I'm sorry it took me another year to post again but I realized I was missing a day. I went on a search for it and came up with nothing. Well I will just make it up and finish up. I own nothing.

July 28: Warm Candlelight

She hadn't been herself since the accident. Her up was left and down was right. She didn't make sense anymore and they knew she was sick. They choose not to do anything about it. Even those that did try to help were pushed away. She already had a plan that would help and she told them she would get help. In her mind everything was already decided and she knew what she would do. The memories were a burden which meant the house had to go. She thought she could be what he needed but it wasn't enough to keep him in this world and he had left her all alone. Yeah, she knew she had friends and family that loved her too but it wasn't the same as his love. She slowly got everyone off her back as time went on and it had been six months since he had left her. It was coming up to their five year anniversary and it was almost time to set her plan in motion. She had slowly got everything she needed for the night. She knew no one would let her stay at home on this day. It didn't matter because every move had been guessed and calculated. So they ended up having a group dinner in our or to say his honor.

"A toast to our honored guest, Lila, and may you find happiness again in this life."

"Here, here." Everyone else shouted. I stand up.

"Thank you all for coming and if Brainy were here, he would thank you too. I'm glad that you all could help me celebrate this time. I know it's hard for me today but I'm glad that he live this life with all of us. I'm sorry that I have caused you all so much trouble but I thank you all for your help so here is to Brainy!"

To tell you the truth is was the most fun I have had in a long time but I knew that was because I knew what I was about to do. We ended the party about ten because there was work or children to care for. Once I got to our house and knew my escort had left for good I set my plan in motion. I grabbed the gas can from the hall closet and started to drench the place in gas and then headed up the stairs with it. Once there I did the rest of the rooms and was reminded of all our memories. It wasn't fair that I was left alone in this big house. It was OK though because I was going to them soon. Once the upstairs was drenched I went to the bathroom. I had set up candlelights everywhere and place the last of the gasoline in the bath tube. It was a beautiful sight to see all I needed was to light the candles. I took one of the candles, lit it, and used it to light the others around the tub and being very careful. Once they were all lite I took the candle and threw it in the hall. I watch it go up and spread throughout the house. I got in the tub and took another candlelight and looked at it. I felt warm and loved by the flame from this candlelight. I closed my eyes, smiled knowing he was here with me, and let it go.

I wasn't sure why I did this or picked this situation. When I started writing I wasn't even sure who was talking or where I was going. I'm not for suicide but some people wish to not exist for a reason. Even though it's sad just knew that she is kinda happy in a weird way. Sorry to put y'all through this kind of adventure but it was somewhat necessary.