Thanks for all your patience. I love each and every one of you. Enjoy the chapter!

Summary: An opportunity arises... but will Goku take it?

Warning: Sex, Drug Abuse, Hints of Rape

Disclaimer: I do not own DB/Z/GT or the characters involved. All canon characters belong to Akira Toriyama.


Indulgence Chapter 10

Loud sirens were sounding throughout the massive corridors of one of Frieza's refueling stations, the floors shaking under foot as soldiers ran down the halls and barked orders at each other in every which direction. Red flashes of light followed with the alarm, everyone's actions stopping only briefly when the ship was rocked with an explosive blast. There was an odd sense of controlled chaos going around as Frieza's fleet began to prepare their defenses, all of us finding ourselves under a surprise attack by an unknown enemy. It was as much a shock to me as it was to everyone else, but I had little time to think about the how and why just like everyone else. The ship was rocked again by another onslaught of enemy fire and I stopped in the middle of a corridor to gather my thoughts and get my senses about me, trying my damnedest to remember the layout of the vessel. My pack had only stopped on the refueling station for a few short hours before needing to report in to Frieza's main vessel after a successful patrolling mission, and all of us had been taken off guard from the random attack.

I needed to get off the ship and as fast as possible without detection and now was my only chance.

Frenzied rookies ran past me and collided into one another as the vessel was hit with another wave of explosions, my eyes barely able to catch sight of enemy cruisers that flew by the windows—black in color with a curved, streamlined build, nearly impossible to trace in the darkness of space. My skull screamed in pain as sonic booms resonated around me from massive corridors blowing in half from the explosions, high-pitched ringing piercing my ears as I began running down the corridors again towards the escape pods. Through the ringing in my head and the shouting of the soldiers, I could have sworn I heard the voice of Vegeta calling out for me. It made me stop for just a second and look around, feeling a chill run up my spine. 'Just keep running!' I told myself and forced my tired legs to go. I ducked under larger warriors and pushed past panicked guards, shaking my head to rid myself of the annoyances in my ears. Whatever it was I heard, I just needed to keep going—I needed to escape.

I finally found myself at the bottom deck of the refueling station and made thanks to whatever gods out there for my luck at also locating several unoccupied escape pods. 'This is my chance..!' I breathed shakily as I took a step towards a control panel to one of the pods, feeling my stomach churn with nausea. There was no turning back if I escaped now. There couldn't be any question in my mind.

"Kakarot…!"

It was his voice again. I could recognize it anywhere. If I wanted to get off the refueling station, then I would need to stay focused and ignore whatever voice called out to me—real or fake. The ringing in my ears had finally subsided when I entered in my credentials for the control panel of the escape pod, my nerves causing my hands to shake as I typed away.

"Kakarot!"

This time the voice was different—heavier. Before I had a chance to turn, I felt a large hand clamp down on my shoulder, the scent of the stranger filling my nose and pulling me ill at ease. "Raditz…" I felt a knot in my throat when his hand tightened on my muscle.

"What do you think you're doing?" My brother asked me, keeping me still as the station rocked again.

The hair on the back of my neck stood up and I refused to look my brother in the face, the palm of my hand keeping steady over the launch button on the panel for my escape pod. I swallowed and kept my breathing steady, "You know what I'm doing, Raditz." I told him matter-of-factly, readying myself for any sort of combat I may have to face.

There was silence for what seemed like hours as soldiers ran past us and the station crumbled and boomed. We both knew there wasn't a reason to escape the attack -we were more than capable of taking care of ourselves and the enemy- but this was something more; something deeper. My brother's hand never left my shoulder, keeping its tight grip on me as if preventing me from leaving. "Kakarot…" He started but had nothing more to say, the inflection in his voice when he said my name sounding tense and eager.

"I have to do this, Raditz." I stayed firm with him, remaining with my eyes locked on my escape pod that was simply waiting for the push of a button.

The pack had deteriorated over one chaos-induced night just days ago, and I couldn't bring myself to even look at my brother. I felt shame and guilt, and he one was of the last people I wanted to see before I tried to make a break for it. It was all different now; everything had been exposed to the surface and it was ugly. I didn't want to be a part of it—I couldn't.

Everything was still as fresh in my mind as if I had happened moments ago...


We had just been given an assignment by Zarbon –as directed by Frieza- to clear a planet of hostiles so that he could drain it of its core energy before destroying it completely. It had been easy enough—for once the hostiles were only massive creatures, and the takeover was as easy as wiping them out and attaching a building-sized core destabilizer into the planet. As soon as it was done, a simple switch had to be flipped over on our ship and the machine would do the rest of the job. Everything had gone according to plan as everyone knew their specific assignment for setting up the destabilizer, watching as it began to dig its sharp drill down into the rock of the planet. It would take only 20 minutes for the drill to complete before the latch could be switched over to turn on destabilizer—just enough time for the pack to unwind briefly from one another.

While the assignment was simple, the entire pack was on edge and had been feeding off of the paranoid energy of our leader, the Prince of Saiyans. He was furious and offended to be performing assignments for Frieza's goons –especially Zarbon- and made showy, aggressive displays of his antipathy at all times. His kills were over the top, he behaved more animalistically, and he cursed and murmured to himself more frequently. When Vegeta was in this state the pack knew better than to get in his way, but I felt I should be there for him to help him work through dealing with his anger. As expected, closer I tried to get, the more he pushed me away, insisting that he knew how to take care of himself. All I could do was sit on the end of the bed and watch him as he snorted a line of shimmering blue powder off of his scouter lens. The Prince's constant bomba usage only added to his paranoid thinking, and his mood swings kept me on edge—hell, it kept the entire pack on edge. I stayed by his side and catered to his barking commands, fetching him water and food, cleaning up the damage he made when he threw a fit, and doing my best to talk him off of any ledge he found himself on. If it wasn't for him or for me, it was for the rest of the pack. He had already gotten into a scrap with Nappa and left the large Saiyan with a nasty rip halfway up his ear- all because he had questioned Vegeta's tactics for the assignment. At this point, the last thing I wanted to do was cross him.

During the brief drilling period, I accompanied him in his private quarters to make sure that he didn't do anything drastic that would cause our trip to drag on. Upon my finding him, he was already pacing back and forth in front of the bed and cursing to himself, hyped up on bomba with wide, dilated eyes. I tried to speak to him with calm, even tones, but it seemed to agitate him more. He was fixated on Zarbon and angry that we were doing his menial work, comparing us to lowly slaves instead of the great warriors that we were. I made the mistake of playing devil's advocate, claiming that Zarbon was only following orders and that he didn't have much of a choice—just like us. "You sound just like Raditz," He would spit at me and I found it curious that my brother had even dared to stand up for the General. Was it possible that Raditz was starting to share more about the cyan-skinned alien now? When I probed for more information about his statement, he went off on a tangent about Raditz losing focus due to 'pretty greendistractions'and how our recent assignments were all connected on a greater scheme due in some part to Zarbon. He complained about my brother being too soft from all of the attention he was getting, and I flippantly commented on how I couldn't blame him—the comment seemed harmless enough, especially since it looked as though Raditz was sharing more about his secret lover to others than I had thought. This time Vegeta started doing the prying, jabbing his finger into my chest and getting into my face, demanding to know what I knew about the organization between Zarbon and Raditz and the arrangement of our assignments. I tried to back track from the path I had started down, but Vegeta's predatory eyes were locked onto mine, wanting to detect any signs of deception coming from me, the smaller man practically backing me into a corner.

"Vegeta, please! I only know what you do." I assured him and smiled, daring even to reach out and put my hand on his arm. He studied me with a scowl, tensing up the moment I touched him.

After what seemed like an eternity, he finally spoke, "So there is something going on?"

"What?" I was startled at such a direct question.

"You told me that you know as much as I do. And I know that there is something going on with Raditz and one of Frieza's men." Vegeta hissed at me and kept me cornered. Something in my gut told me that there was serious trouble brewing inside of the Prince and there was no stopping it.

"How would you know that?" I tried to brush it off. I tried to make this all out to be nothing. I tried to imagine that Vegeta was simply being paranoid and manipulating my words for his own satisfaction. But just how much did he really know?

"I know everything about my pack, Kakarot. I am your leader, and I am your Prince!" He barked and his tail snapped behind him.

"Vegeta…" I exhaled and put my hand behind my head with nervous habit, finally looking way from his intense, accusatory gaze.

That was all it took to tip the scales into Vegeta's paranoid favor, the Prince taking my nervous body language as either proving my guilt, or confirming his delusion. There was something sinister behind his dilated eyes and I feared what insanity was going on in his bomba fueled mind. Before I could say something, the door opened to the quarters, breaking the tense moment between the Prince and I. Nappa and Raditz both stepped inside with dirt on their armor and sweat on their brows from a quick spar, most likely reporting in to inform Vegeta that the drilling was over. They could both sense that something was wrong and looked to the Prince, all of us watching as he thrust his finger towards Raditz.

He let out a deep growl and bellowed out, "Your horrendous monstrosities that you have committed against the sanctity of this pack will not go unpunished…"


Raditz's hand still never left my shoulder as an eerie silence fell over the ship, the attacks stopping just briefly. I felt him tug me towards him and I finally let out a deep sigh, deciding I could spare just a couple more minutes. I slowly turned my body away from the control panel of the escape pod and looked at my brother, the guilt and shame over what had happened to him gnawing a hole in my stomach. His face was black and blue with the twisted marks of bruises, one of his eyes swollen shut from his massive injuries. We were still a couple days away from Planet 79 where he could get proper medical attention, so he was forced to suffer through the pain his wounds were causing him; it was an awful sight to see.

"Raditz…" I didn't even know what to say to him, where to even begin.

"I can't stop you…" He confided to me, keeping his voice steady and calm as the ship was wracked again with an onslaught of explosive attacks. Part of me believed that he didn't want to stop me, while another part of me knew I could easily overpower him if he tried to. Regardless of what it was, he was giving me the opportunity and I knew this was the only chance I had.

"I'm sorry…" I finally sputtered out as I stared at the floor, no longer able to look at him. "I didn't… I didn't mean for any of this to happen…" I couldn't tell if I was talking to him about the attack, or if I meant the entire ordeal of me being here. It was all a mistake now, I know that. "I never meant for you to get hurt…" I wasn't able to continue further, memories of what happened to my brother still fresh in my mind and too painful to relive.


What unfolded before me would forever haunt me until my dying days. And all I did was stare in mute terror as it played out like a sick play.

All eyes were on my brother as Vegeta's gloved finger was fixated on him, his eyes wild with crazed emotion as his body shook. I felt his manic energy flow through me like an icy chill, making me shiver and hypersensitive to my surroundings. I knew that if I was feeling this way, I could only imagine the effect it was having on my counterparts. Within the blink of an eye, Nappa had my brother in a choke-hold and Vegeta had rammed his fist into his gut. The sound that emitted from Raditz's mouth was enough to snap me out of my shock and begin to react, running towards them and demanding they stop, only to be knocked down by the sheer force of Vegeta's volatile energy. The Prince was hissing in Raditz's face, wanting to know what he was doing with Zarbon while continuing to give him an onslaught of punches to his gut. By the time I was on my feet and running to the aid of my brother, Nappa had thrown Raditz to the ground and joined in Vegeta's questioning and brutal onslaught. When I reached them, I was snarled and charged at as the two Saiyan men dared me to challenge them, insisting that Raditz was going to pay for betraying the pack and there was nothing I could do to stop them. My instincts were screaming me to stay away from the stronger males, but the gasping noises of my brother pushed me past all the alarms. I lashed out towards Nappa first and I swung my fist at his head, knocking him away from Raditz before shooting a blast of ki towards Vegeta to startle him off. I knew it would only give me a few seconds of time, but I felt it was all I needed to get between them and Raditz. I raised my power level as high as I could possibly muster and got into a defensive stance, but a hand on my shoulder grabbed my attention, spinning around to see that Raditz was on his feet and already spitting blood. He demanded to know what I had told Vegeta, shaking me for an answer, but all I did was sputter and shake my head. Before I could do anything more, I was blind-sided by Vegeta and crushed through a wall, feeling a fury of fists pound into me. I heard knuckles cracking and blood splattering from the Prince's onslaught, fearing for my life that Vegeta would actually bludgeon me to death. I did what I could to fight back, but his bomba-fueled attack was impossible to defend against. It wasn't until a pained howl was ripped through the ship that made Vegeta stop, looking over his shoulder to see what the commotion was. I was throbbing in pain and seeing black, gasping for air and glancing up at the Prince. His fists were soaked in my blood and shaking, while he was baring his sharp teeth as he watched whatever was causing the noise. He finally jumped off of me and I rolled over onto my side, feeling dizzy and hot in my throbbing head. I watched as Vegeta stormed over to where Nappa had my brother by his sensitive tail, the long-haired Saiyan on his hands and knees and whining in pain. I reached out towards Raditz and begged for Vegeta not to kill him, too incapacitated from the attack to get up and help. "Oh, I'm not going to kill him…" Vegeta growled and circled my brother, snatching his tail from Nappa's hand and giving it a hard squeeze. I closed my eyes at the sounds of Raditz nearly sob with pain, feeling my ears begin to ring and fill with liquid, steadily losing the battle with consciousness. I forced myself to open them only to see that Nappa and Vegeta were stripping my brother naked and beginning to position themselves on either end of him. My stomach churned with horror at the realization at what was about to happen and I tried to cry out again to get the Saiyan's to stop. But my pleas fell on deaf ears and the blackness started to take over. I couldn't hold it together any longer as my brother started to get brutally sodomized in the other room by our very own pack, and I blacked out.


The vessel shook again with another attack from the sleek black enemy cruisers and it brought me back to reality. Raditz was still holding onto my shoulder and our eyes were locked together. I had such a rush of emotions course through me I struggled to make a decision. Even with the perfect chance to get away, I was still stuck in my tracks and trying to make excuses not to go. How could I possibly leave Vegeta without as much as a goodbye? How could I leave knowing that Raditz's life would possible end without my protecting him? If I did leave, would Vegeta come after me or would worse—would Frieza's army come after me? What would Vegeta do to the pack if I left? What would he do to himself?

Another thought haunted my mind even worse than the others: What if I couldn't go back? I couldn't remember the last time King Kai and I connected, and there was a possibility that the link was lost forever. I hadn't considered what I would do if I was stuck in this universe and I didn't want to find out. "Raditz…" I started but he shushed me, his hand moving from my shoulder up to my head, brushing away my bangs.

"It's OK, Kakarot…" He whispered and held the back of head with his large hand.

"I don't belong here…" I finally admitted, my voice falling to a whisper as well, my throat feeling tight with emotion.

Raditz pulled me towards him and pressed our foreheads together, each of us purring from the intimate contact. "I know, Kakarot… I've known since the beginning..." He admitted to me finally, causing tears to spring to my eyes.

He had known all along I was an imposter, and still he didn't care.

He took me in and laid his life on the line for me, keeping my own secret for me this entire time. How could I have been so ignorant? He could have exposed me for what I truly was, but he kept me safe and he tried to teach me the ways of our people. He did all of this without my knowing, and I couldn't even do the same for him. I was a damned fool, and I deserved all of this.

"Samahani…" I apologized in our own tongue and flushed in embarrassment when I felt him flick away a tear that had escaped from my eye.

"Wewe ni ndugu yanga… You are my brother, Kakarot…" Raditz gave me a soft smile and rubbed our noses together, reaffirming our solid bond to each other.

Our moment was short lived as the area around us was suddenly under fire with explosive attacks, causing the walls to come crumbling down. The suction of the hole pulled away warriors and debris into outer space like a massive vacuum, causing both my brother and I to have to use our energy and strength to stay in one place. I looked to Raditz with worried eyes and he gave me a reassuring grin. "Go, Kakarot… Don't worry about me." He then stepped away from me, letting his hand linger just a moment longer on my shoulder. How could I possible leave now?

"Kakarot!" A voice called out over the noise of the chaos and it made me freeze in my place. I looked across the corridor and saw Vegeta standing on a raised platform just a few meters away, his eyes wide with shock. He seemed genuinely surprised to see Raditz and I together at the escape pods, and I felt a tinge of fear at his presence.

Suddenly Raditz shove me away from him as he slammed his fist on the launch button of the control panel. He turned around to face Vegeta with a growl, his large tail lashing behind him in a challenging manner. I ran over to the escape pod that was starting itself up but stopped to look over my shoulder, still feeling like a coward for running away. My eyes locked with Vegeta's as the station around him began to fall apart, his sharp onyx eyes never leaving my own. "Kakarot…!" He called after me again and began to levitate in the air, acting as though he would come right for me.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry…" I managed to sputter out before turning my back on the Prince and rushing to get inside of the escape pod before the hatch closed itself.

Within seconds the inside of the pod lit up and hummed as it began to prepare for its emergency take off, a 10 second countdown starting to sound off. I pressed my face against the window of the pod to catch one last look at my brother and the Prince. Vegeta had already closed the gap between himself and Raditz, throwing a punch to his gut to easily overpower him, and was running towards the emergency deck. I couldn't tear myself away from the window as he finally made it to my pod and just stared at me, his hand having reached up to press against the glass where my own hand was. I saw the betrayal and pain in his eyes and it made my heart ache, watching as he shook his head in disbelief and mouthed the word 'please' to me.

"Vegeta…" I whimpered, knowing that this was it; this was goodbye.

Before I could do anything more, the countdown had finished and my pod released itself from the refueling station, launching away into the blackness of space and blasting itself as far away as possible from its coordinates. There was utter chaos going on outside the station as Frieza's warriors and enemy ships collided, causing catastrophic damage to anything that got in the middle of it. As my pod continued to careen itself through the battlefield, I managed to catch another glimpse at a larger enemy vessel that hovered above the tiny planet, swearing that I saw the image of red-skinned warriors that hailed from the darkest edges of galaxy- One that I was ultimately too familiar with in this universe.

Within the blink of an eye, my space pod locked itself onto pre-programmed emergency coordinates and disappeared from the exploding scene using its FTL jump drive. It would be the last time I would ever see my pack again.


I had received a phone call from Bulma early in the morning, my blue-haired friend keeping her voice hushed as if she didn't want anyone to hear her on her end. She hated to bother me and insisted that Yamcha would be beyond upset if he knew what she was up to, making me promise her that the conversation would stay between us. After assuring her that she could trust me, she told me what had been bothering her—Vegeta was missing, and had been for over a week now. She was used to him taking off and being absent for a few days at a time, but this time it had been nearly 10 days without so much as a word from him. "I know it's none of my business anymore what he does with his time, but that doesn't mean I still don't worry about him." She repeated more than once, as if trying to justify her actions. It was known by everyone now that she and Yamcha were together, especially after their public announcement of having secretly eloped, and it was a mystery to us all how Vegeta was taking it. It seemed the mystery had been solved, and now it was up to me to go and track him down.

"Please, Goku… I still care about him." She begged me and I gave in with a heavy sigh, knowing that I was most likely the last person that Vegeta wanted to see. Yet in a sense, I was curious too. It wasn't like him to disappear –unlike me- and concerning thoughts ran through my mind as I got my clothes on and prepared to leave.

I flew around and checked the usual spots where we sparred or where he liked to train outside, but found no evidence of him being around. I expanded my search and checked Kami's lookout, speaking briefly to Dende and Piccolo if the Prince had made an appearance lately. The green men confirmed he hadn't and Piccolo made the suggestion that Vegeta may have left the planet to 'blow off some steam.'

"Bulma gives him a ship sometimes…" He claimed and it surprised me, having no idea that my Saiyan counterpart did such trips. I wondered how long he had been doing such a thing, to what extent he was blowing off his steam, and at what cost to others around him? Dende assured me that the Prince was still on the planet, much to Piccolo's disdain, and I thanked them, continuing on my way with a greater sense of urgency than I had before.

After what seemed like hours of flying around and hitting dead ends, I finally decided to hone in on my senses and searched for his ki. Vegeta had all the tricks in the book to mask his energy and did so very well when he didn't want to be found, but after years of experience I had learned how to get past his blocks and distractions. I relaxed myself and closed my eyes, focusing all of my will and energy to stretch out my senses as far as I could muster, probing for information across Earth's energy and following the icy trail of the Saiyan Prince. Just as my skull began to pound with pressure, I finally picked up a faint whisper of his ki and locked onto it, placing two of my fingers onto my head to blur time and space and instantly transported myself to him.

When I appeared, I found myself on a sandy beach with shimmering, silver-blue water crashing up onto shore and reaching out to a vast ocean as far as the eye could see. The breeze was strong as dark storm clouds began to roll in from the distance. I looked around the area to see that I was on a small tropical island, scanning the sand dunes and palm trees in search of the Prince. It only took a few minutes of searching the island before I stumbled across a surprising scene that caused me to flush all over—Vegeta was sound asleep on his back in the sand and completely nude. The sun washed over his naked form and his skin was dark in color, sweat and saltwater clinging to his muscular body. I couldn't help but lick my lips at the scene, never having seen him in such a vulnerable, sensual state. My heart was racing as I greedily continued to gawk at the sight before me, pulling at my shirt to cool down my suddenly hot body, finding it hard to move my legs because of the pressure between them. I had seen the Prince naked before—it's not as if he was ever shy. But seeing him like this, as if almost presented to me, was different, and it made me start to sweat. I blamed it on the tropical heat and did my best to shake it off, clearing my throat and stepping out from behind the sand dunes to approach him.

"Vegeta?" I called out, wondering how he would react to seeing me after he had gone out of his way to stay hidden. When I didn't get a response, I got closer to him and called out his name again, this time with more concern, "Vegeta?"

He finally stirred and groaned, slowly opening his eyes to look up at me. "Kakarot?" He questioned and blinked a few times, moving himself to sit up in the sand and give a long stretch of his torso. "What are you doing here?" He yawned and shook his head, finally looking back to me with what seemed to be red, glazed eyes. His breath smelled strongly of alcohol.

"Just checking to see how you're doing… No one has heard from you in a while, hehe." I tried to keep the conversation light, looking everywhere but at him for fear that I would start to stare again.

"Hmph. No one blinks an eye when you leave for years at a time, but gods forbid I take off for a few days." He snorted and clumsily got himself onto his feet, brushing off the sand that covered his backside.

Before I could respond, he started to walk away from the surf and towards a clearing of trees, forcing me to have to hurry after him. "Actually, it's been almost 2 weeks." I corrected the Prince, following behind him as he casually led me to where he had been residing. I took in what looked to be primitive living quarters, seeing that he had sculpted the trees into a hut around a leaf bed and cooking pit, having a couple large rocks around to sit on, and a huge collection of alcohol hidden behind some palm leaves. Just as I was taking in the sights of Vegeta's hermit-like living space, I ran right into him and stumbled over, not having realized he had stopped in his tracks.

"Almost 2 weeks? Well, fuck." Vegeta cursed to himself and continued on walking, going into the hut and grabbing a half empty handle of cognac .

I stood awkwardly in the entry of the hut, hundreds of questions running through my mind, but knowing better than to confront the Prince with so much. He shoved the bottle in my direction to offer me some of the alcohol but I declined, watching instead as he lifted it to his mouth and took a few swigs. Deep in my gut I knew something was wrong, yet I felt at a loss of what to do. "Is everything OK?" I finally dared to ask him when he finished.

He started to cackle, putting down the bottle and wiping his mouth off. "I've never been better, Kakarot." He quipped and turned towards me, his body getting closer to mine. I could smell the alcohol, the sweat, the salt, and something else intoxicating, pouring off of his frame. I tried to swallow, but I had a knot the size of a fist in my throat.

"Have you been here this whole time?" I tried to redirect the situation as I felt that same heat creep into my body again. He had been slipping away from his family and his comrades, and it was important to get to the bottom of why.

"I took a trip before coming..." He slurred his words and looked away from me, peaking my interest at the comment.

"Into space?" I blurted out, somewhat wishing that what Piccolo had told me wasn't true.

Vegeta looked back at me and smirked, his eyebrows quirking up. "Ahh, so you finally found out! I wondered how long that would take…" He placed his hand beside my head on a tree trunk, moving even closer to me, enveloping me in his mixed scent.

"What do you do out there?" I was immediately direct with him, feeling my heart pound in my chest. The Prince knew nothing of personal space and frequently used it to his advantage. Now was not an exception.

"It's better you not know." He was just as direct with me, looking me in the eyes and holding my gaze as if to challenge me.

We stood in silence, measuring each other up and gaging what the other might do. I was already overstepping my boundaries by tracking him down in his private place and confronting him on his absence, so I knew if I pushed any further I was just asking to be attacked. I didn't go out of my way to find him just to have it end with a fight, so I took a deep breath and sighed, finally giving in. "You're right… It probably is better that I not know." I agreed, no longer wanting to agitate the already drunk Prince.

"So, tell me why you're really here…" Vegeta smirked at me again, still keeping his hand in its place and preventing me from moving away.

"You don't believe that I actually wanted to check on you?" I asked him, still feeling my heart pound.

"No." He stated matter-of-factly, never breaking eye contact with me.

"I'm sorry you feel that way." I countered, unable the hide the blush on my face as he called my bluff.

"You have no idea how I feel..." He growled at me, the deep vibrating noise rumbling from his scarred chest and causing the hairs on the back of my neck to stand. I realized then that his torso was pressed against me. Both of our heartbeats were racing together as we stared at each other. Our breathing was starting to become heavy as the heat between us continued to increase, the intoxicating musk that lingered in the air earlier fully engulfing us now. Even though I didn't have a drink, I felt drunk and dizzy. I couldn't think straight as Vegeta's hand finally moved down from the tree to smooth against my chest, his skin hot to the touch. He inched closer to me with the tilt of his head and I felt myself succumb to the heat, closing my eyes and parting my lips with a gasp, ready for whatever was about to come next.

But nothing happened.

My eyes popped open to find that Vegeta had pulled away and he was looking at the ground, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked deep in thought. "Vegeta…?" I breathed out, completely flustered and now somewhat embarrassed.

"Well you found me, Kakarot." He pushed away from me completely and grabbed the handle of cognac again, having another long gulp before tossing it to the side. "Now tell that damned woman to leave me the hell alone!" He snorted and strolled out of the hut, heading towards the thundering clouds and crashing waves of the ocean.

"Vegeta, wait!" I followed him out of the trees and partially down the beach, but came to a stop once he disappeared into the sea.

There was no point in chasing after the Prince once he was in the water, knowing he was a much faster swimmer than I. Raindrops began to steadily fall onto the sand and my face as the storm finally reached the tiny island. I watched for any signs of the prince in the water, regardless of how much of a moot point it was, standing in the rain and wishing already I had done things differently. I felt guilt and a strange sense of heartache, realizing there was still so much more to the Prince than I would ever know. It seemed that at every chance I had to get close to Vegeta, I am either too ignorant to the situation or I mess it up completely, all because I still barely know anything about him.

Soon that would change.

It was only a matter of time before I would get to know Vegeta better than I ever had.

And after our meeting today, I was more ready than ever to leave.


'Beep….. Beep…. Beep…'

I had been adrift in space for hours, my escape pod on auto-pilot towards a destination I didn't care about. I was alone in the emptiness and silence of the pod, only the hum of the engine and the silent beeping of the controls keeping me company.

My face was buried in my arms as I finally allowed myself to break down, sobbing against the seat of the ship as reality came crashing down around me. I had betrayed my brother's trust and caused him an agonizing backlash from the pack; I had cowardly ran away from the Prince, who's spiraling behavior cried out the most for help; I selfishly forgot about my own universe, my own friends, family, and ultimately my own Prince to indulge in a destructive fantasy, and now it was probably too late to go home.

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry…" I kept repeating to myself, unsure of who or what I was apologizing for as the tears continued to stream down my face.

I couldn't get the image of Vegeta's face out of my mind in the last seconds that we saw each other, seeing the panic and rejection in his onyx eyes at his realization that I was leaving him. My heart ached for him and I found myself wanting nothing more than to have him in my arms again, missing his scent and his touch.

But another part of me couldn't get the monstrosity of my brother's brutal attack out of my mind either. I saw a part of the Prince that frightened me to the core, bringing back memories of when he and I first met in my own universe. I was finally remembering the blood-crazed psychopath that tore my friends and planet apart, the violent, murderous look in his eyes something that I swore I wouldn't forgot. I had only seen him like that one other time when he had ben possessed as a Majin, and I still remember then how I feared for my life. I kept telling myself he was not really himself during the crisis of Buu, but maybe deep down Vegeta really was just a psychopath bubbling under the surface, waiting once again for the perfect chance to slaughter as much as he could.

"No! No… I won't believe that!" I yelled at myself and clenched my fists. The Prince had deteriorated within weeks and had become increasingly paranoid and hostile. I knew that the bomba had something to do with its severity as well. I should have –could have- stopped it well before his addiction got out of hand, but I was being too selfish in satisfying my own needs.

"This is my fault…" I whined and looked out of the window into the blackness of space, full of guilt and heartache.

I thought that if I had been in Vegeta's life sooner, I could have prevented whatever caused his pain. I thought that if I got to know him on a more personal, Saiyan-like level, we would be able to connect and his walls would come down. Instead, I added fuel to the fire and helped to create the unstable, paranoid mess that he was. I was a fool for thinking there was anything I could do to alter who Vegeta truly was, and I was a fool for taking on such an indulgent mission when I knew damned well that it was likely to fall apart. I was lying to myself in the beginning when I came into this universe, only using my brother to selfishly get to the Prince. I knew that Raditz, and Nappa even, would help me to act more like the Saiyan I was born to be so I could get closer to him, and I knew that I would be deceiving each and every one of them with a ridiculous façade that even I at times find myself shocked even worked. Maybe they were just as desperate to be with others like themselves, just like me, that it didn't matter the reasoning behind the how or why— all that mattered was that we were together, even if it ended in catastrophic failure.

Maybe it was just my fate as a Saiyan that I was doomed to forever wander the universe in search of answers that would never be given to me, no matter how much I tried to change or adapt. Would now be the time that I would start to go mad, like all the other surviving Saiyans before me did? With each one that I ever met –Turles, Broly, Paragus, Nappa, Raditz, Vegeta- they had already taken a dive into insanity, their madness controlling their very will to live. There was no reasoning or logic to them and it ultimately always led to their demise. Was this a life that I would soon be cursed to live with, once I finally stopped the search for answers? Hell, was it possible that I was already mad?

I looked out of the window of the escape pod and stared into the blackness of space. My tears had finally subsided and I was utterly exhausted, catching a glimpse of my reflection in the glass and seeing my dark-circled eyes and sunken cheeks. I wondered if this is what Vegeta was going through in my universe, facing the onset of insanity and barley being able to hold on this time. How he had managed to keep it together for so long the way that he did? I could barely stand the emotional turmoil that this entire experience was causing me, so I couldn't even begin to fathom a lifetime of it.

"If I am doomed to be mad, then I'd rather be home…" I finally decided, sitting up fully in the cockpit and looking down at the controls.

I was thankful that I had taken the time with Raditz to learn the basic mechanics behind a personal pod, doing my best to ignore my guilt as I remembered his voice telling me how to set up coordinates for a FTL jump drive. I had no clue where I was in this certain galaxy and wanted to get to a more familiar location before I started trying to stretch my senses, thus exposing myself to any sort of enemies in the area. I slowly put in the numbers for an outpost I was familiar with in a neighboring galaxy and started the jump drive, smiling sadly to myself. With the flash of the engine and the blink of an eye, my pod appeared in the atmosphere of a desolate and barren planet. The ship descended lower towards the planet faster and faster and broke through the reddish-brown clouds, sounding an alarm to let me know that we were about to land in typical dramatic, pod-like fashion. I braced myself for impact as the red, barren scenery came into view very quickly right before the pod crashed through several boulders and a hillside, coming to a stop only after making a decent-sized crater in the ground. I shook my head to rid myself of the pounding it received from the landing and slammed on the button to open the hatch, stumbling out of the pod and into paste-like, red dirt. I got to my feet and hurried out of the crater, looking around at the wasteland that I knew was safe from creatures or invaders alike—my pack made sure of that on that fateful day when they first met me here.

I slid down to sit cross-legged on the dirt and closed my eyes, clasping my hands together and concentrating all of my ki and telekinetic energy to work as one force. I fought the different contending forces of the universe around me and searched out for the connection that I once had with a dear old friend.

"King Kai… If you can hear me… It's me, Goku…" I started, speaking out loud as if to truly enunciate my intentions to anyone willing to listen. Gods knew that it would take a miracle at this point to get me back home.

/…/

"I know it's been a long time… And I'm sorry for that." I felt ashamed at coming to my Master in such a pathetic way, desperately hoping that he was still out there. I stretched my senses even further and felt my head begin to gently pulsate, slowly down time and space around me as I searched the universe with lightning speed.

/…/

"I was weak, King Kai… You were right to deny me this favor. I wasn't able to handle such independence… I-… I was a fool to think I wouldn't screw this up…"

/…/

"I should have just left the past where it belonged... It wasn't my right to try and change it."

/…/

"I should have… I should have left Vegeta alone…" I finally admitted, more so to myself than to him.

I stayed silent for several minutes as I thought about the Prince and how he all but begged me to leave his past alone, or how he refused to talk to me about our race and culture because it pained him too much. While I was so busy worrying about what I wanted, I never really considered what my counterpart may have wanted instead. My heart started to ache again at the thought of him, hoping I haven't lost my chance to see him.

"King Kai, please… Please let me know you can feel me…" I pushed the limits of my abilities, feeling myself start to become lightheaded

/…/

"I can't do this anymore… Please… Help me!"

/Goku?!/

Suddenly there was a ping and the connection was open, filling me with the familiar, warm sensation that was King Kai's energy. I was overcome with joy at the realization that all was not lost and that there might be a chance I would be able to go home.

"King Kai! Oh man, you have no idea how happy I am to finally hear your voice!" I exclaimed, opening my eyes as if half expecting him to be right in front of me.

/Do you know how long I've been trying to get ahold of you?!/

"I know, King Kai… I'm sorry…"

/You even ignored me! I have half a mind to just leave you there!/

I deserved the scolding that King Kai was giving me. I had deceived him into allowing me to come to this universe, and I had deliberately gone against all of his instruction for being here. I betrayed his trust and rubbed it in his face when I cut the connection between us. After everything I had done, I would not question his decision on leaving me high and dry in a volatile universe.

"Forgive me…" I started, feeling overwhelmed with guilt, "I was a fool… A damned fool…"

/Sigh… Well, I wouldn't go that far—/

"No, King Kai, it's true. I was a fool for coming here and I was a fool for thinking I could handle it all…" I looked up to the dirty, reddish-brown sky, missing the blues and greens of planet Earth. Oh, how I had taken it for granted. If I returned, I swore to myself I would never leave again.

/Goku… Is everything alright?/

"Please, King Kai… I just want to come home..."

/…/

Finally after a few long moments, I heard the snapping and crackling of energy next to me. The action caused me to stand to my feet, watching with baited breath as open space began to bend and shape into a sphere, lightening and energy popping around it. I clenched my fists and prepared myself, knowing that once the portal was opened I only had seconds to get through it. A black, circular shape appeared and grew larger, massive amounts of energy rushing around me and causing the dirt to stir.

The portal was open at last.

I took a step forward but hesitated, looking behind me to observe the landscape and catching a glimpse of my escape pod in its crater. There was still just enough fuel to jump back to Planet 79 if I wanted to. I could go back and wait for the pack to arrive, maybe even sneak off with my brother and get one more smell or look at my Prince… but then what? And to what end? What would be the point of going back?

I gave another deep sigh and looked back towards the portal, knowing that there would be no turning back once I stepped through. I gathered up what strength I had left and finally jumped through the portal, getting sucked into the wormhole. I began careening through a blur of color and energy, closing my eyes to prevent myself from getting sick at the experience. I pictured my pack and the experiences that they gave me, I pictured my brother and all the wisdom he tried to instill on me, and I pictured the Prince and his smiling face. The private memories we shared would be ones that I would forever cherish.

At last I was flung into fluffy golden clouds and landed none so gracefully onto a tiny, grassy planet. The air was warm and fresh, causes my senses to overload with stimulation. I opened my eyes to see the pink sky and the wind blowing overhead, bringing some wetness to my eyes. I could feel my friend's energy around the planet, sensing my family was nearby and that hardly anything had changed while I was gone. A single tear rolled down my cheek when I realized where I was.

I was finally home.


A/N: I think it's important to note again (for those who have forgotten or are calling BS) how low Goku's power level is in this universe. He has even commented on this on a few occasions in previous chapters. Also, NO, the new DBS does not apply to this universe or story.

Translations: "Samahani" = "I'm sorry"; "bomba" = "intergalactic cocaine"; FTL = Faster Than Light