"There are a lot of things that you are going through Potter. I was obvious from the start that I would not be able to help you."

"Help? I never needed help! The only reason you know… everything is because of occlumency!" Harry yelled. How dare he say otherwise?

"The fact remains that I know parts of your past you wish had remained hidden. You need someone more… you need Dumbledore." Snape insisted.

"I don't need anyone! No one said I needed to talk when Cedric died! When Voldemort revived himself with my blood! When my only affectionate relative had his soul sucked out of him or when I killed that Basilisk and got its fang into my arm! No one said-"

"You got bitten by the basilisk?" Harry did not appreciate the interruption and brought his fists hard on the other's wooden desk. He quickly regretted it. The oak desk was very firm and one hand was still healing. He took advantage of the pain, twisting it into anger.

"Why does having sex willingly suddenly change people's perception that I'm made of stone!" He yelled. At this Snape stood up, his palms resting calmly on the table. He was taller than him. That was likely to never change.

"You are a child. There is no such thing as having sex willingly at your age. You are getting out of control Potter! If your parents were still around-"

"Well they're not are they! Nothing is ever going to change that! I will always be Harry James Potter, the boy-who-lived to be left on the doorstep of people who would tell me every day to pretend I don't exist! Who would slam me into a dark, spider infested cupboard whenever strange things happened around me. I have nothing to talk to anyone about! Mr. Emwood was the best thing that happened to me in-" The sound of a slap echoed in the study and its sting cut Harry off instantly.

Harry felt his hand go up to cradle his hot cheek protectively and blinked the blurriness from his vision. Snape simply stared at him blankly, hand coming back down to his side.

"Did you just…" He whispered. Snape came round the table and sat in front of him shaking him slightly but firmly with each phrase he said.

"Do not ever say something like that again. Nothing that happened… none of those things are things you should view as a positive." Harry still rubbed his cheek and hiccupped, glaring at the man, straining not to cry. In truth the slap wasn't that hard, but it dealt an emotional blow with its brief sting. "You are so… frustrating, Potter! I… this is the only way to help you."

"I don't-" His voice broke and breathing was becoming hard. He cleared his throat. "I don't need or want anyone's help. I want Voldemort to die. I want every death eater to pay. I want Sirius to be cleared and I want…" He sat deflated, looking up at the potion's master and looked away, feeling suddenly exhausted, like the air had been knocked out of him. "…forget it… what does it matter."

He heard Snape sigh but he didn't look up. "What do you want me to do, Potter."

"…pretend you saw nothing…hate me again." He said.

"…I can't do that, Potter. I tried getting the authorities to imprison that man. It has proven difficult. It would be easier with Professor Dumbledore's help. More importantly, Dumbledore will know how he can help you." Snape said.

"Fine…" Harry finally said. "If you can get him to even look my way." Snape reached his hand to him and Harry flinched. The hand stopped and Snape stood, making it look as if he wasn't reaching for him in the first place.

"We will go now." Snape said. Probably before Harry had time to change his mind, or gain the will power to run away from the potions master.

As they walked the corridors he tried to focus on one single thing as Snape had suggested. One single thing. The image of a flickering candle came to mind and he focused on it. Before he knew it, with his mind blank, little else seemed to matter. He didn't even pay attention to the password Snape gave to the gargoyle nor did he care about the way the headmaster talked to Snape only.

Their lips were moving but Harry didn't pick up on it. Snape glanced at him every so often. Dumbledore's eyes widened slightly in shock and turned to look at him. Harry felt as if he wasn't in his body anymore… as if he was stepping back and his body was being left empty.

Suddenly he was being shaken once more by the shoulders, the world focusing once more, his senses waking up slowly. "-tter! Potter!" Harry jumped at the sound and gasped.

"What…"

"Potter! What in Merlin's name happened to you?" Snape asked, the urgency in his voice made Harry's throat tighten. Was that concern or was he deluding himself again.

"I was… focusing on one thing." Harry mumbled.

"…Very concerning… I'm afraid Severus… that occlumency may perhaps be too much for Harry at the present time."

"Why?" Harry asked looking up at Dumbledore in worry, Dumbledore's eyes flickered to Snape.

"Potter… I've been calling you for the last five minutes." Snape said.

"Oh…" Harry couldn't really find himself to care. He was sure he would look back at this tomorrow terrified but at the moment he felt perfectly empty. "Did you tell him?" Harry asked. Snape frowned, clearly not wanting to drop the subject. None the less he stood up and went to sit on the other chair.

"He has Harry. I must admit I… I find myself without words. I never could have imagined that I was putting you in such circumstances when I left you within the protection of those wards." Dumbledore looked at Snape. "I would like some words with Harry alone if you will Severus."

Snape stood and headed for the door without looking back. Harry watched him go. A familiar sense of abandonment settled in him and he looked back at Dumbledore who was focusing on his interlocked fingers with a frown on his features. For once Harry thought that it wasn't because of any other reason beside the discomfort that this kind of topic seemed to stir in others.

"Harry, I take it professor Snape found out due to your occlumency lessons?" He asked.

He nodded. "Yes. He saw some... things. And then asked me some questions. I figured I might as well tell him since he was probably going to see the memories anyway. I asked him to keep it a secret."

"This man, you also went to see him last summer. Was it before or after the dementor attack?"

"…before." Harry felt himself cringing at the fact that Dumbledore now knew such a thing about him. Perfect little Harry Potter, a worse disappointment than anyone ever anticipated.

"I did not want you to hear all the nasty things the prophet was proclaiming and so tried to keep you guarded from the magical world. I suppose I thought a little isolation was healthier than the damage such words could inflict. I was wrong."

"Please professor. You don't need to apologise. I've caused you a lot of trouble as it is… Voldemort is back because of me."

"Voldemort is back yes… but he would have found another way if he had not gotten to you. You are not to blame. And as you know… Voldemort is a great risk to your life still… my greatest concern is your safety." He said.

Harry nodded, guilt swirling inside him. "I know."

"So you understand why the blood wards are of the utmost importance?" Again Harry nodded.

"I didn't expect anything to change in that regard headmaster. I understand the importance of the bloodwards." At least until Sirius was officially cleared.

"Have you been to see Madam Pomfrey about this?"

"Yes. Professor Snape made me see her at once." At this point neither one of them were looking at each other.

"And your relationship with professor Snape has improved since then? He was the one to take care of you when you were poisoned, am I correct?"

"…he did what he had to do. And now he's informed you about my secret, professor. So now we can focus strictly on occluding."

"I'm afraid not Harry. You cannot continue occlumency. Therefore, I believe the only time you now need to spend with professor Snape will be in potions class."

Harry nodded. He expected to be relieved. Yet he quickly discovered that he wasn't. "Alright. And Voldemort? What if he tries to get into my head again?" Harry asked.

"We don't know if he's aware of the connection just yet… but whatever you do, don't occlude… your technique is far too strong in your current state of mind. You could never return from it." Harry had no idea how to process that information. First he was rubbish at occlumency. Now he was too good. Would the headaches ever cease?

"Alright… thank you Professor. May I go now?" He asked. Dumbledore paused and the silence stretched. It seemed like he wanted to say something else but never got to it.

"Yes Harry. You may go. If you wish to talk to me just let me know." Yeah. Like that was going to happen. He stood up and headed for the door. He partly expected Snape to be standing outside. The corridor was empty. 'Accept it you stupid idiot. He never cared in the first place.'

Harry closed the door and took a deep breath. He found himself shaking his head and laughing softly. "You're so stupid." He whispered to himself and made his way back to the common room.