A/N: Howdy folks! So, if you're wondering why I removed this chapter and then put it back up it's because I've changed things. Some of you expressed your concerns about how I ended this chapter in your reviews the first time around and, looking back, you're right; it did sort of come out of nowhere. That having been said, I went back and fixed things so hopefully ya'll like this version better then the last one. If you do, let me know. not only did I do some MAJOR tweaking but I completely changed the last half of the episode so reviews would be nice. If this is your first time reading this chapter, review anyway, I love hearing from you. Until then, read and enjoy.
Cheers!
Chapter X: Resolutions
Todd had been in Atlantis a week during which time he had done his best to adapt to city life and to come to terms with living day to day among so many humans. This was not the first time he had remained for any long duration within the Lantean city but it was the first time in which he found himself required to integrate himself into the lives of his human allies. Sheppard had insisted that if they had to put up with him then Todd would have to do a little more than just be a house guest. He would have to participate in group activities and, as Sheppard put it, get out more. As a result by the seventh day of the wraith's asylum he had learned that every First day various expedition members put on something called their Sunday best and went to worship a variety of religions none of which Todd understood; that every other Fourth day the females of Atlantis gathered in the evening to play poker usually in Katherine's quarters; Second day was called Mystery meat Monday; and every last Seventh day of each month the entire city participated in a celebration that Sheppard told him was called a 'We Haven't Died Yet' party.
In addition to the various activities of the Humans of Atlantis - none of which Todd saw any point to but in which he had begrudgingly been forced to participate – there was one other admin that the wraith had been made aware of in his first few days within the city. Katherine, it would seem, was displeased with him and Todd, after six days, could not determine why.
It had begun after she had returned to the city with her former teammates and Andromeda who, without so much as a by-your-leave, announced to Mr. Woolsey and Dr. Weir that she would be remaining in the city for an undetermined amount of time. Todd was not the only one that caught the dark look that his mate shot the Lantean before disappearing somewhere inside Atlantis. She had not even looked at him and, when pressed, Romulus would only say that Andromeda had been not been particularly kind to Katherine whilst they had been away.
This had made Todd angry but rather than confront the Lantean, who insisted that both she and Romulus needed to speak with Maliaka before she could return to her hive, he instead went in search of his mate. His efforts proved futile; Katherine was nowhere to be found. After hours of searching the wraith reluctantly gave up deciding that, whatever was bothering her, she would come to him in her own time. It took only two days for Todd to realize that his Katherine was deliberately avoiding him and a further four more before he began to grow desperate. He had caught but a few glimpses of her since her return and those few glimpses were not enough to quiet his mind and put his thoughts at ease. When the last day of his first week had come and gone and still he had not discovered what ailment afflicted his chosen the dejected wraith had had enough and decided to go straight to the secondary source. Andromeda had been given quarters very similar to his own located near the science labs. Todd made his way there in all haste and proceeded to bang loudly on her door.
Finding herself abruptly woken, Andromeda answered her door only to come face to face with a severely angered wraith who proceeded to growl at her and shove his way into her chamber before she even had the chance to speak.
"Valloran, what -"
"What did you say to Katherine!?" the wraith demanded, hands clenching and unclenching in obvious agitation.
Andromeda stared at him. "I do not know -"
Todd began to pace. "She is deliberately avoiding me. I have asked Major Lorne if he might speak to her but at each turn, she rebuffs all conversation. She will only say that she is fine and then demand to be left alone."
The woman looked at him with pity. "Then perhaps she is fine and simply does not wish to be disturbed."
The wraith snarled. "I can feel her anxiety, her frustration and malcontent. She is not fine."
The Ancient's face twisted into a sneer. "Then perhaps you were mistaken to bind her so closely when it is clear that she does not understand the significance of such an action."
The pacing stopped and Todd turned, slowly, disbelievingly, to look at Romulus' mate. His friend had not been specific when he had explained that Andromeda was not pleased with Katherine but, hearing the darkness in her words, Todd thought he understood what issue she had with his chosen. "You find fault with my choice," he said slowly, eyes wide, "You do not think her worthy."
"I do not find her worthy of you," the Ancient sighed. "She is a capable, Valloran, extremely so but only by human standards. She does not understand your world or the standards she must rise to in order to become a part of it. I understand you wish to validate your choice but you need not elevate her past the point of her understanding in order to do so. The last female to rise above her level of understanding and take such a role did you no favors as I am sure I have no need to remind -"
Rage boiled in Todd's veins and his growl of fury drowned out whatever else Andromeda had been about to say. "Do not compare Katherine to my motem! The situation is completely dissimilar -"
"The situation is entirely the same Valloran, would that you would see it!" Andromeda cried. "Your mother was the primary's third child, uneducated in how to lead let alone rule. She tricked your sire into binding her and making her queen and once enthroned, her ignorance cost the wraith everything. She had no idea what it meant to be queen, to put others before herself, to serve others as much if not more than they served her. Katherine has no such understanding either and if you make your sire's mistake then you are damning not only yourself but all those who -"
Acting on his wrath, Todd proceeded to slam his fist into the wall beside Andromeda's head. The Lantean female let out a terrified shriek before finding herself trapped between Valloran and the wall. Looking up into the wraith's glowing yellow eyes Andromeda finally realized that she had gone too far.
"V-Valloran -"
"You understand nothing!" Todd hissed, "For all your superior intelligence you are yet as senseless and naive as a human child. You think you understand what it means to be queen; to understand why I long to see Katherine seated upon a throne. She knows what it means to serve blindly, to follow orders as they are given without question despite her own beliefs. As such, she would never demand the same of another. She does not expect loyalty but rewards it when it is given. She protects that which she considers hers with a ferocity that dares any to take from her. Were my motem still alive I would challenge even she to court my Katherine's fury. Her rage, should she feel that those she loves were threatened, would shake the stars!"
A lump formed in Andromeda's throat and she tried to swallow. She had never before seen Valloran this angry or this impassioned in speech. She believed he thought it true although she could still not see it. His faith in his chosen was, however; unshakable and if Andromeda did not wish to come to harm then she knew that any more doubts she had concerning this topic must remain unvoiced.
Still growling softly, Todd pulled away and watched as the Lantean woman fought to regain control of her terror and her composure. It would seem that she, much like Sheppard, had allowed long term familiarity to erase her fear of him. Todd knew that he was dangerous, that there were those that would have him described as violence incarnate and it was time, he felt, to remind those that had forgotten of what he was capable. He too could shake the stars if threatened and Andromeda comparing or even speaking of his Katherine in the same sentence as his depraved motem was, to him, quite threatening. If Andromeda wished to keep her life she would not speak of it again.
"You will keep your opinions on this matter within your own council," he instructed, the promise of harm evident in his tone as he backed away from her. "You will limit what you say to Katherine and if I find that you have in anyway made her doubt herself again, if your words make her draw away from me then…" he hissed, "I will take from you that which you hold most dear and keep it for as long as what I covet remains detached from me."
Andromeda swallowed hard, terrified, before Valloran retreated and left her alone in her quarters. She had seen others fear for their lives when in the presence of the wraith but never had she been one of them. Having been so she was reminded of why so many feared him so greatly.
Valloran was the last person on any earth that one would wish to make an enemy of.
~xXx~
Sunday morning found Kate awake at zero-four-hundred getting dressed for church. Her attendance wasn't stellar given that Atlantis didn't really have off duty hours but when she could she liked to go even if it meant putting on her dress blues. John could never be convinced to get up early enough and was pretty much an Agnostic anyway but they'd been raised catholic and Kate had always found a sense of tranquility in the whole experience. Now if she could just find her damn hat and her service coat she could meet up with Lorne in the mess for some coffee before the service.
The latter was draped over the back of her desk chair while the former had been tossed casually onto her coffee table. Slipping into the jacket, she grabbed the hat up off the table and was all set to walk out the door when she heard a knock. A sudden awareness flooded her mind and Kate knew before she even opened the door who was waiting for her on the other side.
"Todd."
His heart ached to hear such weariness in her tone and to hear her call him 'Todd'. "Has our relationship suffered so great an injury that you will not call me by name?"
She was about to reply with a dismissive and insincere 'sorry' but the look on his face stopped her. Kate knew that Todd liked hearing her say his name but it had never actually occurred to her how much until now. The expression on his face was one of mild betrayal; like it was an insult to have her call him anything other than Valloran.
"I – I'm…" her eyes dropped to the floor and she trailed off uncertainly.
Golden eyes narrowed as Todd watched his Katherine shift nervously before him; void of her usual confidence. If, at this moment, Andromeda was to happen upon them Todd was quite certain he would strangle her. Trampling down his anger, he took a breath, "We much speak."
Immediately her weariness was replaced by panic. Normally Kate wasn't one to shy away from a fight but in the wake of her argument with Andromeda Kate's normal self-confidence abandoned her. The Ancient's words had, in one fell swoop, unleashed all of her insecurities leaving her raw, open, and uncertain. She couldn't do this, not now and, in a last act of self-preservation, Kate found herself looking for a way to escape.
"Look," she began, trying desperately to edge around the wraith, "Can we not do this now? I promised Lorne I'd meet him in the -"
With a hiss, the wraith reached out and caught her arm, staying her before she could attempt to evade him once more. "Major Lorne will understand the delay. This…" he pulled her towards him, "Is more pressing."
Like a scared animal, trapped and without any hope of escape, Kate reluctantly accepted the inevitable. "Alright, talk."
The air was thick with her fear, Todd could taste it. He hissed and drew her closer to him. "You are afraid," he whispered, voice trembling with his own mounting concern and dread, "I can feel your desire to flee, to leave me. I am your mate, Katherine; you know I would never harm you."
"I…" she started, voice faltering, "I don't…I'm not sure I know what that means."
Todd frowned. "I do not understand. What part of that sentence can you not comprehend?"
"All of it!" Kate shouted, her resolve snapping. With a mighty pull she wrenched her arm away, shouting while gesturing between the both of them wildly. "You, me, us! I don't understand any of it! I thought I did but now…I just – Andromeda said -"
"Damn Andromeda!" Todd snarled, advancing. He crowded her, backing her into her doorway, his nearness and proximity boxing her in giving her no room to escape. "She spoke out of turn on a matter which is of no concern to her. You are my mate, my chosen and what your station is as such is none of her -"
"I don't have a station!" Kate argued, pushing at him. "I'm not wraith! I don't want it, I don't… I can't… you never said that if I married you it'd make me a queen! Never, not once! I don't deserve – you… you're out of your mind if you think any of this is okay!"
Her aversion, angry and incoherent as it was, left him unable to speak. He did not understand. Why would she not accept this, why did she not want it? In Todd's mind Katherine was already Queen, his Queen, and had been for far longer than he was willing to admit. Ever since he had given her his name, Todd had had thoughts of her as such which is why he could not understand why she so detested the thought of him acknowledging her in this way. To be Queen was to be honored above all, to be cherished, to be obeyed. Todd had never bowed to anyone, not as Eldest and not as Valloran but to Katherine, for Katherine he would gladly do so. His chosen was deserving and he held her in all confidence, trusting her enough to never lead him or any that followed him astray. If the thought of being called his queen was so disdainful to her then perhaps…perhaps other associations were also unwanted. In his mind, Todd recalled her argument and her mention of their bond and how bonding with him had given her the position she so clearly despised.
A horrible, sickening thought suddenly occurred to him. "I…do not understand," he said, his voice - for the first time in all his life - meek, "Do you not wish to be bound to me?"
There were many words that Kate felt could be used to accurately describe Todd. Pathetic was not normally one of them but right now, at this moment, no other word would suffice. The overwhelming misery infused in his normally strong, multi-toned voice made Kate's blood run cold forming ice crystals in her veins. "No!" she cried, "I mean, yes, I-I do! I love you, I just…I don't know if I can be what you want me to be. You have all these plans; how you're gonna get rid of the queens and save the wraith and you need someone with you that can help with that and I… I don't know if I'll ever be, you know… enough for you."
Shock stole through him as the wraith's eyes widened; alarmed at Katherine's level of insecurity. "How can you think this!?" he demanded, desperate to understand, "How, Katherine, when I have always -"
"Because you're you!" she said, as if that explained everything, "I guess I've spent so much time wanting you that I never stopped to think – I never really understood what it'd mean to have you. My brother calls you the King of wraith and he's not wrong. You're Valloran: the great warrior of Vallan, the High Commander who defeated the Daemon and conquered the Ancients. And that was then. Now, as the Eldest, the other wraith are scared to death of you and as Valloran you're the closet thing they have to a freaking God. Next to all that I'm nothing. In no way can I ever even get close to you, to what you are, who you are. I just…what do you even see in me?"
The question made Todd's breath catch. True, they had never really discussed with one another what attracted them to the other in the first place but then, Todd had not thought it necessary. Hindsight, as the humans said, was twenty-twenty. There had been a pull between them that had existed since the day they had met but it was not that pull alone that had made Todd want her. It was any number of things from the mundane to the stupendous and now, as he looked down into the eyes of his mate with their desperate pleading, Todd designed to enlighten her.
"Katherine," he trilled, "Look at me."
But his mate was determined to stare resolutely at the floor. With a sigh, Todd reached out his feeding hand and cupped her chin; lifting her head until her yes met his. "I see in you everything that I have ever wished for myself but was afraid to seek. Life, my life, has not been kind. I learned early in my years that there were very few females who wished to have me for who I am rather then what I am. First born of Vallan's queen, warrior, commander, high born; I took none to my bed that did not want something from me other than the pleasure of my company. For all my life it has been this way until I met you. You want nothing from me other then what I would freely give and without thought or want for anything in return, you have given me everything that is yours. For that, my Katherine, I am willing – eager – to give you the same. All that I am, all that I can be, my life – is yours. I am yours."
He let out a long, low hiss as she swallowed against his fingers. He went on. "You have conquered me, Katherine Sheppard; without effort you have done what many females before you have tried and failed to do. When I say I wish to call you my Queen, it is not so that you can command me or give me orders that I must obey. The queens of old did not demand that others bow to them. Those that did chose to out of respect, loyalty and deepest trust. To have you as my queen is to honor you, honor the faith I have in you to always act in my best interest before you would act in your own. Andromeda was mistaken to say that you are my queen because you are bound to me. You are my queen, Katherine, because I choose you to be and I would wish it still even if we were not bound. You truly do not know how worthy you are my pereena and I will have you see it before my life is done."
Kate gulped and closed her eyes. Taking a deep breath she tried to calm her racing heart which had begun to beat erratically as the gravity of what he was telling her finally started to sink in. Todd dropped his hand from her face and Kate took another couple of deep breaths before she forced her eyes open and looked up at him.
"I'm not ready," she whispered, hastening to explain when she saw his confusion, "This, all of this, is so new to me. I don't…I need time. Everything was going so well after I got over being a runner, before you and John got stuck together. We were just starting to figure this out, figure us out and then, well, then that whole thing happened and we kinda skipped to the end. I mean, I know why we did, what would've happened if we didn't but now… now we're married, bound, and I… I just feel like we missed it."
The wraith frowned. "You are not happy with our circumstance?" he eyed her, "You did not voice this concern before. When I explained to you what had transpired before going to the conclave, after our consummation, you never said – "
"I didn't say anything because, after everything we were finally, really together and I…" with a sigh of vexation Kate trailed off, "… I know you explained it all to me before; how you wanted to bond with me which is the wraith equivalent of marriage and I wanted that, I do want that but…"
Todd held his breath. "But?"
Kate looked at him. There was a desperate glint in his golden gaze; fear. He was afraid, afraid that she was gonna back out and leave him. Afraid that she didn't want him. She hurried to finish her explanation. She needed to get it out, get it said. It was now or never.
"I love you Valloran, I love you so much it scares me but I'm not ready. Not ready to be your queen and not ready to be your wife. Andromeda, what she said made me stop and think; really think. We skipped it, the whole middle and I want that. I want to have everything with you; the beginning, the middle and the end so can we… can we just rewind? Go back to before, to where we were right before you and John got stuck together? Can we do the middle please? I want… I need that time to adjust, adjust to what you want from me and you, you need that time too because sometimes I think you forget that I'm not from here. I didn't grow up in this galaxy, I'm from another world, somewhere far away and I've got different morals and a different way of doing things. There are a million and one things I want to do, to share with you before I go off and join you and the other wraith because that's what's gonna happen right? When all is said and done, I'm going to leave Atlantis and probably never see Earth again; I'm gonna go off and live with you and your wraith and leave this, all of this behind. I need that, we need that and I…can you just do this for me please? After we've done it all, after we've adjusted and done all the fun, middle stuff, when I'm ready then…then I'd do it. I'll be your wife and I'll be your queen, I promise. I just…I just need time."
Kate stopped talking and waited, watching as the wraith in front of her thought about what she'd said. At first, Todd didn't say anything, in fact he looked confused, but then, slowly, understanding washed over his face and he turned to look at her; amber eyes piercing hers.
"If time is what you require then time I shall grant you," he hissed, reaching down to take her hands into his as he had often seen humans do to comfort one another and show affection. "There is very little I would not do for you, my Katherine. What you ask, I will see it done. We will return to how once we were and I… I shall try to… to court you as I believe that is what you mean when you say that you wish to have the middle. There is but one thing I must ask of you in return."
Just one thing? Okay, Kate could agree to that. "What?"
Todd bowed his head and released Katherine's hands. Stepping closer to her he dropped his feeding hand to her waist whilst his other traced her jaw with his fingertips. "I will return to our previous state because it pleases you but…I do not think I can return our level of intimacy to what it once was. I do not have the strength to abstain from you now that I have had you. I do not think I would survive it were I to try."
Kate flushed; her whole body growing almost uncomfortably warm. "Oh, u-um," she stammered, "Yeah, th-that we can keep."
Growling softly, Todd took a step forwards forcing Katherine backwards into her room. The door slid shut behind him as the wraith let out a long, low hiss. "Good," he whispered, bowing his head and angling it so that his mouth slanted above hers. It has been too long, Todd thought to himself as he closed what remained of the distance between them, crushing his mouth upon hers with bruising force.
'Yes it has,' Kate's mind answered his, her heart dancing in her chest at the snarl that Todd let out in response. It echoed throughout her room as the wraith pushed her back towards her bed and with every step Kate could feel, through their connection, his desire for her growing. It was a constant push in the back of her mind that threatened to swell up and drown her. When at last the backs of her knees hit her mattress Kate grabbed Todd by the arms and spun them both around. Their positions reversed, she pushed at him with both her body and her mind until he sat, a growl of pleasure at her forcefulness escaping him as Kate put her hands on his shoulders and then straddled him.
"Katherine," she heard Todd's voice in her mind, her name an almost desperate plea, "Katherine, it has been ten days. It has been too long since last I touched you. Please Katherine…please…"
With a wicked grin Kate let go of him long enough to shrug out of her service coat before threading her fingers though Todd's hair, pulling the wraith upwards for another kiss. The rest of her dress uniform soon followed and it occurred to her as she was helping to divest Todd of his clothing that she'd gotten dressed this morning for nothing. There was no way in hell she was gonna make it to church and, with Todd the nearly naked wraith under her, Kate couldn't be bothered to feel bad about it.
There was always next Sunday…
~xXx~
The next several days were an adjustment period. Lorne finished getting Todd squared away. Rodney got used to the fact that there was now an Ancient living in the city who, as much as it pained him to admit it, was much smarter than he was. Woolsey and Weir worked tirelessly to work out the kinks in the new chain of command they'd settled on. The colonel stayed mostly out of the way and Kate, two days after her chat with Todd, accosted Cadman, Teyla and Jennifer and dragged them all into her room before locking the door.
"We need to talk," was her opening line and she was too nervous to notice the looks the three women shared before she opened her mouth to launch into her prepared speech. "It's about Todd."
The three of them passed another glance between them. It had been obvious that something was not quite right for over a week now but none of them had been brave enough to ask. If Kate's panicked pacing was any indication it was something big.
"What's up?" Cadman asked.
Kate took a deep breath. "We're married."
"YOU'RE WHAT!?"
Kate, at least, had the compunction to look sheepish as she repeated herself. "Todd and I… we're… married."
Cadman and Jennifer gaped at her while Teyla's surprise was much more reserved. "The hell?!" Cadman cried, "You mean this is why you've been all moody for the past week? I'd have thought you'd be thrilled!"
Jennifer nodded emphatically.
Kate sighed. "And I am, I'm fucking ecstatic that we're finally, you know, together, but I'm not ready to be married."
"Then why'd you do it?" Laura demanded, "If you're not ready, why'd you go through with -"
"Because we both would've died if I hadn't!"
Neither the physician nor the marine knew what to say to this so Teyla, ever the diplomat, tried her hand. "Perhaps," she began slowly, "It would be better if you explained."
Stealing herself, Kate began. "As you know Todd and I share this kind of connection thing, we can sense each other's moods, talk to each other in our heads and sometimes, the closer we are, even feel what the other person is feeling -"
"I didn't know that," Cadman muttered, interrupting.
Kate glared at her. "Well, we can," she snapped, "Moving on. Remember when I was dying and nobody knew why?" they all nodded, "Well, turns out that the connection me and Todd share is basically the wraith version of marriage. And the wraith don't do divorce. Breaking up is a death sentence so in order to not, you know, die we had to reconnect and now we're…"
"Bonded," Teyla finished, an astounded look on her face. "How does Todd feel about this? I cannot imagine he's very pleased."
Kate snorted. "Oh he's tickled fucking pink!" she cried, "That's the problem."
Jennifer frowned. "I'm sorry, problem? Todd's happy about this and it's a problem?"
Her friend shot her a look. "It's a problem because, like I said, I'm not ready."
Cadman was beginning to see the issue. "So, what're you gonna do about it?"
Kate took a deep breath. "Well, yesterday we talked and I asked him to, um, rewind."
The three of them were confused. "Rewind?" Jennifer repeated, "What is he a cassette tape?"
"No!" Kate was exasperated, "Look…" she tried to explain, "… we were kinda forced to jump the gun and skip to the end so I asked him if we could go back and do the rest of it."
The three women looked at one another. "You mean date?" Cadman surmised, still confused, "I don't get it. Did he agree?" Kate nodded, "Then what's the problem?"
"I don't know how!"
"To date?" Jennifer clarified, "You've gone on dates before. You went out with Phoenix remember."
Kate went back to pacing. "Yeah but it ended horribly and this can't end horribly because if it does and we crash and burn of the fourth date we can't just throw up our hands and agree to date other people. The outcome is predetermined and I… I'm…"
Fearing for her friend's health, the pregnant doctor got up and grabbed for Kate, stopping her mid pace. "Okay, Kate," Jennifer spoke in soothing tones, "Calm down. You're over thinking this. You and Todd belong together; I know that, he knows that and everybody else in Atlantis with the exception of your brother knows that. Just, take a deep breath and let's talk about this. You seemed convinced that something's bound to go wrong when we both know that that's not likely."
Reassured, but only somewhat, Kate allowed Jennifer to lead her over to her bed whereupon she sank down onto it. A sudden thought popped into her brain and she looked up at the doctor, the expression on her face one of absolute horror. "What about John?"
Teyla understood her worry but not her fear. "I do not think your brother has any idea what has been going on," she said reservedly, "I believe he chooses to remain in ignorance."
Kate shivered. "Yeah, but he won't, not for much longer."
"What do you mean?" Cadman asked.
Kate's mind began to race. "If Todd actually tries to - he called it court - me, then John's gonna find out. It's hard to date in secret trust me, I've tried. The person you're trying to keep it a secret from is always the first person to find out."
Jennifer thought the solution was fairly simple. "So tell him."
Kate, Cadman and Teyla looked at her like she'd grown another head.
"Wha -?"
Jennifer rolled her eyes. "Kate," green eyes met grey, "Have you ever actually sat the colonel down and explained you and Todd to him before?"
Kate shook her head. "No, but -"
The doctor headed her off. "When it comes to Todd your brother habitually ignores everything about him except what he decides is important. And as a result, he pretty much missed everything up until Todd got sick and we all know how that ended."
Kate was beginning to see where this was going. "So…"
"So after the whole Jurassic Todd episode he decided he'd better start paying attention but since he'd already missed the whole first act he didn't have any context to really understand what was going on," Jennifer continued, "Without context everything that happened between you and Todd sorta gives the wrong impression which is why John insists on acting like such an ass. If you want everything to work out with Todd then the first thing you need to do is explain things to the colonel. Nothing will get better until you do."
Much as she was dreading the conversation she knew that Jennifer was right. John needed to understand, to know, and Kate needed her big brother back. With a sigh she bowed her head and excepted the inevitable.
The conversation changed and turned to other things until the door chimed about an hour later and opened to reveal Lorne. According to the major, Rodney was about to kill Andromeda and Jennifer needed to go save her husband before he began seriously contemplating murder. The group broke up, Teyla took off to go see her son and Cadman and Kate followed Lorne down to their office to have a group discussion about the consequences of having a wraith on their team.
A week later they got their first mission. The planet with all the kids had recently experienced a population boom so their shield needed an upgrade so that it could cover a bigger area. And since Rodney and Andromeda were busy (among other things, trying not to kill each other), it was unanimously decided that Todd was the best person to deal with it. After hearing the explanation about why eight-five percent of the population on M7G-677 was under the age of ten, however; Todd voiced some concerns.
"You wish to take me, on my first mission as a regular member of this expedition, to a planet comprised mostly of children?" the wraith blinked at John Sheppard, "Have your facilities taken compete leave of you?"
John smirked. "Aw come on Todd, it'll be good for you. Children trust easier than adults, it's a great way to ease you in."
The wraith growled. "That may be but I do not interact well with children."
"You can't be worse than Rodney. The first time we were there he got into a fight with an eight year old."
Todd harrumphed. "If you insist on taking this course of action then so be it. When it is over do not say I did not warn you."
"Noted," John said gleefully, rubbing his hands together as his and Lorne's teams, minus Rodney, boarded the jumper. "Let's get this show on the road."
It took them fifteen minutes to get there and another twenty before they were in the village. Todd's reception went about as well as expected. At the first sight of him there were screams, projectiles were thrown at him and Todd was forced to take shelter behind Kate who loudly announced to everyone that could hear her that he was a nice wraith and wasn't going to eat anybody. It took each of them saying it at least twice before the message was finally received and everyone calmed down. Afterwards, Colonel Sheppard explained who Todd was and how he was there to help. This seemed to ease a bit of tension out of the situation but not nearly all of it. Everyone was still wary but through their suspicions John was able to get Keras and the other elders to agree to let Todd work on their shield.
"If you are certain that it can be trusted," Koss, who was two years Keras' junior, voiced.
John opened his mouth to assure him but was cut off.
"He."
All eyes turned to Kate. "I beg your pardon?" Koss cocked his head to one side. "What-"
Kate's voice was sharp. "Todd is male, a he, not an 'it'," she clarified.
Realizing his error, Koss turned towards the wraith and swallowed at the prospect of meeting the creature's eyes directly. "F-forgive me," he stammered, "I…I did not…"
"You are forgiven," Todd inserted, in no mood to garner the fear of the human before him. He wished his task done so that they may return to Atlantis. He had plans for himself and his Katherine this night. "The insult was not meant. May we get on with it?"
John eyed him. "What's with you? Got a hot date tonight?"
The way he said it made it sound as though his words had been chosen specifically to convey some sort of deeper meaning and while Todd did know what the term 'date' meant, given the situation and the continued desire for secrecy, the wraith opted to fringe ignorance. "What?"
John snickered and shook his head. "Never mind," he turned to Keras, "Yes, I'm sure he can be trusted. I may not like him much but he's saved our asses more than once. Not to mention all the shit he's done for Kate."
Kate's head whipped around to her brother so fast it gave her whiplash but she couldn't think of anything to say. What the hell was going on? Was John actually acknowledging... no, he couldn't be. Other than that time with Travers and while she'd been a runner; he didn't know the half of it. Still, that plus his comment about hot dates made Kate wonder if her brother knew that something was going on. Although how much of a something had yet to be disclosed. He couldn't know all of it because if he did then Todd'd be locked in the brig and they'd still be in Atlantis arguing about it.
Todd too found the colonel's sentiment odd but, before he could contemplate on it, Sheppard had turned to him and he found himself being addressed.
"So I need you to teach Keras how to operate the shield and make upgrades that way we don't have to come for a visit every time their population doubles," John eyed him. "That work for you?"
Todd nodded. "It is within my capabilities, yes."
John grinned. "Great," he turned to Lorne "You and everyone else mingle, ask questions, find out if they need anything, excreta. We'll be back in an hour."
Lorne nodded and popped off a salute before his commanding officer turned on his heel and motioned for Todd to follow. It was a fifteen minute walk to the ruins and, once they were out of sight John turned to Keras.
"So," he asked, "What's new with you? It's been a while since I've seen you. Whatever happened to that girl you were keen on, what-was-her-name? Karra?"
The thirty-two year old blushed. "We are expecting our first child in a little under a month."
"HA!" John exclaimed gleefully clapping the young man on the back, "Good for you."
Keras glanced at the man that had saved his life. "Do you have any children Colonel Sheppard?"
"I have Kate."
"Your sister?" the elder frowned, "I do not understand."
John sighed. "I raised her. Our parents separated before Mom found out she was pregnant. By the time she realized she was gonna have a baby there was no chance of reconciliation. Mom almost aborted her -"
"Your motem almost did what to Katherine!?"
John jumped. Todd'd been so quiet since they'd left the village that John had almost forgotten he was there. Hearing the wraith's angry growl cut through his explanation brought the colonel up short and startled Keras who, like his companion, seemed to just realize the wraith was in their company. And boy, John thought, turning towards the alien, Todd did not look happy. In fact, if he had to hazard a guess, John would say the wraith looked rather alarmed.
Nervously John cleared his throat. "Our, ah, Mom didn't really want another kid so she briefly considered abortion. She didn't go through with it because Dad threatened to deny her the divorce if she did. The divorce went through the day after Kate was born so that she wouldn't be illegitimate. Mom and Dad parted ways and, to my knowledge, didn't see each other again until David got married six years later."
Todd growled and kept walking. The humans followed and, when they were on their way once more, the one called Keras turned to Sheppard to inquire after the rest of the tale.
"So how did you end up raising her?"
John shrugged. They'd reached the shield generator and while Todd set up, he continued with the rest of his story. "As much as he loved her, Dad didn't know how to raise a girl. Kate had a nanny from the day we brought her home until she was six and after that she had an army of private tutors and dozens of after school activities; ballet, music, swimming, lacrosse. Anything Dad could think of to keep her busy because he didn't know what else to do with her. David, our oldest brother, went off to college when she was two – he wasn't much help; so it all came down to me. I made sure that she always had someone to talk to who loved her unconditionally, someone who didn't expect anything of her, who just wanted her to be herself. It was hard on her; our parents had two very different sets of expectations and Kate was always kind of torn between the two. She ran herself ragged trying to please them both but all she ended up doing was making herself miserable. No matter what she did, it was never enough for them and, as she got older, both Mom and Dad made it damned clear how disappointed they were in her. In the end she just sorta snapped. Left her fiancée at the altar and just kinda disappeared."
As he listened, Keras couldn't help but feel sorry for the Lady. "And your parents never expressed pride in her?"
John shook his head. "Nope."
Keras could not believe it. "Never?"
"Well…" John trailed off, scowling, "Dad was always proud of Kate he was just shit at telling her that. Mom… I don't think our mother's been proud of Kate a day in her life."
Keras looked at the ground, unable to comprehend what it must've been like to grow up thus. His own parents, though young, had often sought him out to tell him how proud they were of him. He and his brothers and sisters had grown up knowing that they were loved, would always be loved. To not have had that, Keras shook his head, it was unimaginable.
Todd, meanwhile, was laboring under an intangible fury. While his own adolescence could hardly be called congenial he had at least always known that his parents found pride in him, in his accomplishments and in what and who he had become. From Sheppard's description it would seem that Katherine had not been granted that concession and that, more so because he was now reaping the rewards of that deficiency, angered him. It was now easy to understand why his Katherine found it so easy to doubt herself, why she was so quick to believe the words of others when they totted her inadequacies. Her parents had never thought her worthy so his chosen, on some deep level carefully hidden, did not think so either. It was something he thought he could improve upon if only she would let him.
As he began the upgrades, Todd's contemplations turned inwards as he called for the one called Keras to attend him. Carefully he outlined the intimate workings of the shield generator and its functions leaving no detail out. The human was an astute study for which Todd was glad. He vary rarely had to repeat himself and, all told, his explanations were done before the generator had finished calibrating the upgrades. With nothing else to do the two humans once more fell to idle chatter while Todd stood by and listened, neither included in the conversation nor entirely excluded from it. John Sheppard kept sending glances his way which Todd could not interpret and so the wraith gave up. The human would either tell him or he would not, he would waste no time attempting to sieve through the complexities of John Sheppard's thoughts.
When at last the calibrations were complete and the generator began to output more energy, increasing the radius of the shield, the three of them returned to the village where they found Major Lorne and several of the oldest males of the village embroiled in a game of cards. From the number of players and the small piles of rocks meant to simulate plastic chips it was easy to deduce that they were playing poker. Todd looked around, eyes searching for his mate, but did not find her.
"Where is Katherine?"
Lorne looked up. "Huh, what?"
Todd growled. "Where - "
"He wants to know where Kate is," John interrupted before Todd the irritated wraith's voice could raise to a yell and scare everyone, "Come to think of it; I don't see Teyla or Cadman either. Or Ronon. Where'd everybody go?"
"Your women are down at the river, playing with some of the children and pregnant mothers," Koss informed him, "Ronon is giving a lesson on hunting and trapping to some of our younger villagers near the edge of the woods."
John turned to Todd. "There you go, Kate's by the river, are you happy now?" The glare he got could've curdled milk. John did his best to ignore it as he pulled up a seat and gestured for Keras to do the same. "What's the buy in?"
"Four rocks."
"Deal us in."
Todd frowned. "I do not understand. We have completed our task, are we not going to return to the city?"
John eyed him. "Why?" he asked, "Got somewhere to be?"
The wraith hissed. "As circumstance would have it, yes"
"Well too bad."
Todd growled; everyone except Lorne cringed and shrank away from him. The major did, however, eye his commanding officer questioningly as if to ask him why he was purposefully bating the wraith. With a wave, the colonel dismissed his concerns and picked up his cards, arranging them skillfully in his hand.
"Oh relax," he told the agitated alien then, to the table at large, "Call."
Resigned to the fact that he was at Sheppard's mercy, at least for the time being, Todd crossed his arms and let out a long, low hiss. "Very well," he said coolly attempting, perhaps vainly, to keep his temper in check, "If we are not leaving at present then what do you suggest I do to occupy myself?"
The colonel shrugged flippantly. "Don't care; do whatever you want. Just don't eat anybody and try not to start any fights."
Sheppard's response was a dismissal if ever he heard one and, with a quiet snarl, Todd flexed his hands twice before turning on his heel and heading in the direction of the jumper. If he stayed he knew that he would do something he regretted and so, weary of a confrontation with Sheppard more for Katherine's sake then his own, he left.
Back at the table, its occupants watched the wraith stalk away, eight pairs of eyes tracking his movements until he disappeared out of sight. Lorne let out a heavy sigh while the colonel turned resolutely back to the cards in his hand John. Koss, meanwhile, and Keras were eying both Atlantians concernedly. After a few moments of silence, the latter of them finally took the bait.
"Yes, what?" John asked.
Koss eyed him. "Are you certain it is…wise to allow him out of your sight?"
The colonel shrugged. "It's not like he can go anywhere."
Across the table another man, Devan, was also less convinced. "But, are you not worried what he might do if you are not around to control him?"
"Todd's not a pet," Lorne said tersely, frowning.
Sheppard nodded. "Yeah, it's not like we're worried about him pissing on the furniture or anything if we're not in the room."
Koss was still uncertain. "But -"
John interrupted him. "He's not gonna hurt anyone, trust us. Todd's damn scary ninety-nine percent of the time but he doesn't go around killing people for the joy of it. He's not like most wraith, you can trust him."
The testament to Todd's good nature seemed to appease the others; it made Lorne nervous. Unless something had changed in the past twelve hours, Colonel Sheppard didn't trust Todd as far as he could throw him. Something was going on here, something big but, unfortunately, one look at his commanding officer told Lorne that he wouldn't be getting the details anytime soon. So really, the only thing left to do was play cards and hope the colonel slipped and revealed his hand. It was a long shot but Lorne could hope.
He turned his attention back to the game.
~xXx~
Halfway to the jumper Todd realized that he had no desire to traverse further on his present course. There was no point; he could not enter the gate ship if he tried and achieving it would accomplish nothing. Thus, he turned his steps towards the river and made finding his mate his ultimate goal. If he was to be forced to remain in the company of so many unfamiliar humans for any duration of time the least he could do was suffer through it in the presence of his Katherine. His search took him into the woods and led him down to the river's edge were his chosen and Captain Cadman were helping a group of children search through the reeds for, if he had to guess, some manner of small animal. A smile came to his face at the innocent joy his Katherine was experiencing and, hesitant to interrupt, he contented to watch her silently from afar if only for a few moments.
Alerted to the silent presence of the wraith, Teyla looked up from the weaving one of the young mothers had been showing her and greeted him. "Todd."
Yellow eyes slid sideways as, at the Athosian's call, all attentions became focused on him. Two of the three females sitting with Teyla watching while the children played stood, gasping in fear as soon as they saw him. The other remained seated but took to cradling her infant child to her protectively. On the river's banks, the searching children all looked up towards him and let out gasps and small shrieks of surprise tainted by fear. Cadman shot him an apologetic look while Katherine smiled at him.
Todd stepped forwards, his hands held out beseechingly as if to give evidence that he was not a threat. "Do not be frightened," he said carefully, "I will not harm you."
The young females looked unsure while the children seemed only slightly more willing to believe his words. For a moment no one moved but then one of the younglings, a small girl with hair so blonde it was nearly white, stepped forwards away from the others and continued walking until she was standing directly in front of him. The woman with the infant in her lap gasped and seemed to half rise in alarm. Todd took this to mean that she was the child's motem.
"Seera!" the woman called, her voice shrill with alarm.
"It is alright," Teyla assured her, holding up a hand to calm Maeva, "He is not a threat, no harm will come to her."
Maeva was unsure and fearful for her child. All her life she had heard stories of the wraith and how they were to be feared, this wraith certainly looked the part of an evil monster. Dressed all in black and with an aura around him that seemed to contradict all of the Atlantians reassurances that he was not a threat, Maeva could not help the fear that clogged her throat and turned the blood in her veins to ice. Still, neither Teyla, Captain Cadman nor Major Sheppard seemed alarmed. Perhaps…chocking down her fear she remained seated and nodded at her daughter; if Seera wished to venture closer to the creature she would not stop her.
The child, meanwhile, was regarding Todd with intense scrutiny and curiosity. "Are you a wraith?" she asked dubiously as if she doubted that that was indeed what he was.
Todd nodded. "I am."
Little Seera gasped, green eyes going wide. 'The wraith are monsters', her motman had told her, 'If you should see one you must run away very quickly, as fast as you can or else it will eat you!' And for a moment, Seera wanted to run, was going to, but then she stopped. It had said that he wouldn't harm them. Maybe….
"Are you a nice wraith?" she asked it, staring upwards as she dared not to run away.
Todd dipped his head. "I have been described as such."
Upon his confirmation, little Seera smiled shyly. "Will you play with us?"
Cocking his head to one side, surprised by the question, Todd looked past the child towards Katherine who favored him with a gentle smile. "We're catching frogs," she told him, "Or at least this planet's version of them."
"Ah," then, returning his gaze to the child, "Have you managed to catch any?"
Seera shook her head. "Na-ah, but Miss Kate did! She found a burrow and reached down inside of it and pulled one out. It was big and fat, Miss Laura said it's from eating bugs!"
"I am certain that that is it."
Twisting back and forth while wringing her hands together, Seera looked up at the wraith, pleased that he was a nice wraith and that he was talking to her. "So will you play with us?"
Todd shook his head. "No, I think not," then, upon seeing the female child's face fall, he added, "But I shall stay and watch if that should please you."
Appeased, Seera let out a happy squeal and ran back to the water's edge and began babbling to the other children and Miss Kate and Miss Laura, regaling them with what had just happened even though they'd been there to see it. "And then he said…"
With a chuckle, Todd left his place at the tree line and crossed to Teyla. Locking eyes with her he silently asked her permission to join the gathered group and, with a nod, the female acquiesced. Todd sat down and drew up his knees, resting his forearms on them as he turned his attentions towards the water and the children playing there. At the river's edge, his mate turned to him and smiled, her eyes dancing. Relaxing, Todd let himself bask in the feeling of her contentment and joy as though he were a cold blooded creature basking in the sun. Katherine was truly radiant when she was happy.
Beside him, seated closest to Teyla, one of the young women followed his gaze before summoning the courage to speak to him. "She smiles at you," the wraith's head turned towards her fractionally, "And you at her."
Todd, knowing enough to understand what he was being asked, nodded. "I do, yes," he turned towards the female, glancing down for a moment at her protruding belly, "Much as I imagine your mate does to you."
The woman was taken aback by the comparison. "H-he does, yes," she frowned, "I…I do not…is that what she is to you? Your mate?"
In the background, excluded from the current conversation, Teyla and the other women were doing a very poor job of pretending not to be listening. Todd knew that whatever he said would most likely make its way back to Sheppard but, at the moment, he found he did not care. He answered honestly. "She is."
The young female looked beyond surprised whilst her companions, likewise, seemed most astonished. Teyla, Todd noticed, did not seem to share the sentiment. The Athosian hardly seemed to react at all to his confirmation, something the wraith found curious.
"You already knew this," he hissed, eyes narrowed slightly in accusation.
Teyla nodded. "Kate informed me of the…change in your relationship some days ago."
"Did she?"
With a nod, Teyla confirmed it for him noticing as she did that the wraith's over all demeanor was guarded; almost unsure. Almost as if he could not believe that Kate had done such a thing. Teyla decided to elaborate. "Kate came to us, Laura, Jennifer and I, and informed us that by wraith law you and she are married," she paused to gage his reaction, surprise, and then continued. "She seemed…overwhelmed."
With a heavy sigh of regret Todd's gaze shifted back towards the water. He looked tired. "She has asked me to give her time."
"Time for what?" one of the women, the youngest, asked.
Todd hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal and, if he should choose to, what to say. In the end he decided to impart his circumstance, at least in part, to these females hoping that they – as members of Katherine's own species and of her own sex – might give him insight on a subject he poorly lacked. "Our union was abrupt," he explained, "I…made a mistake which nearly cost us both our lives and in order to rectify it we had to…expedite the completion our bond. As such, our positions have progressed past the point at which Katherine feels comfortable. She has asked me for time to...adjust to the results of our union."
The women looked at each other. "Have you granted her the time?" one of them, the pregnant one that had first spoken to him, asked.
The wraith nodded. "I have," he told them, "There is nothing I would not give her were she to ask it of me." As a collective, the women sighed in unison, unreasonably pleased with his avowal. Todd released a sigh of his own, "I do not understand."
Teyla, who had already spoken to Kate, thought she could better explain her friend's hesitation to him. "Todd," she called and the wraith turned to her. His eyes were, for but a second, ungraded and, in that instant, she understood what it was Todd truly feared. Rather than try and explain Kate's reasons to him she tried instead to reassure him. "Do not think that she will leave you. Her heart is yours, trust in that."
Despite the assertions, Todd was still unsure. "She will not let me call her Queen."
Several gasps followed this last confession while Teyla could only look at him with pity. She was, however, unable to say anything to further assuage him for at that moment a joyful cry erupted from the direction of the river and all present, Todd included, turned their heads to see little Seera triumphantly holding her prize – a hapless, frog-like creature – aloft while herself covered in mud.
"I caught one!" she exclaimed, a proud smile plastered onto her young, round face, "Look!" prancing ashore, she eagerly showed off her catch to everyone turning first to her motman and then the other women before, finally, planting herself in front of the wraith. "Look!" she proclaimed again, holding out the greyish-green creature for him to see. "I caught it, all by myself. Just like Miss Kate!"
Despite himself, Todd found himself amused by the child's small accomplishment. "Well done," he bestowed praise on her, gracing her with a gentle smile that he had often gifted Caavin when he had been a youngling.
With a giggle, Seera turned from him and trotted back to the water's edge to show off the poor creature to the other children and Miss Laura. Watching her, Todd looked up when a shadow fell over him. Tilting his head back his eyes found Katherine's and held.
Wordlessly she sat down in front of him, between his knees, and then leaned backwards until she was snuggled against his chest. Surprised by the action but admittedly receptive to it, Todd removed his feeding arm from its resting place and wound it around her waist. Now locked to him, he felt her sigh in contentment.
"So how'd you end up here with us and not with John and Lorne?"
Todd frowned. "Do you dislike my company?" he asked, turning his head so that the question was whispered into her neck, just below her ear.
Kate snorted and tilted her head back, letting it rest on his shoulder. "What have I told you about asking stupid questions?"
With a hiss, the wraith leaned forwards and opened his mouth just enough so that his teeth could scrape gently at the base of her neck. Excitement raced through him as he felt her shiver. "It was no contest," he purred, "I could have remained in the village and subjected myself to Sheppard's company or I could have come and found you."
"Even though my company came at the price of six other women, a baby and a whole bunch of children?"
Todd inclined his head. "If given the choice, no matter whoever else you may be sharing your company with, I will always choose you."
Mindful of those others she'd previously mentioned, Kate resisted the urge she had to turn her head and kiss him properly. As it was, she was amazed he was this into such an obvious display of affection. The wraith Kate had learned, in particular her wraith, weren't usually real big on PDA. Maybe his willingness had something to do with their fight and how, even though they'd talked about it, things still felt a little strained between them.
"That is not why."
Startled, Kate pulled forwards. Immediately she felt Todd's arm tighten around her middle forcing her to settle back against him. She did and, rather than scold him for listening to her thoughts, she instead asked, "Oh? Why then?"
Satisfied that she would not try to escape, Todd answered her. "You asked me to court you did you not?"
"Yeah," Kate said, confused, "But -"
"And are not such types of open affection common during a human courting?"
"Generally speaking, yeah," she twisted, straining against the arm that held her so that she could face him, "But you're not human."
Todd blinked. "You are."
Her breath caught. "Todd -"
"Your continued use of the argument that you are not wraith has given me great cause to reflect upon the differences between you and I," he paused, a long look passing between them before he continued, "Never once, in all the time we have known one another, have you ever asked or expected me to be anything that I am not. You have always and without fail accepted me as I am, as what I am. Even when I still required the need to feed you did not condemn me for it. Therefore it is only fair that I be willing to accept the same from you. You have told me that you wish to be courted and while I cannot promise you that I will behave as humans do whilst I do, I will try to…adapt my methods so that they reflect upon your culture as much as they do upon mine. As a human you have desire for outward displays of emotion and affection; I do not think it beyond my ability to give them to you."
No longer concerned with who was or was not there to see her do it, Kate leaned forwards and kissed him. It was short, lasting barely six seconds, and Kate heard the unmistakable sounds of children giggling and of people gasping as she licked her lips and pulled back so that she could look at him. She smiled. "And you claim you're not romantic."
Todd's golden eyes darkened to amber. "I have long accepted that you seem capable of bringing out attributes in me that would otherwise remain elusive if pursued by another."
Kate opened her mouth.
"Awwwwww, how sweet!"
Together they looked up and found Laura Cadman standing over them, arms crossed and with a look of pure glee plastered onto her face. "You do know that the two of you are just too fucking cute for words right?"
Todd scowled. "I am not cute."
Cadman snickered. "Yes you are," she argued, "You're fucking adorable."
Kate glared up at her. "Is there a reason you're lording over us or are you just being puckish?"
Laura smirked and jerked her thumb behind her. "Everyone else is heading back to the village," she explained, "You coming or staying here?"
Standing, Todd sighed. "I supposed we should accompany you. If we linger, I do not trust Sheppard not to come searching for us."
"That's probably a good idea," Kate agreed, accepting Todd's hand to help her up, "I don't think getting shot was on your list of things to do today."
"Most decidedly not."
"Didn't think so."
Cadman let out a bark of laughter and fell into step beside the two of them as they wandered back towards the village; at least two dozen steps behind everyone else. They traveled in companionable silence and, when they reached the settlement, turned as one and headed in the direction of the Colonel, the Major and Ronon the former of which raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms as the trio approached.
"You're late," he informed them, "Everyone else got back ten minutes ago."
"Oh, so sorry," his sister quipped mockingly, "Did'ya have to start dinner without us?"
John glared at her. "As a matter of fact we did," his turned towards Todd and eyed the wraith amusedly. "Apparently you're a big hit; Braven's daughter won't shut up about you. Keeps saying you're a nice wraith and that you praised her for catching a frog."
Todd hissed defensively, displeased to have his actions were under such scrutiny. "It was an impressive catch."
John's eyes went wide. "So wait, you really did say all that?"
Kate nodded. "Yep, he really did."
Her brother frowned. "I thought you said you were crap with kids?"
The wraith sighed. "Dealing with children is not one of my strengths nor do I find it particularly enjoyable but I am capable of it if the need arises."
The colonel shook his head and muttered something under his breath about being amazed Todd even had kids if he so disliked dealing with them. Sheppard's mumblings were ignored as Todd swept past him allowing his Katherine to steer him towards the dining tables that had been erected at the village's center. John Sheppard and his opinions were washed away as the wraith allowed himself to be lost in the mealtime conversations going on around him. If there was anything he truly need concern himself with he could worry about it later.
~xXx~
An hour later, after the last of the food had been consumed and the tables cleared away, Todd found himself standing at the very edge of the fire's light watching as the humans danced and laughed, carrying on in various pursuits of frivolity. He did not begrudge them their joy, indeed, he found himself exceedingly pleased as he watched his Katherine spin wildly about in the arms of Major Lorne. The major, Todd knew, thought of his mate as though she were a treasured sister, a best friend and so, as they danced, Todd felt no jealously unlike what he had felt with Varkan. The only envy he perceived was that the human was able to so freely shower his chosen with affection whilst he, at least whilst in her brother's presence, could not. Any attention he gave Katherine must be hidden, contained, lest Sheppard see it and seek to take her away from him.
Todd growled at the very thought.
"Something on your mind?"
Startled out of his thoughts, Todd turned and espied the very human around which they revolved standing next to him. He hissed. "Nothing as concerns you."
John sighed and turned back towards the firelight, smiling as his sister and Lorne waltzed past for what and to be the fifth or sixth time. "She's happy," he observed, glancing sideways to see that the wraith's eyes, like his, were glued to the dancing couple. "She always did love to dance."
Todd inclined his head. "It is one of her favorite activates," he agreed.
"But not one of yours," John edged, turning towards him ever so slightly, "I hear you hate it."
"I do not enjoy it, no."
"Then why'd you do it?"
His head cocked in question, Todd turned to face the colonel. "To what are you referring?" he asked
Taking a breath, John faced the wraith head on and reminded him that he'd seen him dance with Kate at their birthday party. "If you hate doing it then why'd you do it with her?"
Todd saw no point in being dishonest. "Because, as I said, it is an activity that Katherine enjoys."
His answer was simple, easy to interpret, and John wasn't stupid. He did, however, want to ask for clarification, so that there could be no room for doubt, but the wraith chose that moment to walk away from him leaving him alone to watch as Kate and Lorne stopped dancing and the former jogged up to him.
He smiled at her. "What's up?"
Kate stuck her hands in her back pockets. "Cadman's been gone a while, I was going to go check on her; see if she needs any help."
John frowned. They'd decided to stay the night so he'd sent Cadman to the jumper to relay a message back to Atlantis informing Woolsey of the change in plans. Seeing his sister's concern he looked down at his watch; the captain had been gone now for close to twenty minutes. "Yeah," he told Kate, "Go check on her, make sure everything's alright. If it's not, radio."
Nodding Kate left the party and headed towards the clearing they'd parked the jumper in. It was completely dark now and Kate was worried that something might have happened to her teammate. She'd never been on this planet at night before so had no idea what kinds of animals came out at night if any. The thought of Laura being attacked by something with claws made Kate walk faster. She was almost to the clearing when she heard it, a scream followed by a yell and then a frightened female voice crying.
"No! Please, stop' let go!"
Kate froze, the hairs on the back of her neck rising as she thought she heard what sounded like a slap followed by a chocked sounding sob. Breaking into a run, she raced forwards until she arrived at the jumper.
A shiver ran down her spine.
Laura was surrounded on all sides by a group of at least six men. Kate didn't recognize them so they weren't from the village or, if they were, they hadn't been at any point during the day or she would've seen them. The men, all of whom were dirty, ragged and heavily armed, had Laura boxed in. One of them, the leader, stood behind her and held her hands behind her back while another – shorter, rounder and missing several teeth – walked casually towards her unfastening the tethers on his pants as he went. It was obvious to all in attendance what was about to happen and one look at Laura's face revealed her to be equal parts furious and terrified.
"Please, please no," she begged, straining with all her might against the man that held her, "Let me go. Just let me go."
"Not gonna happen," the man holding her said, roughly biting her neck to punctuate his sentence. Laura screamed both in pain and in anger. "You're gonna be a good girl and please my men then, maybe, we'll see about letting you go."
Faced with such a fate, Cadman stopped thrashing and simply stood there seething as the man in front of her ran his eyes over her lecherously, shuddering in revulsion as he pressed himself into her. She could feel his breath on her face and with a burst of rage she gathered her strength and brought up her knee. The fat man yelled and dropped to the ground, clutching his groin in pain. Her victory was short lived. Another one of the men came towards her and raised a hand to hit her. Steeling herself, Laura prepared for the hit only to open her eyes when it never landed. Surprised, she looked beyond her newest attacker and Kate.
Cadman let out a sigh of relief.
The man, meanwhile, sneered and turned to face this new little girly. "W'at 're ya -"
Whatever else he'd been about to say was forever lost as, with one swift movement, Kate let go of his arm, reached out and then snapped his neck. His body fell to the ground and, immediately, Kate found herself embroiled in combat as the other five men reacted to the threat of her presence. The leader holding Laura let her go and reached for a gun to try and shoot the woman but she was moving too fast.
Cadman, meanwhile, hit the ground on her hands and knees and then hauled herself up as the largest of her remaining five – no, four – attackers rushed at Kate and attempted to catch her.
"K-Kate!"
Ducking the attempted attack, Kate dodged another one yelling out as she did so. "Laura go! RUN!"
Cadman shook her head and pressed herself up against the side of the jumper, reluctant to leave her friend.
One of the men was able to land a hit on Kate that knocked her backwards but failed to over balance her. "That's an order Captain!" she screamed, catching another man, this one by the arm, and twisting it until, with a snap, it broke and he let out a howl of pain. "Go, now!"
Intense conditioning prevented Laura from arguing with a direct order and, without further prompting, the marine took off at a dead sprint back towards the village. No one tried to stop her and, after just five minutes of running during which time Laura paused for breath not once, she arrived back at the village.
"Colonel!" she screamed as soon as she saw the firelight, "Lorne, Ronon!"
At her shout, all revelry stopped and everyone turned towards her. With the last of her strength, Laura pushed forwards and literally ran right into her commanding officers arms. Shocked, Lorne had no choice but to wrap his arms around her which was a good thing because if he hadn't Cadman would've ended up on the ground. As soon as she collided with his chest, Laura's legs gave out.
"What the -" Lorne started only to cut off as he got his first real look at his captain's face. He gasped and grasped her chin, turning her head towards the light to better see the hand print that adorned her left cheek, "What the hell happened!?"
Gasping for breath between painful sobs that wracked her whole body, Laura tried to explain. "I'd just got back to the jumper when I heard a noise. There…there were a g-group of men w-waiting for me, surrounding the jumper. They, oh god, they grabbed me and tried…th-they were going to -"
"Going to do what Captain?" Sheppard prompted although, sickeningly, he thought he had a pretty good idea as to where this was going. Still, he had to know, "What were they going to do?"
But Cadman was in no mind to answer him; too caught up in reliving her terror. "They…they…they w-where g-g-going too -"
"Force her."
Together everyone looked at Todd. The wraith, upon realizing that Captain Cadman could not finish her sentence, had delved into her mind and taken the needed information from it. He had also, as a result, seen her memories of the attack and felt an echo of her fear. The thought that anyone would dare harm a female, any female, in this way angered him and, with a growl, Todd stood there clenching and unclenching his fists in no small amount of fury. The captain had always been kind to him; it was difficult to see her suffer in this way.
John turned to Lorne who, upon Todd's revelation, had instinctively tightened his arms around Cadman protectively. "Get her someplace safe and try and calm her down," he ordered before turning to Ronon and Todd, "We're going -"
"Kate!" Cadman cried causing everyone to turn to her worriedly. "Kate c-came an-and f-found me. She st-stopped them be-before th-they could…She or-ordered me to run. I…I had n-no choice! Colonel -"
The color drained from John's face. "Where -"
But before he could say anything he was interrupted by a loud, desperate scream that pierced the night and echoed ominously through the trees.
"VALLORAN!"
And before anyone had time to ask what the hell Valloran meant, Todd was off like a shot while Sheppard, Ronon and Keras raced to catch up with him.
"What the hell does 'Valloran' mean?" John shouted as he ran, asking no one in particular. A memory prickled at the back of his mind and he frowned. He'd heard it before, he knew he had, but from where eluded him.
Ronon, keeping pace just in front of Sheppard, didn't answer. A wraith's name was a sacred thing and it was a complete accident that he, Lorne, Cadman and Teyla knew Todd's. They'd all agreed never to mention it and Ronon wasn't about to now just to appease Sheppard's curiosity. If the colonel really wanted to know what it meant he could ask Todd although, there was also every possibility that he'd figure it out on his own.
A growl up ahead had them all running faster, spurring them onwards until they burst into the clearing where they'd left the jumper. There they found Todd hovering angrily some ten feet from Kate who was being pinned by one man while another held one of her own guns directly to her head. Around them were the bodies of four other men who, it was easy to see, were all dead.
John, Ronon and Keras all came huffing to a stop directly beside Todd the pissed off wraith who growled at the men and commanded them to release Kate.
They didn't comply.
"Back off wraith," one of the men, the one whose hand was twisted into Kate's hair, hissed, "Come any closer and we will end you!"
Todd snarled. "You could not end me if you tried. Release her, now!"
The other man, the one with the gun, looked back and forth between Todd and Kate thoughtfully. "Ahh," he said, understanding, "So this girl's important to you is she, wraith? You care for her?"
Todd hissed angrily as the man turned and walked over to Kate. Reaching out, he trailed his hand down the side of Kate's neck and then, as if to prove he could, leaned forwards and licked her right between the breasts. John cringed, his stomach threatening to revolt at the sight. He glanced worriedly at Todd; the wraith's eyes had turned from golden yellow to deep, dark amber.
"I will," he spoke slowly, deliberately, infusing every syllable with malice and threat, "Kill you…if you…touch her!"
The man smirked and nodded to his companion who twisted his hand deeper into the strands of Kate's hair so much so that she cried out in pain. At the sound, Todd stepped forwards only to stop when the barrel of Katherine's gun was suddenly pressed against her temple.
"One more step wraith and she dies!" the man yelled, "I swear, I will kill her."
"Then it will be the last thing you ever do!" Todd hissed, hands clenching so tight his fingernails drew blood.
The wraith's anger only seemed to assume the man who smirked in response to Todd's threat.
John thought the man was an idiot; nobody who made Todd that mad lived. Stepping forwards so that he now stood directly next to the wraith, the colonel leveled the man with a steely, cold gaze. As much as he so didn't care who this man was he knew that if they had any hope of getting out of this situation any information they could get would be helpful. "Who are you and what do you want?"
The man grinned. "Name's Mallik and I'm a bounty hunter," he looked around and met eyes with each of the three men, "And who might you all be?"
Reluctantly John gave up his name nodding at Ronon and Keras to tell them to do the same. Once the introductions were made her turned back to Mallik, "Now, you know who we are, what do you want?"
"Oh not much," the hunter said, "Just your girl here. My employer was very specific, he said he wanted one of the new Atlantians and I think she'll fill the position quite nicely," he turned back to her and traced her jawline with the tip of one finger.
Kate's eyes flashed and, when his finger lingered on her lower lip, she snapped her teeth in an attempt to bite him. She missed and Mallik grabbed her by the chin, forcing her to look up at him. "Ohhh," he cooed, "You're quite the little spitfire aren't you? How about you and me take a ride, sweetheart? I promise it'll be good."
Through clenched teeth, John snarled, "The fuck you're going anywhere with her!"
But the hunter only grinned. "On the contrary Colonel, there's nothing you or your pet wraith can do to stop me."
In unison, both John and Todd growled.
Mallik laughed. "I must say," he said glancing between the one called Sheppard and the monster indiscriminately, "I'd heard the stories about your sister colonel and her wraith but I didn't think they were true," his eyes locked on Todd, "You really do love her don't you?"
The growl that Todd let out could have shattered stone. "Let…her…go."
"I don't think so in fact, I don't know if I'll even turn her in," the gleam in the hunter's eyes was dark and malicious. "Not for a while at least. After all, how many opportunities am I gonna get to pin the one and only Lady Katherine of Atlantis to my bed?"
This last, very evident threat, made John snap. Since Mallik had decided Todd was the bigger threat he wasn't watching John as closely as he should have been. With a growl the colonel rushed forwards, dodging the shot the hunter fired at him. Before Mallik could fire at him again, John tackled him around the middle. With the thud both men hit the ground and began to roll around locked together in combat. Above them, Mallik's man, the one that held Kate, tightened his hold on her and pulled a weapon from the small of his back. Pressing it to her head he put her before him directly in front of the wraith and Sheppard's two men. The message was clear: move and she dies. Reluctantly, the three of them stood down.
John, meanwhile, was still grappling with the hunter who had managed to recover enough to flip them. Now on his back, John raised his arms defensively and waited for Mallik to give him an opening. He did and John took it; as the bounty hunter pulled back for a hard punch, the colonel quickly jabbed his palm upwards and slammed it into Mallik's nose. It broke with a crunch and with a howl of pain, Mallik fell off of him. Rolling to his knees John leaned over his fallen advisory and, with practiced ease, put both hands on either side of his head and snapped his neck. Standing, he turned towards the other man that still held his sister and growled.
"Let her go."
The man shook his head and began backing away, dragging Kate with him. Drawing his nine millimeter from the holster on his thigh, John raised it, took aim and fired a signal shot that buried itself right between the man's eyes. As the body fell, Kate twisted pulling herself out of the corpse's grasp. In three strides John was in front of her, holding her face between his hands. Instinctively her own came up and wrapped their shaking fingers around both his wrists; clinging tight.
"John…"
"Are you alright?"
She nodded. "Yes."
Her brother's hazel eyes softened. "Good," he said, letting go of her face to pull her forwards and crush her against his chest."Let's go home," he whispered into her hair feeling her nod against his lips in agreement. He released her, giving her instructions to go back to the village with Ronon and gather up Cadman, Teyla and Lorne. After all that had happened, they'd not be staying the night.
As Kate moved off to head back with Ronon Todd made to follow her but John stopped him. "Wait just a minute, Todd," the colonel called, "We need to talk."
Moving to the human's side, the wraith eyed him wearily. "Concerning?"
"Kate."
Todd made a face. "Have not you and I already had a discussion revolving entirely around your sister?"
John sighed. "Yes," he agreed, "But that was before."
"Before what?" the wraith prompted, curious as to where the human was going with this.
"Before…ah hell," John looked directly at him, hazel eyes locking to gold, "My sister loves you."
Todd nodded confused as to why Sheppard was restating this. "Yes, we have established this."
"Yes well, what we've not established is that you love her back."
The wraith blinked. "What?"
It was painful for the colonel to repeat himself but he did. "I said, you love her back."
Todd was absolutely baffled. Where was this coming from? "I…yes, I do," he peered at incredulously at Sheppard, "In the past I have tried, numerous times, to prove this to you. Why, now, do you choose to believe me? What has changed?"
"She knows your name."
Todd stared at him.
"Valloran, that's you," John said trying his best to pronounce it right. He must've succeeded because Todd didn't correct him, "You told her your name, your real name."
Denying it would have been pointless so, with no other option, Todd inclined his head in confirmation. "I did, yes," he studied Katherine's brother and then went on to explain, "When I met the human from whom you derived my name I…I did not wish for Katherine to think of him whenever she would think of me."
"So you told her your name."
He nodded. "Yes."
With a sigh, John looked down at the ground. "I ah…I also heard you both on Sunday," he confessed, "I knew Kate'd been having a rough week so I was gonna see her at chapel only she never showed. I went looking for her and found you outside of her quarters. I didn't stick around long but I ah…I heard some of what you said and I ah… I guess I never knew the whole story."
Todd blinked at him. "Is this…are you giving me your -"
"My Blessing, yeah, something like that," he broke off and eyed the alien seriously. "You know I'll kill you if you hurt her right? I mean it, I'll blow off your fucking head."
The wraith nodded. "I am aware," he said, "Believe me, if ever I were to cause Katherine such pain, I would deserve death."
John locked eyes with the wraith. "Just promise me you'll take care of her."
The gravity of the situation finally fell on Todd and the wraith answered as with a promise he felt was worthy of the task Sheppard had charged him with. "I would move the stars for her."
A smirk appeared at the corner of John's mouth. "Yeah, I think you would," he held out his hand, "We good?"
The wraith hesitated for only a moment before reaching out and grasping it. "We are."
"Good."
~xXx~
"And we've no idea who sent them?" Woolsey asked, pacing the length of his office for what had to be the third time, "Or how they found you?"
John shook his head. "Nope, not a clue."
"That's not comforting."
Elizabeth frowned. "Well it certainly complicates things," she looked over at John, "Do you think Laura will be alright? What about Kate?"
"Kate'll bounce back pretty easily I'm sure," John said, "It's unfortunate but she's had a lot more experience in these types of situations then most women. It's Cadman I'm worried about. She's still pretty shaken up."
"Major Lorne said she doesn't want to sleep alone," Woolsey reveled, "I've given him permission to stay the night in her quarters if he thinks it will help."
"It probably will," John agreed, "Cadman's close to her team, they're like her family. Her, Lorne and Kate are thicker then the band of freaking brothers."
"Well then we'll have to let them keep an eye on her," Woolsey said before casting a look over Atlantis' commanding military officer, "How did Todd do?"
John sighed. "He did fine, on the mission part anyway. He seemed to have a bit of trouble with the goodwill part of it though. I think that part of our missions will take some getting used to."
"Yes, I expect so," Woolsey said heaving a sigh as he sat down behind his desk and leaned back in his chair. "Beyond our involvement with him, Todd has seen very little of what we do as an expedition. I expect the next several missions will be a bit of an eye opener for him."
John snorted. "In more ways than one."
Atlantis' director looked him over once last time. "Is there anything else Colonel?"
John shook his head. "Not at the moment."
Once again, Woolsey sighed. "Well then I guess I'd better start the paperwork. I'll be putting Captain Cadman on medical leave starting immediately."
"I was about to suggest it," the colonel said, standing, "Woolsey, Elizabeth," he nodded to each of them in turn, turned on his heel and left the office.
Immediately he sought out Teyla and learned from her that Todd agreed to go a few rounds with
Ronon in the gym and that Kate was in her room. It was getting dark and he wanted to catch her before she went to sleep so, after grabbing a quick bite to eat, he headed down to her quarters and knocked.
Kate didn't look all that thrilled to see him when she opened the door. "John," her voice was a sigh, "I've told you, I'm fine; really. I don't need -"
"I'm not here about that," her brother said, pushing his way into her room, "I'm here because I want you to tell me about Todd."
His sister stared at him. "You want me to what?"
He sighed. "I want you to tell me about Todd, about how everything… happened. I need to understand Katie Beth because right now I've only got the equation and the answer; I need you to walk me through the math."
Kate smiled at the allusion before turning to silently study her brother.
When she'd been a kid, John had been more like a dad then a brother; she'd even lived with him and Nancy for three years while she'd finished high school. Whenever she'd needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to just listen to her she'd always gone to John. David had always been too quick to tell her what she should do and their mother really couldn't have been bothered. Somewhere between college and getting drafted into the NC26 project John had stopped being her confidant and until Daniel and now Evan and Laura, it'd been a long time since she'd ever trusted anyone enough to just listen. She missed it, missed feeling that close to her brother. Other than Todd, John was the person she loved most in the world and one of the biggest problems she had with her and Todd's relationship was the feeling that she was having to choose between them.
It was time to take Jennifer's advice. "Okay," she agreed, gesturing for him to sit. He walked over to her couch, sat down and then leaned forwards to rest his elbows on his knees waiting for her to continue.
Kate took a deep breath. "Let me finish before you jump down my throat alright," she looked at him and saw him nod, telling her to continue. She swallowed and went on.
"I know you don't think that Todd loves me or that, really he's capable of it but you're wrong. You're so, so wrong and I… I don't exactly know how to explain this other than to tell you what he's told me."
"Okay, take your time Katie Beth."
She hesitated. "John -"
But her brother shook his head. "You asked me to listen," he looked at her, hazel eyes boring deeply into hers, "So this is me, listening. I'm not… just, say whatever it is you need to. I promise I won't explode."
Still hesitant, Kate took another deep breath and then took the plunge. "You know, it's funny," she told him, "I know you think this whole thing started when we were on that prison planet but, really, it started way before that."
"How much before?"
"The day we met," then, as an explanation, "When we were in that compound before we ran into the replicators, Todd told me he thought I was desirable."
John's eyebrows rose. "I… really?"
His sister nodded. "Yeah," she smirked, "He said it again too, the next time I saw him; to Lorne. Poor Evan nearly had a heart attack."
John snorted. "I can imagine," he said thinking that if he had heard Todd the wraith say he thought his sister was hot that early on he'd have had a heart attack too. He frowned, the implications of what Kate was telling him suddenly registered. "Hold on, you're saying that this thing you have with him started when you met? That was nearly two years ago!"
Kate huffed. "What you thought we just woke up one day and thought 'hey, I wanna tap that?' No! All this, everything about it, it's way more complicated than that!"
Her brother shook his head. "You're right, I'm… I'm sorry," he sighed, "It's just – never mind. The two of you met, he said he thought you were hot and you started asking him questions about the wraith. Then what happened?"
His answer was a heavy shrug. "From there it just kinda snowballed," Kate admitted not knowing how else to describe it. She tried anyway. "There's always been… there's always been this sort of connection with us, like a string pulling us towards each other. When we were stuck on his hive, he had me brought to his room and gave me all these books to read about how a hive worked; everything from how they're built to how the command structure works. He left me there for hours and when he came back he had a worshipper bring me something to eat so that I didn't have to leave and could stick around, ask him questions about what I'd read. Then there was our spar and then a couple of days after that we played that board game that's kinda like risk and we started talking and I asked him… I asked what made the wraith any different from the Ancients because they wipe out anyone that rivals them and he, he got mad but he didn't make me leave. We talked about the gene therapy afterwards and, well, I can't be sure but – "
"You think you're the reason he decided to try again," John's voice was filled with surprise but really, he should've already known this, all the signs had been there, "You changed his mind."
Kate nodded. "He's never confirmed it but I…the timing just seems so… Anyway, after that, when we went to help the Travelers, Todd was on the hive. He was there to make a deal with the queen and he wasn't going to get involved until he saw Larrin. He knew you like her so as soon as he saw her he started to think how he could save her without it looking suspicious but then, when he found out that the queen had ordered me brought to the hive…Larrin told me that he seemed upset, afraid. It was the first time he showed concern for me."
How and why Todd had gotten himself involved in that particular event had always sort of bothered John. He had, for a time, considered the possibility that their wraith ally might be watching them, keeping tabs on them like some sort of wraithy version of big brother but he'd dismissed it. "I always wondered why he got involved in that," he looked at his sister pointedly. "He did it for you; he's done a lot of stuff for you hasn't he?"
With a bashful nod, Kate replied, "Yes, he has."
"Like protecting you while we were on that prison planet."
Breath catching, Kate realized that they had finally come to the first major turning point in the story. The place where John had first become aware that there was something between them; something more than just basic attraction.
John studied her. "If you wanna skip this part you can," he told her, "I've a pretty good idea of what happened so you don't need to really tell me -"
"No," Kate cut him off, her eyes darkened and flashed to his, holding. "You have no idea what happened between us while we were trapped. You, like everyone else, only saw what we wanted you to see. The illusion, the idea that there was something there and there was. Something happened between us but it's not what you think. I haven't… I've never told anyone what really happened so just be quiet and listen. I need to get it out."
His nod told her to continue and, inhaling deeply, Kate plowed forwards. "When we were on that planet and I was first brought before the Fortress Commander, Seven, you have no idea how close I came to being given away to some random wraith who would've taken pleasure in breaking me in like a damned thoroughbred. Todd stepped in, Todd saved me and it hurt him, actually hurt him to look at me and tell me that I was now his companion. He knew how it'd look and how I'd be seen and it upset him to think that I would be looked at and thought of like a slave. So, even though we had a part to play whenever we were out in public, when it was just us alone in our rooms, Todd did everything in his power to distract me so that I wouldn't think about what I was and what had happened.
"He brought me books to read almost every day. Some were written by wraith and had been salvaged from the original hive that had crashed down before the fortress had been built and some had been taken from various humans who hand ended up there. Depending on what sort of book it was, if it was literature or poetry, sometimes he would read to me. We practiced talking; he taught me how to speak that ancient form of wraith that all his command logs were written in. We'd have entire conversations about everything and nothing in both English and ancient wraith, sometimes we'd even mix them; like Spanglish. Every day he'd tell me how he was working, trying to get us home and at night, sometimes we'd stay until dawn telling each other stories. He'd tell me about the wraith and how they used to be and I'd give him the abridged version of 'Star Wars' and 'Lord of the Rings'. There towards the end I'd actually started him on 'Harry Potter'. When we got back he asked to actually borrow the books; I think he's on book six as we speak."
John watched as his sister talked, a wistful look of remembrance on her face. She was happy, telling him about her time with Todd made her happy and in that moment John realized how much he really had missed. He'd been so blind, so sure that Todd didn't love her, couldn't love her that he'd never stopped to actually connect the dots. Everything the wraith had done with them or for them in the past year had been because of or had had something to do with Kate; everything. How had he not seen it?
The happy expression on Kate's face faded and then vanished. She fell silent, lost in thought. "Katie?" John prompted.
She looked at him, a pained look plastered on her face. "And then we got rescued," she said sadly.
"And it ended."
She nodded. "Yeah," guilty eyes glanced upwards. "I lied to you, when I said that I started it," there was no need for her to clarify what she was talking about, "He kissed me and, if I had wanted him to stop John he would have. I wanted it, I wanted him and we almost…but then Rodney knocked on the door and we had to stop. Later, when we were all getting ready to leave, he pulled me aside and told me not to tell you what had happened. It hurt, it hurt so badly and I was so angry at myself for forgetting that it was all pretend, that it wasn't real. I thought…I thought that he didn't want you to know because if you did then he'd lose his advantage with us."
Yes, John could see why she'd think that. "I take it that wasn't the reason he asked you not to tell."
She shook her head. "He asked me not to tell because he thought that if you knew you'd do everything in your power to keep me away from him and he… he decided that he'd rather be just my friend and keep seeing me then sleep with me and loose me forever. After we got rescued and after he explained to me his reasons…if he had given me any reason to think he still wanted me, I would've jumped on that train faster than you could've blinked but he, he kept me at arm's length. You would've been proud of how much restraint he showed; he told me, later, that trying to keep away from me was like trying to hold his breath underwater indefinitely."
"Doomed for failure."
"Yeah."
John sighed. When he'd asked her to tell him about Todd he'd known the explanation was gonna blow his mind but he hadn't quite expected it to be this blown. And it was, how he saw things, how he saw Todd, would never be the same after this. Never. There was no going back and honestly, John was glad. He thought about where the story was going to go next.
"So, then there was our birthday party -"
Kate cut him off. "No, first there was Travers."
Cold anger washed through John at the mention of Todd Travers. "Right, him," he nearly growled. "You died, Todd saved you," he glanced at his sister, "And then he told you his name."
Kate stared at him. "I…h-how do you know -"
"You screamed for him Katie, when Mallik had you; you screamed his name and I knew, knew I'd heard it somewhere before," he looked at her, "It took me a while but then I remembered; you said it right before you slipped into your coma."
Kate looked at the floor. "I…I shouldn't have done that," she gulped, "It's just, I panicked and I -"
Not wanting her to feel guilty, he interrupted her. "I don't think Todd cares," he said, "Honestly, I don't."
"I still shouldn't have said it much less screamed it," his sister insisted, "A wraith's name is sacred to them, it's not mine to just give away. If Todd wanted you to know it he'd have told you."
John tired to put her at ease. "Well when I asked him about it he didn't deny it; he even told me why he told you."
Kate blinked, surprised. "I…he did?"
Her brother nodded. "He said he didn't want you to think of him when you thought about Travers because that's where I got his name from," he looked at his sister, "He could've denied it but he didn't. I think that means he doesn't care that I know."
His logic seemed plausible and, after this particular revelation, neither of them spoke for several minutes. John was silently contemplating the ramifications of what all his sister had told him so far and Kate was trying to figure out where to go from here. In the end she got up and walked to her bedside table. She could feel John's eyes tracking her as she went and she ignored them as she opened the drawer and pulled out the dagger she kept there. Walking back over to the couch, she stopped in front of her brother and held it out to him.
"What's this?" he asked, taking it from her, "Some kind of knife?"
Kate sat down next to him and took a deep breath. "It's called a Lotlorian blade. Each one is unique, made usually by a father or a brother; sometimes a mate but not generally. It's awarded to females who've proven themselves capable leaders in battle."
John looked down at the thing and pulled it from its sheath, examining it. It was very finely made and heavy with a red stone embedded in the pummel and engravings etched long the fuller. He looked back up at Katie. "So this thing's special right?" she nodded. "How'd you get one?"
"Todd made it for me."
John raised an eyebrow. "He made this for you?"
"From scratch; it was my birthday present."
Her brother blinked, stunned not for the first time since their discussion had started. "What does it say?" then, as clarification, "The words on the blade. What do they say?"
"No retreat in the face of battle. No sympathy for the fallen. No mercy for your enemies," Kate recited and then added, "It's in Ancient wraith."
Again, silence surrounded both brother and sister and for about ten minutes nobody talked. Then, John broke the silence. "Tell me why you were upset."
Kate turned to him. "What?"
John caught her hands in his and squeezed them tight. "I know there's more, probably a lot more but right now I feel like my head's gonna explode with everything you've told me so let's just skip ahead to the part where you tell me what had you all worked up after you and Andromeda came back from your ship hunt. I figure you can sit me down and tell me the rest later. Maybe we can even make a thing of it; confessions with Kate."
Kate snickered. "Yeah okay," she said realizing that John probably was feeling a bit overwhelmed given everything. It was a lot to take in when it hadn't happened to you. "I suppose before I tell you what went wrong I've got to explain how the wraith do marriage."
At the sound of the 'm' word John sat up ram rod straight. Last Sunday, he'd heard the two of them mention marriage but he hadn't really had enough facts at the time to figure out if they were talking in future or present tense. It had all been really confusing especially since his brain had been playing catch-up the whole time. Now, however, he felt he as though he was about to receive a friggin' big piece of the overall puzzle.
He prompted her to continue, "Marriage?"
Kate nodded. "Yeah," then, after she'd taken another deep breath, "Ironically enough, the first time Todd told me about how wraith do marriage was at Jennifer and Rodney's wedding. He told me that when wraith marry – they call it bonding – it's forever. There's a connection between mates that literally ties their lives together and the wraith don't do divorce; to separate is to die. This connection, we have it; Todd and I and he, when he found out that the queen's made me a runner to punish him and not you, not Atlantis, he broke the connection."
John's eyes went wide as he realized why this little tidbit was so important. "That's what…when you got sick and we couldn't… he broke up with you and you nearly died!"
"It wasn't just me," Kate informed her brother gravely, it still scared her to think about how close they'd both gotten to death's door, "When Todd broke our connection it nearly killed us both and in order to fix it, Ganos had to help him redo it so now we're connected again and as a result we're…Todd and I are…"
And as Katie trailed off, John understood what she was trying to say. "Married," he finished for her.
Kate swallowed wondering that if by telling him this she was about to get Todd shot at. Again. "By wraith law yes."
Even knowing without a doubt that Todd did love his sister, learning that by wraith law they were hitched was a bit much for him. Turning towards Kate he inquired in as even and neutral a voice as he could muster, "And… how do you feel about that?" and then, with the same amount of effort at not blowing his top, "Is that what was bothering you all last week?"
Kate's answering nod almost had John reaching for his gun; not to actually shoot the wraith but more to shoot at him. He'd purposely miss but Todd didn't need to know that. It took a supreme amount of effort to hold off and wait for Katie to continue.
She did. "While we were looking for the Leviathan Andromeda… she said some things that she probably shouldn't have and I don't really want to repeat them but… the gist of it all is that as much as I love him and as much as I know he loves me we skipped to the end without doing the middle and I…"
"Despite knowing that you're married you don't feel married so in order to catch up to where you are you wanna go back and do the whole courting, dating thing," John supplied, he always had been good at understanding what his sister was trying to say.
Kate nodded. "Yeah."
John sighed. "Well, I won't pretend to be thrilled about all this…" and at the indignant look she shot him John hastily continued, "But, now that I've got a bit more of the picture I'll admit that I… may have been wrong about Todd. I still don't think he deserves you but then, I don't think anyone does but… if you're happy then, I guess I can learn to live with it."
He had barely finished speaking before Kate lunged at him and John found his arms full of crying, sobbing, sister. Instinctively, he wrapped her up and held her tight just like he'd done when she'd been a little girl. It'd been so long since he'd held her like this; since she'd let herself break down in front of him. Astounded by her trust in him, he held her tighter and felt her burry her head into his shoulder.
"Shhhh. I've got you. It's okay, it's all gonna be okay," he pulled back when he heard her sniffle and kissed her forehead, brushing a tear from her cheek. "I love you, you know that right?"
Kate sniffled. "I know," she said, tears running unchecked down her cheeks, "And that's what's made this all so hard."
John frowned. "Made what hard?"
"Me and Todd," Kate replied, her voice gargled, "I love you so, so much and I love him and it's… it's like ever since I got back from being a runner…you've made it so clear that you don't approve; I feel like I've been having to choose between you. And I hate it, I hate it so much. You're my brother and he's my, my everything else and I don't want to have loose one of you so that I can have the other especially when I don't have a choice about which one I'd have to pick. I…"
His sister trailed off and began to sob more earnestly leaving John with the revelation as to just how much pain he'd been putting his sister through over the last few months. When Kate'd been born, John had been the first to hold her afterwards because both his mother and father had been too busy arguing over who was gonna get custody of her now that they were divorced. He had heard her crying from her crib so he'd hopped up, wondered over to her and peered down her with all the curiousness of the average thirteen year old boy. Huge, watery grey eyes had looked back at him and in that instant John had sworn to protect his baby sister no matter what. She was his, his and if Mother and Dad didn't want her then he'd take her. Scooping her up he'd marched over to both his parents and interrupted their argument by declaring loudly that baby Kate was coming home with him and that she was his reasonability from now on. His parents had been too stunned to argue and John had spent the rest of the day holding her and rocking her and telling her over and over again that her big brother loved her whenever she cried.
Now, looking back at those same steel grey eyes that had once captured him so completely John realized that he'd failed to protect her from the one person he never thought he'd ever have to; himself. And it killed him, seeing her like this literally tore at his heart. "I'm so sorry," he whispered, pleading, as he cupped her face and brushed back her tears with the pads of his thumbs, "I… after you left Travers you just disappeared and I thought I'd lost you. I came to Atlantis knowing that it was a one way trip because I thought you didn't want me around anymore. Then, when you got here, it was like I got my baby sister back. Everything was the way it used to be. But then you met Todd and I… I could see you falling for him and it was like Travers all over again. I didn't want to lose you again so I held on. I should've let you go; if it comes back it's yours right? But I couldn't, I…I didn't want – I love you so much Katherine Elizabeth, more than my own life and the thought of sharing you, with anybody… I'm so, so sorry!"
Sniffling, her eyes still blurry with tears, Kate smiled at her big brother. "I love you too, John."
The siblings stared at each other for a few moments more before they heard a knock sound against Kate's door. She got up and went to answer it.
"Who is it?" John called.
"Three guesses," Kate answered, swiping her hand over the doors controls. The panel hissed open to revel a concerned looking Todd standing just outside her door. "Hey," she greeted, leaning against the doorjamb, "John's here."
"Is he?" Todd frowned, "Then may I trust that he is the cause for your recent upset?"
She nodded. "Yeah, but before you eat him just know; it was cathartic."
"That is good to know," he began backing away, if Sheppard was secreted within then it was a fair guess to say that Todd would not be spending his night in Katherine's company. "Will I see you in the morning?"
Kate seemed to catch on too. "Yeah," she said, a little sadly, "I'll meet you for -"
"There's no need!" John called, getting up and walking over towards the door. He nodded to the wraith in acknowledgement before turning to his sister, "It's time for me to tap out anyway; I've got mission reports to work on and a captain to go check on."
He made to move past her but Kate stopped him. "You don't have to go," she said, "I'm not kicking you out."
Holding up his hands he backed out of the room anyway. "No but I'm leaving anyway. Ya'll have fun, use protection and try not to be too loud."
Kate blushed. "Oh Lord."
Todd looked confused. "What does he mean use protec -"
"Birth control, he means mean birth control," Kate said quickly before Todd could finish saying the word protection, she really didn't want to explain to him what a condom was. "And I'm on birth control genius," she admonished her brother, "It's a requirement for going through the gate. I get a shot every three months."
John smirked. "So, there's no chance I'm gonna be an uncle any time soo-"
"OH MY GOD GET OUT!" Kate screamed, shoving at her brother until he tumbled the rest of the way out of her room into the hall. "Idiot!"
"You love me," John snickered, laughing, "And really, it's not so -"
"Go away John!"
"Fine," he pouted, "I get the picture, I'll see you both in the morning. It's staff meeting day, yay!" and then, with a final wave, he left them alone.
Todd turned to his mate. "Katherine?" he questioned.
Kate sighed. "John came by and wanted me to explain us to him so I did," she waved for him to come in and then shut the door, "He knows."
"Knows what, exactly?" Todd questioned, reclining himself on her bed, "I gather, from your banter, that he is aware of the…progress in our relationship?"
Sitting beside him, Kate nodded while absentmindedly tracing patterns on his thigh. "I didn't explicitly tell him we're sleeping together but I'm sure he's smart enough to infer it."
"And yet I have not been shot."
Kate's eyes danced. "Not yet anyways."
Todd hissed and sat up, resting his weight on his feeding hand while using the other to reach out and catch Katherine's chin. "And your discussion, you are pleased with its outcome?"
"I am," she confirmed, leaning into his touch.
The wraith growled softly. "I can feel your contentment," he told her, "You are happy."
A wicked smile tugged at the corners of Kate's mouth. "I'd be happier if you kissed me."
Growling softly, Todd dipped his head towards her and complied; hissing in satisfaction as he captured her mouth with his. His mate responded to him eagerly, rising up to meet him halfway. After the trials of the day, they both needed this. It took Todd little time at all to divest Katherine of her coverings and to lay her back amongst the pillows on her bed. In minutes his own clothing was gone and he and his mate were writhing together as one, each lost in the ecstasy they found only in the other. When it was over, Todd collapsed onto his stomach after Katherine took herself out from under him. Molding herself into his side, the wraith hissed in pleasure as his chosen began to play with the ridges of his spine.
His last conscious thought before succumbing to slumber was that, at long last, everything would be alright.
A/N: Hey there, don't forget to review. Again, if this is your second run through I'd really like to know if you liked the changes or which version you liked best. If it's not, review anyway; it's the only way Fanfiction authors get paid. So drop a penny in my cup and make my day. 'Til next time...
Cheers!
Lady M
