He stared as she walked away.
One step, two step… her figure became smaller, blurred by the curtain of raindrops.
He found himself following her, almost involuntarily.
Picking up his pace, her figure became clearer, bigger.
The next second, he found his arms around her; the umbrella was cast aside and fell on the ground, blooming like a dark flower.
She stopped, and stood there. Raising her hand, she patted his hand, which was gripping on her shoulders.
"Let go." She said softly.
He said nothing in return; his grip around her did not loosen.
He dug his nose into her blonde sandy hair, greedily breathing in the scent of her.
"Shikamaru, let go." She repeated herself; her voice was soft, but firm.
This time, he obliged.
His embrace fell apart, as he shoved his hands back into his pocket.
"Temari." He called her name, sending a slight shiver down her spine.
She looked him in the eye, she was not sure what are those water droplets cascading their way across his somewhat feminine features – tears? Rainwater?
His eyelids fluttered, his lips visbly trembling.
But she could definitely tell the scent coming out of his mouth – sake.
"Temari, I…" She stopped him, with her finger gently pressing on his lips.
"Let's talk when you're sober." She gave him a faint smile, as she picked up the umbrella from the ground.
"But I am." She knew better.
She said nothing, and nudged him gently, urging him to start moving.
Holding it above their heads, she said nothing as they took another turn around the street corner.
He attempted to take the umbrella from her – his hand felt static as his fingers brushed across her hand.
She let him – they walked side-by-side and entered the hotel lobby, both of them dripping wet.
"You are going back to Suna tomorrow?" He asked her, as they were waiting for the elevator.
"Yes."
"When will you come back to Konoha?"
"Oh?" She arched an eyebrow. "My brother is being troublesome?"
"Your brother?" He frowned in confusion.
She let out crystal clear laugh. "Right, he looks more like my father."
Her eyes darkened a little as she mentioned him. "Anyway."
"So…?" That was not his question, and this time he was determined to get his answer.
"Probably next week, or next month?" Temari answered without a thought. "Depends, really."
Shikamaru let out an unsatisfied grunt. "How troublesome."
They entered the elevator - he stood next to the panel and pressed on the ninth floor. She pressed on the number ten and moved to the opposite side of the elevator.
"You'd better take a hot shower right after," he said, as the lift stopped on the ninth. "You might catch a cold if you drench yourself like that."
She smiled at him. "Hmph."
He smiled at her over his shoulder and left the elevator, shoulder slumping as usual.
His image disappeared as the elevator doors closed.
Temari closed her eyes and sighed softly, as the elevator stopped again on the tenth flooor.
Shikamaru took his shoes off as he entered the apartment.
"I am home," he said.
The living room smelled like cooking – warm, familiar.
"Your dinner is on the table," he heard her, as well as the sound of water flowing from the faucet in the kitchen. "Your father won't be back until late tonight, he is out drinking with Inoichi-san and Chouza-san."
"Thanks." He approached the table and sat down.
Grilled mackerel with rice with kelp marinated in vinegar on the side.
He smiled to himself – his mother's occasional indulgences always made him smile. She used to cook his favourite foods as a way of rewarding him, or comforting him.
He ate the food silently, quietly enjoying each bite.
"Shiho came looking for you earlier today," Yoshino said. "I told her to come back afterwards, she should be back at around this time."
"I see, then I will go back to my place."
He nodded at his mother and put on his shoes.
"Shikamaru?" His mother voice rang as he opened the door.
He stopped and turned around, in his mother's hand he saw a pink envelope.
"Inoichi-san came over earlier today with his wife." Yoshino said softly. "He said…"
"Ino is getting married." Shikamaru completed her sentence.
She nodded, looking for signs of anger, sadness from her son.
Shikamaru nodded with a smile. "Finally." He said softly, sighing.
He felt lighter. Like a giant rock on his back has been finally dropped.
So this is the true feeling of letting go.
The weightlessness. The freedom.
He took the pink evelope from his mother and opened it.
Inside, he saw an invitation card – with Ino and Sai's names printed on it.
"Four months later, huh." He said, with a tiny smile on his face.
Yoshino looked at her son with furrowed brows. "Are you okay, Shikamaru?"
"I am fine, mom." He said with a reassuring smile on his face. "Don't worry about me."
His mother smiled at him, which slowly faded. Her brows furrowed again.
"Don't smoke so much, you stink." She ordered.
"Yes 'mam." He left without another word.
It only took him ten steps to get to his door.
Shiho was already there, her frizzy blonde hair was tied up as usual, eyes darting towards him as he approached – he never took a good long look at her eyes, even after she wore contact lenses.
Apparently they were brown, their irises dark like a swirl. Her eyelashes were of medium length – on top of everything, she looked tired.
The looks she gave him were … troublesome.
"Come in," he said softly, as he unlocked the door.
She followed him, not saying a word.
Sitting down on the couch, he walked into the kitchen and got two cups of tea for themselves.
"I need to talk to you, Shikamaru-kun." Shiho's lips were trembling; she was looking at the ground when he passed her the cup of tea.
"I need to talk to you too." His voice was his usual bored, irritated monotone.
"But you can go ahead."
"You said you wanted to talk about something," Shiho said weakly. "The other day, you said to talk about it when you're sober."
Shikamaru sighed and pulled out a cigarette.
He held it between his lips and took out the lighter, the flame flickering in front of his eyes.
He sighed and let out a white, minty cloud of smoke from his mouth.
"Ahh that." He said, looking up at the ceiling. "That is actually what I want to talk to you about."
Shiho sighed herself as she took another sip from her cup of tea. "Do continue, Shikamaru-kun."
"Have I ever told you why I started to drink so much and smoke?" He let out another cloud of smoke from a deep sigh.
Shiho shook her head.
"It all began when Ino broke up with me when we graduated from university. The exact details are not that important, but well … I decided to take up the habits that would numb me, calm me or just fill up the holes it left in me."
Shiho nodded.
"And after that, I began going out a lot at night," he continued. "One-night stands and all."
"Even after…"
"It happened once or twice during these months." He acknowledged without second thoughts.
Shiho's face twitched for one second, before relaxing again.
"Anyway," he took the almost burnt out cigarette from his lips and squashed it into the ashtray. "The thing is, you reminded me of myself, who waited indefinitely for Ino."
"That is because you love her." Shiho nodded. "And I am doing this for the same reason."
"You have to recognize the fact – Ino will never love me back, neither will I to you." He bit his lip, thinking if he had been too brutal with the fact. "Anyway, I have to apologize to you."
Shiho took another sip from her tea.
"I have been very selfish, giving you false hope, making you feel this troublesome pain that I had been feeling for years." He sighed. "You don't deserve this."
Shiho said nothing, as a tear rolled down her cheek.
"And about the plans of my life – what you said was my plan … I just wanted a trouble-free life." He laid back a little on the armchair, with a tiny smile on his face.
"I said that when I was twelve years old, I barely knew the world – all I wanted to do was run away." He chuckled a little. "As I grew up, I knew that life would not go according to your plan – I never planned to fall in love with Ino, never planned to get dumped by her so many times…"
He went silent for a couple of seconds.
"And I never knew that I could find someone in a one-night stand."
Shiho turned and looked at him in the eye.
"Is she… not troublesome?" She asked softly.
"No, just the opposite." He smiled at her. "She is the most troublesome person I have ever met. Even more troublesome than my mother."
Shiho smiled as she nodded. She rubbed her eye lightly.
"I see your point, Shikamaru-kun." Shiho sighed.
"My guess would be … you wouldn't want me pestering you."
She smiled as she fished around her bag, putting the replicate keys of his apartment on the coffee table.
She stood up and walked towards the door; Shikamaru followed her.
"I guess I will see you tomorrow at work then, Shikamaru-kun." She smiled, as she turned around, her back facing him.
"Shiho." His voice stopped her, she did not move.
There was a lazy smile on his face; he was leaning on the doorframe.
"Find someone that loves you back, and you will understand what I mean."
She returned a smile over her shoulder.
"I will."
"And put your glasses back on – you look more Shiho that way." He smiled again at her. "Goodnight."
Shiho walked away from the door as it shut behind her.
Author's note:
Enjoy the chapter!
Shikamaru is a nice guy - he just got lost in between and now he has found his way (at least we all hope he does)
I hope the story is not as confusing now!
Enjoy! xoxo
V.S.V
