Alright fam, warning this is literally the most cliche thing I've ever written so feel free to just skim through all the sappy stuff. Sorry in advance for the lack of reality in this.


July 3rd, 2016

11:30 pm

It's official, Xander and I have been dating for a month. I know this sounds cliche cause it's so early on, but i'm really starting to fall for him. He's sweet, funny, romantic and a million other things i can't put into words. Not to mention how amazing he is with his mouth. I don't want to say I love him but if all goes well eventually i think i might.


Emma signed her journal with a big elaborate heart at the end like always. Ever since she knew how to write she had practiced her signature, just in case she became famous. Closing her journal and putting it back under her pillow, Emma climbed into bed, her own for once, and tried to go to sleep. Tried being the key word. All she could think about was her diary entry. Did she really love him or did she love what he did for her? "Ugh love is so confusing" she thought to herself mentally slapping her forehead. "What if I can't do this? What if I can't commit to something like this? Or he cheats on me? Or he somehow dies?" By this point she was sweating profusely and her heart was racing. Anxiety has always been a problem for her. She shot out of bed and raced over to Grizzly cabin. Even though Xander was the cause of her anxiety he seemed to be the only one that could help her right now.

"Xander! Xander I need you open the door!" She pounded on the door her heart still racing. It was only after he opened the door and his mouth fell open she realized she was completely topless. Emma bolted inside leaving her horny boyfriend still standing in the doorway. She grabbed one of his shirts and threw it over her head. Once Xander finally turned around he was still staring.

"You do realize that shirt is white right" he said.

"Not now," she said slumping onto his bed.

"Emma what's wrong?" he said sitting down next to her.

"Do you think this is gonna work?" she said sitting back up and looking at him. "Like us? I mean after camp is over. I live in the city and you live...wherever. I don't want to sound pessimistic but am I wrong? What if we can't do this. We're only 17 and Ravi said that almost 75% of high school relationships fail. And not to mention the fact that I haven't met your parents. What if they don't like me? What if they-"

"Emma" Xander cut her off "Emma relax. Can we talk about this? What are you so worried about?"

"I just listed like 10 reasons. Were you even listening? That's a super important element in a-" she started hyperventilating again.

"No! No babe I heard everything you said. I meant what are you really worried about? Everything you said started with a what if. Meaning it's not an 100% going to happen. Instead of focusing on what could happen we have to focus on what is happening. And what's happening is a great relationship. I know this may be coming on too strong but I'm really starting to fall for you Emma. I've never felt this happy with anyone I've ever dated. Granted there was only one but the point is that you matter so much to me and seeing you like this kills me. All I've ever wanted to do is make you feel good. So if it takes taking the train into the city every afternoon that's what i'm gonna do because i actually live in long island which is really not that far from you. Anyway what I'm trying to say is that whatever happens after camp will happen. All we can do is try. And I will never stop trying. Because I love you. I really love you Emma Ross."

For a few seconds they just stared expecting the other one to speak.

"Are you gonna say something or...leave me hanging…" he asked kind of hoping for the first option.

"I...I would but I really don't know what to say." Emma responded looking down at her feet. They remained silent for almost a whole two minutes before emma looked over at him tears started to form and kissed him tenderly. "But I think I love you too." She kissed him again. "No i don't think, I do. I do love you Xander." And with that she launched herself on top of him kissing him softly and giggling through the tears of joy streaming down her face. They smiled at each other laughing slightly because neither of them could tell if that initial encounter had been a fight or not.

"I should also say something else though." Emma started sitting up and straddling his waist.

"What's that?" Xander whispered bringing his hands to her hips and gently stroking the soft skin under his huge white t-shirt that fit her so well.

"I love you."

"Didn't we just discuss this?"

"Let me finish. And with that love comes something else. I've always said that I wanted my first time to be with someone I loved so…" Emma drifted off at the end hoping he would get what she was trying to say.

"Sooo…?" Apparently not.

"I'm ready to have sex."


I'm gonna try and write the next chapter as soon as I can. I'm realizing that a lot of you may have given up on this story since I waited like 6 months to update. But hopefully the whole smut thing will draw some more people in. If you did however read the last chapter and didn't get a chance to review please review this one because I'm actually pretty proud of given how cliche it is. So please please please review and give me suggestions because after this sex scene I kinda wanna go into some more relationshippy stuff but also some more sexy stuff in the future. Thanks so much!