Title: Without Harm
Author: kiraloverless
Account: u/6023476/k…
Fandom: Ed, Edd, 'n Eddy
Musical Recommendation: watch?v=8Z5EjAmZS1o Yiruma's Greatest Piano Hits
Setting: Hotel/ Apartments
Pairing: Kevin/Edd (lil bit of Nat x Rave)
Genre: Hurt/comfort, some smexy in later chapters.
Rating: M
Chapters: 15
Type of Work: Multi Chapter story
Status: Incomplete
Warnings: Gay sex, angst,
Disclaimer: I don't own Edd n Eddy belongs to cartoon network and Danny Antonucci, Rave belongs to kirakurryart, Nat belongs to c2ndyac1d
Chapter 14
"Looks like rain doesn't it?" It was Bards voice, it was getting a little dark out. But Eddward's eyes could recognize that man anywhere. Wearing a dark blue turtle neck sweater with a dark wash jeans. His grey hair and wrinkles at the sides of his eyes that he'd spent years memorizing. Those brown eyes that he believed at one time would always look lovingly at only him, almost as they were now.
"Bard." Eddward stated a thin line to his lips.
"Let's go inside, It's been a long time, I came by to talk to you. I'm glad I actually caught you this time."
"You've been following me everywhere, you've already been inside my house, if you're going to kill me just do it quick. I'm tiered of running from you."
Every cell in his body was screaming at him to run away, find a door and lock it and pray he'd live to see another day. Hyper aware of the distance between them, just how easily a gun could be raised between them, ending his life. Aware of the erratic heart beating in his rib cage ready for a fight or flight decision analyzing his movements continuously.
Bard laughs with a shake of his head. "Don't you think I would've done that a long time ago? I didn't come here to hurt you Eddward, darling"
'Don't call me that.'
Chilly rain drops began to fall, the day getting darker as the clouds came tighter together in a grey over cast.
"You were cutting me open while those monsters held me down last I saw you. Why are you still after me? Haven't you already broken everything of my being already? What more do you want from me?"
Bard made his way over to him in a blink of an eye laying a hand over his mouth to silence him.
"If you listen to what I have to say, you wont see me after this I promise you. Unless you want to include your neighbor's on this conversation I suggest we talk privately." He was whispering, barely applying a fraction of the force to his arm when Eddward knew his full strength. A few seconds passed before Eddward nodded feeling that Bard really did only want to talk.
"It's not like I could stop you from going into my house any way. Fine, but only talking. I have no intention of letting you take advantage of me again." They turned to make their way into Eddward's home.
"I hope you enjoyed my gift?" Bard asked once they had stepped into the elevator. Eddward sighed.
"Don't patronize me, Bard. Please state your business with me and be on your way as you promised."
They stepped into the apartment and it's everything that Eddward was not expecting. He found himself in a familiar tight embrace that caught him off guard making him tense in fear of what Bard would do next.
"God have I missed you my dear sweet angel"
The moment was short lived though as Eddward managed to quickly get out of the hold and step away.
"Do no presume to touch me! Don't ever touch me again!" He yelled more out of fear than as a threat.
Bard sighs his shoulder's slump to the sides.
"I know that you are very, impossibly and very rightfully angry with me, Eddward, but I do still love you and I had a small hope that I might be able to tell you that. Even if it were the very last time I ever saw you." He stepped closer raising his hands defensively showing that they were empty.
"I had to do what I did in order to save your life. I know that you probably won't believe me but it's true. If those men knew that you were the scientist who ran the project they would have killed you first. I had to get back the .. excuse me for putting it this way but 'all the products and evidence' they were looking for, after trying to convince them that the scientist they were looking for was already dead."
Listening to Bard describing what he knew had actually happened brought fresh tears to his eyes.
"You knew who they were didn't you? You were working with them? Why couldn't you have taken us out of there sooner? Or at the very least why couldn't you have done it differently? They did horrible things to me, are you aware of that?"
"I was .. involved yes, I was placed there to monitor the program, to report back when and if the babies were going to be born. I found out that the government was going to use our program to birth an unlisted army of future solders that were going to be trained spies and assassins or human genii pigs to other projects and they would start with the first 'prototypes' to see if it worked. A few of my very trusted friends and I decided to destroy everything and fake the reports as a failed project so that that would never happen. The only problem was that they did not know about you, carrying our child." At this point Bard had come close enough to despite what he was told, embraced Eddward's tearing trembling figure tightly to his chest.
"I never reported anything about you, us or about my biological involvement in the project so I had to separate you from the baby in order to keep them from killing you. I never ever meant to hurt you like that, I promise you."
Eddward was a shaking ball of anger and hatred at the moment. " You betrayed me. You disgusting foul excuse of a human being."
"I know. And you're entitled to hate me for the rest of your life. But please consider my requests regardless." Bard kneeled to lay his head to Eddward's lower stomach and whispered "Please Understand that what I did, I did out of love, I will never stop loving you, but please even if it's just a small part of me, I'm asking you to forgive a small part of me."
Bard apologizes and Eddward cries standing straight forcing himself to look forward and ignore the pleas of an ex feancé, ex colleague, stalker, murderer and despicable human being. "I will never ever forgive you, ever!"
"That's fine. I can live with that. I won't lie and say that I'll be able to live without you, but I know you won't have me in your life any more." The elder man's hands tightly held Eddward in place for a few more minutes.
They stayed that way while the rain tapped agents the glass windows, every drop bringing the horrible memories to play out if Eddward's mind again. Every tear they shed remembering the bitter sweet memories of their relationship, their sacred haven, their promise to confide in and trust the other, their every pain and joy.
Eddward's heart shattering all over again, as he stood still, firm to his words. Time passed and Bard stood, laying a gentle kiss upon his lips, one last time.
The rumbling in the clouds despite their distance nearly enough to have him collapse to the ground as Bard pulled away.
'I still love him! damn it all'
His thumbs gentle brushing away Eddward's tears.
"I … Also would like to extract the gps transmitter from your back. So that you can rest assured that I'll never be able to find you again. I'll just make a small cut, it will heal in a few days time."
"If you feel you must. It isn't as though you've asked to cut into me before, damn it." Turning his head sharply to the side.
'Of course, how else would you have found me?'
Bard stepped behind him very slowly, lifting the shirt off of his slander scared body, gently caressing the skin with his fingers. Taking in one last breath of his beloved for the last time. Daring to reach forward and hold Eddward close placing his hand over the savage scare below his navel.
A memory of how Bard had held Eddward and their child in a gentle embrace just as this countless times before played endlessly as his eyes played an evil trick on him. Their hands caressed the growing bump in a loving embrace with matching rings on their ring fingers.
' "I can't wait to start our own family soon!" "I hope the baby doesn't hate me"
"Baby's are too pure and innocent to hate anyone Bard, don't be silly. You'll be a wonderful father" "I hope he has your eyes" '
All too soon he was pulled from the memory as a cool sensation came upon his skin. Bard was applying a disinfectant alcohol swab to a small spot between the left shoulder blade and spine, particularly between two large whip scars, just below a few layers of skin, he made a cut no longer than a centimeter long and pulled out a small chip with a little blinking dot in it's center the size of a nano chip if not a little smaller.
A small band aid was placed, a gentle kiss to the back of Eddward's hand and a soft whisper.
"Goodbye my darling, live well."
And just as silently as he had appeared, he was gone. Only the cold chill from outside and the click telling him that Bard had finally gone.
Eddward looked back at the door, somewhere in his heart and shaken soul he wanted to go after Bard. The memories were heavy in his heart and it wasn't fair, a great love in his life had left him and it was never going to go back to the way things were. He would never had to fear for his life and run away anymore. He'd never have to live in the dark cloud of selfloathing again.
And yet, the pain was so much to bear through that it was suffocating him.
"I will never forgive you, but I still have a place for you in my heart, the beautiful past, and future we were working so hard towards. I can't love you anymore, and I'll never forgive you completely, but … so I just wanted to make piece with that. I don't hate you, but I am going to move on from you."
Words so bold and loud he suddenly found himself yelling at Bard between his front door and elevator as the rain had come pouring down. He came out handing him an umbrella and offered a stern look.
Bard had turned to offer a sad smile and nodded.
"Understood, take care, Eddward my dear."
The elevator came, he stepped in, and waved goodbye.
Eddward stood there watching the rain clean away the bitterness from his heart and soul. Taking in a deep breath, relived to finally be free of his past. A heavy burden lifted from his heart as the fresh smell of tomorrow cooled his flustered body.
'Goodbye my love, Take care.'
He sat on the cold concrete floor looking out over the barrier over the tops on the trees, the street and Bard's umbrella leaving him forever. A guest of wind passing him again making him clutch at his arms wishing to see the face of a love he truly couldn't bare the thought of watching leave from his life as Bard was now. He imagined Kevin's warm body and kind face.
"Loneliness is such a cruel thing isn't it?" He mumbled to himself. Wishing so badly that Kevin would come through the elevator doors and hold him tightly.
After waiting an absurd twenty minutes in the cold, he stood up, dusted the back of his pants and when inside.
Switching on a few lights and making himself a hot cup of hot chocolate he sat at the piano with a blanket near the window, watching outside loving the sound of rain and his newfound freedom to do what ever he pleased with his life.
