Welcome, once again, sports fans to a new episode of Laff-A-Lympics. The competition begins in Hartford, Connecticut, where teams will try to claim victory. From there, we wrap up in Antarctica where our cool competitors can earn more points towards today's highly-coveted Laff-A-Lympics Gold Medal.
As we join the Yogi Yahooeys, the Scooby Doobies, and the Really Rottens, let's once again join Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf, our color commentators.
"Thanks, and welcome to Bushnell Park for our first event," Snagglepuss told everyone. "It's the 200 yard [182.88 m] insurance dash. If you're unlucky enough to be stopped by an insurance adjuster denying your path through the course, you get a five-second time penalty. So do your best as you try to claim first place."
"Once again I'm here to introduce our contestants," Mildew said. "It looks like the team captain himself is going to run for the Yogis."
"If I can get me some picnic baskets and run away from Ranger Smith, I can run away from anything," Yogi replied.
"I suppose you have a point. Let's move on. Representing the Scoobies, we have Shaggy. I'm surprised you're running this race."
"Insurance adjusters don't scare me, Mildew," Shaggy answered, "as long as they aren't monsters."
"You have nothing to fear. We tried to get some, but they didn't pass the physical examination. And now, let's see who the Rottens have running today. It's none other than the diminutive Dastardly Dalton. Dastardly, what's your thoughts about this race?"
"I'm a Dalton, so nothing scares me—not even these insurance varmints. So, I think I have a pretty good chance if I say so myself," Dastardly told Mildew.
"You may be right, believe it or not."
As a clock tower's bell chimed, the runners took off from the starting line.
Look at our runners go, Shaggy and Dastardly have the early lead as Yogi brings up the rear. But as we reach the quarter point, an adjuster pops up and stops Dastardly.
The gathered crowd counted down the five second penalty before Dastardly could continue. Meanwhile, Yogi continued to close the gap between Shaggy and himself.
Shaggy and Yogi are neck and neck, and Yogi gets stopped at the halfway mark. Now Shaggy has the lead outright with Dastardly Dalton in second place and closing.
As the adjuster allowed Yogi to resume running, the latter sprinted as fast as he could to try to contend for first place. If only he could just make things close at the three-quarter mark, the race would be tightly-contested again.
And as we hit the last quarter point, everyone is going to be stopped. Wow, this was an unexpected turn of events. But now, the final 50 yards [45.72 m] will be mostly even. And there they go!
Yogi, Shaggy, and Dastardly ran back and forth. Dastardly somehow managed to sneak into second place and run as close as he could to Yogi without contact. Shaggy, hearing the people so close behind him, gulped and tried to run faster.
As we reach the finish line, it's... Shaggy for the Scoobies, with Yogi just ahead of Dastardly Dalton.
Although the Rottens finished last, the rest of the team cheered Dastardly's effort.
"Sorry I let you down, but I didn't have any chance to cheat, either," he said.
"Don't worry, little brother, we'll get 'em next time," Dinky replied.
"Shaggy, what gave you that second burst of energy?" Mildew asked, interviewing the winner.
"With everyone right on my tail, it made me think I was being chased by a m...monster and my instincts just kicked in," Shaggy explained.
"Well, your instincts paid off with a win. Good job."
The Scoobies take an early lead with 25 points. The Yogis take second with 15 while the Rottens start in the cellar with 10.
"We're here outside Metya Insurance Headquarters for a most unusual event," Mildew announced. "For the first time in Laff-A-Lympics history, we're going to have a coin-counting contest. That doesn't sound particularly fun. In fact, it sounds more boring that watching paint dry."
"It was either that or a three-way chess match," Snagglepuss replied. "And since we lacked a chess set, coin counting got approved."
"In that case, it all makes sense—or is that cents? And this contest is simple. Teams don't have to guess the dollar amount, but they will have five minutes to confer with each other and guess how many coins are in the container you see here."
"And the team closest to the amount wins the contest and keeps the money as a prize. In the event two teams are off by the same difference, those teams will tie."
Everyone looked at the jar once more—a nondescript glass container with a screw-on lid contained pennies, nickles, dimes, and quarters.
The time begins now and each team has five minutes to confer and secretly submit their answer to Snagglepuss and Mildew.
"I say there's 317," Pixie said.
"That's too much. I'd guess 259," Mr. Jinx replied.
"What do you think, Yogi?" Boo Boo asked.
"As captain, I'll let you guys hash it out and then I'll send our answer in," he answered.
Alongside them, the Scoobies had a similar debate.
"I say there's 100 coins," Dynomutt told everyone.
"There's far more than that. That mayonnaise jar has that much in pennies at the very least," Shaggy replied.
"Mayonnaise? Yum yum!" Scooby said as he licked his chops.
"It's a shame we don't have time to count them all, huh?" Babu asked.
A distance away, the Rottens assessed the situation.
"Wouldn't you know, an event where we can't cheat even if we wanted to. What do you all think?"
"I bet there's 300 coins in there exactly," Dinky Dalton said.
"How would you know? You can't see anything wearing that oversize hat."
"I have a feeling."
"I saw there's 476!" daisy Mayhem called out.
Orful Octopus pointed and gurgled.
"No," Mr. Creepley replied. "That's not even close to being correct!"
As time expired and a bell rung, Snagglepuss appeared on camera again.
"OK, everyone, our teams have talked and tallied and turned in their guesses. Let's see how everyone did, shall we?" he said.
Everyone looked on anxiously for the results.
"The Yogis have submitted a guess of 309. The Scoobies guessed 280. And, the Rottens have turned in a guess of 402."
Mildew walked up to the jar and removed a card from on top of the lid.
"It says here there are 390 coins in the jar. I hate to tell you this, but the Rottens came closest. They missed by only 12 coins. The Yogis were off by 81, and the Scoobies were off by 110."
Everyone cheered loudly, including the Rottens.
"So tell me, Dread Baron, how did you come up with your winning number?" Snagglepuss asked.
Dread answered, "I asked everyone but Orful for a guess and averaged them out to a total."
"Simple but effective. Let's check..."
"Hold on!" a voice called out. "I need you to sign this audit form."
Snagglepuss looked at the man and asked, "What are you doing here?"
"I was asked to secretly observe the contest. Nothing underhanded took place, so I can submit a positive report—with your signature, of course."
"Indeed."
As Snagglepuss signed the form, the man added at the bottom, "Everything turned out OK with no issues. Sincerely yours, Jonathan Penny."
"OK, now lets get the halftime totals," Mildew said.
The Rottens pick up 25 points—and the cash in the jar—to move up to 35. The Yogis get 15 points to bump them up to 30. And the Scoobies get 10 for their terrible tally, giving them 35.
"I'm going to hate leaving here," Mildew said.
"It may be cold at our next destination, but I'm sure the competition will heat up with everyone so close," Snagglepuss told him.
As we leave Hartford for a trip to the southernmost continent of the world, you're invited to keep watching the second half of our all-star Laff-A-Lympics.
Welcome back to the second half of our final regular episode of the Laff-A-Lympics. With playoff seeding on the line, you can bet we'll see intense Antarctic competition in ice floe surfing and capture the penguin.
When we left Hartford, the Rottens and the Scoobies each had 35 points. The Yogis were close behind with 30 points. Let's rejoin Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf and find out who will be the big winner.
"Thanks and welcome back, even, for our interesting event. Each team will have one contestant surf on an ice floe," Snagglepuss told everyone.
"That's right," Mildew added. "Teams will be judged on originality, skill, and lack of cheating."
"And I'm here with our superb surfers. For the Yogis, we have Huck Hound."
"Thanks, Snag. I haven't had a chance to do much, so I'm eager to do well here today, even if it's so cold here."
"At least everyone has those warm thermal bodysuits to keep them warm, huh? Here, we have Captain Caveman for the Scoobies."
Captain Caveman grunted before adding, "Me surf long time, no problem."
"And for the Rottens, we have Mrs. Creepley."
"Thanks, darling," she replied. "Orful really wanted to compete, but this cold weather isn't good for an octopus. Besides, I love feeling the wind through my hair."
"If you say so. Everyone, go ahead and get on your ice floes as we get you on your way."
As our contestants take off, they paddle out and wait for the next big wave.
As the wave approached, Mrs. Creepley struck a stylish pose.
"This ought to wow those darlings," she said as her ice floe started to move back towards the starting point.
Huck Hound remained unsure about what to do next.
"I'd really like to hot dog, but that might melt my chances of winning," he stated.
Undaunted, he tried to shift his ice flow to perform a trick maneuver.
Elsewhere, Captain Caveman watched the others and tried to think about what he should try. He put his club into his fur and pulled out a prehistoric creature. The creature, not expecting to be dragged out to surf on an ice floe, started to mimic Captain Caveman's moves.
Watch our competitors as they try to show style and warmth before they return to the starting point. We may have to get a ruling, though, on Captain Caveman using a prop.
"While everyone was busy watching, I checked the rule book—and its supplement, even—and there's nothing in there that prohibits prehistoric props on a surfboard," Snagglepuss interjected.
In that case, forget I even mentioned it. As everyone returns and dismounts from their ice floes, we now turn to our guest judge, Jabberjaw. He'll share his observations and reveal the winner momentarily.
"Woo woo woo woo! It's nice to get some respect for a change," Jabberjaw replied. "Now, as for the surfing, the Yogis effort was a real yawner. Huck seemed too hesitant. Unfortunately, I didn't like his performance."
A dejected Huckleberry said, "Sorry, guys," to his teammates as they groaned in disappointment.
"The Scoobies, on the other hand, did a good job. Captain Caveman using that weird creature was a nice touch. I've never seen synchronized surfing before, so it impressed me."
"Did you hear that, Cavey? They liked you," the Teen Angels said.
"Aww shucks, me gonna blush," Captain Caveman replied.
"As for the Rottens, they shocked me with a lack of cheating. They always give us no respect. But once I saw they weren't cheating, I saw Mrs. Creepley staying calm, focused, and looking like she had fun. I can't see how I can give her anything other than first place."
The Rottens cheered after their initial surprise.
"See, darling, I know how to impress a judge. Besides, it was fun finishing ahead of all those goody goods," Mrs. Creepley stated.
Mildew looked on in shock.
"If Jabberjaw says the Rottens win, I guess it's not my place to second-guess him. But I definitely didn't expect that," he said.
"And before you have a meltdown, Mildew, let's get the scores and see who leads, even," Snagglepuss said.
The Rottens, with their surprising victory, receive 25 more points to take the lead with 60. The Scoobies get 15 points for second—where they stay with 50 in all. After receiving 10 points for third, the Yogis find themselves falling deeper into the cellar with 40 points.
"We're here in McMurdo for our final event," Snagglepuss told the audience. "Trios of teammates will try to capture first place with our capture the penguin event."
Fans applauded softly on account of their winterized apparel muffling the sound.
"That's not all," Mildew said. "With so much on the line today, we're once again doubling our points for placing and cheating. Also, the winning team receives hot chocolate for everyone."
"Yes, indeed. Indeed, we are. Let's meet our brave contestants that braved the cold for this event. For the Yogis, it's Yogi himself along with Boo Boo and Cindy."
"We're smarter than the average bear, and we'll catch that penguin—no matter where," Yogi replied.
"I guess you have a point, Yogi. For the Scoobies, it's going to be the Teen Angels: Brenda, Taffy, and Dee Dee."
"We're good as finding clues, why can't we find a penguin?" Taffy asked.
Off with his other teammates, Captain Caveman grunted and added, "Me train them well."
Snagglepuss nodded and said, "We'll see how true that turns out to be. Finally, we have the Dalton Brothers—Dastardly, Dinky, and Dirty."
"The family that hunts together stays together, right?" Dastardly asked.
"You got it, little brother," Dinky replied.
Mildew pointed at an overhead timer, saying, "In a moment, our clock will count down. If you capture the penguin before time runs out, you win. Second and third place will be determined by the judges. And remember: no tricks."
"Brack!" the Magic Rabbit replied.
At the sound of sleigh bells, the three trios scattered in their quest to find and capture the penguin.
"So, are we going to use the fake penguin trick this time?" Dirty Dalton asked.
"You know we can't do that. We tried that before and got disqualified; they'll be expecting it," Dinky replied.
"What do penguins eat, anyways?" Dastardly asked.
"Maybe they eat ice cream."
"I got it, we can try ice cubes," Dirty suggested.
"Penguins eat ice cubes?"
"What else is there to eat around here?"
"I thought they ate fish."
"They can't eat that all the time, right?"
Elsewhere, the Teen Angels discussed their own ideas.
"You can lure penguins with doughnuts?" Taffy asked.
"Why not, they would want to eat something different," Brenda replied.
"I still say this is a dumb idea. What if we don't get the right penguin?"
"Hmm, you have a point. Maybe we'll have to hunt for it instead of waiting for it—but I'm still using the doughnuts as bait."
Dee Dee shook her head.
Closer to the icy water, Yogi and his teammates closed in on a group of penguins.
"Alright, folks, let's jump right in and catch us a penguin," Yogi said.
"How will we know which one is the right penguin, Yogi?" Boo Boo asked.
"That's a very good question. Too bad I don't have a good answer."
"I guess we'll have to check them one by one."
Yogi and Boo Boo reluctantly approached the penguins and did their best to try to figure out which one they needed to capture. Unfortunately, they didn't know if they would find it.
Elsewhere, Dinky Dalton called out, "Here penguin penguin."
"I told you they don't eat ice cubes, you frozen-brained bumblehead," Dirty said.
"Oh yeah? What's that over there?"
"Hey it's a penguin, let's get it!"
At once, all three Dalton Brothers took off after the penguin.
Meanwhile, the Teen Angels continued their unsuccessful attempts at luring penguins with a donut.
"This isn't turning out to be a good idea," Taffy said.
"Hey, what's that up there?" Dee Dee asked.
"It's a whole mess of penguins."
"Oh, no, we only have one doughnut, they'll fight over it."
"That's not the worst thing—we have no guarantee the penguin we want is in there."
Later, time expired as all three trios returned to the starting area.
"Alright, let's check them out one by one here. First, we have the Daltons," Snagglepuss said.
Dinky Dalton simply shrugged his shoulders.
"Too bad, they have no penguin. Let's hope nobody else finds it so we can use the tie-breaker."
"I wish we had an ice breaker, it's freezing here," Dastardly Dalton said.
"Now, let's check out the Teen Angels. They have a penguin here, but is it the right one?"
"How do you know which one it is?" Brenda asked.
"Simple, Miss Brenda," Mildew replied. "We have an RFID chip that will activate this scanner if you captured the penguin."
Mildew used his scanner, but it didn't register anything.
"Sorry, but this isn't the right penguin. But at least you'll get points for the effort."
"OK, Yogi, how did you guys do?" Snagglepuss asked as he stuck the microphone in front of Yogi.
"Cindy here has a penguin, so let Mildew use his scanner again to see if we win."
Mildew scanned Cindy's penguin. This time, the scanner activated.
"Yogi's right, they did in fact capture the penguin. You got right one, Cindy, but I'd like to know how you found it in that large group we put it in," Mildew said.
"That's easy, Mildew. I just used my charm," Cindy said as she smiled and batted her eyes.
"Why didn't I think of that?" Dee Dee asked.
The Rottens grumbled at being outwitted again.
"With that over, let's get the final scores so we can abandon Antarctica in favor of a hotter habitat, shall we?" Snagglepuss told the audience.
Of course. In addition to their hot chocolate bonus, the Yogis get 50 important points to finish with 90. The Scoobies get 30 points for coming the next closest to success. They finish with 80. Finally, the Rottens get 20 points for their unsuccessful effort, giving them 80 as well. This means the Yogis—in a single event—moved from worst to first!
The Yogis cheered loudly at the announcement.
"And before we continue, we have some important news," Snagglepuss stated. "The win gives us a tie for first place. The Yogis and the Scoobies have identical medal totals. So, we had to total up the points from these 12 competitions to see who had more. The Yogis finished with 1020 points, slightly more than the Scoobies who had 945. So, the Yogis will have the top seed in the playoffs."
After cheering again, the Yogis and Scoobies exchanged handshakes and other gestures of good sportsmanship.
A moment later, Quick Draw McGraw stood on the podium with the Yogis' gold medal. Representing the Scoobies and Rottens respectively were Blue Falcon and Daisy Mayhem—each wearing a silver medal.
"Well, Snag, all we have is one more competition and it's a wrap," Mildew said.
"And you can bet with everything on the line, all three teams will be battling for our ultimate championship. And we also have surprises waiting for everyone, so we hope you join us next time," Snagglepuss replied.
"Just hearing that makes me want to quiver. I know you'll want to join us and see what happens."
As our competition ends today, the stage is set for the playoffs. Who will win? Can the Really Rottens really win it all? And what surprises await us? Find out on our next—and final episode—of the Laff-A-Lympics.
Mock Social Media Updates
Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed – The Yogis get a big win to force a tie; take the 1st place seed, even, after our latest #Laff-A-Lympics competiton.
Yogi Yahooeys MyBook Account – Our victory in the last event gives us first place for the day and for the playoffs. Can we finish better than the average team? Watch us next time and find out.
Final Team Standings
Yogi Yahooeys, 6, 4, 2, 1020
Scooby Doobies, 6, 4, 2, 945
Really Rottens, 2, 6, 4, 690
