterfly. It was as if he was softly tickling her, excitement working its way up into her body, reminding it of its ability to move. It was going to be one wild night.
Bethany had woken up feeling completely relaxed and distressed. Steve had worked her body into complete exhaustion, but there were no knots or worries pinned to her body. But as soon as they started packing the last of their stuff into the moving truck, Bethany became tense once again. Steve couldn't really blame her for being so overprotective and controlling, so he was casually trying to massage her shoulders throughout the day, but she was starting to shrug him off.
"Wow," Bethany whispered when their apartment was empty. All the furniture they were leaving behind had been hauled off anyways since Pepper was planning on redoing the entire floor. After the Ultron bots had their way with the walls and windows and Bethany and Steve had their way with the bathroom, it was decided that the entire room needed to be revamped. There was absolutely nothing left in its wake now.
Bethany was holding Jamie, who was sleeping against her shoulder softly, her hand rubbing soft circles on his back. Steve wrapped his arm around his family, kissing Bethany's forehead. "It looks so big now," Steve agreed.
"I guess we had a lot more stuff than we thought," Bethany whispered. "This is harder than I assumed it was going to be. Apartments have always been so easy to say goodbye to. Leaving them was second-nature. But this? This was our home. Where we started our family."
"It's always going to be here," Steve reminded her. "But now we'll be moving on into our own house. Be able to start new memories there. The house will mean more than this place."
"Yeah," Bethany said quietly, looking at the bare walls where her framed photos used to be. They were now packed tightly in multiple boxes where they'd stay until their house was finished being built. It was weird knowing she wouldn't see them for a few months. That she couldn't just walk into the living room to see Howard with his infamous smug smile on his face.
It was hard to know that she couldn't just go down or up a few floors to see her nephew anymore either. When Tony had originally offered Bethany and Steve a place at the Tower, they had been hesitant. The selling point, especially after the rise of HYDRA, was the safety they would get there. But at the same time, they really wanted a place of their own. Now that they were getting that, Bethany couldn't help but feel sad. Of course she was excited to finally have a place for her family that was just theirs, but she would miss not seeing Tony everyday. She had taken living in the Tower for granted. She had already pestered him about him and Pepper promising to come see them on every holiday, but it was clear that things would change in the next year. People drifted apart. It was a natural part of life. And just because you were family didn't exclude you from that. Bethany just didn't want Tony to drift from her life the way Howard did.
"Change is always scary," Steve began. "And I know it really scares you, but you're excited for what's to come right?"
"Yeah," Bethany nodded. "I'm also terrified, but I know this is right. Not just for you, me or Jamie but for everyone. I don't know, maybe Tony will finally marry Pepper. Maybe everyone will finally just… find themselves. The past year was an adventure, but this change is desperately needed."
"I agree," Steve replied. "But we can come back and visit Tony whenever you want. Even if he makes the decision to move to California again."
"Trust me, you wouldn't be able to keep me from visiting Tony no matter how hard you tried," Bethany teased, nudging him with her hip before sighing. "I guess we should go."
"I'll go get Molly," Steve replied, picking up the cat carrier and going to Jamie's room. Molly was sleeping by the window, her head pressed up against the glass, soaking in the sun. She wasn't too pleased when Steve took her from the warmth and placed her in her carrier, but it was finally time to move on. Looking around Jamie's room for a minute, it felt like the year had flown by. Bethany was right. This was very much a huge part of their life, their beginning as a family. He had so many memories of Jamie in that room, no matter how small. They were all important to him, like the day he realized just how much he looked like Bethany when he slept or just how much poop could come out of someone that tiny. It was hard saying goodbye to the Tower. The two apartments he and Bethany had shared beforehand were easy to leave. Yes, there were memories laced inside their walls, but none like the Tower held.
Everything was changing, and despite the future being exciting, it was also uncertain. No one knew what it would hold. But Steve was damn well sure of two things. One; he wasn't going to let his family fall apart and two; he wasn't going to let the world go to hell.
He just hoped he'd never have to pick one over the other.
musicjunkie1996: He will soon! I really want their next pregnancy to be planned to help them take some kind of control over their life and future together :)
Jo: I know exactly when he'll get a sibling ;)
Sarahmichellegellarfan1: I will be in the next story! I'm really looking forward to that.
anonymouscsifan: Haha Steve is very hot! I started on some new meds and it's just killed my ability to write smut for now :P I'm okay with that since it's been helping me deal with life :P I'm definitely not wearing makeup to the movie because it won't be perfect when I leave the theatre, that's for sure.
