So this chapter is pretty short tbh but I've been moving recently so I had limited time to write this. Sorry guys!
But it get pretty cute at the end so that makes up for it? *she hopes*
Enjoy!
We. All. Got. Jobs. To. Do.
~MaggieRhee
"I tell you all the time
Heaven is a place on earth with you
Tell me all the things you wanna do
I heard that you like the bad girls
Honey, is that true?
It's better than I ever even knew
They say that the world was built for two
Only worth living if somebody is loving you
Baby, now you do."
-Video Games.
-Lana Del Rey
Maggie ran out of the office and off to our bunk.
I chased after her, silently. In the daylight, I would've called her name. Now though, when everything had to be such a secret, I knew it would just upset her.
I was already upset.
We were outside of bunk when she finally stopped. Her breathing was erratic with no steady pace and she was crying.
"Maggie," I said.
"Just go away, Glenn." she sobbed.
Her face was crumpled with pain. However, she was quiet. In a world like this, you learned the tricks to stay silent when you needed to.
"No, I-" I shook my head. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Tell you what?" she scoffed. "About the abortion?"
"Yeah." I said.
"Well why would I have ever told you that?" she asked. "There was never a reason to until now."
She looked at me in a way that made me feel guilty.
"I've told you everything. Everything about my life before this, and my family and-" tears fell down my face. "Just everything Maggie. How could you keep this from me?"
She shook her head. "It was my business."
"No," I said. "When you agreed to be my wife, all of your business became my business too."
"Not this." she said. Her face was serious. "And don't act like you don't keep things from me."
"I don't, Maggie. Really." I lied. I still hadn't told her about the council meeting tonight. Still, that was much different.
She rolled her eyes. "If you say so." she sat down against the tires of a train car.
I sat next to her. "Why didn't you ever mention it?"
"I didn't have to." she snapped.
"But still, you could've." I said.
She shrugged. "Mistakes happen, obviously." she scoffed. "And you're hardly the first guy I've had sex with Glenn."
Her words hurt even though they shouldn't have. I knew Maggie had been pretty wild once she went off to college but to hear her say it made it more real.
"That doesn't mean you couldn't have told me about it." I said.
"I didn't have to!" she defended herself.
"Well, then do it now." I said. "Tell me about it. Because having to hear it in there, like that, was horrible. I would much rather you have just talked to me about it."
She looked at me for a minute and nodded. Tears started to fall down her face and she looked down.
"Maggie," I sighed. I reached a hand out to wipe away the tears. Even though I was furious, it still hurt to see her cry.
She stopped my hand. "I was nineteen." she started. "I was a freshman in college and as soon as I left the farm I became a huge party girl and a crazy drunk." she said. "So, on one of the many nights I got too drunk, I hooked up with some guy in his dorm." she said. I couldn't really see Maggie doing that now. "A few weeks after, my period was late, which used to never happen. I took some tests and-" she cried again.
"Maggie, it's okay." I said.
"No it's not Glenn." she sobbed. "When you met me, when you and the rest of the group came to the farm, I was exactly what I was supposed to be. I was a farm hand, a daddy's girl-" she whispered. "I was a good girl. Just like I always should have been. I never wanted you to see me as anything other than that."
"I'll always seen you as that." I said.
"Really? After all of this?" she asked. "It's one thing to hear Beth laugh about when Maggie came home drunk one night and Daddy yelled at her, but it's another to hear about the really dark stuff that came along with it." she said. "It was a really bad time for me, Glenn."
I looked at her, the moonlight reflecting her salty cheeks and the pain in her eyes. Though she was sad, I knew who she was. "Maggie, I'll always see you for exactly who you are." I grabbed her hand. "You're the person I fell in love with. You're my wife." I said. "You're Maggie. No matter what you've been through, you'll still always be the same person." I said.
She nodded. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it before."
I pushed a few strands of hair out of her face. "It's okay, Maggie. I'm not mad about anything you did. I'm not upset about it. I was just really caught off guard back there and I got freaked out."
"I can imagine." she said. "It's just really hard for me to talk about. The whole thing was awful. From the moment I found out until I was supposedly finished healing from everything. It was all horrible."
"Did your dad or Beth ever know?" I asked. "I can't imagine Herschel would have gone along with it."
She shrugged. "He'd supported more outrageous things when he was alive." she said. "But no, he didn't know. And Beth still doesn't so don't give me away."
"So you were alone?" I asked.
She nodded. "Yeah. I just went to the clinic by myself and they scheduled me. A few days later I went back." she closed her eyes. "Everything was so lonely. So cold. The doctor wasn't that great, the nurses were all really rude, and I just felt like I was being judged the whole time."
"I'm so sorry." I said.
She shrugged. "The worst part was after." she scoffed. "You're not supposed to do a whole lot and you're supposed to have someone caring for you. Of course, I didn't have anyone so it was just me washing bloodied sheets and crying a lot." she shook her head. "I felt so empty and gross after."
"You regret it?" I asked.
"No," she smirked. "Especially not now. I couldn't imagine having a four year old right now." she shook her head. "Damn, four years. It doesn't seem like that long ago. A thing like that, necessary as it might've been, really haunts you. You know?"
I nodded. I did know.
I understood what she meant when she said haunted. We all felt like that, or at least I did, all the time.
"Every time someone dies. Every time someone gets hurt. Hell, even when I kill walkers. I feel it. I feel the ghost of what should be standing over me." I said. "I should be delivering pizzas right now, right?"
She smiled and shook her head. "I guess. It is a Friday."
"It is?" I asked.
"I thought so." she said.
I scoffed and looked down, my fingers tracing the dirt below us. "Anyways, I feel it. Sometimes I'll pass by something that will make me think of my mom or one of my friends or even, like, teachers I had in school and I'll realize that what life is now isn't normal. No matter how hard we try to make it that way."
"It feels normal though." she said. "Life does. Or it does now anyways. We've been livin' it this way for so many days now that it might as well be." she grabbed my hand. "And things could be much worse." she scoffed. "Even if the world is dying."
I smirked. "You're right about that, Maggie." I said. "The world is dying but it doesn't matter. We're alive."
That's when it occurred to me. We really were alive. We might as well be dead but for our own purposes we weren't. Maggie and I had been given this time together, even if it was in this world and even if tomorrow could be the end for both of us, we were here.
Despite everything, we were alive. That's all that mattered until now.
"So, why would you do it again?" I asked.
"What?" she asked.
"You want to get rid of this baby?" I asked. She nodded. "Why?"
"Because we can't raise a baby, Glenn. It's not safe."
"Why not? Rick has a baby."
"Yeah, well Rick doesn't have a wife. His choices were made."
"Then let's make ours." I turned to her. "Maggie, with the way things are, I have to believe that everything happens for a reason. I have to believe that eventually the world will pull out of this and that we'll have normal lives again someday. Real normal."
"Do you think so?" she asked.
"Yeah," I nodded. "I do. And I think that, if the world is like this for a reason then that means that we're both here for a reason. We're together for a reason, Mags."
She started to cry. "Yeah?"
I glanced between her eyes. "Maggie, for whatever reason, I've been blessed with all this extra time. We both have. We have the time that others didn't and I don't want to waste that. There's a reason for it." I said. "We can't be scared."
"But I am scared." she said.
"Don't be. We can't be scared of tomorrow or the future or walkers because if we live in fear we won't ever live. We can't just wait to die." I said. "Because we'll just die waiting."
"We're alive." she agreed.
"So let's start living."
She smiled. "How do we do that?"
I put my hand on her stomach. "I think we've already started."
"Okay," she smiled at me. "Now what?"
"You know Dr. Peters is a really good doctor."
"Yeah, I like him a lot."
"Okay, good. He seems to really know what he's doing and what he's talking about."
"You're right." she said.
"Well, I think he's good enough to deliver this baby." I said. "I think that we're smart enough to raise this baby."
"Glenn, I can't. You know what happened to Lori."
"I know, I know." I said. "But this is different."
"How?"
I shook my head. "No one has to die." I said. "No you, not the baby. No one has to go anywhere."
"But we don't know that Glenn." she said.
"When Lori delivered Judith walkers were attacking. I mean, your dad was supposed to help her deliver, not you. There were so many other factors that went into why things with Lori went the way they did." I said. "But we have a real doctor who really knows what he is doing and who could really help us." she nodded. "I think we should do this. I think we can do this."
Tears ran down her face. "You think we can do this?"
"Mags, of course we can. We've done everything life has thrown at us so far. No matter what it was." I said. "Life just keeps giving us death, but for once it's given us life. Why kill it?"
She nodded. "You want to have a baby with me?" she smiled.
I laughed. "Well I can't think of anyone else I would want a baby with."
"Good." she said.
"Well, maybe Daryl. I'd have a baby with Daryl for sure." I said.
She leaned her shoulder into me so I tipped over.
I laughed and sat up. "So what do you think?"
She giggled. "We're having a baby?"
"Do you want to have a baby?" I asked.
She looked at me then nodded. Her face beamed with happiness. "We're having a baby."
Yep. Like I said...short but cute at the end...not much to it.
Anyways leave me a review telling me if you love/hate it & telling me what the baby's name and gender should be. THROW THEM IDEAS AT ME! Let me know where you think the story is going and give me some inspiration for future chapters!
Thanks for reading!
We. All. Got. Jobs. To. Do.
~MaggieRhee
